Soccer Neophytes
By Soccer Neophytes
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Subscribers: 3
Reviews: 0
Episodes: 237
Description
Nate, Chris, and Andrew are soccer neophytes.
Relatively new to the game and Premier League specifically, Nate and Chris did their research and after watching the 2018/19 season chose to follow Wolves (Nate) and Manchester United (Chris).
In season five, neophyte Andrew (way to early in the season), chose to support Spurs...he's regretted it ever since.
Every season, they guide a new neophyte through the Premier League season to help them choose a team to support.
| Episode | Date |
|---|---|
|
S8E29 - Arsenal is Bottling Bottling
|
Mar 17, 2026 |
|
S8E28 - Kurtis' Elite Eight
|
Mar 10, 2026 |
|
S8E27 - So You're Telling Me There's a Chance (for Wolves?)
|
Mar 03, 2026 |
|
S8E26 - Good Title
|
Feb 24, 2026 |
|
S8E25 - Future Soccer Neophytes Hosts
|
Feb 17, 2026 |
|
S8E24 - Likability Rankings
|
Feb 10, 2026 |
|
S8E23 - Seeing Red
|
Feb 03, 2026 |
|
S8E22 - Cunha the Great?
|
Jan 27, 2026 |
|
S8E21 - Kurtis Eliminates 8!
|
Jan 20, 2026 |
|
S8E20 - Sacks on Sacks on Sacks
|
Jan 06, 2026 |
|
S8E19 - Moe and Curlied
|
Dec 30, 2025 |
|
S8E18 - Christmas Wishlist
|
Dec 23, 2025 |
|
S8E17 - Own Goals
|
Dec 16, 2025 |
|
S8E16 - Mo Salah, Mo Problems
|
Dec 09, 2025 |
|
S8E15 - Andrew Writes Checks His Body Can't Cash
|
Dec 02, 2025 |
|
S8E14 - Arsenal Wins the Eze Sweepstakes
|
Nov 25, 2025 |
|
S8E13 - Stalled Out at Seventh
|
Nov 11, 2025 |
|
S8E12 - Erling the Centaur
|
Nov 04, 2025 |
|
S8E11 - Body Swap
|
Oct 28, 2025 |
|
S8E10 - And Totally Redeem Yourself!
|
Oct 21, 2025 |
|
S8E9 - The SNL Episode
|
Oct 08, 2025 |
|
S8E8 - Time to Talk Palace
|
Sep 30, 2025 |
|
S8E7 - Lots of Nut Play
|
Sep 23, 2025 |
|
S8E6 - 37 Weghorsts
|
Sep 16, 2025 |
|
S8E5 - Transfer Window Slams Shut
|
Sep 01, 2025 |
|
S8E4 - Too Much Tottenham
|
Aug 26, 2025 |
|
S8E3 - Reijnders Games
|
Aug 18, 2025 |
|
S8E2 - Neophyte Introduction, Predictions, and Kit Review!
|
Aug 11, 2025 |
|
S8E1 - Promoted Teams Preview
|
Aug 05, 2025 |
|
S7E36 - Ellie Makes His Pick
|
May 26, 2025 |
|
S7E35 - Don't Esocculate Prematurely
|
May 20, 2025 |
|
S7E34 - The Sh!t End of the Season
|
May 13, 2025 |
|
S7E33 - The Curse of Ellie
|
May 06, 2025 |
|
S7E32 - Ellie's Final Four
|
Apr 29, 2025 |
|
S7E31 - Wolves on the Ascent
|
Apr 22, 2025 |
|
S7E30 - An Entire Episode Sh!tting On Spurs
|
Apr 15, 2025 |
|
S7E29 - Two Americans and a Mob Boss
|
Apr 08, 2025 |
|
S7E28 - 200th Episode!
