Hot Marriage. Cool Parents.

By Jamie Otis and Doug Hehner

Listen to a podcast, please open Podcast Republic app. Available on Google Play Store.


Category: Kids & Family

Open in iTunes


Open RSS feed


Open Website


Rate for this podcast


Ally
 Jan 10, 2019
Too many pee and poo stories. To keep it interesting they need to step up their game. It's going to get really boring if they don't.

Description

Are you looking for someone to share their deepest, darkest secrets on keeping their marriage spicy? Are you like, “puhhlease DISH on how to be a cool parent .. because, yeah ... I dunno!” Well Jamie Otis and Doug Hehner have got all you hubbies and wifeys - and mommies and daddies - covered, because each week they find a guest who will SPILL all their dirty secrets! Because we all wanna keep our marriages hot and our parenting cool!

Episode Date
Ep 5: Struggling With Loss (You’re Not Alone!)
45:04

We never planned on recording this episode, but you know how much it matters to us to be open and honest with you. We’ll never pretend that everything is perfect; we value you enough that we want to be vulnerable with you.

Not long ago, we announced that we were pregnant. Jamie felt deep down that this was going to be a great pregnancy… until she started spotting. This can be totally normal for some women and some pregnancies, but Jamie had the exact same symptoms with our angel baby, Jonathan. Unfortunately, for us, the spotting indicated that there was a problem.

If you haven’t heard, we had a (failed) miscarriage. We were so excited for this pregnancy, but part of us was guarded because we had lost a pregnancy before, even as we tried to stay positive. It’s amazing how hard it is to stay calm and stress-free while accepting that you can’t control whether your pregnancy has a successful outcome.

Of course, this brings up a lot of complicated thoughts and emotions. We’re so happy for our friends who are due around the same time we were, but at the same time, it’s impossible to avoid feeling sorrow that we’re not going to be having a baby with them. Something we’re grateful for is that we went against the conventional wisdom of waiting to tell people about a pregnancy; how can they support you through your loss if you don’t tell them? On that note, we’re so grateful for the outpouring of love. Thank you for helping us to get through things.

If you’re wondering what you should (and shouldn’t) say to someone who has suffered from a loss, don’t miss this episode. We’ll discuss some tips, and list some specific things you absolutely shouldn’t say (even if they’re true for us). For example, don’t ever say things like, “At least you know you can get pregnant,” “You weren’t that far along,” or “This miscarriage must be easier than the last one.” Things you can say include, “I’m thinking of you,” “This baby will never be forgotten,” “I’m so sorry for your loss,” and “I can’t imagine what you’re going through.” Even better is to sit and just listen!

We don’t want you to ever feel alone. If you’ve suffered with fertility in any way, and you feel like there’s no one you can talk to about it, please reach out to us! So many of us go through these things, and no one should ever feel like they don’t have someone on their side.

Finally, we’ll chat about Jamie’s book, Wifey 101! Tune into the episode to hear what it’s about and get a taste of what you’ll read when you buy it. (Plus you’ll learn how to get a signed copy!)

Links and Resources:

Married at First Sight

Hot Marriage. Cool Parents. on YouTube

Jamie Otis

Wifey 101 by Jamie Otis

hotmarriagecoolparents on Instagram

Jamie Otis on Instagram

Doug Hehner on Instagram

FabFitFun (our sponsor!) Use coupon code 40Jamie for a discount!

Miracles in the Making

Jan 23, 2019
Ep 4: Pregnancy, Loss, and FertilityIQ
55:04

Today’s episode isn’t an easy one. We recorded this episode when we were at the end of the third trimester, but shortly after the conversation, we suffered a miscarriage (as you may have heard about). Even though we’re in a different space now, we still absolutely wanted to share this episode with you.

A year and a half after we got married, we got pregnant with our son Jonathan. We were so excited, and publicly shared that we were pregnant with our first baby. Just a week later, we found out that the pregnancy wasn’t viable and we were going to end up losing our baby. Naturally we wanted to find a reason or an explanation, and a way to make sure it wouldn’t ever happen again. But the hard truth is that sometimes it’s just out of your control.

In the first part of this episode, we’ll dig into that first pregnancy experience, including the aftermath, how we dealt with losing Jonathan, and why bunnies have become so important to us.

