Gay Therapy LA with Ken Howard, LCSW, CST

By Ken Howard, LCSW, CST

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Subscribers: 18
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Episodes: 207

Description

Gay Therapy LA with Ken Howard, LCSW, CST A gay men's mental health, sex, and relationships podcast If you've ever wished there were a therapy-informed podcast just for gay men, you're in the right place. I'm Ken Howard, LCSW, CST – a gay men's specialist psychotherapist, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, Certified Psychiatric Social Worker, longtime LGBTQ+ advocate, and gay men's life/career/relationship coach with over 32 years' experience working almost exclusively with gay male individuals, couples, and polycules. On Gay Therapy LA, you'll get more than clichés or recycled pop psychology. This is a deep-dive podcast for gay men's mental health, sex, and relationships—rooted in real clinical experience with thousands of clients over three decades. We talk about what actually shows up in gay men's lives: Mental health for gay men: anxiety, depression, trauma, shame, internalized homophobia Gay men's relationships: monogamy, open relationships, consensual non-monogamy, polycules, jealousy, trust, communication Sex therapy for gay men: desire, performance, erections, ejaculation, kink, porn, HIV, PrEP, sexual confidence Gay men and aging: body image, muscles, appearance pressure, midlife, older gay men, long-term HIV survivorship Dating and intimacy: hookup culture, apps, ghosting, rejection, attachment, finding and keeping a partner Gay men and success: career transitions, burnout, money, retirement, purpose, and building a life that actually feels good Episodes are mostly just me—so you get unfiltered, no-nonsense, therapist-level insight without fluff, plus occasional guests whose expertise or lived experience can help you grow. Every episode is designed to give you practical tools, perspectives, and strategies you can use immediately in your life, not just "interesting conversations." If you're a gay man who wants better mental health, stronger relationships, more satisfying sex, and a more successful, meaningful life, this podcast is for you—whether you're in your 20s, 40s, 60s, or beyond. About the practice behind the podcast Gay Therapy LA with Ken Howard, LCSW, CST is the podcast of my private practice: Psychotherapy for gay men in California (online) Coaching for gay men worldwide (online) I'm the founder of GayTherapyLA.com and GayCoachingLA.com, based in West Hollywood, California, serving gay men all over the world via webcam and phone. My credentials include: California Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) Certified Psychiatric Social Worker AASECT Certified Sex Therapist Certified in Consensual Non-Monogamy and Polyamorous Families Retired Adjunct Associate Professor in Social Work (USC) Through both psychotherapy (California) and coaching (worldwide), I help gay men improve their mental health, strengthen their relationships, upgrade their sex lives, and maximize their quality of life and career, leveraging their past to enhance their future. While this podcast cannot substitute for personal therapy and is provided for educational purposes only, the episodes reflect the kinds of themes and strategies I work on with clients every day. Your questions, comments, ratings, and reviews are very welcome, as are suggestions for future episodes. © 2025 Ken Howard, LCSW, CST. All rights reserved.

