Shat the Movies: 80's & 90's Best Film Review

By Shat on Entertainment

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Reviews: 1

Cory
 May 15, 2019
These guys never fail to make me laugh.

Description

What are the The Best 1980s & 1990s Movies? Do you find yourself asking if the movies we loved while growing up were really that good? Have you caught yourself thinking, “why don’t make movies like they use to?” Can you still remember spending your Friday Nights searching for the perfect movie rental at Blockbuster Video? Do you know what Blockbuster Video is? If you answered yes, then this is the podcast for you! Website: http://shatthemovies.com/the-best-80s-90s-movies/ Email: hosts@shatthemovies.com

Episode Date
The Boondock Saints (1999)
01:14:40

"The Boondock Saints" went from the hottest script in Hollywood to a pathetic five-theater release, to one of the biggest cult classics of the late '90s. But does Troy Duffy's underground hit film live up to all the hype, or was it just a weird byproduct of an edgy era? 

Listener Jim L. from London wired some money across the pond to commission this shoot-em-up episode of Shat The Movies, exposing Big D to his first taste of The Saints in action.

Did you know Duffy originally wanted Mark Wahlberg, Kenneth Branagh, and even Robert De Niro in this movie? Gene did. Did you know there's some lovely side dick? Rog did. Did you know "The Boondock Saints" paved the way for "John Wick" to be made? It's not a fact, but Gene's pretty sure of it.

Also explore whether "The Boondock Saints" is loosely based on Kevin Smith's "Dogma," what constitutes telegraphing homosexuality, and Duffy's surprisingly artistic use of slow motion.

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Sep 16, 2019
Kindergarten Cop (1990)
01:03:06

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "I'd like some parenting advice from three male podcasters stuck in the '90s?" If you answered yes, then this is the podcast for you.

Listener Stephanie commissioned "Kindergarten Cop," the ninth Arnold Schwarzenegger title featured on "Shat The Movies" and a perfect portrait of Arnold's awkward shift from action to comedy.

Be there for Arnold's first passionate on-screen kiss, learn the difference between parrots and ferrets, find our why Roger Roeper doesn't want kids, and explore possible ties between "Kindergarten Cop" and the Third Reich.

If that isn't enough for you, the Shat boys also surface Gene's and Big D's fighting days, advise on how to escape killer ex-husbands, and obsess over Schwarzenegger's pube-like facial hair.

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Sep 10, 2019
The Cable Guy (1996)
01:11:37

With Big D visiting Gene and Roger in Arizona, this week's "Shat The Movies" keyword is "friendship." And what better movie to exemplify friendship than Jim Carrey's smash '90s hit?

No, not "Dumb and Dumber" (which actually won in listener voting), but "The Cable Guy," a movie Roger Roeper can quote start to finish and Gene Lyons never had seen. 

We called an audible this week, actually visited Medieval Times in Scottsdale, Ariz., and immediately recorded this candid review of a dark comedy largely unappreciated in its time. 

"The Cable Guy" really caught out attention and unearthed some hot topics, including the ethics of hiring sex workers, the dynamics of one-sided friendships, the genius of Ben Stiller and Judd Apatow, the magic of stolen cable, Big D's dream party, Jim Carrey's gigantic paycheck, multilayered gags, false accusations, and a possible darker side to Carrey's character, Chip Douglas.

Oh, and we're still going to do "Dumb and Dumber." This podcast isn't a dictatorship.

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Sep 03, 2019
Dogma (1999)
01:20:30

"Shat The Movies" celebrates 127 successful episodes of lighthearted banter about silly movies by reviewing a 1999 Kevin Smith hit that was labeled "blasphemy" by the Catholic League and bore its own warning label for offensiveness: It's "Dogma,' y'all.

Listener John U. from Minnesota commissioned this controversial comedy, and really he got two movies for the price of one. In one movie, John got an all-star cast including Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, George Carlin, and Alan Rickman. In the other movie, he got pathetic attempts at acting by Chris Rock, Salma Hayek, and Smith. 

Roger Roeper tries to convince Gene and Big D that Smith is to comedy what Tarantino is to action dramas. Big D tells tales from anti-masturbation men's groups. Gene rails against schoolgirl outfits for strippers. And Kevin Smith tries to cram every idea he's ever had into 120 minutes of film.

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Aug 26, 2019
The Karate Kid (1984)
01:16:51

In Part 2 of our Wondertwins co-commission, younger brother Josh dedicates "The Karate Kid" to big brother Adam. And the Shat Crew gets crazy nostalgic over this 1984 martial arts father-son romance. Gene predictably brings his three decades of martial arts experience to the table, while Roger explores the darker side of Mr. Miyagi's hermit status, Daniel's mischief, and Daniel's mom's conspicuously optimistic behavior.

"The Karate Kid" stands up as a timeless classic, but we noticed a few things we missed as kids: a lackluster score from a legendary composer, hints of racism and sexism, an abundance of soccer, missed food gags, and a real question of who ultimately was the aggressor in the standoff between the bully Johnny and the rebel Daniel. Also, did you know Ralph Macchio was 22 YEARS OLD when this was filmed? Changes the whole movie.

Regardless of whether you loved it or hated it, "The Karate Kid" was long overdue. Strike first. Strike hard. No Mercy.

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Aug 15, 2019
Bad Boys (1995)
01:07:38

What do you buy your twin for his birthday? A "Shat The Movies" review! What does he buy you? The same. Because, y'know, twins.

This week's commission, coming from listener Adam for his brother Josh, is Michael Bay's directorial debut and a '90s action-comedy that confused the hell out of Roger Roeper. 

"Bad Boys" is a little too bloody to be a pure comedy. And it's a little too farcical to be a serious cop drama. Instead, you have a movie that touched off a franchise and propelled Martin Lawrence and Will Smith to movie stardom. 

Big D rails at the shoddy police work and asks the Shat Crew whether they'd steal from a crime scene. Gene drools over Will Smith and hails Martin Lawrence as a comedic genius, and Rog rewrites the movie to make it darker, more violent, and more mysterious. 

Also in this "Shat The Movies" episode:

  • Michael Bay's music video background
  • Martin Lawrence's TV career and meltdown
  • Roger's whiteness and/or inability to remember names
  • Explosions. So many explosions.

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Aug 09, 2019
From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)
01:20:59

Roger Roeper labeled "From Dusk Till Dawn" a tale of two movies, and he couldn't be more correct. Robert Rodriguez directing and Quentin Tarantino writing always equals something special, but is it a gritty shoot-em-up or a campy gorefest? And can a movie successfully be both?

"From Dusk Till Dawn" was commissioned by listener Christian Di Leo and stars an impressive cast include George Clooney in his first starring Hollywood role, Cheech Marin in three different roles, Harvey Keitel, Juliette Lewis, Danny Trejo, Salma Hayek, and Tarantino himself.

Big D quizzes Gene Lyons on vampire killing techniques. Rog connects "From Dusk Till Dawn" with "The Walking Dead," and all three explore the sexual depravity and background behind Salma Hayek's iconic snake dance.

Also, PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY!

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Aug 02, 2019
Galaxy Quest (1999)
01:21:03

This week, we bid happy retirement to a listener to got the shaft from his employer, then realized he already had enough money to retire. Rob P. has been a longtime listener of both Shat on TV and Shat The Movies, and his film commission is nothing short of stellar.

Boldly going where no Shatter has gone before, Rob chose a movie released in the final week of the '90s. And though "Galaxy Quest" never broke the top 5 in the box office, it might be the greatest sci-fi parody of all time.

Gene Lyons, Roger Roeper, and Dick Ebert break down the difference between Trekkies and Trekkers, celebrate Galaxy Quest's outstanding casting, and contemplate the proper approach to sex with aliens.

Rog and Gene also swap tales from Comic-Con, with Gene recounting how he stole from Lou Ferrigno and Rog worshipping Alec Baldwin's blue-collar roots. 

And, of course, we had to imitate Thermians and talk about boobs. Because we're adults.

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Jul 24, 2019
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (1989)
01:18:35

This week's Shat The Movies category is Roger's Favorite Movies, and the listeners overwhelmingly chose "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure," a film that gave us the opportunity to discuss Gene's music career, Big D's dislike of Southern California slang, and how a lack of dance moves cost Roger the most wanted job at Universal Studios.

Learn about "Bill & Ted's" shoestring budget and imperiled past while the Shat Crew discovers cock rock, scoffs at time travel paradoxes, and worships George Carlin. Things get dicey when Dick recalls history reports in elementary school and Roger reveals how his family stole prime farmland in Alabama.

And of course the podcast covers Napoleon, Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, and all the historical figures kidnapped by Bill and Ted.

Party on, dudes!

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Jul 18, 2019
Escape from New York (1981)
01:16:40

Two dystopian American films from the '80s are huge in Norway: "Blade Runner" and "Escape from New York." We shat all over the former, so Norwegian listener Per T. commissioned the latter.

If you think the Shat The Movies crew doesn't know much about covert missions into futuristic prison islands, think again. Big D brings his military experience, landmine expertise, and New York roots. Gene Lyons explains how to defeat giant wrestlers swinging baseball bats. And Roger Roeper sees his father in every Kurt Russell character.

Other topics on this podcast include:

  • Why Manhattan makes for an awful detention facility
  • Snake Plissken's "buttrock commando" armament
  • What Roger thought that Snake's tattoo was
  • Wives on set
  • Comically oversized gadgets
  • What The Crazies live underground
  • Godawful foley work
  • and U.S. soccer veteran Michael Bradley's short legs

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Jul 10, 2019
The Sandlot (1993)
01:08:59

Shat The Movies listener Valorie commissioned "The Sandlot" thinking she would get a podcast about the 1993 coming-of-age baseball classic.

Instead, she got a curveball with a little mustard on it as hosts Roger Roeper and Dick Ebert retell their glorious softball history that spans from Singaporean caning to Big D's dribblers to the plate. 

Meanwhile, Gene Lyons goes full Social Justice Warrior as he decries Squints' devious assault on Wendy Peffercorn and laments the incomprehensibly cruel treatment of The Beast.

This episode of Shat The Movies also covers when to call your stepdad "dad," whether a man should have to endure his replacement touching his dog, Major League segregation, nicotine gum pranks, and who should have been cast instead of James Earl Jones.

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Jul 03, 2019
Videodrome (1983)
01:17:11

The story behind this week's commissioned film review could be a movie of its own: The loving wife of a northern England postman secretly saves the money to hire three misfit Americans to surprise him with a podcast about one of his favorite flicks. But what she doesn't tell them is watching "Videodrome" will cause unexpected changes in their minds and bodies!

Dick Ebert immediately begins have strange nightmares. Roger Roeper begins seeing political conspiracies. And Gene Lyons feels the sudden need for sadomasochistic context to achieve an erection.

What else would you expect from a David Cronenberg cult classic starring a young James Woods and a surprisingly gripping performance from Blondie vocalist Deborah Harry.

Big thanks to Shat The Movies listeners Jo and Jim for choosing a movie we had never seen and certainly won't be able to forget.

