Mating Matters

By Dr. Wendy Walsh

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Description

Host Dr. Wendy Walsh uses science, personal interviews and pop culture to reveal that mating strategy is the secret evolutionary motivation for most every human behavior. We are wired to reproduce. Even when we are not thinking about sex, our ancient programming makes us respond to reproductive cues that impact just about every decision we make. Using evolutionary psychology, Mating Matters examines relationships, sexuality, and how society and culture shape us all. Dr. Wendy Walsh looks at the biological, psychological and sociological underpinnings of love, attachment and gender dynamics. Visit www.DrWendyWalsh.com for more.

Please be aware this podcast talks scientifically about topics that include sex, violence and other aspects of the human condition that may be challenging. Adult language is used periodically.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Episode Date
Precocious Puberty
2003
How old were you when you started puberty? Most people will say somewhere between 10-15. There is a smaller percentage of people, though, who will experience those physical and hormonal changes earlier, in some cases MUCH earlier. Ladies, can you imagine starting your period when you were seven years old? Dr. Wendy talks with the endocrinologist who literally wrote the textbook on precocious puberty and a few people who have experienced this rare condition personally or as a parent.

Questions? Thoughts? Call the Mating Matters message line at (323) 207-8277 or send a voice memo to matingmatters@iheartmedia.com.
Oct 14, 2020
Mating Messages: Questions From Quarantine
1175
[EPISODE NOTE: Question two is regarding pedophilia.] Dr. Wendy answers questions from our listeners while we've all been on some level of lockdown. Thanks to all of our dedicated listeners who have called our message line at (323) 207-8277 or emailed us voice memos at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com. Keep them coming!
Sep 30, 2020
The Trouble With Testosterone 2.0 - With Brooks Laich
2127
This episode is an oldie but a bestie. As a special treat to fluff it up, though, Dr. Wendy talks to former hockey player Brooks Laich about, well, his testosterone. He is surprisingly open about how being a professional athlete could affect falling in love. Plus the show: how this powerful little hormone affects so much of a man's behavior and personality. Women, did you know you can increase his testosterone level any time you want?
Sep 09, 2020
BONUS: Racy Relations
1060
Dr. Wendy Walsh digs deeper into a major surface issue - skin color. Where does racism come from? Did racism evolve in homosapiens or is it something humans develop within their lifespan? She also points out important things to be aware of as you navigate the world or have kids of your own like implicit bias and how dating apps could be reinforcing racism as we search for love. Dr. Wendy also talks about the one group of people least likely to ever marry - not because they don't want to, but because life has gotten particularly complicated for them.

Call our Mating Matters Message Line at 323-207-8277 or leave an email or voice memo at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com with any questions, comments or desires for future episodes.
Aug 17, 2020
Quarantine Edition
1902
In this Quarantine Episode of Mating Matters, Dr. Wendy touches on all kinds of tools and tips for people stuck at home with one person or with no person - or too many persons! Let give each other a break right now, and especially ourselves. Adversity does NOT "reveal character" it only reveals the coping strategy a person might have in crazy times, which he or she may come by honestly. She also goes over the three main ways our psychological immune system is trying to help us through this crazy time. Oh, have you been thinking of contacting an old flame? More on that!
Apr 24, 2020
Women's Intelligent Bodies with Dr. Cindy Meston
2476
Dr. Cindy Meston is a clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Texas at Austin. She is also the director of the Sexual Psychophysiology Laboratory there. She may be best known for her research on the female orgasm, but she says her primary research interest is sexual arousal. You know, without arousal not much else happens.

You first heard her in our Mating Matters episode called "Why Women Have Sex."

In this conversation Dr. Meston talks about the preparation hypothesis, something called “desynchrony,” why a sexual contract between two people is often successful, and where the heck the pink Viagra is for women. She also tells us the number one sexual complaint in America. Basically, Dr. Cindy Meston talks to us about women’s intelligent bodies.

Please be aware there is discussion regarding sexual assault, rape and a woman’s physical protection response...sometimes including involuntary orgasm. The discussions begin around 11:30 and 29:30. Both last about a minute.

Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277 with a thought, question or comment.
Mar 06, 2020
Mating Message: Daddy Issues
918
Girls with Daddy Issues. Boys with Mommy issues. Dr. Wendy answers a listener's question from our message line! Our relationships with our parents is a key ingredient of how we form attachments as adults. There are a few ways we deal with the abandonment, neglect or smothering we felt as children and no gender is immune.

Have a question for Dr. Wendy? Call 323-207-8277

Further relevant listening: What Is Love?, Mothers, MILFs & Wives.
Feb 06, 2020
Quickie: Peace Be Of You
1038
Turns out homo sapiens are built for peace, calm and equality. That's right. Our most natural state is peaceful. There actually was very little fighting among bands of hunter-gatherers, and only then when they felt there was no other choice, like when the Spaniards or British appeared with their weapons. The happiest couples and the most cooperative kids develop from a sense of autonomy, equality, and play...and they are at peace.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 - We are currently looking for grandmothers. Are your grandchildren a part of your weekly life or do they live across the country? How much or little have you been involved in raising or supporting your g-kids?
Jan 30, 2020
Quickie: Mating Strategies and Fatherhood
1355
Dr. Wendy loves her research, but sometimes some of the best stuff doesn't fit neatly in to one of our Mating Matters episodes. In this Quickie, she looks at some of the latest findings in evolutionary psychology and anthropology and shares the gems. She talks about mating strategies of women and men, including how men will often use PDF's (public displays of fatherhood) as one way of impressing women and why less sex after having a baby is NOT a sign of trouble. In fact, it's just the opposite. This episode is JAM packed with interesting things learned from modern day hunter-gatherers.

Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.
Jan 22, 2020
Royal Hunter Gatherers
1021
The world has been abuzz with the "shocking" news that England's Prince Harry and wife Meghan Markle are turning in their keys to the kingdom. First, this shouldn't be shocking to anyone. There've been rumblings of discord and discontent for several months. Dr. Wendy is here to explain how this all actually makes perfect evolutionary sense. On one hand they're doing what our hunter-gatherer ancestors did. On the other hand they are also living on the forefront of the evolution of marriage itself. Marriage is no longer about social survival or strict gender roles. A modern marriage is way more than that. Harry and Meghan are living a thoroughly modern marriage.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277
Jan 15, 2020
BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Darryl Gwynne
1886
BEHIND THE MINDS is a series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. 

Darryl Gwynne, PhD, was the charming expert you heard in "Pornography Mindf**k." Remember the beetles falling hard for the beer bottles? That's him. He's a professor of biology at the University of Toronto at Mississauga. His research is mainly about sexual selection and trying to understand the evolution of sex differences and behavior. Of course, there's a twist. His primary test subjects are insects, but, hey, we're not so different. No, really... Enjoy!

Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it!
Jan 08, 2020
Funny Is for Foreplay
2091
We know that laughter is good for our health. It lowers stress hormones which helps our immune system work better. But is this why a sense of humor evolved in humans? Not totally. Turns out humor has been of primo importance in our natural and sexual selection. On this episode, we explore the science of comedy and why women can't seem to say no to a funny mate.

Basically, if you want to woo a woman, work on your wit and word play.

Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277
Dec 18, 2019
The Slower Road to Love
1856
Love and attachment may come in stages, phases and flavors. Love relationships may involve sex, affection, emotional intimacy, commitment, public displays of love or private trysts. But the order of those stages is changing. If you’re over 40, fasten your seat belts folks, because Millennials are showing us how our anthropological ancestors sampled from the smorgasbord of human relationships, all in the name of good reproductive choices.

Questions? Thoughts? Experiences? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277
Dec 11, 2019
Quickie: The New Double Standard
927
Dr. Wendy opened her Facebook page to discover a question posed to her that really rubbed her wrong. Who says modern women still have to live up to some sexual moral code created by society hundreds of years ago? The double standard is that thing that says men get points for sexual experience, but women get judged for it. These are new days and with equality comes freedom.

Have a question, thought or experience you'd like to share? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277!
Dec 04, 2019
Quickie: 10 Tips for Better Relationships
769
Mating Matters is all about the evolution of human mating and mating strategy - that is how to find a mate. In this quickie episode, Dr. Wendy thought it would be a great idea to talk a little about what you do with your mate once you catch one! Now what?? Here are ten great tips on making love last once you found your match.

Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277
Nov 27, 2019
Allo Parents with the Grande Dame!
788
Dr. Wendy's sick (yeah, right). I'm not buying it. I think she just wanted to pull one of her favorite interviews of all time with her personal and professional hero, primatologist and anthropologist, Dr. Sarah Blaffer Hrdy. You've heard her name mentioned in many episodes where Dr. Wendy talks about allo parents (Survival of the Gayest and Mother's MILFs and Wives Parts 1 and 2, and others). Allo parents are all the people who help a child grow, stay safe and flourish. Lots of people are allo parents and don't even know it: grandmothers, aunts, uncles, teachers, neighbors, mommy's girlfriends, etc. These people are so important in human evolution, Dr. Hrdy and Dr. Walsh both think there should be an Allo Parents Day.

The interview was broadcast on KFI AM640, an iHeart radio station in Los Angeles. The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show is every Sunday, 4:00-6:00 PM PST and on the iHeart Radio App.

Call the Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277.
Nov 20, 2019
Allo Parents with the Grande Dame!
788
Dr. Wendy's sick (yeah, right). I'm not buying it. I think she just wanted to pull one of her favorite interviews of all time with her personal and professional hero, primatologist and anthropologist, Dr. Sarah Blaffer Hrdy. You've heard her name mentioned in many episodes where Dr. Wendy talks about allo parents (Survival of the Gayest and Mother's MILFs and Wives Parts 1 and 2, and others). Allo parents are all the people who help a child grow, stay safe and flourish. Lots of people are allo parents and don't even know it: grandmothers, aunts, uncles, teachers, neighbors, mommy's girlfriends, etc. These people are so important in human evolution, Dr. Hardy and Dr. Walsh both think there should be an Allo Parents Day.

The interview was broadcast on KFI AM640, an iHeart radio station in Los Angeles. The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show is every Sunday, 4:00-6:00 PM PST and on the iHeart Radio App.

Call the Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277.
Nov 20, 2019
Quickie: Is Monogamy Natural?
902
A Mating Matters Quickie is a flash episode to cover some general facts. Is monogamy natural? Are we torturing ourselves needlessly? Is pairing up with just one person a social construct forced upon us?? Now, now...so dramatic. Believe it or not there's a really good reason humans evolved to create long term pair bonds. And guess what, guys, you were a really big part of its creation.

Mating Matters episodes related to monogamy:
Hidden Eggs
What is Love?
Poly-Wanna-Cracker?
The Secret Lives of Super Attachers

Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us! We want to hear the unusual things that turn you on - as always, without shame or judgement. A fetish is "a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc." We've all heard about a foot fetish. Well, if you can relate to this or in some other way, let us know.

Thanks, listeners! We love hearing from you.
Nov 13, 2019
Quickie: Is Monogamy Natural?
902
A Mating Matters Quickie is a flash episode to cover some general facts. Is monogamy natural? Are we torturing ourselves needlessly? Is pairing up with just one person a social construct forced upon us?? Now, now...so dramatic. Believe it or not there's a really good reason humans evolved to create long term pair bonds. And guess what, guys, you were a really big part of its creation.

Mating Matters episodes related to monogamy:
Hidden Eggs
What is Love?
Poly-Wanna-Cracker?
The Secret Lives of Super Attachers

Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us! We want to hear the unusual things that turn you on - as always, without shame or judgement. A fetish is "a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc." We've all heard about a foot fetish. Well, if you can relate to this or in some other way, let us know.

Thanks, listeners! We love hearing from you.
Nov 13, 2019
The Secret Life of Super Attachers
2058
Why is it that some people struggle with maintaining intimate relationships and others seem to skip through the decades seemingly with no trouble at all? What have they got that others don't? What do they know? What's their SECRET!?!
Nov 06, 2019
The Secret Life of Super Attachers
2058
Why is it that some people struggle with maintaining intimate relationships and others seem to skip through the decades seemingly with no trouble at all? What have they got that others don't? What do they know? What's their SECRET!?!

Well, aside from probably having good models of love as they were growing up, some people literally were born with a genetic advantage. But once again, remember, biology is not destiny! Here's what you need to know to make the most of love in your life.