Episode Date
Gay Men and How to Build Real Friendships in Adulthood
Apr 16, 2026
When a Gay Man's Career Feels at Risk: False Accusations & Workplace Anxiety
Apr 11, 2026
Gay Couples in Business Together: Power, Competition, and the Hidden Cost to Intimacy
Apr 07, 2026
Why So Many Gay Men Lose Their Drive in Midlife (No One Talks About This)
Mar 31, 2026
Why So Many Successful Gay Men Feel Unsettled in Midlife
Mar 14, 2026
Gay Men and Immediate Coping Tips for a Breakup
Feb 24, 2026
Why So Many Gay Men Feel On Edge Right Now—and What Actually Helps
Feb 19, 2026
Gay Men and Practical Tips for Ed
Feb 10, 2026
Gay Men on the Autism Spectrum: Dating, Intimacy, and Being Understood
Jan 31, 2026
The Hidden Stages of a Gay Man's Career
Jan 20, 2026
Heated Rivalry: A Gay Therapist's Take on Romance, Fetishization & Visibility
Jan 12, 2026
It's OK to Hate the Holidays: Coping Skills for Gay Men
Dec 19, 2025
Gay Men and Non-Monetary Wealth: Redefining What It Means to Feel Rich
Dec 18, 2025
Why Gay Men Can't Stop Scrolling: The Real Reasons Behind Compulsive Phone Use
Dec 09, 2025
Gay Men and Wicked: For Good
Nov 19, 2025
Gay Men and Psychiatric Medications: Functions, Fears, and Facts
Nov 08, 2025
Why Mid-Life Gay Men Still Use Hookup Apps — and What That Really Means
Nov 02, 2025
Are All Marines Gay Bottoms? Military Myths in Gay Culture
Oct 13, 2025
Gay Men and Post-Nut Clarity: What It Really Means
Oct 13, 2025
Yom Kippur and Gay Men: Finding Meaning in Reflection, Atonement, and Renewal
Sep 28, 2025
Toxic Gay Currencies: How to Avoid the Attention, Sex, and Status Traps
Sep 17, 2025
From Obama to Trump: Understanding the Whiplash in American Politics Through the Lens of Minority Stress and Gay Men's Mental Health
Sep 04, 2025
Gay Men Healing from Trauma: Why Substance Matters More Than Hype
Aug 26, 2025
When "Non-Affirming" Therapists Keep LGBTQ+ Clients for the Money: An Ethical Failure with Real Consequences
Aug 18, 2025
Gay Men and The Cinderella Syndrome: From Outcast to Adonis
Jul 25, 2025
Gay Men as Adult Children of Alcoholics - How the Past Talks in the Present
Jul 21, 2025
Gay Widowers: Navigating Loss, Identity, and Rebirth
Jul 19, 2025
Radical Erotic Aging: Gay Men, Desire, and the Audacity to Stay Sexy
Jul 08, 2025
Gilligan's Island & The Seven Deadly Sins: What a 60s Sitcom Can Teach Gay Men
Jun 24, 2025
Gay Men Overcoming Unconscious Barriers to Success
Jun 19, 2025
Gay Men and Understanding Personality Traits: The OCEAN Model
Jun 11, 2025
Flash vs. Substance: Pop Psychology Gurus vs. Real Clinicians
May 24, 2025
Gay Men and Coping with the Forms of Betrayal
May 19, 2025
Positive Masculinity for Gay Men in a Changing World
Apr 28, 2025
The Success Principles for Gay Men: What We Can Learn from Jack Canfield
Apr 17, 2025
White Lotus and Gay Men's Fantasies - The Teasing Taboo of Pop Culture
Mar 31, 2025
The Healthcare Hustle: What Gay Men Need to Know
Mar 20, 2025
Legal Essentials for Gay Men: Protecting Your Future
Feb 27, 2025
When You Know You're Ugly: A Guide for Gay Men Coping with Physical Unattractiveness
Feb 14, 2025
Gay Men and Therapy Support for a Legal Case
Feb 04, 2025
Interview of Host Ken Howard, LCSW, CST on the History of Gay Men's Therapy and His Career
Jan 21, 2025
Gay Executive Coaching and The Dark Side of Ambition: Navigating Toxic Competition in the Workplace
Jan 14, 2025
Gay Men and the Lessons Learned from 'Wicked'
Jan 07, 2025
Therapy, Coaching, Psychiatry, and Medicine - Let's Stop the Misinformation, Shall We?