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Jun 27, 2019
Demolition Man (1993)
01:10:05

Why would anyone pay us to review a 1993 action-comedy starring an aging Sylvester Stallone and over-the-top Wesley Snipes? Because it's incredibly easy to watch and superbly entertaining.

"Demolition Man" is a '90s action movie with '80s action movie in its DNA. It might even be that last true '80s action movie, packed with one-liners and inexplicable explosions. Plus VR sex, Taco Bell, and shot after shot of Stallone slow-motion diving with guns blazing.

Things get weird this week as the original Shat The Movies trio--Roger, Dick, and Gene-- dive deep into cryprison vs. regular prison, hostage raid tactics, foreplay, a world without murder, Sandra Bullock's Sandraness, and the world's worst movie soundtrack.

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Jun 20, 2019
The Princess Bride (1987)
01:03:57

How have we gone more than 100 movies without reviewing "The Princess Bride?" It's a travesty of justice, one that Shat The Movies listener Adam R. decided to correct with his generous commission.

Is it a comedy? Is it a romance? Is it an action film, or a fantasy tale? The answer is yes. "The Princess Bride" is all of these things in an infinitely quotable and absolutely unforgettable package. 

In this episode, we discuss whether '80s video games were better than today's, why Rob Reiner would hire an actor whose speech he couldn't understand, and how "The Princess Bride" somehow looked better than "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" on a fraction of the budget.

Gene explains why the film's politeness sets it apart from other '80s greats. Dick tells the tale of how Billy Crystal and Carol Kane were robbed of even better-improvised scenes, and Roger argues that no other movie has as many stellar performances by as many brilliant actors.

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Jun 14, 2019
Robocop (1987)
01:12:27

The original Shat The Movies trio is back! Roger Roeper joins Dick Ebert and Gene Lyons to review the dystopian Detroit crime classic "Robocop." Like most Paul Verhoeven movies, "Robocop" has spoof commercials, gratuitous violence, and co-ed shower scenes. But this 1987 relief carries the distinct honor of being the Dutch director's most coherent blend of action and satire. And it's oh-so-quotable.

If you've ever wondered what was on the X-rated version, why ED-209 was so violent, or whether Officer Lewis had the hots for Officer Murphy, this is the podcast for you. If you ever wanted to know the connection between Robocop and Abraham Lincoln, this is the podcast for you. And if you donated to build a 10-foot bronze statue of Robocop in Detroit, this most definitely is the podcast for you.

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Jun 03, 2019
Point Break (1991) Encore Presentation
01:19:05

Keanu Reeves' pro-pooch, mega-violent action trilogy is complete with this week's release of "John Wick Chapter 3: Parabellum," and we'd love to review it for you. But our VHS collections only go so far as 1999. What a lot of people don't know is that before there was John Wick 3, there was John Wick 2. And before that, Keanu Reeves starred a little movie called John Wick.

But years before John Wick's 2014 release, we could already sense Keanu Reeves had action movies in his blood. There was "The Matrix," which we've covered. And Johnny Mnemonic, which sucked shit. And "Speed 2," which he wasn't in.

None of those was worthy of our Best of Shat The Movies collection. Only one film brought together all the amazing elements of '90s action, sexy surf bodies, dead presidents, surprisingly affordable food, and the incomparable Patrick Swayze.

Today, we present to you the 1991 homage to extreme sports and reckless gunplay: Point Break.

Thanks so much for listening, and we can't wait to be back with you. Enjoy the show.

.

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May 19, 2019
Back to The Future (1985) Encore Presentation
01:14:22

This week, our Best Of series takes us back in time to review one of the rare movies Roger Roeper, Dick Ebert, and I all agreed on: "Back to The Future."

If you recently saw "Avengers: Endgame," you know "Back to The Future" is utter bullshit. And if you haven't seen "Back to The Future," you really should. It's an '80s classic that eerily doesn't age, and we think our dissection of it ranks among the best of our 100+ film reviews.

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May 09, 2019
Conan The Barbarian (1982) Encore Presentation
01:11:03

In honor of the Battle of Winterfell, we're proud to present our recap of a movie that shows some real military tactics, including how to infiltrate a cult, how to fight a giant serpent, how to burn a witch, and how to solve the Riddle of Steel.

"Conan The Barbarian" is a special moment in Shat The Movies history. It's one of Dick Ebert's shining moments and the episode that made Kerri Gross realize she loves Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. Out of more than 100 Shat The Movies episodes, this truly is among the funniest.

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May 02, 2019
Road House (1989) Encore Presentation
01:35:08

“Road House” invented the good bad movie. But was it actually any good? Patrick Swayze was charming but grossly undersized. The script was quotable but largely nonsense. And did you know Road House is two words?

Whether you relished Sam Elliot’s smooth bass and glorious mane or cringed at the ridiculousness of tearing out throats, one thing is for sure: the boobs, butts, and bar fights were pure ‘80s.

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Apr 25, 2019
Predator 2 (1990) Encore Presentation
01:20:07

Predator rocked the barrier between action and sci-fi when Arnold Schwarzenegger battled a new kind of enemy in 1987. This isn't that movie. On its face, taking the thrilling Predator formula and applying it to an urban setting makes for a good movie. Throw in big names like Danny Glover, Bill Paxton, and Gary Busey, and you should have a blockbuster. So how did 1990's Predator 2 fail? We'll tell you how!


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Apr 19, 2019
King Ralph (1991)
57:27

When the royal family is accidentally killed, the heir to the throne proves to be a loutish American named Ralph Jones (John Goodman). Overnight, Ralph goes from sleazy Las Vegas lounge singer to King of England, and it's royal secretary Cedric Willingham's (Peter O'Toole) job to try to civilize him. But it's not easy weaning Ralph off of fast food, and even harder keeping him away from a kindly stripper (Camille Coduri). Meanwhile, the next would-be heir (John Hurt) plots Ralph's demise. 

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Apr 13, 2019
Pee-wee's Big Adventure (1985)
01:01:58

Kerri Gross prayed for it, and listener CarmelitaValdezMcKoy answered. We’re reviewing the 1985 oddity “Pee-wee’s Big Adventure.”

This groundbreaking movie made Paul Reubens a star, put Tim Burton on the map, and was the first time Oingo Boingo's Danny Elfman worked with Burton on an irresistible film score.

Gene Lyons argues “Pee-wee’s Big Adventure” is the most memorable movie of all time. Who could forget Pee-wee’s legendary bike, Large Marge, Dee Snyder, the singing hobo, the pet shop, or the fact Jimmy Smits was not in this movie?

The Shat Crew touches on Pee-wee’s adult-theater arrest, the failure of Pee-wee sequels, and whether hitch hiking is an Out West thing or a Florida thing.

Kerri recalls seeing Pee-wee live while sitting between Andy Dick and Corey Feldman. Dick Ebert asks how this film is so funny when it shouldn’t be. And Gene applauds Pee-wee’s glorious ensemble ending. 

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Apr 03, 2019
The Natural (1984)
01:06:17

“The Natural” belongs in any debate over the best sports movie ever. It has Robert Redford in his prime, a stunning Kim Basinger, huffy Wilford Brimley, sly Robert Duvall, powerful Glenn Close, and even a young Michael Madsen. They’re all delivering top-notch performances on a picture-perfect backdrop that feels really real for an ‘80s movie.

Shat The Movies listener Vince commissioned this baseball classic just as hosts Dick Ebert and Drew Zakmin are gearing up for Opening Day. It’s full of iconic scenes that bring us all back to our playing days, when we imagined each of us could swing his own Wonderboy bat and be the greatest that ever played the game.

Everything ages, and “The Natural” aged surprisingly well, but not everything was a home run. Redford is 46 and playing a 19-year-old. His character, Roy Hobbs, seems to leave a trail of death wherever he goes. And the final inning is cornier than a Nebraska farm.

In this episode, you’ll also hear our list of the worst sports-movie actors of all time, find out how a young Big D would get pumped up for high school games, and learn why your mom got a care package from Derek Jeter.

One Headlight 90s Podcast By Drew Zakmin (iTunes) : http://bit.ly/2tTzG04

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Mar 28, 2019
Total Recall (1990)
01:11:48

The most expensive film of its day, "Total Recall" took Arnold Schwarzenegger's career to new heights by adding star power like Sharon Stone, technological wonders like full body scanners, and philosophical questions about the nature of reality.

This 1990 sci-fi rollercoaster didn't sacrifice any of the Schwarzenegger charm. We still get the punchlines, the over-the-top action, the gratuitous use of meat shields, and the "Conan The Barbarian" theme song. No, seriously, check it out. That shit is stolen.

The Shat Crew has the expected debate over whether Quaid's adventures are all implanted memories or a rude awakening. Big D reveals he'd trade a virtual vacation for a virtual babysitter. Kerri Gross just wants virtual sleep. And guest host Drew Zakmin admits to forgetting the names of his friends' children. 

Do the three hosts recall Kuato and the three-boobed woman? Totally.

One Headlight 90s Podcast By Drew Zakmin (iTunes) : http://bit.ly/2tTzG04

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Mar 22, 2019
Toy Story (1995)
01:11:20

"Toy Story" won the Best of Disney category, and it's easy to see why this Pixar powerhouse spawned an entire franchise. The characters are unforgettable, the attention to detail is unrivaled, and the voice talent is unbeatable. 

This episode is all about Dick Ebert. One second he's perving out over The Little Mermaid, the next he's impersonating Randy Newman. Big D even brought a special guest along for this '90s movie review: Drew Zakmin, of the One Headlight podcast. 

Gene Lyons joins them to discuss their favorite childhood toys, the dark side of Woody the Cowboy, Ram Man, Fisto, and parallels between "Toy Story" and its less-popular contemporary "The Christmas Story."

Warning: Do not look directly at Baby Molly's face at any point during "Toy Story." It's like a less terrifying Momo.

One Headlight 90s Podcast By Drew Zakmin (iTunes) : http://bit.ly/2tTzG04

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Mar 14, 2019
Dune (1984)
01:08:31

No ‘80s movie podcast featuring Kerri Gross would be complete without covering David Lynch’s sci-fi epic “Dune.” But after more than 100 episodes, Shat The Movies couldn’t seem to make it happen.

In walked listener Greg R. Last year, he wowed us all by commissioning “Rounders” for a Shat review. This time, Greg thought it would be hilarious to saddle us with a movie he simply doesn’t get.

We knew Kerri would love it. We knew Gene would groan. And we knew Big D would stumble over every name in the film.

What we’d forgotten in the years since watching “Dune” was the breathtaking outfits, the inventive technology, and the sheer magnitude of the sand worms. And those were overshadowed by the ridiculously bad combat, the utterly incomprehensible plot, and the persistent whispering of obvious internal monologue.

Dune takes itself very seriously, which makes it even more hilarious. In the midst of galactic warfare between Houses, Gene cheers for Baron Harkonnen. Big D sees sex slaves everywhere, and Kerri Gross connects the dots between “Dune” and Iraq while finding her inner Muad’Dib.

We’re all milking cats in the top floor of the Crazy Town Penthouse. So yank your heart plug and fire up your Weirding Module, Arrakis, here we come!