|
Mar 18, 2025 |
|
S7E27 - Mo Salah, Mo Problems
|
Mar 11, 2025 |
|
S7E26 - B!tch Sesh
|
Mar 04, 2025 |
|
S7E25 - Passing The Baton
|
Feb 25, 2025 |
|
S7E24 - Bizarro World
|
Feb 18, 2025 |
|
S7E23 - January Transfer Window Recap
|
Feb 04, 2025 |
|
S7E22 - Bye Bye Kyle Walker
|
Jan 28, 2025 |
|
S7E21 - Ellie's Final 12
|
Jan 21, 2025 |
|
S7E20 - I'm a Salmon Man
|
Jan 07, 2025 |
|
S7E19 - Double Neophyte Derbies
|
Dec 31, 2024 |
|
S7E18 - Goalkeeping Apocalypse
|
Dec 23, 2024 |
|
S7E17 - But the Oscar goes to...
|
Dec 17, 2024 |
|
S7E16 - Chris and Andrew are Cowards
|
Dec 10, 2024 |
|
S7E15 - Seven Layer Dip
|
Dec 03, 2024 |
|
S7E14 - Ellie's First Tiers List
|
Nov 26, 2024 |
|
S7E13 - Coote(r) Talk
|
Nov 12, 2024 |
|
S7E13 - The Opposite of the Midas Touch
|
Nov 05, 2024 |
|
S7E11 - While the Cat's Away the Mice Will...
|
Oct 29, 2024 |
|
S7E10 - Father Provides Gentle Rebuke
|
Oct 22, 2024 |
|
S7E9 - Bienvenidos a los Neofitos del Futbol
|
Oct 08, 2024 |
|
S7E8 - We All Hate Cole Palmer
|
Oct 01, 2024 |
|
S7E7 - I Stand With Kyle Walker
|
Sep 24, 2024 |
|
S7E6 - Three Headers Away From A Hat Trick
|
Sep 17, 2024 |
|
S7E5 - Addition By Subtraction
|
Sep 03, 2024 |
|
S7E4 - How Many Oasis Songs Can You Name?
|
Aug 27, 2024 |
|
S7E3 - Burgeoning Feuds
|
Aug 20, 2024 |
|
S7E2 - Introducing Ellie, Predictions, and Kits!
|
Aug 13, 2024 |
|
S7E1 - Promoted Teams Preview
|
Aug 04, 2024 |
|
S6E33 - The Pick Is In...
|
May 20, 2024 |
|
S6E32 - Almost to the Finish Line
|
May 07, 2024 |
|
S6E31 - Royal Rumble!
|
Apr 29, 2024 |
|
S6E30 - Pop Quiz!
|
Apr 09, 2024 |
|
S6E29 - Final Four!
|
Apr 02, 2024 |
|
S6 E28 -Not what you wanted, but is what you needed
|
Mar 19, 2024 |
|
S6E27 - Arsenal's #1 (feat. Titus Hughes)
|
Mar 12, 2024 |
|
S6E26 - Yakkity Sax
|
Mar 05, 2024 |
|
S6E25 - Team Crest Rankings
|
Feb 27, 2024 |
|
S6E24 - Wolves Megacast (w. Stu Hall)
|
Feb 21, 2024 |
|
S6E22 - A Patreon To Read Our Text Threads
|
Feb 13, 2024 |
|
S6E23 - Kyle Walker All-Stars
|
Feb 13, 2024 |
|
S6E21 - The Pete Carroll of the Premier League
|
Jan 23, 2024 |
|
S6E20 - Short and Sweet
|
Jan 16, 2024 |
|
S6E19 - Growers Not Showers
|
Jan 03, 2024 |
|
S6E18 - Lundberg's Final 8
|
Dec 29, 2023 |
|
S6E17 - Mid-Table Props
|
Dec 12, 2023 |
|
S6E16 - Drunk Sunday
|
Dec 05, 2023 |
|
S6E15 - Andrew Keeps Andrewing and Spurs Keep Spurring
|
Nov 29, 2023 |
|
S6E14 - I've Never Scored With My Balls Before
|
Nov 14, 2023 |
|
S6E13 - The Greatest Match In Soccer Neophytes History
|
Nov 07, 2023 |
|
S6E12 - Monster Mash!
|
Oct 31, 2023 |
|
S6E11 - First Quarter Report Cards
|
Oct 24, 2023 |
|
S6E10 - Face/Off
|
Oct 10, 2023 |
|
S6E9 - The Korean Guy!