We’ll then move onto talking with our guests, Deb and Jake from FertilityIQ. Their website helps people find a doctor who will be a good fit based on anonymous reviews. The two of them were fertility patients who got pregnant and had two miscarriages, and felt like no one could give them a straight answer about anything. Ending up with the wrong doctor was a waste of time and money, and they were frustrated with not being able to find the right information.

Deb and Jake decided to do something about both of these problems! They started FertilityIQ to help people find the right doctor and to provide real data to help people make the right decisions. In our conversation, they’ll also talk about their own journey with infertility, including some of the things that they tried. No matter where you are along your fertility journey, this conversation should help you understand that you’re not alone and there are resources out there to help.

 

Today’s Guests:

FertilityIQ

FertilityIQ on Instagram

FertilityIQ on Facebook

FertilityIQ on Twitter

Deborah Anderson-Bialis on LinkedIn

Jake Anderson-Bialis on LinkedIn

 

In This Episode:

[01:51] - Jamie and Doug welcome listeners to the episode, joke about a fourth episode anniversary, and mention today’s guests, before talking about their experience with their first pregnancy.

[06:56] - A week after announcing their pregnancy, Jamie and Doug found that it wasn’t viable. They share details of the experience.

[12:22] - Jamie and Doug describe the moment that they learned that their pregnancy wasn’t viable.

[17:08] - We hear about the impact that Jonathan made on Jamie and Doug.

[22:00] - It’s nice to be around positivity, Doug points out.

[23:00] - Jamie introduces today’s guests, Deb and Jake from FertilityIQ, before we hear messages about a few amazing sponsors.

[27:04] - Deb and Jake come onto the show and explain who they are, their story, and what led them to create FertilityIQ.

[29:50] - Who is the intended audience for FertilityIQ?

[31:49] - Doug points out that it’s easy to experience information overload when it comes to everything that goes into fertility. Jamie then talks about some of the struggles around infertility.

[32:28] - Do Deb and Jake have anything they want to share about their own infertility experience?

[36:06] - Deb explains how an egg retrieval, the following fertilization process, and the implantation of the resulting embryos works in IVF.

[38:51] - Are Deb and Jake in the process of doing one of their fertility grant giveaways? Deb answers, and explains how to qualify.

[43:27] - We learn about how Deb and Jake verify reviews, and how the rating categories work.

[46:21] - Jake mentions that a lot of people claim you’ll forget about the fertility community once you have a baby.

[49:04] - Where can people find Deb, Jake, and FertilityIQ on social media?

[51:55] - Jamie and Doug chat about next week’s exciting guests!

 

Links and Resources:

Married at First Sight

Hot Marriage. Cool Parents. on YouTube

Jamie Otis

Wifey 101 by Jamie Otis

Jamie and Doug announce their first pregnancy on the Today Show

White With Style (our sponsor!) Use coupon code Jamie28 for a huge discount!

FabFitFun (our sponsor!) Use coupon code 40Jamie for a discount!

FertilityIQ

FertilityIQ on Instagram

FertilityIQ on Facebook

FertilityIQ on Twitter

Deborah Anderson-Bialis on LinkedIn

Jake Anderson-Bialis on LinkedIn

Jan 16, 2019
Ep 3: Should Hubby Watch the Birth?
01:10:46

By now you probably know that Jamie is pregnant again! We’re so excited, and want to bring you along on our journey. That’s why today’s episode includes the audio from the exact moment that Doug learned about the pregnancy. We had just gotten back from Disney, and he was feeding Henley. As you’ll hear, his reaction wasn’t as excited as it could have been (and neither was Henley’s), but you get to share in the genuine, real reaction rather than a staged moment.

Today’s amazing guests are the fantastic Erica Eckman from Everything Erica and her husband Dan, a real estate guru. She and I met on social media when she reached out on Instagram, and she’s honestly one of my best friends now. She and her husband are intelligent, down-to-earth, and just lovely people.

If you’ve ever wondered about how Erica and Jamie met, this is the episode for you! You’ll learn that Erica took a chance and reached out, the two featured each other, and the friendship blossomed organically from there. As Erica points out, you never know what might happen if you just say “hi”!