Dec 14, 2024
Gay Men and Trump 2.0 - Coping with Anxiety
Nov 26, 2024
Gay Men as Caregivers for Aging Parents
Nov 14, 2024
Special Bonus Episode: In Defense of Hate: Understanding the Modern American Conservative
Oct 29, 2024
Gay Men and the Need for Attention: Healthy vs. Unhealthy Narcissism
Oct 29, 2024
Managing Symptoms in Gay Men's Mental Health: A Path to Empowerment
Oct 15, 2024
Netflix's "Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story" – Gay Psychotherapist on Healing for Gay Male Survivors of Sexual Trauma
Sep 23, 2024
Gay Men Open Relationship Ground Rules: Who What When Where Why
Sep 20, 2024
Support for Gay Men Leaving Religion: Reclaiming Your Identity with Secular Alternatives
Sep 04, 2024
How to Survive Election Season 2024: Coping with Election Anxiety
Aug 08, 2024
Episode 152: Gay Men and Internal Family Systems: The Different Parts of You
Jul 22, 2024
Episode 151: Gay Men's Dating: What Your Dates Aren't Telling You
Jul 03, 2024
Episode 150: Gay Men's Relationships: When You Want Kids and He Doesn't
Jun 11, 2024
Episode 149: Confronting Religious Moralism in Therapy for Gay Men
May 21, 2024
Episode 148: How to Get Your Financial Life Together: A Guide for Gay Men
Apr 28, 2024
Episode 147: Gay Men and How to Recover from a Breakup
Apr 05, 2024
Episode 146: Gay Men and Starting Your Own Business
Mar 22, 2024
Episode 145: Gay Men and How to Be a Better Lover
Mar 12, 2024
Episode 144: Gay Men and Wealth: Coping with Rewards and Challenges
Feb 25, 2024
Episode 143: Seven Ways to Enhance a Gay Men's Relationship for Satisfaction and Longevity
Feb 04, 2024
Episode 142: Gay Men and the Emotional Benefits of Kink Play
Jan 23, 2024
Episode 141: Gay Men and Gender Role Enforcement Rage
Jan 14, 2024
Episode 140: Gay Men, the Holiday Season, and the Five Senses
Dec 21, 2023
Episode 139: Gay Men and Santa Daddy
Dec 09, 2023
Episode 138: Gay Men and How To Reach Your Full Potential
Nov 19, 2023
Episode 137: Gay Men and Spirituality: Reclaiming Your Rights
Nov 08, 2023
Episode 136: What Is Daily Mental Health for Gay Men?
Oct 28, 2023
Episode 135: Top 10 Reasons Gay Couples Break Up and How to Prevent Them
Oct 16, 2023
Episode 134: The Gay Male Executive: Coaching for Success
Oct 07, 2023
Episode 133: Gay Men, Dating Challenges, and How to Cope with Them
Sep 24, 2023
Episode 132: Lessons for Gay Men from the 'On the Boulevard' Musical
Aug 28, 2023
Episode 131: The Economics of Gay Male Relationships: Time, Energy, Money
Aug 13, 2023
Episode 130: Gay Men and Knowing Your Sexual Self
Jul 18, 2023
Episode 129: Correction Announcement for Audio File
Jul 03, 2023
Episode 129: Gay Men and Superheroes as Role Models
Jun 28, 2023
Episode 128: Gay Men and Moving On in Life After Trauma
Jun 13, 2023
Episode 127: Balance and Reciprocity in Gay Men's Dating and Relationships
May 18, 2023
Episode 126: Gay Men and Coping with Cheating
Apr 30, 2023
Episode 15: How Can I Prevent My Gay Male Partner from Cheating? The Six Main Reasons and Their Fixes
Apr 25, 2023
Episode 125: Gay Men, Activism, and Social Conscience
Apr 08, 2023
Episode 124: Gay Men and Mixing Your Boyfriend with Your Friends
Mar 19, 2023
Episode 123: Gay Men and the Function/Purpose of Casual Hookups
Mar 04, 2023
Episode 122: Gay Men and Life Lessons We Can Learn from Actors
Feb 05, 2023
Episode 121: Gay Men and When Our Mentors Have Flaws