Comments, questions, a story you'd like to share? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us if you have ever fallen in love with and/or had a physical relationship with someone you're related to. There's an explanation and it's anonymous, of course.
Nov 06, 2019
BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Maryanne Fisher
1809
BEHIND THE MINDS is the series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. 
In this Behind the Minds episode Dr. Wendy talks to Dr. Maryanne Fisher. You heard her first in our episode called "Mean Girls, Gold Diggers and Sluts." She is a Professor in the Department of Psychology, and a member of the Women and Gender Studies Program, at Saint Mary's University in Halifax, Canada. She also happens to be a rockstar as one of the few feminist evolutionary psychologists.
Think about it. Historically, most people researching biology, history, psychology (etc, etc.) have been men. It hasn't been so long since scientists acknowledged there are real differences in the sexes, and that there may actually be two sides to...uhhh, EVERYTHING.
In this fly on the wall extended interview, these women talk about our man Darwin, female strategy, mate guarding, slut shaming, The Contrast Effect (YIKES!!)...and more, of course!
Enjoy!
Call the Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277. Talk to us. Who started puberty EARLY? Raise your hand....and then pick up the phone. (Early means first in your class and enough to make you know something is different for you.)
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Oct 30, 2019
Mating Message: Cinderella's Mate Crunch
1026
We freaked a listener out. We didn't mean to, but we can certainly understand why. So assuming she wasn't the only one, we have recorded Wendy's advice to a panicked PhD candidate for anyone else out there who needs to know: What Do I Do Now? Yes, it seems there is a mate crunch. That is, more women focusing on their higher education, big careers and personal accomplishments than ever before, while men have maintained their same numbers and are therefore actually falling behind. Knowing there might not be a corresponding mate for every high achieving woman, some ladies are understandably a little jittery. Don't worry, girls. Don't worry, guys. Dr. Wendy suggests perhaps this is just evolution doing its thing and maybe it's time to redefine the Cinderella story. Humans are highly adaptable and super great problem solvers. We got this! Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 Call us! By the way, we're on the search for people who started puberty exceptionally young - like, 10ish and younger. Talk to us! To see the transcripts of our full episodes, click HERE. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Oct 23, 2019
Why Women Have Sex
1993
Why do women have sex? Weeeeell....it's complicated. Let's just say, guys, you're not wrong if you ever feel a little confused. Guess what, so are we sometimes. But truly, when we dive down in to it, it just goes to prove the theory that women are super duper complex. We are cerebral, but emotional; passionate, but defensive; curious, but cautious. And, of course, none of this matters if the garbage hasn't been taken out. You'll hear from two experts who literally wrote the book. Before them everyone just assumed...duh, women have sex to make babies and shower their boo with love. These two discovered there's A LOT more going on when women eventually have sex. To hear Dr. Cindy Meston's 2010 talk, click HERE. To hear Dr. David Buss' 2010 talk, click HERE. For their book, Why Women Have Sex: Understanding Sexual Motivations from Adventure to Revenge (and Everything in Between), click HERE. To find the transcripts of full episodes, click HERE. The Mating Matters message line is: 323-207-8277. Yes, it works! Please leave a message. We love hearing from you. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Oct 16, 2019
Rape - A Love Story (Part 2)
2700
Sexual coercion is not just a woman's problem. It is not something that women just need to learn to deal with, navigate or survive. It is everyone's problem to solve. It is everyone's biological nemesis. With awareness of their own biology, men can recognize triggering situations and avoid them. With awareness of men's slippery wiring, women can recognize dangerous situations and avoid them, if possible.

In Part 1 you heard "D," a self-proclaimed perpetrator, but also a sympathetic human. In Part 2, you'll hear from a brave survivor of rape. She will inspire you and educate you.

Also in this episode, Dr. Randy Thornhill talks about prevention and the psychosocial influences on the men who go there.

Dr. Wendy and I both feel the two Mating Matters episodes about rape are the two most important episodes we could ever produce. However, it is obviously a very sensitive topic. If you are a minor please listen to this with the guidance of a parent. If you are a parent, listen with your teen. If you are a health, sex ed, psychology, or sociology professor, please consider making these required listening.

The Mating Matters message line is 323-207-8277.

