Connected Families Podcast

By Connected Families

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We challenge and encourage you to be the thoughtful and confident parent you long to be.

Episode Date
Want to Build Connection in Your Family?
37:39
As parents we long to build a connected family. Connection. We all long for genuine, connected relationships. It’s how God wired us. It makes sense that, when this element is lacking in our relationships, it can cause us to feel so many difficult and discouraged emotions. Especially in the relationships we value most. You want to feel connected to your kids and to the people you care about, but that can be really hard.  Is there a secret to authentic connection? A tool to help build a connected family? Your family can experience this! Co-Founders Jim and Lynne Jackson wrestled…
Dec 06, 2021
Applying the ABC's of Affirmation
36:11
Does your child get discouraged? Does it feel like your child’s misbehavior seems to drown out the positive things you might notice? And the more you notice misbehavior, the more it seems to happen. We tend to gravitate toward the things we feel need “fixing” in our kids, because our brains prioritize attending to anything wrong or threatening. This is normal!  As a parent you care deeply about your child and want them to grow in wisdom and responsibility, which doesn’t always come naturally! But you can learn to shine a bright spot in a really effective way, on the…
Nov 29, 2021
Joe and Becky's Story
37:59
Creating a culture of safety in your home
Nov 22, 2021
An Honest Conversation About Adoption
36:46
Many of the families in the Connected Families community were formed through adoption.This month, during National Adoption Awareness Month, we look more closely at how the Connected Families Framework can be applied to children who joined their family through adoption (or foster care). Whether or not you’ve adopted, you will not want to miss this podcast!  Note: In this podcast we are sharing the perspective of three internationally adopted transracial families. We recognize there are many different ways adoptive families are formed. Kids who have entered our families through adoption have experienced trauma. This is an honest conversation about adoption,…
Nov 15, 2021
Why Changing Your Parenting Is So Hard
36:26
Why is changing your parenting just so hard? You’ve tried everything to get a better result in your parenting: You’ve read the books, watched the seminars, tried new methods. You know that you want a different approach to your parenting, but you just don’t know what to do or how to do it. And it’s hard!  It’s messy to rewire old patterns that have been established over many years. This is true for everyone–you are not alone! We can be tempted to give up when a new strategy doesn’t bring the instant change we think we should be getting. But…
Oct 25, 2021
Is Mom Guilt Good? | Ep. 79
36:08
Mom guilt is real and it feels so heavy. Moms, do you ever find your thoughts spiraling through these statements? “I’m such a mess!” “I can’t get it together and my kids don’t like me!” “I’m a bad mom” Stress, feeling overwhelmed, and lack of sleep can intensify all these feelings. It’s important to know you are not alone in the struggle with guilt and shame. And you don’t have to stay stuck in it. There is always hope! In today’s podcast, Katie Wetsell (pediatric nurse and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach ) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share…
Oct 18, 2021
How Do I Get My Child to Obey?
33:28
Does God require your kids to obey immediately? Immediate obedience is probably a familiar concept to you. And, to be quite honest, it’s a hot-button topic! If you’ve ever asked yourself, “How do I get my child to obey?” then this is the podcast for you! Or maybe you feel like your demands for first-time obedience seem to bring more tension and discouragement for both you and your child? If so, this podcast will bring you clarity and encouragement as you seek to be a more connected parent! How DO I get my child to obey? Here at Connected Families, we…
Oct 11, 2021
The Key to Unlocking Wisdom and Responsibility in Kids
36:52
Your child is misbehaving and you just want it to, “Stop!” You want to bring some control to the situation. Emotions escalate. The key to unlocking a Christ-like identity, wisdom, and responsibility in your kids is not a method or a formula. It’s connection. Parenting is hard! You want to hold your child accountable when they misbehave, but your first reaction as a parent can set the tone for how your child receives that discipline. If you want to know what to do to change the trajectory of a tense encounter with your child listen to this podcast. The result: more…
Sep 27, 2021
How to Be Safe for Your Kids | Ep. 76
38:16
It’s normal to feel stuck in the frustration of trying to “fix” your child’s behavior. Despite exploring numerous parenting resources and methods, does your heart still feel unsettled? Like you, many other parents feel the same way. Patterns of control, yelling, blaming, and shaming only seem to bring greater disconnection in your relationship with your child. You want things to be different. You want to be safe for your kids, but the patterns seem too ingrained. How can you find a better way to discipline; making sure you are safe for your kids while remaining firm? Today’s podcast gets right…
Sep 20, 2021
Why It’s Better to Parent in Community | Ep. 75
27:37