|
Oct 03, 2023 |
|
S6E8 - Brought To You By Andrew
|
Sep 26, 2023 |
|
S6E7 - Handball-topia
|
Sep 19, 2023 |
|
S6E6 - Pickford's Head's Exit Velocity
|
Sep 05, 2023 |
|
S6E5 - What Does Say What? Karaoke Have To Do With Soccer?
|
Aug 29, 2023 |
|
S6E4 - Who You Play Matters Power Rankings Unveiled
|
Aug 22, 2023 |
|
S6E3 - A CONCACAFy Start to the Season
|
Aug 15, 2023 |
|
S6E2 - Season Preview
|
Aug 08, 2023 |
|
S6E1 - Promoted Teams Preview
|
Jul 31, 2023 |
|
S5E37 - We Saved the Best for Last
|
May 29, 2023 |
|
S5E36 - BORRRRRIIIINNNNGGGGG
|
May 22, 2023 |
|
S5E35 - What Happens in Vegas...
|
May 16, 2023 |
|
S5E34 - How to Share a Pizza
|
May 08, 2023 |
|
S5E33 - A Very Chipper Episode
|
May 01, 2023 |
|
S5E32 - Andrew Hates Everyone
|
Apr 24, 2023 |
|
S5E31 - Dango Unchained
|
Apr 17, 2023 |
|
S5E30 - You're Stuck With Me Forever...Or Are We?
|
Apr 10, 2023 |
|
S5E29 - We May Have Lost Kyle Forever
|
Apr 03, 2023 |
|
S5E28 - The Reddest of Red Card Watches
|
Mar 21, 2023 |
|
S5E27 - European Single Guy Beard
|
Mar 14, 2023 |
|
S5E26 - The Shortest (and Worst) Episode of the Season
|
Mar 07, 2023 |
|
S5E25 - The Relegation Bowl
|
Feb 28, 2023 |
|
S5E24 - A Real Life Cock Block
|
Feb 21, 2023 |
|
S5E23 - Joao Gomes the Legend
|
Feb 15, 2023 |
|
S5E22 - All Redheads Are Fake
|
Feb 07, 2023 |
|
S5E21 - The Dolphin Goal
|
Jan 24, 2023 |
|
S5E20 - Long-Winded Bastards
|
Jan 17, 2023 |
|
S5E19 - Mitrovic is a Son of a B***h
|
Jan 10, 2023 |
|
S5E18 - Lebron James Lookalike
|
Jan 03, 2023 |
|
S5E17 - Introducing Kyle 2.0
|
Dec 27, 2022 |
|
S5E16 - First Half Review / World Cup Preview
|
Nov 15, 2022 |
|
S5E15 - Two Self-Burns in One Episode
|
Nov 08, 2022 |
|
S5E14 - Is Newcastle Replacing Liverpool?
|
Nov 02, 2022 |
|
S5E13 - The Most Depressing Weekend Ever
|
Oct 25, 2022 |
|
S5E12 - An Idiot Abroad
|
Oct 18, 2022 |
|
S5E11 - Melancholy in the Midlands
|
Oct 11, 2022 |
|
S5E10 - So Much Drama In the NLD
|
Oct 04, 2022 |
|
S5E9 - Kung Fu Collins
|
Sep 20, 2022 |
|
S5E8 - VARy Interesting Decisions
|
Sep 06, 2022 |
|
S5E7 - The Cap
|
Aug 30, 2022 |
|
S5E6 - Leeds United States of America
|
Aug 23, 2022 |
|
S5E5 - 20 Manager Royal Rumble
|
Aug 16, 2022 |
|
S5E4 - I'm Feeling Like This Podcast is Accurately Named All of the Sudden
|
Aug 08, 2022 |
|
S5E3 - 2022/23 Season Preview, Part 2: Kits, Kits, and More Kits
|
Aug 03, 2022 |
|
S5E2 - 2022/23 Season Preview, Part 1: Meet the Neophyte & Predictions
|
Aug 02, 2022 |
|
S5E1 - Promoted Teams Preview
|
Aug 01, 2022 |
|
S5SS - My Day With Wolves Academy
|
Jul 25, 2022 |
|
S4E36 - Down to the Wire
|
May 23, 2022 |
|
S4E35 - So You're Telling Me There's A Chance?!