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Mar 08, 2019
Crimson Tide (1995)
01:12:41

When an Army veteran and a nurse who knows nothing about the military review a '90s submarine movie, you know it's going to be crazy. Throw in Roger Roeper's tales of babysitting in an alligator costume, and it's full-on insane.

Listener Rod Phillips paid Shat The Movies good money to cover "Crimson Tide" as a birthday gift to himself. And his choice wound up being one of the funniest podcasts we've ever done.

Kerri wonders how missiles work, Big D dabbles in sailorspeak, and Roger examines which is creepier: magicians or clowns. The Shat Crew celebrates the stellar cast of Denzel Washington, Gene Hackman, Viggo Mortensen, James Gandolfini, Steve Zahn, Ryan Phillippe, and ... Richy Schroder?

Kerri bemoans low standards in the military and medical fields. Big D steals the show by explaining the horrors of dying in a sinking sub, shaming fat sailors, and demonstrating he's downright ruthless when it comes to the Trolley Dilemma. And nuke-spooked Roger wishes he were watching "Top Gun."

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Feb 27, 2019
Back to The Future Part II (1989)
01:19:04

Most sequels give us more of the same. "Back to The Future Part II" changed the game by giving us a world we'd never seen: hoverboards, Pac-Fax, VistaGlide, and filming two sequels back-to-back with cross-promotion embedded in the movie.

But bigger isn't always better. Losing "Back to the Future" stars Crispin Glover and Claudia Wells made some scenes awkward and (with the help of prosthetics) borderline creepy. And why does every 40-year-old in this movie sound like she's 70?

The time travel gets a little sloppy, but we learn a lot about the Shat The Movies crew when it comes to bending the laws of physics. Big D fears losing his daughter to the Butterfly Effect. Roger Roeper believes he'd become Batman, and Kerri Gross just needs some help with her taxes and investments.

Also in this episode:

  • The dark alternate ending where Lorraine kills Biff
  • Roger drools over "Rick and Morty"
  • A soundtrack surprise
  • the Great Hoverboard Hoax
  • Thomas F. Wilson is the real hero of the franchise
  • Doc Brown is a massive hypocrite
  • How the DeLorean was refurbished after years of theft
  • The Shat The Movies crew give their 18-year-old selves life advice.

So strap on your eyebrows, Shat fans, for this early morning recording of "Back to The Future Part II!"

Doc And Mharti (Rick and Morty Original Video) https://vimeo.com/97680161

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Feb 21, 2019
License to Drive (1988)
01:18:24

How much Corey is too much Corey? Between Corey Haim's mouth breathing and Corey Feldman's avalanche of bombing jokes, we'd say "License to Drive" answers that question emphatically. 

The Shat Crew expected corny '80s jokes, cheese car stunts, and loads of questionable fashion. But we had no idea "License to Drive" would lead us to tales of severed feet, an Nabokovian hot Heather Graham, and an alternate universe where Gene Lyons laughs at on-screen burps, Roger Roeper mistakenly believe The Fresh Prince's Uncle Phil died of AIDS, and Dick Ebert wishes death upon young and old alike.

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Feb 15, 2019
Safe Men (1998)
01:09:20

When "Shat The Movies" listener Lucas discovered we wouldn't be doing a Best of Jewish Mob Movies category, he took matters into his own hands. Equipped with $300 and a brilliantly composed email, Lucas convinced Big D we needed to cover the 1998 sleeper "Safe Men."

We were amazed to discover one of the strangest films we've witnessed. The cast is good: Sam Rockwell, Steve Zahn, Paul Giamatti, Mark Ruffalo, Harvey Fierstein, Peter Dinklage. The script is reasonable. But there's just something odd about this movie that created a rollercoaster of a conversation among Dick Ebert, Roger Roeper, and Kerri Gross.

Learn what each of your Shat The Movies hosts like to do while drunk at 2 a.m., what it's like to hang at the VFW hall while elderly women wait to devour your Marine father's wedding potluck, and how Big D talked Roger out of pursuing a career as a professional event DJ.

The gang also discusses the greatest Sega game of all time, Roger's improv comedy past, and the fact Dick Ebert was a melodious Hasidic man in his past life. Mazel tov!

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Feb 07, 2019
Predator (1987)
01:18:10

It's our 100th movie review! And we've been saving one very special movie for this massive milestone. Tear off your shirt, flex your freedom, and GET TO THE CHOPPAH! It's "Predator" time.

Let's go back to 1987, when Schwarzenegger was Apex Arnold, military tactics meant nothing in movies, on-set cocaine binges were an daily occurrence, and Jesse Ventura yelled things no governor would dream of saying.

Discover Gene Lyons' obsession with WWE wrestling, Roger Roeper's obsession with telling everyone they just said what he was about to say, and Billy Duke's obsession with sweating a lot.

Did you know Jean-Claude Van Damme was the original alien in "Predator"? Big D tells about how the Muscles for Brussels tried to turn the Predator into a kickboxer from out of space and why Van Damme told film executives to kiss his balls.

Learn more than you ever wanted to about mini-guns, jungle recon, and thermal imaging. And hear about how Sonny Landham was assigned a bodyguard to protect the natives he encountered.

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Feb 01, 2019
Weekend at Bernie's (1989)
01:15:38

Listener Christian commissioned this '80s classic as a tribute to Shat The Movies host Roger Roeper, and Rog defends it against criticism from Big D and Kerri Gross.

Find out what a 2003 Pizza Hut promotion had to do with this 1989 comedy and how much mustaches confuse Kerri. We also cover Big D's Caribbean party life, how hot New York actually gets, and what actually happens to a body after death.

Roger lies about lying to get laid. Big D explains the aphrodesiacal properties of boats. And Kerri reveals that nurses like to play a little game called How Would You Kill Somebody And Not Get Caught?

Plus, you'll get a questionable history of voodoo, learn how the Shat gang will honor Gene when he dies, and receive an invitation to St. Elmo's Party. See you on the beach!

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Jan 24, 2019
The Burbs (1989)
58:18

Big D thought we should do a Best of Rick Ducommun, and you're probably wondering who that is. You're not alone.

Ducommun was in "Spaceballs," "The Last Boy Scout," "Die Hard," "Groundhog Day," and dozens of other '80s and '90s classics. You might say he's Mr. Shat The Movies, and Big D is a big fan. 

So it's only fitting that Dick Ebert pop his Shat The Movies hosting cherry by guiding us through the 1989 classic "The Burbs," best known for another actor you might have heard of: Tom Hanks.

Kerri Gross and The King Bee join Big D in discussing nipple hunting on cable TV, "The Burbs" connection to "The Silence of The Lambs," what the hell Corey Feldman is doing in this movie, Tom Hanks' disagreeable side, and how to be an awful neighbor.

Also, learn what Kerri wears when she prowls her block as the Goth Avenger. And Big D pulls off another uncanny celebrity impersonation.

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Jan 17, 2019
The Crow (1994)
57:39

"The Crow" isn't the greatest movie of the '90s. It's not even the best movie of 1994. But for a lot of thirty-somethings, this movie was a huge part of adolescence. But Shat The Movies has passed it over again and again.

Well, listener Joshua decided that's some bullshit and decided to FIRE IT UP.

Shat The Movies resident goths Gene Lyons and Kerri Gross join misanthrope King Bee to examine Brandon Lee's mysterious death, a cursed movie set, the difference between a crow and a raven, and the miracles of rent in downtown Detroit.

The King Bee asks whether Frank Miller's "Sin City" influenced the hypersaturated, gritty look and feel "The Crow." Kerri evaluates costuming and mysticism. And, in the course of it all, Gene somehow turns into a Crow apologist.

This one goes out to Joshua and his wife. If "The Crow" did nothing else, it brought two little lovebirds together.

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Jan 10, 2019
WarGames (1983)
01:22:11

"WarGames" changed the way '80s kids looked at video games, computers, and the threat of nuclear annihilation. But in the age of smartphones and wireless Internet, does this 1983 geek-gasm still hold up?

The original Shat The Movies threesome teams up on this episode to discuss Matthew Broderick's charm, a hotter Ally Sheedy, the difference between code names and acronyms, and drug use among Missile Command personnel.

Gene Lyons gives a history lesson on the 1980 Titan missile disaster, and Roger Roeper goes full Q Anon with his theory that the WOPR supercomputer really was the mind of a sadistic son who felt neglected by his creator. 

Big D reveals that he might have forgotten he grew up rich, and we debut our new segment: Shat on Workplace Safety.

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Jan 03, 2019
Jingle All The Way (1996)
01:20:55

"Jingle All The Way" marked the end of two distinct cinematic eras: Arnold Schwarzenegger's string of comedies and Sinbad's film career. But was it really hot garbage, or does this quirky Christmas satire have some lasting laughs to offer? Big D needed two viewings to decide.

This movie led to a lot of surprisingly spirited Shat The Movies debates, including:

  • Should parents attend their children's sporting events?
  • Was "Jingle All The Way" secretly an homage to "Raiders of The Lost Ark"?
  • Is this movie pro-divorce?
  • Why does everyone hate Booster?
  • Would "Jingle All The Way" be better with Tim Allen and Joe Pesci?

Gene, Roger, and Big D also discuss deja vu, blackouts, sleeping with married women, the '80s trend of must-have toys, the proper order of martial arts belts, and how Gene scammed Service Merchandise out of business.

Big D points out why you shouldn't film a Christmas movie in the spring, and Roger gives a little history lesson on how George Lucas could have avoided a "Star Wars" disaster by just watching Jake Lloyd's performance in "Jingle All The Way."

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Dec 24, 2018
Edward Scissorhands (1990)
01:13:43

Many people forget "Edward Scissorhands" is a Christmas movie. Well, at least it's a movie with Christmas in it. Or is it simply snow? Actually, it's just shave ice. But whatever, it's Christmastime in Shatland, and we're doing the damn thing.

Tim Burton's career has been long and flirted with Christmas several times, but few of his movies came close to achieving the magic he bottled up with "Edward Scissorhands." 

It made us laugh with the waterbed scene, cry with the sculpture scene, and marvel at a cast that included Winona Ryder with a heart of gold, Alan Arkin as a loving dad, Dianne Wiest as an angel on earth, Vincent Price in his final role, Anthony Michael Hall as a bully, and of course Johnny Depp.

Gene Lyons and Kerri Gross naturally gushed over this movie, but "Edward Scissorhands" lost a few point with Big D, who loved it as a kid. Where some saw an inventive near-silent performance from Depp, Big D saw an easy acting job. Where some saw Tim Burton at the top of his game, Big D saw the adolescent angst of a suburban guy pandering to counter-culture.

Also on this edition of "Shat The Movies":

  • Was the finale a perfectly dark fairy tale ending or a silly wrap-up with no lessons learned?
  • What's more important: etiquette or hand-marking
  • and Big D's Parable of The Mountain Lion.

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Dec 19, 2018
Good Will Hunting (1997)
01:16:50

"Good Will Hunting" won the Best of Matt Damon category among Shat The Movies, and we can see why. Damon didn't just star in the movie, he co-wrote it with Ben Affleck when the two were just a couple of fresh-faced actors.

This ode to Boston showed us Robin Williams' dramatic side, which we later realized was tragic foreshadowing, and it introduced us to a young Casey Affleck before his sexual harassment scandal.