Ever feel alone or isolated as a parent? Between navigating your kids’ misbehavior in public, enduring other judgmental parents, and the demands of daily life, staying isolated can often feel easier than attempting social connection and events. Yet parenting without a solid community can bring feelings of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. Just like our kids, we as parents need to feel safety and connection in community too. That comes when we parent in community. What holds us back from parenting in community? And what’s the way forward to more safe, connected, and meaningful parenting relationships? Join us and our guest Heather…
Sep 13, 2021
How to Raise a Responsible Student (Who Has a Social Life) | Ep. 74
32:30
If you’re like most parents, you want your child to be a responsible student. But you also want them to use their time wisely to they can have an active social life. (Aaaannnnd, it would be great if they were good at athletics, debate, excited about youth group every Wednesday night, AND could get their chores done without complaining. 😊) Whatever your child’s strengths and challenges are, each school year brings a new set of hopes and dreams. You want your child to be a responsible student, but you also want them to learn life skills that will set them…
Aug 23, 2021
Classroom Anxiety: It’s Common, and You Can Help | Ep. 73
29:25
Is your child struggling with anxiety about going back to school? How do you navigate the uncertainties of a new school year? If you and your child are feeling stressed about all the changes and upheaval surrounding school, you are not alone! Classroom anxiety is more common than you think. We have some super helpful information to get you and your kids on the right track for a more calm and connected school year!    Today’s episode is absolutely packed with essential information and practical application. This podcast will help you better understand and connect with your child in their struggle…
Aug 16, 2021
Are We Hardwired to Connect? Part 2- Ep. 72
29:58
What does the Bible say about connection in parenting? How do we work that out practically in everyday family life? Of course theology is important. But theology alone doesn’t always tell you how long your kids should play a video game, or how to specifically respond when your child asks tough questions.  That’s where scientific research comes in! We’ve heard from countless people the reason they continue to access Connected Families resources is because we integrate science and biblical principles. Our goal is to make what can seem lofty into digestible and practical content for parents.  Today’s episode is Part…
Aug 10, 2021
Are We Hardwired to Connect? Part 1-Ep.71
27:48
Are you longing for practical parenting resources that address both the spiritual and the scientific? Why are they both important? God created our souls, brains, and bodies, and He wants us to understand His creation. Research affirms the biblical truth that you and your kids are hardwired to connect. The science of connection combined with the wisdom of God’s Word are the heartbeat of all we do and teach at Connected Families.  You won’t want to miss today’s Connected Families podcast! The Connected Families Framework is compelling and effective. Why? Because of the unique and powerful intersection of science and…
Aug 09, 2021
Teach Your Child to Have a Growth Mindset with These Four Steps | Ep. 70
32:29
Have you heard the buzz about having a “growth mindset” versus a “fixed mindset”? How can you teach your child to have a growth mindset? When our kids lack the skills to do what we are asking them to do it can create discouragement in your home. Maybe you’ve even asked yourself the following:  “Why isn’t my kid motivated to clean their room?” “How many times do I have to show my child how to load the dishwasher?” “What does it take for my child to notice the towel on the bathroom floor?” It would be great if our kids…
Jul 26, 2021
Help! My Child Keeps Unbuckling and the Kids are Spitting! | Ep. 69
23:12
Your child keeps unbuckling their seatbelt in a tantrum while you are driving down a busy road. One of your kids spits at his sibling when he gets angry. What do you do when your child has big emotions and actions, and despite your best efforts to implement connection and correction, the behavior doesn’t seem to improve? Maybe you’ve experienced challenging situations like these, and you don’t even know where to start.  In today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) to discuss some of the challenging questions parents ask about…
Jul 19, 2021
Christian Discipline: The story behind our unique framework for parenting | Ep. 68
32:11
As a parent you might feel overwhelmed with the mountain of resources available to you regarding Christian discipline. From podcasts, to books, to seminars, there is no shortage of available content you could access. But, when you are Christ-follower AND you are tuned into the latest in research and attachment-based parenting, you are looking for something more. Something that combines heart, soul, and body. Connected Families was born from this deeply felt need of parents who were longing for real solutions and a deeper connection with their kids. Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) hosts…
Jul 12, 2021
My Kid is Looking at Porn
30:05
“My kid is looking at porn! What should I do?” Have you experienced this? Or maybe you are concerned about how to prepare your child for future encounters with something inappropriate. Pornography is highly accessible in today’s culture. Marketers seem to sexualize everything to sell products. In a world where we are unable to shield our children from this, how do we respond? Today’s podcast is the third of a three-part series focused on topics that dads often encounter as they seek to lead with grace. Join Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family…