Jan 23, 2023
Episode 120: Gay Men and New Year, New Sex: Mind, Heart, Body
Jan 09, 2023
Episode 119: Gay Men and Kink Sexual Health: Notes from the 2022 CLAW Conference
Dec 12, 2022
Episode 118: Gay Men Who Have Given Up On Finding a Relationship
Nov 06, 2022
Episode 117: Gay Men Overcoming Specific Traumas - PART TWO
Oct 19, 2022
Episode 116: Gay Men Overcoming Specific Traumas - PART ONE
Oct 19, 2022
Episode 115: Gay Men and Pets: Challenges and Rewards
Sep 19, 2022
Episode 114: PART TWO - Gay Men's Dating Situations That Are "No-Go" – And Their Alternatives
Aug 31, 2022
Episode 113: Gay Men's Dating Situations That Are "No-Go" – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE
Aug 23, 2022
Episode 112: Gay Men and the Mental Health Aspects of Monkey Pox
Aug 07, 2022
Episode 111: Gay Men and Trauma Recovery: Reclaiming Your Life
Jul 10, 2022
Episode 110: PART TWO: Gay Men and Kink: Sensory Enhancements to Sex
Jun 28, 2022
Episode 109: Gay Men and Kink: Sensory Enhancements to Sex - An Overview (Part One)
Jun 20, 2022
Episode 108: Gay Men, Pride Season, and Summer Lovin'
Jun 05, 2022
Episode 107: Gay Men and Reconciling Your Religious Beliefs with Your Sexuality
May 19, 2022
Episode 106: Gay Men and Mismatched Libidos: Navigating Difference
May 01, 2022
Episode 105: Gay Men's Sexuality: Focus on the Five Senses for Better Functionality
Apr 12, 2022
Episode 104: Gay Men and How to Avoid the Pitfalls of Dating
Mar 29, 2022
Episode 103: Mental Health Aspects of Sexual Health for Gay Men
Mar 15, 2022
Episode 102: Gay Male Relationships: What are the Boundaries Between Partners?
Feb 23, 2022
Episode 101: Gay Men and Coping with 'Bad Luck'
Feb 06, 2022
Episode 100: Gay Male Relationships and the ADD/OCD Syndrome
Jan 18, 2022
Episode 99: Gay Men and Food: A Dynamic Relationship at Any Age
Dec 31, 2021
Episode 98: The Greeks' Eight Types of Love as Applied to Gay Men
Dec 14, 2021
Episode 97: A Secular Appreciation of Christmas for Gay Men
Dec 05, 2021
Episode 96: Gay Men and When It's Time to Break Up a Relationship
Nov 17, 2021
Episode 95: Coping with Sudden Crisis: A Personal Story
Nov 09, 2021
Episode 94: Gay Men Who Live Together Too Early
Oct 09, 2021
Episode 93: Gay Men and Consensual Non-Monogamy Early in Relationships
Sep 25, 2021
Episode 92: Gay Men and How to Ruin a Friendship: Ten Tips
Sep 04, 2021
Episode 91: Gay Men Coping with ED: The Emotional, Physical, and Interpersonal
Aug 25, 2021
Episode 90: For a Job, For a Guy, For a Change: Gay Men and the Decision to Relocate
Aug 03, 2021
Episode 89: Gay Men Using Apps: The Dilemma of Dating Versus Hookups
Jul 11, 2021
Episode 88: The Needs of Gay Men in the Volatile "LGBT" Era
Jun 25, 2021
Episode 87: Gay Men and Gym Crushes: Cherish Your Romantic Notions
Jun 18, 2021
Episode 86: COVID's End as Trauma Recovery in Gay Men
Jun 01, 2021
Episode 85: Healthy Relationships Don't Do That: A Guide for Gay Men's Dating and More
May 15, 2021
Episode 84: Improving Gay Men's Relationships: Meeting Three Needs
May 11, 2021
Episode 83: Three Ways to Improve Your Sex Life for Gay Men
Apr 27, 2021
Episode 82: The Six Principles of Sexual Health As Applied to Gay Men
Apr 12, 2021
Episode 81: How to Avoid a Gay Relationship Breakup - The Four Risks
Mar 30, 2021
Episode 80: Revisiting Sex Addiction and Porn Addiction with Guest David Ley, Ph.D.