To Kerri Gross, "Good Will Hunting" is a moving emotional journey. To Dick Ebert, it's the greatest film Shat The Movies has ever reviewed. To Gene Lyons, it's a brilliant collection of improvised scenes that he predictably wishes were darker.

Other topics covered in this episode of Shat The Movies:

  • Minnie Driver's gigantic Lego head
  • Harvey Weinstein's keen eye for gay scenes
  • Matt Damon's idiot ex-girlfriend and her taste in metal drummers
  • Gene's failure to ever love the way Kerri can
  • the best crying scenes in '90s cinema
  • Elliot's Smith's crushing soundtrack
  • Big D's belief in bootstraps
  • Kerri's happy ending
  • and why Gene can't get a job with the NSA.

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Dec 14, 2018
Groundhog Day (1993)
01:15:57

"Groundhog Day" is the rare movie that became more important than the holiday that inspired it. Many believe it's Bill Murray's greatest work, and Shat The Movies listener Greg has watched it again, and again, and again, and again.

There's always something new to discover in this '90s classic movie, even if you've seen it hundreds of times -- like the fact Phil Connors could be a sexual predator.

In this episode of Shat The Movies:

  • the guys debate whether Andie MacDowell is hot
  • Big D reveals how "Groundhog Day" was inspired by "Interview With A Vampire"
  • Roger reveals all the dark things Big D would do if there were no consequences and ponders which Shat host looks at himself in the mirror the most
  • Airbnbs are pitted against conventional bed and breakfasts (gross) and hotels (not as gross)
  • Gene revels in the casting of Chris Elliot and the fat guy from "Herman's Head"
  • Big D wonders what the hell "Herman's Head" was

So put on your winter clothes and meet us in Punxsutawney, it's time to do the Pennsylvania Polka!

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Dec 06, 2018
The Last Boy Scout (1991)
01:11:10

"The Last Boy Scout" is a movie by dirt bags for dirt bags. Producer Joel Silver is a dirt bag who cast his girlfriend as a topless chick in "Die Hard" and never gave her film credits. Bruce Willis plays a disgraced Secret Service agent who appear to be a dirt bag private investigator. And Big D is a dirt bag who loves this movie and cheated on every girlfriend he ever had. But not his wife. 

Shat The Movies co-host Gene's a dirt bag who dated a trailer park stripper. Co-host Roger is a dirt bag who doesn't know how commas work. And they all agree that everyone's been cheated on. This episode's a dark podcast for a surprisingly dark movie.

You can thank listener Edwin for commissioning this morally bankrupt podcast. 

The movie's opening montage is painfully and perfectly '90s. The opening football sequence is a bizarre use of Billy Blanks, and it just gets weirder from there.

Willis and Damon Wayans struggle to decide who the movie's funny man is, while we all know the real clown is Wayan's wardrobe. And all the while Big D insists Hallenbeck and Dix are among film's greatest buddy pairings.

Oh, and we settle the question of who's the biggest badass: Joe Hallenbeck or John McClane.

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Nov 29, 2018
Planes Trains & Automobiles (1987) Encore Presentation
01:06:37

Thanksgiving is a holiday like no other: We don't buy presents. We don't wear costumes. We don't party all night. We just bring our family and friends together to share a meal and reflect on our blessings. 

"Planes Trains & Automobiles" is a rare movie in many ways: It's a comedy that makes you cry. It's a John Hughes movie without teen stars. And it's one of the few movies we can think of that celebrates Thanksgiving, one of the most underappreciated holidays on the calendar.

Steve Martin and John Candy created something special that impacted each of the Shat The Movies crew in a different way. Big D immediately hugged his wife and felt a deeper appreciation for life. Gene reflected on his verbal cruelty and picking apart other's weaknesses. And Roger gave thanks for modern technology and improved business travel.

We dedicate this podcast to Roger Roeper's late father, Ronnie, who can't make it to the table this Thanksgiving. Be thankful for your loved ones this holiday season. Tell them you love them. Cherish your time together.

With love,

Gene, Kerri, Roger, and Big D

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Nov 20, 2018
Tron (1982)
01:04:00

Disney's "Tron" digitally dazzled the world as revolutionary work of art: the identity discs, the concept of a computerized world, and visuals that to this day haven't been replicated in their inventiveness and effort.

But one thing sets movies apart from other optical art forms: The Story. And when you read Tron's narrative files, some border on corrupt.

On this podcast, three grown men who worshipped Tron as boys revisit Flynn, Sark, Lora, Dumant, light bikes, solar sailers, the I/O Tower, and the Master Control Program.

Big D brings his Tron toys out to play. Roger questions the sexual undercurrents of the film, and Gene gets just plain mad at the spaghetti bowl of a narrative Disney threw together.

Find out how Tron's artists got those amazing glow effects, why Jeff Bridges was the only actor forced to wear a loin cloth, and how Roger manages to bring religion into even this childish technological tale.

The proof is in the printout.

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Nov 15, 2018
Under Siege (1992)
01:18:54

Everyone has that phase they'd rather not talk about. For some, it's when they wore JNCO jeans. For others, it's when they thought that two-tone ska tattoo was a good idea; or when dating skaters seemed cool.

If the 1990s were a woman, Steven Seagal would be the phase she wishes she could forget.

But we're braver than that, so we're diving into his best work, "Under Siege," to see if there's anything we can salvage from the murky depths of bad action flicks.

Big D, Roger Roeper, and Gene Lyons also cover masturbating to Cher, stealing tags from lingerie, Gary Busey's magnificent insanity, proper bomb-making, proper accent usage, and improper ways to treat young actresses. 

Ponytails, a peacetime military, horrid costuming, and the worst Navy Seals since Panama are pitted against hilarious one-liners, charming Tommy Lee Jones, and bizarre fight sequences in this clear "Die Hard" ripoff. 

Seagal sucks at fighting, movie posters, and telling the truth, but we can't entirely hate him. Find out why in this swashbuckling edition of Shat the Movies, and stay tuned for a super sexy Shatout from Gene.

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Nov 07, 2018
Beetlejuice (1988)
01:21:02

There isn't a soul in this world or the next who doesn't love "Beetlejuice." It's Michael Keaton at his best. It's Tim Burton at his best. It's Geena Davis at her best. It's Alec Baldwin at his handsomest. And it's the role that made Winona Ryder's career (sorry, Stranger Things).

Beetlejuice is everywhere each Halloween season, which makes it easy to watch the movie without really WATCHING it. Well, we did. And we've got a few things to talk about:

  • Big D's fear of small towns
  • which band Danny Elfman really was in (hint: NOT DEVO)
  • Roger's life as The Unabomber
  • Geena Davis inspiring Bojack Horseman
  • teaching Roger what a staycation is
  • how to escape a submerged Volvo
  • Chappaquiddick vs Massapequa
  • why do demons need prostitutes
  • the meaning behind Harry Bellafonte's "Day-O"
  • and much, much more.

This one starts a little slow, but man does it get going. It's SHOWTIME!

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Oct 29, 2018
Pet Sematary (1989)
01:20:39

"Pet Sematary" might be Stephen King's biggest '80s movie hit, but is it any good after 30 years? That depends on whether you value good moviemaking over good writing.

Find out what The Ramones had to do with getting this movie made, why you shouldn't let your cat outside, when it's safe to picnic in Maine, why Fred Gwynne sounds like a '40s detective, and why Cemetery is spelled Sematary.

Kerri Gross, Dick Ebert, and Gene Lyons also cover:

  • horrendous parenting skills
  • even worse fence-building skills
  • when open-casket funerals make sense
  • when infants are the best actors in a movie
  • and how fast a toddler can actually run.

How did nobody call PETA on this one? Was this the first actually scary movie we reviewed? Who the hell edited this thing?

Find out in this week's super-spooky edition of Shat The Movies!

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Oct 24, 2018
Friday The 13th (1980)
01:12:47

"Friday the 13th" changed the world of horror movies when in debuted in 1980, picking up the slasher flick genre where "Halloween" left off. The cast's biggest star was an unknown Kevin Bacon, and the budget was a measly $550,000. With that, "Friday The 13th" made Camp Crystal Lake, Jason Voorhees, and "Ki ki ki, ma ma ma" household names.

King Bee guest hosts this episode of Shat The Movies as we compare cultural appropriation with cultural celebration, discuss checking dog dicks to address them by the appropriate title, learn how to jump out of moving cars, and weigh the challenges of strip Monopoly.

Find out why Kerri Gross had to delete the Uber app, why good things are good, how King Bee rescued a 2-year-old girl on his 21st birthday, and what really happens when you're decapitated.

The Shat Crew also examines why one "Friday the 13th" character sleeps all the time, the merits of sex while wearing shoes, and why Wes Anderson should be tapped for the next "Friday the 13th" movie.

Also, Kerri once pulled the wings off a butterfly.

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Oct 18, 2018
Halloween (1978)
01:14:47

Halloween is in the air, and the Shat crew is ready to get spoopy! Forty years after "Halloween" introduced America to Michael Myers and one week before Jamie Lee Curtis returns in the 11th installment of the series, we examine the original to see if it holds up.

Big D explains the "Star Trek" origins of the Michael Myers mask and questions the reality of babysitter sex. Gene dives deep into the history of Judith Myers' boobs. And Kerri Gross asks just how far a man can carry a 150-pound headstone in one day.

Other lessons learned from the 1978 "Halloween" include: strip off your clothes if you spill butter, always check the back seat of the car, never rely on children to help you in a crisis, assume small-town sheriffs are useless, don't exit your vehicle if mental patients are roaming around at night, and—most of all—don't audibly cry while hiding from a serial killer.

Is "Halloween" a genius independent film that's worth a four decade legacy? Or is it just an un-scary bump in John Carpenter's resume? Find out as Shat The Movies ventures into a month of horror reviews.

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Oct 12, 2018
Gleaming The Cube (1989)
01:19:55

"Gleaming The Cube" brought skateboard culture to the big screen with one of the weirdest plots we've seen to date: A skater Christian Slater investigates the accidental murder of his adopted Vietnamese brother while Tony Hawk delivers pizza.

The villains are stereotypical. The action scenes defy the laws of physics. The blood looks more like Kool-Aid, and the romance is just plain creepy. But there's something about "Gleaming The Cube" that's made it a cult classic despite what Big D calls a conspiracy to keep it hidden from the world.

Kerri Gross regrets voting for this movie dozens of times from different computers. Roger Roeper defends it as an accurate depiction of skateboarders' lifestyle, and Dick Ebert wishes the Shat Score could go even higher to express what a turd it was.

BONUS CONTENT: Stick around after the end trailer to hear Kerri's tribute to Adam Levine of Maroon 5. 

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Oct 04, 2018
When Harry Met Sally (1989)
01:31:12

If you've never fallen in love with a friend, consider yourself lucky. If you've ever fallen in love with a friend, consider this romcom a treasure.

"When Harry Met Sally" used to just be "That Meg Ryan orgasm scene movie" when we were kids. But like the title characters, we've grown up and better understand the intricacies of romance. The question of "Can men and women be just friends?" and concept of "high maintenance" are a lot more relevant at 31 than 13. 