Erica is a fairly new mom, and the four of us will talk about the experiences of birth and parenthood. Of course having children is an amazing blessing, but there are definitely parts of the pregnancy, birth, and parenthood process that’s a struggle. There’s no shame in asking for help or not being able to do it all yourself.

We’ll dig into all sorts of things, including how Erica’s birth process went, whether men look at women’s vaginas differently after watching them give birth, how long the recovery process takes, how much it hurts after birth (including a story involving peeing on a nurse), the issues that can be involved in breastfeeding, and much more.

Today’s Guests:

Erica Eckman on LinkedIn

@everythingerica on Instagram

@dansdadlife on Instagram

Everything Erica

In This Episode:

[01:43] - Jamie and Doug chat about the podcast, and introduce today’s topic: Jamie’s pregnancy announcement to Doug!

[05:32] - We hear the audio from when Jamie announced her pregnancy to Doug right after getting back from Disney.

[10:08] - The reaction wasn’t as enthusiastic as it could have been, but at least it was genuine!

[13:57] - Erica Eckman from Everything Erica and her husband Dan are today’s amazing guests.

[16:57] - Jamie explains who Dan and Erica are for people who aren’t yet familiar with them.

[18:10] - Erica shares the story of how she and Jamie initially met.

[21:14] - Doug brings up the point of people surrounding themselves with people who they admire or look up to.

[23:31] - Did Erica deliver her daughter vaginally or through a C-section?

[28:35] - Since Jamie works in labor and delivery, she was interested in her birth process and even checked her own dilation.

[29:38] - How painful is it after having a baby?! Erica shares a post-birth bathroom story about the pain of even peeing.

[31:50] - Erica and Jamie chat about breastfeeding and Erica’s struggles with it.

[36:02] - Is the common sense of shame over not breastfeeding self-imposed shame, or is it from external sources?

[40:45] - Doug wonders whether there’s a good way to ask new mothers whether they’re okay or might be grappling with depression.

[44:21] - Does Dan remember the first time he watched his daughter at home alone?

[49:07] - Erica shares a big takeaway: it’s okay not to have love at first sight with your baby.

[53:00] - Do Erica and Dan have a favorite motto that they live by?

[58:48] - You can tell when a baby is ready for sleep training, Erica points out.

[60:20] - What are Erica and Dan’s top tips for keeping their marriage hot and their parenting cool?

[65:36] - Erica shares a favorite quote that she lives by.

Links and Resources:

Married at First Sight

Hot Marriage. Cool Parents. on YouTube

Jamie Otis

Wifey 101 by Jamie Otis

Burrow (our sponsor!)

FabFitFun (our sponsor!) Use coupon code 40Jamie for a discount!

White With Style (our sponsor!) Use coupon code Jamie28 for a huge discount!

Off the Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe

Jana Kramer Slams Body Shamers Criticizing Her 1 Week After Giving Birth: ‘I’m So Frustrated’

Jan 09, 2019
Ep 2: Moving, Marriage, and Pregnancy with Ashley and Anthony from "Married at First Sight"
53:53

Last week, on our first-ever episode of our new podcast, we shared an exciting announcement. If you didn’t hear it, we won’t keep you in suspense: we’re pregnant!! Doug’s first reaction was concern for our wonderful daughter Henley, but we quickly got super excited.

After a couple stories about intimate moments gone very wrong, we’ll transition into talking about more important (and less, uh, personal) things: our two amazing guests today from our MAFS family! In case you’re not familiar with our story or the acronym, we met and got married on the same day on the first season of the show Married at First Sight

Our guests, >Ashley Petta and Anthony D’Amico went through the same crazy experience in season 5, and it turned out wonderfully for them too! If you’ve ever doubted the idea of love at first sight, you need to watch their season. They’re still so in love, beautifully happy, and are super pregnant in their new house as we speak. 

We’ll chat about the experience of moving while heavily pregnant, which is something we have in common. We’ll also dig into the topic of intimacy while pregnant, including suddenly-larger boobs that are off-limits (ouch!) and having sex while pregnant. We also share the stories of how we respectively revealed our babies’ genders. 

You’ll learn that Anthony has special dream-powers, because he figured out his future wife’s first initial and his future baby’s gender through dreams. We then talk about baby names! We always knew we wanted to name our daughter Henley, but we don’t even have a boy’s name picked out. Ashley and Anthony aren’t ready to reveal their unborn daughter’s name yet, but they’ll share a name they aren’t using!