Mar 17, 2021
Episode 79: Gay Men and Money Management: How to Empower Yourself
Mar 07, 2021
Episode 78: Gay Men's Relationships: How to Deal with Your Ex
Feb 23, 2021
Episode 77: Gay Therapist on Sexual Mental Health: The Triumvirate of Self, Partner, Others
Feb 10, 2021
Episode 76: Gay Men's Goals: How Do You Define Success in the New Year?
Jan 26, 2021
Episode 75: Gay Men's Relationship Vocabulary: Partner? Husband? Hookup?
Jan 12, 2021
Episode 74: Gay Men's Dilemmas: Falling in Love with Straight or Unavailable Men
Dec 29, 2020
Episode 73: Gay Relationships and the 'Sexual Thaw': Restoring Sex After a Long Stalemate
Dec 09, 2020
Episode 72: Gay Men, COVID-19, and Avoiding the Pitfalls: Substances, Lethargy, and Despair
Nov 25, 2020
Episode 71: Gay Male Couples and the Decision to Have Kids
Nov 13, 2020
Episode 70: Gay Men and Sex During COVID-19
Oct 30, 2020
Episode 69: Gay Men's Relationship Advice: How to Succeed in an Age-Difference Relationship
Oct 12, 2020
Episode 68: Gay Men's Relationship Advice: How to Have a Successful Gay Long Distance Relationship
Sep 22, 2020
Episode 67: Gay Men and the Need for Safe Spaces of Our Own
Sep 12, 2020
Episode 66: The Mental Health Chapter from "Self-Empowerment: Have the Life You Want!" Book
Sep 02, 2020
Episode 65: Two Tops, Two Bottoms: A Gay Men's Relationship Dilemma - Now What?
Aug 25, 2020
Episode 64: Gay Men's Strengths: Making the Most of Your Culture
Aug 15, 2020
Episode 63: Gay Men and Discipline: The Secret Weapon to Achieving Your Goals
Aug 09, 2020
Episode 62: Gay Male Creative Professionals: Celebrating Success, Managing Challenges
Jul 30, 2020
Episode 61: Must-Have Money Conversations for Every Gay Relationship
Jul 18, 2020
Episode 60: Gay Men and Alcohol: The Relationship with the Bottle
Jul 11, 2020
Episode 59: Why Nerds Make the Best Boyfriends for Gay Men
Jul 08, 2020
Episode 58: Gay Men and the Big Five Personality Traits
Jun 27, 2020
Episode 57: Gay Men Coping with Stress: Start at the Source
Jun 09, 2020
Episode 56: Problem-Solving in Gay Men's Open Relationships
May 30, 2020
Episode 55: Gay Men Making the Most of Your Past, Present, & Future
May 26, 2020
Episode 54: Coping with COVID-19 for Gay Men: What Type Are You?
May 19, 2020
Episode 53: Gay Men in Common Crisis Situations & Steps to Handle Them
May 12, 2020
Episode 52: Why White Gay Men Should Support Black Lives Matter
May 12, 2020
Episode 51: Gay Men Coping with Single Life: Tips and Tricks
May 02, 2020
Episode 50: Three Types of Erectile Dysfunction and their Interventions
Apr 20, 2020
Episode 49: The New COVID-19 Coping: Balancing "Toxic Positivity" with "Adaptive Coping"
Apr 14, 2020
Episode 48: Gay Men's Mental Health During COVID-19: Next to Normal
Apr 08, 2020
Episode 47: Gay Men and the Mental Health Aspects of Working from Home
Apr 01, 2020
Episode 46: Gay Men Conquering Anxiety with Probability
Mar 25, 2020
Episode 45: How Gay Men Can Develop Resilience - Part 2 - Techniques
Mar 16, 2020
Episode 44: How Gay Men Can Develop Resilience - Part 1 - Traits
Mar 16, 2020
Episode 43: Gay Men and Coronavirus/COVID-19: A Special Kind of Coping
Mar 12, 2020
Episode 42: Ten Ways Gay Men Can Handle Hard Conflict