Kerri, Big D, and Gene get really real on this podcast. Big D explains what makes a marriage work. Kerri dissects what it is to love a friend, and Gene identifies with romantic ghosting. It's a very personal, a bit reflective, and like nothing we've ever done before. 

But we still rain Shat on Billy Crystal's hair, '80s women's obsession with marriage, mismatched couples, fake orgasms, and—of course—happy endings.

Grab a tissue, pull your sweetheart close, and try not to fall in love.

Harry Met Sally Horror Trailer Remix
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Sep 27, 2018
My Cousin Vinny (1992)
01:06:45

When you think "My Cousin Vinny," you might think "Joe Pesci comedy classic," but there's a lot more to this 1992 North-meets-South courtroom farce.

For Gene, there's Marisa Tomei at her finest: A charming Mona Lisa Vito with a heart of gold and a wardrobe to match. She's the ultimate '90s Italian heartthrob who delivers the best lines of the movie.

For Roger, there's beloved Fred Gwynne in his final film role. TV's Herman Munster brings warm and gentle comedy to Vinny's Judge Chamberlain Haller after an amazing life story that included World War II service.

And for Big D, there's about 100 jokes involving miscommunication, dick jokes, and implied prison rape.

Is that enough to save "My Cousin Vinny" from overly formulaic writing? Does the fact "Vinny" is used in actual law schools help? Or is this just a middle-of-the-road '90s comedy? 

Listen in, then tell us what you think at hosts@shatthemovies.com.

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Sep 21, 2018
Last Action Hero (1993)
01:14:07

Arnold Schwarzenegger considered "Last Action Hero" the beginning of the end of his film career. After a string of blockbusters, Arnold had a flop on his hands.

"Last Action Hero" — a self-referential parody of every action movie that made Arnold's career — didn't sit well with fans who didn't know what to make of it. Oh, and it was competing with a little movie called "Jurassic Park."

But there's a lot to love about this cinematic oddity: intentionally painful puns, boundless cameos, purposefully ridiculous action sequences, and Arnold being Arnold.

Gene gets a little too cerebral. Kerri reveals her obsession with fart jokes and hatred for AC/DC, and Big D brings the best Schwarzenegger impressions in the business in this Big Gun of a Shat The Movies episode.

Video: Top 10 Darkest Movie Theories
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSIMa4XVgBM

Video: Why 'Last Action Hero' Is Secretly Creepy
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Sep 05, 2018
Arachnophobia (1990)
01:25:20

When "Arachnophobia" was released in in 1990, advertisers were uncertain as to whether they should market the film as a thriller or a comedy. Therefore, television spots promoting the film billed it as a "thrill-omedy". Apparently, nobody saw Ghostbusters or Ghostbusters II. 

With Gene out traveling, Big D & Roger welcome back Kerri Gross to the podcast as they relive some of their most harrowing experiences with the movie as well as real-life encounters with arachnids. 

  • How many bugs crawl into your mouth on average per year?
  • What happened to Rog & Gene when they were naked camping in Northern Arizona?
  • Who would pull the ticks out of Big D's butt when he was performing survival drills in the military?

Discover the answers to these questions and more in a Shat The Movies recording that will make your skin crawl!

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Aug 30, 2018
Armageddon (1998)
01:23:18

"Armageddon" showed us exactly what happens when mega-producer Jerry Bruckheimer teams up with ultra-director Michael Bay: Everything's big, loud, and explodey. The 1998 summer blockbuster mixed an all-star cast with top-notch special effects and all the flag-waving that could be crammed into 160 minutes. 

Big D, Roger, and Gene blast off for disaster when they discuss the confusing science behind "Armageddon," weigh its merits, and explore if its jokes can still be considered funny in 2018.

Did the Armadillo need a mini-gun? Did Grace need to be at NASA? Did the asteroid have a mind of its own? Find out in a Shat The Movies recording the size of Texas flying into your earhole at the speed of sound.

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Aug 23, 2018
Road House (1989)
01:34:27

“Road House” invented the good bad movie. But was it actually any good? Patrick Swayze was charming but grossly undersized. The script was quotable but largely nonsense. And did you know Road House is two words?

Whether you relished Sam Elliot’s smooth bass and glorious mane or cringed at the ridiculousness of tearing out throats, one thing is for sure: the boobs, butts, and bar fights were pure ‘80s.

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Aug 16, 2018
In The Mouth of Madness (1994)
01:14:18

"In The Mouth of Madness" is a cult film that pioneered themes that pushed the boundaries of cinema from 1994 to present day: self-referential film making, Lovecraftian horror, and the general questioning of reality. But does it deserve to be labeled a horror classic?

Every spooky twist on insanity is hamstrung by an awkward acting performance. Every slimy John Carpenter monster is countered by a bizarre herpes kid. This is a movie of high aspirations and stumbling execution. How does it all shake out? Find out from Gene Lyons, Dick Ebert, and Kerri Gross.

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Aug 09, 2018
Heat (1995)
01:35:17

Was "Heat" a star-studded, heart-racing heist movie or a bloated collection of subplots better suited to a mini-series? Michael Mann's masterpiece put Al Pacino and Robert De Niro on the screen together for the first time, and its star-studded cast included Val Kilmer, Tom Sizemore, Jon Voight, Bud Cort, Hank Azaria, Dennis Haysbert, and a young Natalie Portman.

In this edition of Shat The Movies, Big D analyzes the famous Los Angeles shootout (Gene's favorite shootout outside of "The Way of The Gun"), and Roger explains why "Heat" isn't as great as his co-hosts say.

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Aug 06, 2018
Labyrinth (1986)
01:20:10

A 40-year-old, hypersexualized rock star in a codpiece who calls himself a Goblin King steals a baby and tries to seduce the child's 15-year-old sister among dismembered Muppets, roofies, and suggestive lyrics.

Yeah, we're gonna keep this one real professional.

You get ALL FOUR SHAT THE MOVIES HOSTS IN ONE! Roger sees masterful symbolism. Gene hears is gorgeous music. Kerri flashes back to her childhood, and Dick is scandalized by the treatment of children.

Chilly Down with us; do a Magic Dance, and let us Within You.

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Jul 28, 2018
The Goonies (1985)
01:19:14

Was Chunk fat-shamed or fat-famed? Does foreclosure really need to be explained? What's the proper etiquette for wishing well coin collection? And does One-Eyed Willy's hoard count as buried treasure or a fortune lost at sea? Gene and Big D fight for the honor of "The Goonies" as Roger argues it's childish nonsense. 

In "The Gooonies," a band of kids who live in the "Goon Docks" neighborhood of Astoria, Ore., attempt to save their homes from demolition, and, in doing so, discover an old Spanish map that leads them on an adventure to unearth the long-lost fortune of One-Eyed Willy, a legendary 17th-century pirate. During the entire adventure, they are chased by a family of criminals, who also want the treasure for themselves.

The Goonies, Lost Treasure and Maritime: Lawhttp://shatthemovies.com/the-goonies-lost-treasure-and-maritime-law/

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Jul 19, 2018
The Terminator (1984)
01:10:46

Arnold Schwarzenegger plays the Terminator, a cyborg assassin sent back in time from 2029 to 1984 to kill Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton), whose son will one day become a savior against machines in a post-apocalyptic future. Michael Biehn plays Kyle Reese, a soldier from the future sent back in time to protect Connor.


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Jul 12, 2018
Big Trouble in Little China (1986)
01:17:54

Kurt Russell plays hard-boiled truck driver Jack Burton, who gets caught in a bizarre conflict within, and underneath, San Francisco's Chinatown. An ancient Chinese prince and Chinatown crime lord has kidnapped a beautiful green-eyed woman, who is the fiancee to Jack's best friend. Jack must help his friend rescue the girl before the evil Lo Pan uses her to break the ancient curse that keeps him a fleshless and immortal spirit.


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Jul 01, 2018
Showgirls (1995)
01:08:50

Like Cristal Connors (Gina Gershon) and Nomi Malone (Elizabeth Berkley) bonding over their shared joy of eating the same brand of dog food, Roger, Dick and Kerri sit down to discuss the 1995 Paul Verhoeven "Classic" Showgirls.

Showgirls promised to expose the inside workings of Las Vegas, stripping, and hooking... but instead all we learn about was the hazards of monkey-poo on stage, unexpected uses for ice cubes and how to get beaten into a coma by a superstar musician.


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May 17, 2018
The Big Lebowski (1998)
01:18:28

Jeff Bridges plays Jeff Lebowski who insists on being called "the Dude," a laid-back, easygoing burnout who happens to have the same name as a millionaire whose wife owes a lot of dangerous people a whole bunch of money -- resulting in the Dude having his rug soiled, sending him spiraling into the Los Angeles underworld.


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May 02, 2018
Speed 2: Cruise Control (1997)
01:15:46

Can you really call it a movie "Speed" when it only goes 17 knots? Can you call a movie "Speed" when it doesn't have Keanu Reaves? Can you even call this thing a movie? Impossible physics, premarital bickering, misplaced comedy, pedophilia, and a fundamental misunderstanding of copper poisoning make this one of the worst films Shat The Movies has reviewed. But is it THE WORST? Listen and find out.


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Apr 09, 2018
Rounders (1998)
01:11:00

Poker talk, smart voiceovers, Matt Damon in gigantic clothes, Ed Norton as Tyler Durden, John Malkovich butchering an accent, and John Turturro showing his deeper side. "Rounders" is the gold standard for poker movies, and listener Greg R. loves it so much he sponsored this review.

In this episode, Roger reveals his gambling addiction. Gene reveals his heartbreaking struggles with friendship, and Big D gets turned on by jargon. Plus, explore the theory that "Rounders" is just "Fight Club" with cards.


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Apr 09, 2018
Spaceballs (1987)
01:02:51

Spaceballs wins our Best of John Candy category, bringing Roger and Gene together against Big D for the first time ever. Hop aboard the Spaceball One as we blast through the fourth wall, celebrate Rick Moranis, learn about George Lucas' involvement, and debate whether this movie is funny at all.

Roger quotes basically the entire movie. Gene gives in to a rare laughing fit. And Big D assumes he's being punked by their enthusiasm.


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Apr 01, 2018
Backdraft (1991)
01:04:34

Backdraft taught us to yell at fires, run into burning buildings, cool off our sexy bods by firehose, and never, ever let our estranged sons help us make breakfast. And who knew you could make millions converting firehouses into community centers? There's a lot of wisdom in this 1991 Ron Howard cheesefest, but very little of it has to do with fire.

Big D examines when it's OK to bang your ex-wife. Gene cautions against lit cigarettes at arson investigations, and Roger gives a lesson on commercial real estate economics. Plus we hear from the surprising number of brave Shat The Movies listeners who fight fires for a living.


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Mar 20, 2018
Real Genius (1985)
01:03:09

A deliciously young Val Kilmer, an even more delicious young Sarah Jessica Parker (played by Gabriel Jarret), a billion lasers, boring montages, horny cosmetologists, unreal liquid nitrogen, unbelievable penis hammering, Jesus in the teeth, Tear for Fears, and the most famous popcorn scene since Troll 2. "Real Genius" (1985) took the '80s nerd genre to new lows but still managed to exude some genuine charm.