You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

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Oct 09, 2019
Rape - A Love Story (Part 1)
2768
Sexual coercion has been part of human history since we were neanderthals living in caves. As abhorrent as  rape is, it is something that has traveled the millennia with us through our genes. It is literally part of us. How do we deal with this horrific fact? We explore it so we can understand it so we can fight against it. A scientist who actually "wrote the book" about sexual coercion helps us get our heads around the truth. And the truth is that this situation involves every single one of us, even those we trust and love dearly.

Then there are the other elements of sexual coercion: intimidation and harassment. Most men never rape, but in the age of enlightenment known as #MeToo, "normal" guys are reflecting and remembering moments that make them cringe. Dr. Wendy talks to a listener who is still carrying the guilt of a moment that happened many years ago as a teenager and wanted to come clean. Please know now his story does not involve rape..

Dr. Wendy and I both feel the two Mating Matters episodes about sexual coercion are probably the most important episodes we could produce. Everyone could benefit from knowing more about our evolutionary wiring. If you are under 18, please include the guidance of a parent. If you are a parent, listen with your teen. If you are a health, sex ed, psychology, or sociology professor, please consider making these required listening.

The Mating Matters message line is 323-207-8277.

You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Oct 02, 2019
Poly-Wanna-Cracker? (Season 2 Premiere)
2163
Are we REALLY supposed to be with one person and ONLY one person, like, FOREVER?! Monogamy can be...challenging. Ask just about anyone who's been married a few years. Mating Matters' Season 2 kicks off with an episode about a hot topic many listeners specifically asked for: Polyamory. Polyamory is the practice of engaging in multiple sexual relationships with the consent of all the people involved. In the real world, though, people use the word to mean many things. Dr. Wendy explores the pros and cons of non-traditional intimate relationships asking if polyamory is actually supported in our human evolution.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Sep 25, 2019
Mating Message: Hold up, Dr. Walsh
244
Season 2 begins next week and we thought this question posed by a listener recently was the perfect primer for the premier episode: Poly-Wanna-Cracker? Polyamory seems to be all the rage in recent years and the idea of getting to love - or at least be intimate with multiple people is certainly intriguing for many. Polyamory's definition, though, is kind of slippery and there may be some confusion out there. Dr. Wendy explains to a caller what true polyamory is in this baby bonus episode.

We can't wait for you all to hear Poly-Wanna-Cracker next week. Personally (this is Brooke), it's one of my tippy top faves so far.

If you have a comment or question for Dr. Wendy, call our Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Sep 19, 2019
Mating Message: Sex Vs. Intimacy
373
In this little bite size bonus, Dr. Wendy addresses listener Alex from Michigan's question she left on our Mating Matters message line. Is it possible to share yourself completely without sex? How intimate can you be before a line is crossed? It's something we've AAALLL struggled with at one time or another as we navigate love and monogamy and sex. Yes, I did say AAALL. I know, a gross generalization. I should have said "many" or "most of us," but I'm just going for it, cuz deep down, isn't it true?

And if i'm wrong, and shame on me, call the Mating Matters message line and tell me so! 323-207-8277

Also, we're looking for a few of you for Season 2 episodes. If you or someone you know is a "super attacher" - someone married for 40+ years, if you started puberty waaay earlier than your friends and/or if you are a woman who has experienced "The Change," call us. Tell us about it.

~Brooke

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Sep 18, 2019
BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Justin Garcia
1883
BEHIND THE MINDS is a new series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. 

Justin Garcia, MS, PhD, was the cool expert you heard in Dating App-athy. He's an evolutionary biologist and sex researcher at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University. Dr. Wendy's interview with him is definitely one of the tops of the season.

He and Dr. Wendy go deep on topics like the paradox of choice, "the secretary's dilemma," and the importance of our attachment styles...and Googling your dates!!

Enjoy!

Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it! 

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Sep 13, 2019
#MeToo Round Two
906
There's been some rumblings that we have now entered the "Post #MeToo" era. Dr. Wendy says, whoa, whoa, whoa!. Not so fast. Well, actually things are moving super fast, but we aren't there quite yet. Instead, it's more like the world has just been taking a breather. In fact, the second wave has just begun. Of course Jeffrey Epstein was a huge sexual offender of young girls, but the last bomb to drop is opera's legendary singer and undisputed "God," Placido Domingo. At least nine women have accused him of aggressive workplace sexual harassment. Dr. Wendy reminds us what the #MeToo umbrella covers and continues the discussion of the evolution of sexual aggression. There's a reason for everything.

Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277
CALL OUT: If you have anything to say about breaking up, including break up styles and skills - are you really good or really bad at it?, stalking or being stalked, please share.

Please try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution. Plug in your ear buds! The microphone sounds pretty darn good.

You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!
Aug 13, 2019
The Evolution of Epstein
839
Uber wealthy millionaire Jeffrey Epstein has a thing for girls. Epstein has been arrested a second time on charges of sex trafficking in Florida and now also in New York. He was sentenced in 2008 to 18 months in a Palm Beach "jail," but ended up doing 13. (It was anything but hard time.) 

Dr. Wendy Walsh digs through the evolutionary reason a man with boundless resources goes to the dark side. And despite a bottomless stash of cash, he and other men like him can't do it alone. You know what, though? Times. They are a-changin'.

Mating Matters is a podcast that includes and examines content meant for adults. It may not be appropriate for younger listeners.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 We are asking for a tough one, but it's important. We are looking for men who have committed a sexual assault. Anyone speaking with us will be kept anonymous.
Jul 10, 2019
Listeners Talk: Pornography Trigger
1819
Listeners Talk is a series of full interviews with Mating Matters fans who have called our message line. Ashli has had some troubling times over the years in her relationships because of pornography. She contacted Dr. Wendy for some clarity and advice. We used some of her interview in Pornography Mindf**k, but, truly, the conversation she had with Dr. Wendy was so great and it's about something that is affecting so many people, we thought we'd just let you all be the fly on the wall and maybe glean a little something extra from the full interview. Enjoy!

Thank you, Ashli, for being so open and candid. It's a topic so many people find difficult to talk about.

**Note: This interview has been slightly edited for quality and relevance.

Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277 
Listener Call Out: If you have anything to say about polyamory or different reasons, women, you have sex, please share.

When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your voice. Plug in your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good!

You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!





Jun 19, 2019
Pornography Mindf**k
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Pornography. It feels like it’s everywhere. And the debate about porn keeps heating up. Is porn addictive? Are our relationships being hurt or helped by pornography? Why did humans evolve to copulate with a screen? Well, it's definitely complicated. Pornography might simply be what is known to scientists who study sexual behavior in other animal species as a "mating error."

Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277
If you have anything to say about breaking up, including break up styles and skills - are you really good or really bad at it?, stalking or being stalked, please share.

When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution. Plug in your ear buds! The microphone sounds pretty darn good.

You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!
Jun 05, 2019
Mean Girls, Gold Diggers and Sluts
1631
You know them; you've seen them; maybe you're even one of them. All the gossip, trash talk and slut shaming nearly every woman has grown up with? It actually has a reproductive purpose. The same kinds of female disses take place across our entire species around the world and have been from the beginning of time. But the truly tricky part is that women actually need each other...badly! From the early days of our species’ evolution, it was a circle of women practicing co-operative parenting who really kept the tribe together. They shared food, protection, emotional support, babysitting duties, and sometimes even men. But, to this day, we never share one of those without a fight. 

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Hot Tip: When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution; use your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good.



May 29, 2019
BONUS: Beware the Silver Medal
1302
Did you already know that to your brain there is no difference between physical pain and emotional pain? There's a scientific reason people describe hurt feelings as a slap in the face or a punch in the gut - it's real. Dr. Wendy explains the importance of social integration, finding your tribe, and looking down when you're feeling bad - especially when you're finding your mate. Oh, the silver medal? For some, that would be a slap in the face.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Hot Tip: When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution; use your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good. 
May 22, 2019
Listeners Talk: An Alpha and His Junk Food Sex
1598
A listener called in to ask Dr. Wendy for some advice about his rampant promiscuity. At almost 7-feet tall. our friend says he went from high school "freak" to college basketball golden boy and the ladies lined up. He's been taking advantage of the sexual opportunities, but he says he isn't any happier than all of the guys he knows who can't even get a date. Men, is he living the dream? You may be surprised by what he says is lacking. Ladies, is he a dog? What's a young, single guy to do when women are throwing themselves at him?