Mar 10, 2020
Episode 41: Gay Men's Dating Skills -Avoiding the Pitfalls of Cash, Connections, C--k
Feb 29, 2020
Episode 40: Positive Thoughts for Fabulous Living at Every Age for Gay Men
Feb 24, 2020
Episode 39: Beyond Crystal Meth Recovery: Meth Prevention for Gay Men
Feb 17, 2020
Episode 38: Valentines Day for Single Gay Men: Coping with Hope
Feb 11, 2020
Episode 37: Gay Men and the Serenity of Acceptance, Courage, Wisdom
Feb 11, 2020
Episode 36: Avoiding Four Big Risks of Gay Relationship Breakup
Feb 03, 2020
Episode 35: Gay Men's Birthdays, Self-Esteem, and The Meaning of Life
Jan 27, 2020
Episode 34: Hotter Monogamy for Gay Men
Jan 20, 2020
Episode 33: The Golden Boys - Gay Men at Midlife
Jan 13, 2020
Episode 32: Breaking the Ice - Gay Men Overcoming Shyness
Jan 06, 2020
Episode 31: Beyond New Year's Resolutions: Making Real Life Changes
Dec 30, 2019
Episode 30: A Secular Appreciation of Christmas for Gay Men
Dec 17, 2019
Episode 29: The Gym/Fitness Connection in Gay Men's Mental Health
Dec 05, 2019
Episode 28: Gay Men at Thanksgiving - Living in Gratitude
Nov 26, 2019
Episode 27: Gay Men and Appearance Privilege
Nov 21, 2019
Episode 26: Gay Men's Relationships - Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom
Nov 14, 2019
Episode 25: Beyond Crystal Meth Recovery - Meth Prevention for Gay Men
Nov 06, 2019
Episode 24: Confronting Our Fears at Halloween
Oct 31, 2019
Episode 23: How to Reach Your Goals: Approach/Avoidance
Oct 22, 2019
Episode 22: Managing Jealousy in a Gay Male Relationship
Oct 15, 2019
Episode 22: Managing Jealousy in a Gay Male Relationship
Oct 15, 2019
Episode 21: Coping with the Breakup of a Friendship
Sep 26, 2019
Episode 20: Best Predictors of Men's Well-Being
Sep 18, 2019
Episode 19: Finding Mr. Right in Gay Men's Dating: The Six Lights Theory
Sep 12, 2019
Episode 18: Gay Male Sexual Abuse, Incest, and Rape Survivors: Coping and Thriving
Sep 05, 2019
Episode 17: Toxic Busy: How Much Is Too Much for Gay Men?
Aug 28, 2019
Episode 16: How Gay and Straight Relationships Differ in 10 Ways
Aug 26, 2019
Episode 14: Advice for Young Gay Men - 12 Tips to Improve Your Life Now and Later
Aug 20, 2019
Episode 13: The Role and Value of a F--- Buddy for Gay Men
Aug 19, 2019
Episode 12: Gay Men and Erectile Dysfunction: Cognitive Causes and Cures
Jul 18, 2019
Episode 11: Conflict in Gay Relationships: My Partner Isn't Contributing Equally
Jul 08, 2019
Episode 10: Topics in Sex Therapy for Gay Men: Overcoming Fear of Topping
Jul 02, 2019
Episode 9: Topics in Sex Therapy for Gay Men: Overcoming Fear of Bottoming
Jun 25, 2019
Episode 8: Gay Men and Ghosting: Why We Do It, How We Cope
Apr 29, 2019
Episode 7 - Gay Men and Social Media with Matthew Allen APCC
Apr 02, 2019
Episode 6 - Religious Abuse of Gay Men and Its Healing - Brandon Malde-Zoradi
Mar 28, 2019
Episode 5: Why Gay Men Cheat and How to Prevent It
Mar 17, 2019
Episode 4: Gay Men and Depression: Four Strategies for Help
Mar 13, 2019
Episode 3 - Problem-Solving in Gay Men's Open Relationships
Mar 09, 2019
Episode 2 - Gay Men and Gay Relationships 2.0 - Should I Go Back to My Ex?
Mar 04, 2019
Episode 1: Gay Therapy LA with Ken Howard, LCSW New Podcast
Nov 08, 2018