Kerri Gross gets hella scientific. Roger does the math of statutory rape. And Gene questions how anyone can party to Don Henley.


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Mar 13, 2018
Jurassic Park (1993)
01:06:53

The most iconic scenes in movie history, sexy Jeff Goldblum, goosebumps aplenty, a triceratops turd too high, hyperconfident scientists, unnecessary fence climbs and adorable velociraptors made 1993's "Jurassic Park" a movie unlike any other.

Roger defends the strength of fiberglass. Gene actually has fun for once, and Kerri downs an entire bottle of wine before slurring through the entire Visitor Center action sequence. It's a Shat The Movies 65 million years in the making!


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Mar 04, 2018
Braveheart (1995)
01:10:54

Premature kilts, revised history, foppish Brits, Crossfit Scots, a 40-year-old Mel Gibson, a hot 9-year-old princess, undying love, and a romance nobody wanted to see. "Braveheart" brought a new degree of violence and complexity to the historical action genre and made 3 hours fly by.

Don't miss Roger Roeper's triumphant and sexually-charged return to Shat The Movies, Big D's baffling discussion of black eyes, and Gene's uncomfortably intimate recollections of his high school science teacher.

Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken, horse video: https://youtu.be/8-ucbJRkm-Y?t=1m4s


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Feb 23, 2018
Timecop (1994)
01:14:43

Laughable wardrobes, finding excuses for Jean Claude Van Damme to kick things, gratuitous Belgian sex, gratuitous Belgian sax, an avalanche of one-liners, massive plot holes and The Splits Over Troubled Waters ... it's Timecop!

Gene gets deep into physics and time travel theory. Kerri eviscerates the previously unknown "Timecop is like Blade Runner" crowd, and Big D perfect YET ANOTHER action star accent.


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Feb 13, 2018
Conan the Barbarian (1982)
01:10:16

Soundtrack of the gods, camel-punching, surprise romance, imperfect allies, meaty snakes, cannibalistic orgies, and a unanimous Shat Score.

Conan The Barbarian often is lumped in the same shitpile as other fantasy movies, including its sequel, but this abused gem gets nearly everything right. Hear all the reasons to love this not-quite-blockbuster underdog, including its strange literary origins and historical references, and learn just how dangerous this movie was to make.

Big D impersonates Arnold Schwarzenegger during climax. Kerri Gross endorses Conan from a feminist's perspective, and Gene struggles to keep it together.


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Feb 06, 2018
Casino (1995)
01:11:53

A sparkling Sharon Stone, labyrinth storylines, crappy explosions, loud suits, popping eyeballs, James Woods pimpin', and a Joe Pesci blowjob? When you want it all, "Casino" delivers. And it takes 3 tectonic hours to do it.

Guest host Kerri Gross lends a female touch (sorta), encourages domestic violence (sorta), and tells us about the one time she put a glass pipe where glass pipes shouldn't go.

Gene counters with a tale of his "gooch" and laments the loss of a Robert DeNiro in his prime.

Big D has no idea how to pronounce "Goodfellas."


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Jan 31, 2018
Flatliners (1990)
01:05:35

"Med students explore to see what might lie beyond death" might be the advertisement, but what we got was the old bait-and-switch. Instead of that exploration, Flatliners gives us pseudo-Freudian analysis delivered by 1990's Brat Pack 2.0... all of which we found surprisingly enjoyable.


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Jan 23, 2018
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)
01:12:51

Did you know 1990's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was the highest grossing independent film of all time? It was. Did you know creature master Jim Henson lent his magic to the film? He did? Did you know this is one of the most clever films ever written, inspiring countless other comic book movies? That one's debatable.


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Jan 16, 2018
True Romance (1993)
01:07:59

If you're a Quentin Tarantino fan and haven't seen "True Romance," this episode will convince you. And if you're a "True Romance" fan, Roger is about to piss you off. We catalog the phenomenal cast and all the brilliant movies "True Romance" spawned.


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Jan 10, 2018
A Christmas Story (1983)
01:17:07

What goes great with a holiday hangover? How about a scathing edition of Shat The Movies? "A Christmas Story" is quoted, celebrated, immortalized, worshiped, and even has its own museum in Cleveland. After careful review, we don't understand why. Kick the year off angry with one of our most explosive podcasts to date.


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Jan 02, 2018
Scrooged (1988)
01:08:38

Caught in the doldrums between Christmas and New Year's Eve? We've got one more present for you! "Scrooged" might be the sleeper holiday comedy you need this winter. It certainly surprised us. Bill Murray is at his best, and a power-packed cast delivers laughs from start to finish. The visuals are sublime; the jokes are clever, and the humor is fresh -- all without sacrificing some serious heart. It even made Gene Lyons raise a hearty glass of nog and cheer.


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Dec 29, 2017
Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
01:06:23

“The Last Jedi” is here and dividing fans like no Star Wars movie before. Gain some perspective by looking back on the high point of the franchise: “The Empire Strikes Back.” We bow down to its brilliance and magnify some of the rusty parts that didn’t hold up over time.


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Dec 19, 2017
Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)
01:16:08

Judging Kevin Costner's "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" requires one simple question: Not "is it a good movie?" but "Is it worse than 'Willow?" And, thank Alan Rickman, Robin hood is just a bit better. Still, horrible scripting, schizophrenic moods, hammy stunts, bad accents, and a mind-boggling 155 minute run time make "Prince of Thieves" the king of wasted potential.


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Dec 15, 2017
Seven (1995)
01:06:08

Anybody can make a slasher flick. And talented directors can pull off thrillers. But "Seven" is a masterpiece only David Fincher could pull off. Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Spacey and Gwyneth Paltrow round out a powerhouse cast that elevates the grotesque to art. This movie is dark, edgy, poetic, symbolic, and twisted. How the hell was Gene disappointed?


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Dec 01, 2017
Planes Trains & Automobiles (1987)
01:05:58

Easily excitable Neal Page (Steve Martin) is somewhat of a control freak. Trying to get home to Chicago to spend Thanksgiving with his wife (Laila Robins) and kids, his flight is rerouted to a distant city in Kansas because of a freak snowstorm, and his sanity begins to fray. Worse yet, he is forced to bunk up with talkative Del Griffith (John Candy), whom he finds extremely annoying. Together they must overcome the insanity of holiday travel to reach their intended destination.


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Nov 25, 2017
Point Break (1991)
01:17:51

Sometimes, a laughable idea makes for a fascinating film. Surf gangs that double as bank robbers? Keanu Reeves as a tough-talking undercover FBI agent who also happened to be a football star name Johnny Utah? Gary Busey swimming? But then something magical happens. And it's called Patrick Swazey.


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Nov 18, 2017
Predator 2 (1990)
01:19:12

Predator rocked the barrier between action and sci-fi when Arnold Schwarzenegger battled a new kind of enemy in 1987. This isn't that movie. On its face, taking the thrilling Predator formula and applying it to an urban setting makes for a good movie. Throw in big names like Danny Glover, Bill Paxton, and Gary Busey, and you should have a blockbuster. So how did 1990's Predator 2 fail? We'll tell you how!


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Nov 10, 2017
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
01:01:40

"A Nightmare on Elm Street" introduced us to a new slasher villain, a new horror universe, Johnny Depp and blood-fountain waterbeds. But 2/3 of our panel was not impressed with how it holds up in 2017. Wild imagination clashed with goofy execution. Classic lines were fumbled by idiot actors. What we're saying is: Nightmare isn't bad, but don't waste Halloween watching it.


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Oct 31, 2017
Poltergeist (1982)
01:10:49

Steven Spielberg made it, and it's widely considered a horror classic. So why is "Poltergeist" just ho-hum? Is it the bi-polar mood of the film? The shoddy acting? The complete misunderstanding of how actual people react to horrifying events? Or are we just haunted by the memories of days when something this hokey seemed scary?


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Oct 27, 2017
Porky's (1981)
01:14:38

Surprise: We kinda liked Porky's. Also surprise: It's wasn't because of boobs (hardly any, actually) or jokes (so many bad ones). The 1981 Canadian-American teen sex comedy actually had some depth to it, dealing with child abuse, misogyny, racism, and possibly the fallout of war. Seriously!


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Oct 19, 2017
The Matrix (1999)
01:14:36

The Matrix changed the world: new camera styles, new visions of violence, new perceptions of reality, and new uses of vinyl clothing. Laurence Fishburne was unforgettable as the enigmatic Morpheus. Carrie-Anne Moss was sizzling as the sleek and deadly Trinity. And Keanu Reeves was the astoundingly empty vessel we needed Neo to be. But the real star, 18 years after The Matrix debuted, is Hugo Weaving as Agent Smith. Let's review what audiences loved, what still holds up, and what ultimately made this masterpiece just short of perfect.


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Oct 12, 2017
Ghostbusters (1984)
01:25:22

If someone told you "Ghostbusters" was every bit as bad as "Rambo: First Blood Part II," you'd tell him he was crazy. Consider us criminally insane. This iconic '80s classic starring Harold Ramis, Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Ernie Hudson, Rick Moranis and Sigourney Weaver sparked our imaginations and made proton packs a household name, but the years have not been kind.


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Oct 06, 2017
Back to The Future (1985)
01:13:27

In this 1980s sci-fi classic, small-town California teen Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox) is thrown back into the '50s when an experiment by his eccentric scientist friend Doc Brown (Christopher Lloyd) goes awry. Traveling through time in a modified DeLorean car, Marty encounters young versions of his parents (Crispin Glover, Lea Thompson), and must make sure that they fall in love or he'll cease to exist. Even more dauntingly, Marty has to return to his own time and save the life of Doc Brown.


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Sep 28, 2017
Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)
01:00:41

In case you were wondering: No, "Rambo: First Blood Part II" does not hold up. Unless you served in the U.S. Army or really hate computers. From unimaginable POW rescues to an impossibly glistening Sylvester Stallone, this 1985 action drama is the Father of All Action Movie Tropes. Find out what song makes Big D cry, what scenes make King Bee cringe, and what Gene Lyons actually liked about this utter betrayal of its "Rambo" predecessor. .


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Sep 23, 2017
The Blues Brothers (1980)
01:03:15

Was 1980's "Blue Brothers" a perfect movie? Special guest and soul music expert King Bee says yes! Blue Brothers transcended the labels of "comedy," "musical," and '80s movie with incredible awareness of city life and urban joy. It also wrecked over 100 cars and had a massive budget for free cocaine.


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Sep 18, 2017
Top Gun (1986)
01:07:48

"Top Gun" is the perfect time capsule for 1986, the only year where you could make a successful "American romantic military action drama." We remember amazing performances by Tom Cruise, Tom Skerritt, Tim Robbins, Val Kilmer, Anthony Edwards, Kelly McGillis, and Michael Ironside. We remember Kenny Loggins and Berlin propelling the soundtrack to 9 million copies sold. But many people forget this movie had flaws the size of a Tomcat. Find out if it stands the test of time, and learn way too much about our sex lives in the process.