Tune in to hear more about all of this! We’ll also talk about how long house-hunting took for them, whether they have experience with other infants in the family, taking advantage of pregnancy (and nursing), putting swings together, conceiving our babies, and more. Our daughter Henley will even make an appearance!

Links and Resources:

Married at First Sight

Ashley Petta on Instagram

Anthony D’Amico on Instagram

White With Style (our sponsor!) Use coupon code Jamie28 for a huge discount!

FabFitFun (our sponsor!) Use code 40Jamie to save 40% off your first box

Married at First Sight: Happily Ever After?

Erica Eckman on Instagram

Wifey 101 by Jamie Otis on Amazon

Wifey 101 (autographed copy)

Jan 02, 2019
Ep. 1: Our Surprise Revealed
34:41

Doug and Jamie make their surprise announcement! 

Jamie says,"Please don't judge me after hearing this". 

Jamie is searching for her father. 

Changes coming in Jamie's nursing career. 

Plans for future episodes. 

For full episode notes: https://jamieotis.com/1

Sponsors

Burrow (Get $75 Off)

FabFitFun (use code 40Jamie for 40% off)

Jamie's Book

Wifey 101 by Jamie Otis on Amazon

Wifey 101 (autographed copy)

Dec 25, 2018
Introduction
10:12

First of all, I think that maybe people don't know us, so we should give a little background on us, because we're a little crazy to start.

It's been almost five years. We were on a little show that nobody knew about called "Married At First Sight."

Doug: And I remember it perfectly, I was in my car, I was working for a water company at the time. And I got a voicemail saying, "Hey are you single? We're doing a show in the tri-state area. Give us a call back."

Jamie: That's how you were asked to be on "Married At First Sight?"

Doug: And I called back and I spoke to somebody and I said, "Yes, I'm single and okay I'll fill out a questionnaire." And I want to say it was maybe, what was it, three weeks later, I found out I was getting married and going on a honeymoon.

Jamie: Yeah. And honestly, very much similar for me. I got a call and they said, "Do you have trouble dating in New York City?" And I was like, "Raise your right hand and your left hand if you could understand that." 

So, long story short, we were married at first sight on season one, which is now a huge hit show on Lifetime.

We also are so excited that we now have a daughter and it was not an easy path whatsoever-

We really struggled a lot with pregnancy and getting pregnant and then ... Well actually the truth of the matter is, when I got pregnant with Henley, our daughter, the pregnancy was very easy. And it was almost so easy that it was scary because we had suffered at loss at 17 weeks and one day and so that's definitely mid-second trimester and it was just scary.

Even before though, I think that where we're coming from, not many people have gone through what we went through. Being married at first sight. I mean, yes, there's arranged marriages but I mean, this was literally putting your fate and future in the hands of experts. And giving information about yourself and hoping that you know yourself enough to know what you want and getting married at first sight and marrying a stranger and taking that step which is nutty. It is crazy but it also made sense at the time. And it worked out.

That being said, we are not experts but we've had this fast track tutorial on how to work on a marriage, what do to with a marriage, we've reached extreme lows, we've went through extreme highs, we have a child now and I think over five years, it's almost like we went through what most couples go through in maybe 10, 20. Jamie has a very unique background with her upbringing and environment, which is almost complete opposite to mine. And I think that not only do opposites attract but I think that we have very different perspectives on things.

Sorry to share our weird truths. But you know what, we didn't become named the most awkward couple on TV for no good reason.

But I genuinely am excited for this podcast because it's gonna give everyone a voice and we want to speak with you, we want to talk about what you talk about, we want to keep you in our lives. And I think that this is gonna be a fun journey.

Yeah, we are so excited to get to know you guys more and be able to have another way to kinda communicate with you and keep in touch with you and hang out with you. So every week you'll be able to get a new episode from us so I think this is the third time we've tried to say goodbye, but clearly we love to talk.

Yes, we love you guys so much and like we said before, give us anybody that you love and you want to hear from on our podcast that relates with parenting or marriage. We would love to bring them on and chat with them. So yeah, let us know and of course subscribe because Christmas Day we have a little gift for you.

Visit us online at:
https://jamieotis.com

Dec 25, 2018