A special thanks to this incredible listener for speaking with Dr. Wendy so honestly and openly. Like a true alpha, he took a risk. Thank you for trusting us.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Hot Tip: When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution; plug in your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good.

Song "Junk Food Sex" is by Beans on Toast. To hear more of his music, click HERE!

Also, you can now find all TRANSCRIPTS of the regular episodes, HERE!
May 16, 2019
BONUS: The Chosen One
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The genes we inherit from our ancestors may set us up for emotional and relationship challenges, but that doesn't mean we are doomed. Biology is not destiny. Dr. Wendy gets in to some new research on intergenerational psychology. If you have unexplained anxiety and depression, you may be carrying trauma from your family's past. You may be "The Chosen One" in your clan to investigate your family's history and heal your family today. But not to worry! It's a gift.

Mating Maters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Research Links:
Study Of Holocaust Survivors Finds Trauma Passed On To Children's Genes
Nongenomic Transmission Across Generations of Maternal Behavior and Stress Responses in the RatBiological pathways for historical trauma to affect health: A conceptual model focusing on epigenetic modificationsSex-Specific Programming of Offspring Emotionality Following Stress Early in PregnancyEpigenetic Influence of Social Experiences Across the Lifespan

Also, you can now find all TRANSCRIPTS of the regular episodes, HERE!
May 08, 2019
Mating Message of Interracial Hots
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In this BONUS tweener (between episodes) Dr. Wendy explores race in evolution and in love, What turns you on? Why? Well, believe it or not for once there is a pretty simple answer! Can't give it all away, but let's just say a joyful squeal from mom might have something to do with it.

We love hearing from you. Thanks to everyone who has called to tell us what they like, would prefer, and want to hear more of. Speaking of callers...

Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277. If you have anything to say about pornography, please share. No judgement, just human behavior. You can talk about you, your significant other, a friend - doesn't matter. What's going on? How often do you watch or indulge? Do you feel like it's getting in the way of your relationship somehow? Can you still enjoy sex with a person? Could you stop?

When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution. Plug in your ear buds! The microphone sounds pretty darn good. Heads up, the message recording will cut you off after 3 minutes.

Also, you can now find all TRANSCRIPTS and the episodes, of course, HERE!
May 02, 2019
The Price of Manhood
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What does it mean to be a man? Why did uber masculine behavior evolve in the first place? Is there a mating advantage? Spoiler alert. There used to be an advantage, but the environment is changing and men are adapting to a different kind of hunting ground. Way back in 1874 Charles Darwin had human mating figured out. In fact, he once wrote “if each male secures two or more females, many males cannot pair.” That’s the biggest fear of any man. No guy wants to be the one who misses out on mating.

Please be aware this episode contains strong language and potentially disturbing content.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Links:
Tony Porter, TEDWomen 2010, "A Call to Men" - https://bit.ly/2Gsrt8Q
Justin Baldoni, TEDWomen 2017, "Why I'm done trying to be 'man enough'" - https://bit.ly/2Ds5XAk



Apr 24, 2019
Mothers, MILF's & Wives - Part 2
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There’s probably no deeper, heart-wrenching emotional experience for women than the feelings that surround reproduction. Hope for a baby, the loss of a baby, the joy of a baby, the worry over a baby, and the feelings of sadness when a woman’s fertility window closes with no baby in sight. The risks and burden of reproduction seem to fall unfairly on women who face the challenges of survival with children in tow, and sometimes have to make heart-breaking decisions. This isn’t new. Our cave-women ancestors also faced harsh environments -- a famine a millennium ago has become a recession and job loss today. 