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Sep 05, 2017
Caddyshack (1980)
01:02:51

We asked your favorite Chevy Chase movie. And you answered "Caddyshack." We groaned. But then, something incredible happened: We kinda liked it. Allow us to wipe the fog of age from your memory and revisit all the moments that made Caddyshack Hollywood's worst great comedy.


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Jul 21, 2017
10 Things I Hate About You (1999)
57:45

"10 Things I Hate About You" introduced us to Julia Stiles, Heath Ledger, Joseph Gordon Levitt, and the unsettling reality that '90s Shakespeare adaptations were a really bad idea. If you remember this movie fondly, you're not alone. If you still think it's good after hearing the podcast, you're a fool.


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Jul 14, 2017
Independence Day (1996)
01:01:45

This "Independence Day," let's celebrate the 1996 cinematic dumpster fire that made Will Smith a blockbuster action hero and taught us Jeff Goldblum wasn't acting in "Jurassic Park." That's really him. He can actually hack alien computers. Join us as we fly our mother ship of skepticism through plot holes, wildly offensive performances and Randy Quaid's most annoying character ever.


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Jul 05, 2017
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
56:13

If you've seen "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," you remember every scene. If you've never seen it, you probably still know the quotes, the sets, the characters. This movie distilled everything '80s into a tight, fun, stylish package with a little bit of heart, to boot. But Ferris might not be the clever charmer you thought he was. Memories are funny like that.


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Jun 28, 2017
The Thing (1982)
55:55

Do you like totally gross monsters, psychological thrillers, cute dogs and sexy Kurt Russells? If so, you'll love "The Thing." This John Carpenter classic stands the test of time, despite some glaring plot holes. Never before have Americans so smart done so many stupid things in so little time.


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Jun 22, 2017
Starship Troopers (1997)
51:03

Paul Verhoeven's "Starship Troopers" mixes fun, smarts, action, sex and satire into a star-studded sci-fi package. But a lot of people mistook it for cheeseball macho fluff. Let's relive the terrifying Arachnids, quotable one-liners, Nazi-influenced propaganda pieces and -- of course -- the infamous co-ed shower scene. All hands on deck for Starship Troopers.


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Jun 19, 2017
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
58:51

Our mission is to answer "Were the movies we loved when growing up really that good?" Indiana Jones and The Raiders of The Lost Ark isn't as good as we remembered: It's better. If you're sick of hearing us complain how other '80s movies fell short of the mark, this is the episode for you. We'll discuss how Harrison Ford was perfect for the Indiana Jones role, Karen Allen stole our hearts as Marion, the action scenes thrilled us, and Steven Spielberg's direction tickled our brains. This movie is downright perfect.


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Jun 11, 2017
Batman (1989)
53:51

Sometimes, a podcast episode comes along and ruins your entire childhood. This recap of Tim Burton's 1989 "Batman" is that episode. Give us an hour, and we'll convince you Michael Keaton was a ridiculous Dark Knight, Jack Nicholson was an unoriginal Joker, and journalists really aren't bad. On the bright side, Prince did put together a stellar soundtrack, and Kim Basinger is undeniably at the top of her game.


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Jun 02, 2017
Fight Club (1999)
01:01:53

This week's theme was 1990's movies with a twist, and listeners overwhelming selected David Fincher's masterpiece, Fight Club (1999). While Brad Pitt & Edward Norton may have acted in the film, the real star was the story. Join Roger & Big D as they explore what it really meant to be a man growing up in pre-9/11 America as they dive into their own masculine failures and shortcomings in a throwback episode of Shat the Movies!


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May 26, 2017
Aliens (1986)
57:31

"Aliens" How did James Cameron make a move this good in 1986? Like, seriously, it's impossibly good. Sigourney Weaver is the perfect warrior woman when such a thing didn't exist in film. The story makes sense. The space Marines are badass. Even Bill Paxton's overacting is endearing. On the eve of "Alien: Covenant," let's bow at the altar of the greatest Installment of the Alien franchise.


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May 19, 2017
GoldenEye (1995)
01:01:48

"Goldeneye" gave us a new James Bond in Pierce Brosnan and type of villain with Alan Cumming's Boris The Hacker. But the 1995 blockbuster missed a Golden opportunity to reinvent a franchise that was long overdue for some growing up.

Sure, there were highlights: a sadistically sexy Famke Janssen as Xenia Onatopp, another Sean Bean death and a cameo by Minnie Driver. However, the improbable stunts, goofy gadgets, sexism, misogyny were too much for this movie to overcome.

At least there was the video game. Man, that was a fun game.


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May 10, 2017
Willow (1988)
01:03:41

"Willow" might be the saddest movie of all time, because what's sadder than wasted potential? How do you combine George Lucas, Ron Howard, Val Kilmer, a fantasy universe and a massive budget to create absolute crap?

Start with casting actors strictly based on their height. Next, add recycled plot lines from "Star Wars." And finally, sprinkle the top with talking animals, absurd accents, nonsensical action scenes and the cheesiest villains in movie history.

This is all Gene's fault.

The Wilhelm Scream Explained: https://youtu.be/SzITADosISk


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May 01, 2017
Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)
57:46

"Who Framed Roger Rabbit" sets the bar for 80s movie effects. It boasts inventive techniques, tons of heart and neurotic attention to detail. Shocked? So we're we. But Bob Hoskins, Christopher Lloyd and the Disney-Warner Brothers crossover made believers of three grown men.

Also, Rog did way too much research for this one.

Video: Breaking down the brilliant ways Roger Rabbit was animated - https://youtu.be/RWtt3Tmnij4


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Apr 27, 2017
The Fifth Element (1997)
01:01:22

The Fifth Element combined the action starpower of Bruce Willis, the sexuality of Milla Jovovich, the comedic genius of Chris Tucker, the incomparable talent of Gary Oldman and the fashion vision of Jean-Paul Gaultier. And it pretty much sucked.

Shocked? So were we. In 1997, we worshipped this movie. In 2017, we were horrified to note the glacial pacing, meandering storyline and awkward fight choreography.

Kevin Brackett, of Reel Spoilers and Review St. Louis, guest hosts and confirms our startling realization: The Fifth Element does not hold up.

Subscribe to Reel Spoilers on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/reel-spoilers/id678411082?mt=2

Follow Kevin on Twitter: https://twitter.com/KevinRBrackett


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Apr 20, 2017
Major League (1989)
01:05:38

Major League takes us back to a time when baseball was hot, actresses were sex objects, and Charlie Sheen was likable. And despite some racist overtones and plot holes, this 1989 comedy still holds up.

Bob Uecker is still the best play-by-play on film. James Gammon is still the most believable baseball manager in Hollywood. And a shockingly young Wesley Snipes still dazzles in every scene.

Rog loved it. Gene Shat on it, and Dick knows far too much about baseball. Check it out!


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Apr 17, 2017
Twister (1996)
01:04:47

"Twister" gave us all a horrifying glimpse into a world where the United States doesn't have any politically correct superpower enemies. Left with no face for our fears, director Jan De Bont made weather itself the enemy, and not even a star-studded cast including Bill Paxton, Helen Hunt, Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Cary Elwes could save the resulting shatstorm.

If you were thrilled by this movie years ago or have warm feelings for the late Bill Paxton, let us teach you to hate everything about this movie ... with good cause.


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Apr 11, 2017
Raising Arizona (1987)
58:29

"Raising Arizona" introduced the world of the Coen brothers, Holly Hunter and Tempe, AZ. It also empowered John Goodman to truly display his abilities. But most of all, it showed us how funny Nicholas Cage could be.

Infinitely quotable and impressively shot by Barry Connenfeld, "Raising Arizona" is a 1987 time capsule that hasn't aged a bit. It's every bit as funny now as it was when we were kids.

Gene wrote this and isn't at all biased by his 25 years as an Arizona resident.


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Mar 28, 2017
Blade Runner (1982)
01:06:24

"Blade Runner" should be a classic sci-fi masterpiece. Should be. Ridley Scott directed it. Philip K. Dick wrote it. Harrison Ford, Rutger Hauer, Daryl Hannah and Edward James Olmos brought it to life.

"Blade Runner" brought dystopian aesthetics to life for American audiences in a way we'd never seen before. And it totally sucked.

Before you cancel your Shat The Movies subscription in disgust, hear us out for an hour. If you could stay awake through "Blade Runner," you can sit through this..


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Mar 17, 2017
The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
01:10:23

"The Shawshank Redemption" is one of the finest prison movies ever made, worthy of its 1995 Oscar nomination. But does it hold its own against the other cinematic giants of 1994: "Pulp Fiction," "Forrest Gump," "Quiz Show," and "Four Weddings And A Funeral?"

And why did it cost Gene Lyons his first kiss from the girl of his dreams?

Reminisce about the beauty and transcendence of Stephen King's tale, then jump right into our debate over whether Andy Dufresne really was guilty, Tommy was telling the truth and Hadley was a bad man.

Walking Dead fans, subscribe to "Critically Dead" with Rooster & RJ - http://apple.co/2naVBLh


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Mar 09, 2017
Pulp Fiction (1994)
01:02:20

Some say there's no such thing as a perfect movie. We say, "You need to rewatch 'Pulp Fiction.'" Quentin Tarantino's 1994 quasi-noir masterpiece has earned the first-ever perfect score from Shat The Movies.

The mind-blowing cast includes Bruce Willis, John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Harvey Keitel, Uma Thurman, Ving Rhames, Christopher Walken, Tim Roth, Eric Stoltz, Rosanna Arquette, Steve Buscemi and Peter Greene. The mind-blowing script contains too many quotes to list.

Rog loved it. Gene loved it. Big D loved it. Don't watch any other movies, ever.


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Mar 02, 2017
Highlander (1986)
01:13:26

Is "Highlander" the worst '80s movie? Perhaps. Is it the worst movie Shat The Movies has reviewed? Definitely.

Christopher Lambert can't act. Sean Connery isn't Egyptian or Spanish. We still don't understand why "there can be only one." The movie starts on a high note with Freddie Mercury belting out Queen's "Princes of The Universe," and two very long hours later ends up in the toilet.

"Highlander" had one saving grace: It might have been a veiled legend of a closeted homosexual community coming to grips with its identity. But if it was, none of our gay friends noticed.

Apologies to the entire nation of Scotland and our friends at Great Northern Radio. Brace yourselves for the most vicious review we've ever released.


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Feb 23, 2017
Revenge of the Nerds (1984)
01:04:19

We all remember "Revenge of The Nerds" as a fun '80s college movie, but there's a much darker side when you watch it today. What we once saw as pig pranks, masked sex, panty raids, crazy house parties and fiery undies now can be viewed as animal abuse, rape, theft, arson, hate crimes and assault.

Does that ruin the movie, or do the jokes still shine through? Do Booger's burps, Ogre's brawn or Takashi's Engrish outshine the creep factor of secret video cameras in Pi Delta Pi sorority house? The Shat the Movies team debates these issues and more in this review of the 1984 classic "Revenge of the Nerds."

BONUS for fans of Big D: He was in a fraternity, and he's got loose lips on this episode.


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Feb 16, 2017
Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)
01:05:48

"Terminator 2: Judgment Day" is the rare sequel that launched a franchise from good to unbelievably great. Does "Terminator 2" hold up after two decades? Absolutely.