Jun 21, 2021
Setting Boundaries with Screens | Ep. 66
32:22
“My kid is obsessed with gaming! Are they addicted? What should I do?” If you’ve found yourself making these kinds of statements you are not alone.  It’s amazing how something small on a screen can have such a big impact. And screens are everywhere. How do you set boundaries when you think your child is addicted to screens? There are real solutions and we are going to dig into them. Today’s podcast is the second of a three-part series focused on topics that dads often encounter as they seek to lead with grace. In this episode, Jim Jackson (co-founder of…
Jun 14, 2021
How to Leave a Legacy | Ep. 65
32:08
What comes to your mind when you hear the word “legacy”? We feel inspired when we hear stories about the legacy of someone who has made an impact in the world.  Hearing these stories may inspire you to want to leave a valuable legacy of your own. OR maybe that idea feels painful to you. You might have regrets and wonder if it’s too late to leave the legacy you had hoped for.  Whatever your experience, take heart and be strengthened that today is a new day! This podcast will guide you in taking steps to leave a legacy of…
Jun 07, 2021
Help! My Child is Violent! | Ep. 64
28:55
You ask your child to do something simple and they respond with violence. Your five-year-old comes at you forcefully with a toy and is going to hit you. Maybe your teenager is physically fighting and things are getting out of hand. You start to realize your child is violent. Now what? As a parent in this situation you may feel discouragement, fear, anxiety, or even shame. It’s hard to know what to do when your child is physically aggressive, and it’s natural to feel your own emotions escalate as well. You may be wondering, “How can I bring peace to…
Jun 01, 2021
What’s the Best Way to Handle Shared Parenting? | Ep. 63
44:19
Co-parenting, intense emotions, tough transitions – these single-mom challenges can be hard! If you are a single mom, you have probably navigated rough waters in these areas. It may feel so discouraging at times. The good news: There are ways to keep you and your kids steady and growing in wisdom through it all. Emotional security and connection are key. This podcast will walk you through what that can look like in daily life as a single mom. It IS possible to navigate shared parenting in a respectful way.  Today we bring you the second part of our podcast series…
May 27, 2021
Being a Single Mom is Exhausting | Ep. 62
38:08
Being a single mom is exhausting. And when we hear from single moms, they often say things like, “I feel SO alone.”  “I don’t know if I can make it.”  “Are my kids and I beyond hope?” Maybe you wrestle with thoughts and beliefs like these too. Do you wonder if God is listening, and working in your difficult situation? Listen in on today’s episode focused on single parenting. We believe the wisdom shared will infuse you with solid truth and precious grace to keep you walking the road of motherhood on a firm foundation.  Above all, know that God…
May 24, 2021
Grace and Truth for Moms | Ep. 61
36:24
Does the stress and struggle of parenting leave you feeling unworthy or incapable of being the mom you long to be? Do these statements sound familiar? “I’m a failure as a mom and I have ruined my kids!” “I’m an angry parent with an angry child!” Perhaps it feels like you are parenting from a place of discouragement and anxiety. We want you to know that God’s grace runs deep for you, and you are not alone. You can find grace and truth for yourself as a mom. In today’s episode, you will learn how to work through the feelings of…
May 03, 2021
How Can I Teach My Child to Pray Heartfelt Prayers? | Ep. 60
Do you struggle to teach your child how to pray? How do you instill something deeper when your child just wants to pray for a new xbox?  Like many parents, you likely desire to see your kids engage in a meaningful prayer life. That can be hard! Sometimes kids just get bored when we pray! Or find it difficult to get past a surface-level prayer. The good news: There are many practical and effective ways to model and encourage your kids to grow in more heartfelt and personal prayer. Today on the Connected Families podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks…
Apr 26, 2021
Help! How do I keep a conversation going with my child? | Ep. 59
Frequently parents focus on conversation skills when there is conflict. But what about in the normal day-to-day interactions? Do you feel like it is more difficult than it needs to be to have a “normal” conversation with your child? Do you feel like you spend a lot of time telling your child what to do instead of asking the right questions? It’s hard when you feel like, “My child won’t talk to me!” Sadly, sometimes our reactions as parents is what shuts the conversation down. Can you relate? If so, this podcast discussion will bring you the honest and hope-giving…
Apr 21, 2021
What Should I Do When My Child Is Having a Meltdown in Public? | Ep. 58
25:16
You’re in the grocery store. Or the park. Or at a family gathering. And you sense a major meltdown coming. It’s so embarrassing when your child has a meltdown in public – especially when you know other people are watching! Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they offer practical and down-to-earth solutions to this real-life struggle. This podcast addresses some common questions we frequently hear, such as: “What should I do when my child is having a meltdown in public?” “Is there a time and place for immediate obedience, and what does that look like?” “How…