|
May 17, 2022 |
|
S4E34 - Linguistics: A Primer
|
May 10, 2022 |
|
S4E33 - A Big Fish in a Big Pond
|
May 03, 2022 |
|
S4E32 - Does Anyone Want to Even Play in Europe?
|
Apr 26, 2022 |
|
S4E31 - The Cats Away.......
|
Apr 19, 2022 |
|
S4E30 - A Horse in the Fight
|
Apr 12, 2022 |
|
S4E29 - And We're Here Dicking Around With Burnley-Everton
|
Apr 05, 2022 |
|
S4E28 - Korean BBQ Beef Jerkey
|
Mar 22, 2022 |
|
S4E27 - Putin Out!
|
Mar 16, 2022 |
|
S4E26 - Billy Big Bollocks
|
Mar 08, 2022 |
|
S4E25 - JESSE MARSCH!
|
Mar 01, 2022 |
|
S4E24 - No one Carabao that Cup
|
Feb 22, 2022 |
|
S4E23 - The Love Episode
|
Feb 15, 2022 |
|
E4S22 - America, Making Norwich Great Again
|
Jan 25, 2022 |
|
S4E21 - Get On That City Bus
|
Jan 18, 2022 |
|
S4E20 - Timothy Hoiland AFCON Cybermetrics Special
|
Jan 04, 2022 |
|
S4E19 - The Fresh Legs of Cavani
|
Dec 28, 2021 |
|
S4E17 - The Bold and The Baseless
|
Dec 22, 2021 |
|
S4E16 - Code Red
|
Dec 14, 2021 |
|
S4E15 - Tierney Tucks his Top
|
Dec 07, 2021 |
|
S4E14 - Ragnarok!
|
Nov 30, 2021 |
|
S4E13 - We're Basically The Bachelor For Soccer
|
Nov 23, 2021 |
|
S4E12 - A Clean Sh-t
|
Nov 02, 2021 |
|
S4E11 - (A Lonely) Soccer Neophytes Derby Double Header
|
Oct 27, 2021 |
|
S4E10 - Bees Batter Blues But Lose
|
Oct 19, 2021 |
|
S4E9: Boring James Milner
|
Oct 05, 2021 |
|
S4E8: Bruno's Final Penalty
|
Sep 28, 2021 |
|
S4E7: Dainty Version of Lavender
|
Sep 21, 2021 |
|
S4E6: Seeing Red
|
Sep 14, 2021 |
|
S4E5: There Was No Skin To Skin
|
Aug 31, 2021 |
|
S4E4: Nate Had Cornrows?!
|
Aug 24, 2021 |
|
S4E3: Tears, Boogers, and Hey Jude!
|
Aug 17, 2021 |
|
S4E2: The Nigerian Neophyte
|
Aug 10, 2021 |
|
S4E1: Promoted Teams Preview
|
Aug 03, 2021 |
|
S3 Bonus: What if...?
|
Jul 20, 2021 |
|
S3E32: And The Team Is...
|
May 24, 2021 |
|
S3E31: The Most Likable Chelsea Fan on the Planet
|
May 18, 2021 |
|
S3E30: The Sleeping Giant Has Awoken
|
May 11, 2021 |
|
S3E29: Man United, the MMA Fighter
|
May 04, 2021 |
|
S3E28: ForEverton
|
Apr 27, 2021 |
|
S3E27.5: Who Should You Support Now?
|
Apr 20, 2021 |
|
S3E27: Glazers Out!
|
Apr 20, 2021 |
|
S3E26: We're Crying Lemina's Tears
|
Apr 13, 2021 |
|
S3E25: Down to Six!