This prime specimen of sci-fi action perfection has it all: Edward Furlong escaping in the aqueduct chase. Arnold Schwarzenegger shredding cop cars in the mini-gun shooting gallery. Robert Patrick jamming his finger through countless heads. Linda Hamilton cracking skulls and field-stripping rifles like a pro.

And if all of that doesn't convince you to listen, imagine the joy of hearing Gene, Roger and Big D try to wrap their heads around time travel in a non-determinist universe. "Terminator 2" is God's gift to blockbuster moviemaking, and Shat The Movies worships it.


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Feb 08, 2017
Beverly Hills Cop (1984)
01:04:40

"Beverly Hills Cop" launched Eddie Murphy's international movie career and was the biggest box office hit of 1984, but is it overrated?  No, dummy.

This is the police comedy that brought us the banana in the tailpipe, the synth sounds of "Axel F," the lovable Judge Reinhold at Det. Rosewood and Bronson Pinchot's bizarre accent.

Does Eddie Murphy's laugh get annoying? God yes. Do the action sequences make sense? Hell no. But "Beverly Hills Cop" gets our Shat Stamp of Approval. Find out why, and let us know what you think!


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Feb 03, 2017
The Breakfast Club (1985)
01:16:40

High School was a very different place for teenagers back in 1985. There were no cell phones, lockers were still in use, and there was this strange building on campus called the "Library" that housed books and delinquents on Saturdays.

In this week's review, Rog, Big D, & Gene explore the hit film "The Breakfast Club". We explore whether or not the themes of teenage angst, High School stereotypes, and John Hughes-style diversity still hold up over 30 years later.

The Shatty Trio also share stories of their own High School experience, predict where the characters are today, and tackle the question as to why a movie called "The Breakfast Club" only served lunch.


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Jan 26, 2017
Commando (1985)
01:04:53

Give "Commando" some respect! Seriously! This Arnold Schwarzenegger action extravaganza paved the way for watch-based action shows like "24," spawned Arnold comedies like "Kindergarten Cop" and proved you can, in fact, have too much calypso music in a movie.

This episode has something for everyone: Big D wows by using his military experience to backseat drive the world's worst Special Forces operatives. Roger busts out his world-famous Austrian accent, and Gene tells the tragic tale of Val Verde, a nation forgotten because it never existed.

Relive Schwarzenegger's tactical mistakes, marvel at Dan Hedaya's awkward Spanish accent, swoon over the implied homosexuality, and cringe at the veiled pedophilia.

It's all here on Shat The Movies. Sit back, press play, and LET OFF SOME STEAM.


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Theme Song - Die Hard by Guyz Nite

Jan 20, 2017
Rocky IV (1985)
01:05:21

Rocky IV punched its way into the heart of '80s kid by giving us an overload of all the things America loves: a dopy Sylvester Stallone, a terrifying-yet-misunderstood Dolph Lundgren, a sexy robot, Cold War speeches, Carl Weathers' mustache and training montages.

Sure, the punches looked off, the scenes were largely recycled and A GUY DIED IN AN EXHIBITION FIGHT, but after 31 years we're still thrilled by this beefcake brawlapalooza that's tough as snails


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Jan 13, 2017
The Last Starfighter (1984)
01:09:26

The Last Starfighter brought us Rylans, the Kodan, Zando-Zans, Grig, Beta Units and whatever the hell Centauri was. It also delivered childhood dreams of video game supremacy that would carry us to the stars.

But does all that make up for hammy acting, eye-melting CGI and an alien race who look like balding boobs? That's this week's debate, and Shat The Movies' three-man panel is split like never before.

So load up your meteor cannon, strap into your gunstar and get ready to discover a whole lot more about Roger's sex life.


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Jan 06, 2017
Tombstone (1993)
01:12:30

"Tombstone" packed in the stars: Kurt Russel, Val Kilmer, Sam Elliot, Bill Paxton, Dana Delaney, Powers Boothe, Charlton Heston, Jason Priestley, Steven Lang, Billy Bob Thornton and more. And it packed in the action with a relentless shoot-em-up pace. But did it pack as big a punch as we remember?

From historical accuracy to production quality, let's cock the hammer on this 90's western and explore some hot topics, including: how many shells and double-barreled shotgun holds, when it's permissible to seek a new wife, how long after an assassination attempt you must wait to play billiards, and the difference between Doc Holliday and Doc Hollywood.


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Dec 29, 2016
Christmas Vacation (1989)
01:08:53

"National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" tops nearly every list of favorite Christmas movies and holds a warm place in our hearts. But it isn't flawless.

For every "shitter was full", there's an attic plank hitting Clark Griswold in the face. For every moment Chevy Chase show his genius, there's a scene where he's forcing a laugh that never comes.

If you're a huge fan of "Christmas Vacation" or a closet hater, this episode of Shat The Movies is for you. Happy holidays from Roger, Gene and Big D. We wish you the hap hap happiest Christmas of all.


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Dec 22, 2016
Home Alone (1990)
01:08:50

Home Alone is the perfect modern Christmas movie: full of gags, pranks and warm messages about the holiday season.

Or is it?

Take a trip back to 1990 as we explore the parenting skills of the McAllisters, policing in the Chicago suburbs, airport security pre-9/11 and why Uncle Frank is such a dick.

Do you think the polka van was creepy? Do you think Old Man Marley was Jesus? Are you still afraid of the furnace in the basement?

Let Shat The Movies refresh your memory, and relive all Home Alone's classic moments with your three best movie buds.


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Theme Song - Die Hard by Guyz Nite

Dec 17, 2016
Die Hard (1988)
57:40

This week Roger, Gene and Dick cook up the perfect receipt for a delicious 1980’s cinematic treat. With all the key ingredients on hand:  a cop trapped inside a high-rise, a team of desperate terrorists, an iconic villain with brains and panache, and a group of hostages including the cop's estranged wife and you've got yourself the classic 1998 Die Hard.


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Theme Song - Die Hard by Guyz Nite

Oct 10, 2016
The Lost Boys (1987)
01:12:02

This week Join Roger, Dick and their new friend Gene for a stroll down the Santa Carla beach boardwalk; as they review and rewind the 1987 classic The Lost Boys.

Much like Tim Cappella playing his saxophone interpretation of “I Still Believe” they are each shirtless, muscular, oiled up, and ready to grind their hips for you the listeners.

So let’s all slide on our skin- tight purple pants, leather jackets, while we go find the nearest bridge to hang from... Because it’s time to feed.


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Oct 02, 2016
Coming to America (1988)
01:10:42

This week Dick & Roger turn Investigative journalists to blow the lid off the lies behind Paramount Pictures decade’s long cover-up of the Zamundian royal family and their atrocities. The films plot revolves around the discontented Prince Akeem, who is tired of his pampered life and concocts a plan to travel to America with his servant Semmi to find a bide of his choosing. While purporting to focus on the courtship the Prince to the American commoner Lisa McDowell, the film actually turned out to be nothing but pure propaganda.

For over 28 years we have been methodically deceived into believing that King Jaffe Joffer was a benevolent ruler and loving father, but was he? How could a ruler whom accessorize his wardrobe with the carcasses of exotic animals and proudly proclaims to have tied his own shoes once, called it "an overrated experience" be anything but ruthless. The King in fact rules the throne with unquestioned power, and expects complete obedience even when choosing a bride for his son, whom has been trained to mindlessly obey the princes every command.

Whether his vast fortune was built from conflict diamonds, worker exploitation, or environmental degradation it’s obvious the people of Zamunda are subject to unspeakable human suffering. So please join us on the sofa while we fire up the old VCS for a reveling expose on the corruption of wealth and power.


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Sep 21, 2016
Westworld (1973)
01:09:15

To wet your whistle for the old west we decided to cover the 1973 “Classic” movie Westworld, so put on your chaps and saddle up… it’s going to be a rough ride.

Roger Roeper & Dick Ebert will host a weekly podcast will cover Westworld the upcoming science fiction thriller television series created by Jonathan Nolan and Lisa Joy for HBO, based on the 1973 film of the same name, which was written and directed by American novelist Michael Crichton. Nolan serves as executive producer along with Joy, J. J. Abrams and Bryan Burk with Nolan directing the pilot. It is scheduled to premiere October 2, 2016.


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Sep 15, 2016
Gremlins (1984)
01:15:20

Marty McFly, a typical American teenager of the Eighties, is accidentally sent back to his hometown of Hill Valley in 1955… Wait same town, wrong movie.

A horde of miniature green monsters tear through the small town of Kingston Falls after a mild-mannered bank teller Billy unwittingly unleashes the destructive powers of his new exotic pet. His failure to follow his pet’s three simple rules: No water (but beer is ok), no food after midnight, and no bright light lead to countless deaths and undoubtedly years of legal battles for the Peltzer family.

So, when your washing machine blows up or your TV goes on the fritz, before you call the repair man, turn on all the lights and look under all the beds. 'Cause you never can tell, there just might be a gremlin in your house, or it just might be Billy Peltzer sabotaging your entire life.


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Sep 09, 2016
Pretty Woman (1990)
01:13:02

When it comes to 1990’s chick flicks, Julia Roberts is practically the living embodiment of the rom-com genre. From Steel Magnolias and Nottinghill to Runaway Bride, her body of work is almost universally loved by women, and tolerated by the men in their lives. Yet there is one film in the pantheon of Roberts’ repertoire which all men do secretly love: Pretty Woman.

So this week we dive into the 4$ bin and pullout the supposedly modern day version of Cinderella. The story of a woman, Vivian (Julia Roberts) forced into the underground world of prostitution as a way to survive in Los Angeles. She becomes a week long “companion” for an extremely wealthy business man, Edward (Richard Gere). Sadly after spending a week in Beverly Hills luxury and living the life she'd always dreamed of.... she's forced to return to her sad existence and again sell her body for money. Ok.. that’s not how the movie ends, but we all know it should have.


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Aug 30, 2016
Weird Science (1985)
55:08

We fired up the old VCR again this week for the classic Weird Science: The tale of two horny friends Gary and Wyatt who are tired of being social outcasts and not getting any action. With Wyatt's parents gone for the weekend, the two perverts try to create the world’s first real doll.

Using only Wyatt's computer, random photos from their wish boards and a Barbie doll the duo give birth to their “perfect woman” with the limitless powers of a genie. Hilarity ensures including group showers, new interracial friendships, random bikers, dated sport cars and a magical sucking chimney. So let’s all kick back with a glass of scotch and remember the time when it was ok to use magic to get laid.


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Aug 24, 2016
Big (1988)
56:57

Our first return to the VHS vaults is the 1988 classic Big: After a wish from a possessed fortuneteller turns a 12-year-old school boy into a 30-year-old man, he is forced to hide in New York City alone.

A chance encounter with the owner of a toy company leads to an unlikely high paying job and an illegal sexual relationship with an adult coworker. However, the pressure of living as an adult and the torment of his mother grief over her missing son begin to overwhelm him, and he longs to return to his simple, former life as a boy.


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Theme Song - Die Hard by Guyz Nite

Aug 17, 2016