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277
*We are currently seeking men and women who have stories, confessions, explanations or concerns about use of pornography. 
Apr 17, 2019
Introducing: Committed Season 2
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We’re back, baby! On April 11th, the Committed podcast is coming back for Season Two. Get ready to believe in love all over again as host Jo Piazza interviews couples navigating the good, the bad, the messy, the wonderful and sometimes the hilarious —-often all in the same story. As she did in season one, Piazza will cover an array of poignant and timely topics such as coping with a spouse stricken with a sudden illness, an engagement put in limbo because of immigration status, watching a husband transition to a new gender, processing the news that a newborn baby is diagnosed with a terminally ill disease, adjusting to marrying a famous person, coping with sex addiction, navigating marriage in a brothel and more.
Apr 11, 2019
Mothers, MILF's & Wives - Part 1
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Motherhood is tricky. That's because motherhood is all about sacrifices and...worry. They worry about health, shelter, nutrition, education, and money. Despite this, about 80% of women become mothers one way or another, and most of the others are mothers to the village. Women have long had plenty of reproductive choices - if they have a baby, when they have a baby, with whom they have a baby, whether that baby will survive, and whether they’ll care for their own or others. If you’re a woman, there are plenty of ways to keep your genes in evolution’s chain or raise the species as a whole. 

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277



Apr 10, 2019
Mating Messages of Status and Sexuality
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Mating Matters has busted out a new message line for people to ask questions and tell stories. While we're super busy producing more episodes for you, we thought we could cover some other territory in the meantime. On this BONUS episode, Dr. Wendy focuses on two interesting calls she has received - one about how a short man can raise his dating status in this new world of trigger swiping dating apps; the other from a woman who got married young to a man she loves deeply, but has never been sexually attracted to. After ten years of marriage, they decided to switch to a poly amorous relationship. Tricky? Perhaps, but her actual question, though, may surprise you.

Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277
Apr 03, 2019
BONUS: Evolution's Hard Truth
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Evolution's Hard Truth addresses the fact that "survival of the fittest" can be a tough pill to swallow. About 10% of men never mate and about 18% of women never reproduce. Human mating is an inside job. though, and there are things you can do to make sure you find yourself a mate, if you want one. Dr. Wendy gives some tips on how we can win the mating game by raising our mate status and focusing on things we CAN control. No, you do not need to be rich and great looking, but you do need to get yourself in shape - inside and out - to be the person another person wants to be with. Use your single time to do important personal work so you're ready when someone special comes along.

Mating Matters also has a brand new message line! Call 323-207-8277 to ask Dr. Wendy a question, share your thoughts or tell us a story. We may include your voice on one of our episodes. Please know that by leaving the message you are giving us permission to use it.
Mar 27, 2019
Survival of the Gayest
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Ever wonder why same-sex behavior evolved in our species? If we are wired to reproduce, being gay - and theoretically not reproducing - seems like a sure fire way for our species to struggle to exist. For the record, at this point in our evolution, humans still need an egg, sperm and a womb to reproduce. So how have people who may not reproduce stay in our gene pool? Historically, same-sex behavior actually has increased chances for survival. And did you realize heterosexual people have a  secret advantage if they have a gay brother or sister? Mother Nature is a perfect planner. And survival of the fittest might also mean survival of the gayest. 
Mar 20, 2019
Sexy Money
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In this episode of Matting Matters Dr. Wendy explores how the pursuit of money is really pursuit of sex for men, and why it works in reverse for women; why some singles pay more for sexual opportunity than they do for rent; why prostitution rates rise when women are disadvantaged, and why the price of sex drops drastically when women rise in economic power! No matter how you reckon it, sex costs.
Mar 13, 2019
What is Love?
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Art imitates life. The science of falling in love involves biological, social and psychological mechanisms. Dr. Wendy breaks down the underpinnings of everyone’s favorite drug - love -using vibrant examples from your favorite movies. 
Mar 06, 2019
Dating App-athy
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How dating apps can change your brain and bio-hack your evolutionary programming…unless you use them correctly.
Feb 27, 2019
The God Who Clubs
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Religions created rules around dating, mating and procreating to increase reproduction and membership. If you don't know someone, but you know they share the same religion, or tribe, there is almost instant trust. Hint: the more punitive the God, the faster a religion grows. 
Feb 21, 2019
The Trouble with Testosterone
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How this hormone can affect a man’s ability to fall in love, and, in high testosterone men, increase death rates. Why we evolved to have some low testosterone men even while the pharmaceutical industry has turned it into a diagnosis.
Feb 07, 2019
Hidden Eggs (Ep.1)
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Concealed fertility in humans has contributed to the sexual double standard, good dads, and strippers who make more money when they ovulate. 






Feb 07, 2019