|
Apr 06, 2021 |
|
S3E24: 3-0 is the new 2-0
|
Mar 22, 2021 |
|
S3E23: The Silence Says Everything
|
Mar 09, 2021 |
|
S3E22: We're the Southampton of EPL Podcasts
|
Mar 02, 2021 |
|
S3E21: All Are Welcome To Cry On Our Trampoline
|
Feb 23, 2021 |
|
S3E20: #FKW (Kyle's Final 8 Revealed)
|
Feb 16, 2021 |
|
S3E19: Red Card Apocalypse
|
Feb 09, 2021 |
|
S3E18: Ruff n Stuff With My (mini) Afro Puffs
|
Feb 02, 2021 |
|
S3E17: You're Likeably Arrogant
|
Jan 26, 2021 |
|
S3E16: Full Circle
|
Jan 19, 2021 |
|
S3E15: Two Special Guests
|
Jan 04, 2021 |
|
S3E14: Dick Out a Shot
|
Dec 29, 2020 |
|
S3E13: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. City
|
Dec 22, 2020 |
|
S3E12: A Kick to the Ass
|
Dec 15, 2020 |
|
S3E11: The Cream Always Rises to the Top, Oh Yeeeaaahh!
|
Dec 08, 2020 |
|
S3E10: Prayers for Raul
|
Dec 01, 2020 |
|
S3E9: 25 Shots, 4 On Target (aka Nate's College Years)
|
Nov 24, 2020 |
|
S3E8: Do the Fulham Shuffle
|
Nov 10, 2020 |
|
S3E7: Fred Has Naked Pictures of Ole
|
Nov 02, 2020 |
|
S3E6: Everton are the 1980s Pistons
|
Oct 27, 2020 |
|
S3E5: Follow Me to Goalapalooza
|
Oct 19, 2020 |
|
S3E4: 1 Minute of Joy and 89 Minutes of Horror
|
Oct 05, 2020 |
|
S3E3: They Didn't Tie, Chris!
|
Sep 28, 2020 |
|
S3E2: No Matter How Bad Your Weekend Was, It Wasn't As Bad As Fulham's
|
Sep 21, 2020 |
|
S3E1: Like Sophomores Getting Pregnant
|
Sep 14, 2020 |
|
S3E0: 2020-21 Preview
|
Sep 07, 2020 |
|
Nov 2019: Sacks Galore
|
Dec 06, 2019 |
|
October2019: Welcome Back
|
Oct 30, 2019 |
|
S2E5: Pinkie Up or Pinkie Tucked?
|
Sep 17, 2019 |
|
S2E4: Red Card Trifecta
|
Sep 02, 2019 |
|
S2E3: Undefeated...but winless
|
Aug 26, 2019 |
|
S2E2: The First Ever Football Neophytes Derby
|
Aug 20, 2019 |
|
S2E1: Man U will go undefeated (and other over-reactions to week one)
|
Aug 13, 2019 |
|
2019/20 Season Preview
|
Aug 07, 2019 |
|
21_Decisions
|
May 11, 2019 |
|
20_Everton
|
May 10, 2019 |
|
19_Leicester City FC
|
May 03, 2019 |
|
18_Manchester United
|
Apr 26, 2019 |
|
17_Huddersfield Town
|
Apr 19, 2019 |
|
16_Cardiff City
|
Apr 05, 2019 |
|
15_Watford
|
Mar 08, 2019 |
|
14_Burnley FC
|
Mar 01, 2019 |
|
13_Newcastle United
|
Feb 08, 2019 |
|
12_Wolves
|
Jan 25, 2019 |
|
11_Chelsea
|
Jan 11, 2019 |
|
10.5_Criteria Update
|
Dec 29, 2018 |
|
10_Brighton and Hove Albion
|
Dec 21, 2018 |
|
9_AFC Bournemouth
|
Nov 30, 2018 |
|
8_Crystal Palace
|
Nov 02, 2018 |
|
7_Southampton
|
Oct 12, 2018 |
|
6_West Ham United
|
Oct 04, 2018 |
|
5_Fulham
|
Sep 28, 2018 |
|
4_Tottenham Hotspur
|
Sep 22, 2018 |
|
3_Manchester City
|
Sep 07, 2018 |
|
2_Arsenal
|
Aug 24, 2018 |
|
1_Liverpool
|
Aug 18, 2018 |
|
Football Neophyte #0
|
Aug 11, 2018 |