Apr 14, 2021
My Child Quits Everything | Ep. 57
27:51
In today’s episode we dig into the second part of our series on raising overcomers! Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) talk about how to help kids develop resilience and, in the process, uncover the unique purpose God has for them.  If you feel like your child quits everything too soon then this is the podcast for you. Does your child get stuck in defeat? Or have trouble moving forward when things feel too hard? These can be beautiful opportunities to see the gifts beneath their struggling behavior. You can encourage and strengthen…
Mar 24, 2021
Raising Overcomers: How to Model Resiliency to Your Kids | Ep. 56
29:15
In this raw and candid episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) to discuss both the challenges and the beauty of raising overcomers. When you are in Christ you are an overcomer, and you can graciously raise your child to move beyond feeling overwhelmed to being a resilient overcomer. While in the refuge of God’s grace and hope, trials and challenges can be a profound opportunity to grow resilience in your child. This starts with the foundational mindset that learning and teaching resilience is a process. These challenges also invite you…
Mar 16, 2021
Kids Struggling to Sleep? Here’s How to Equip Them to Sleep Well | Ep.55
30:53
Do you feel like bedtime struggles are a losing battle? Does bedtime leave you feeling exhausted? Your child wants another glass of water, another bedtime story. They’re afraid of the dark. Or overflowing with wound-up energy from the day. You are exhausted. Frustrated. And if your kids are struggling to sleep, you don’t sleep!  We have heard your cries! Kids not going to sleep (or staying asleep) is a fairly frequent concern we hear from parents during coaching sessions. If you feel like you have tried everything and wonder why nothing is working, you’re in the same boat as so…
Mar 10, 2021
How to Take Advantage of Sibling Rivalry to Explain Emotions and Feelings to a Child
31:18
Few things can be more frustrating as a parent than trying to mediate sibling rivalry. You want your kids to be friends but instead they are fighting, badgering, and teasing each other. It feels like you are getting nowhere!  You think, “How do I stop him from hitting others?” or “Why can’t my kids just get along?!” But what if we could use sibling conflict as an opportunity to explain emotions and feelings to a child? You know what the cool thing is? Sibling rivalry is the perfect opportunity for teaching emotional awareness and explaining about feelings and emotions to…
Feb 25, 2021
The Power of Empathy: How to Teach Your Child to “Feel Another’s Feelings”
26:36
“How do you think that makes your sister feel?” or “You can’t do that to him!” Sound familiar? As a parent you likely want your child to be known as kind, generous, sensitive, and empathetic. These expectations can cause stress and anxiety if we see our child behaving in a way that lacks the power of empathy.  Empathy is a natural skill we are born with, right? Nope. What is natural for kids? To be selfish, egocentric, and not think about the feelings of others. So you might be wondering, “Can empathy be taught to kids?” Absolutely.  Today, Stacy Bellward…
Feb 17, 2021
Thinking About How to Fix Your Marriage? Try This. | Ep. 52
38:26
Do you ever feel like you want to try and fix your marriage? Or change something about your spouse? The solution to this challenge might surprise you! In this podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) are hosted by their good friend, Ellie Hope Collins, on her podcast Hope Reclaimed. We are passionate about building strong marriages as a vital piece of the parenting puzzle! In honor of Valentine’s Day, we have a special episode for you on emotionally safe marriages. “Our marriage is all built on this strange, quirky, messy foundation of grace, of safety, of identity…
Feb 10, 2021
Got a Strong-Willed Child? So Did This Mom. | Ep. 51
34:01
Your strong-willed child is refusing to choose. You are offering two choices, just like you’ve learned. “Give your child some choices,” they said. “It will help them feel some control,” they said. But your child just stamps their foot and refuses to choose. You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions! During the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart…
Feb 03, 2021
Your Child Struggles to Transition. Here’s What to Do. | Episode 50
31:39
You have work to do and need to move on from playing with your child. They don’t want you to go. And they whine. They fuss. What can you do when your child struggles to transition? You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions! Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course)  is joined by…
Jan 27, 2021
The God-Given Gifts in Your Child's Misbehavior
24:21
It takes skill to misbehave! A verbal child often argues with you until you’re exhausted. An emotional child might cry or manipulate. A physical child is more likely to get aggressive or grab something they want. Though it feels frustrating and even counter-intuitive, a shift in attention to your child’s strengths by finding their gift-gone-awry can help. Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Together they talk about the third part of the Connected Families framework: You are CALLED and CAPABLE! They discuss the transformational idea of finding the gifts beneath your child’s misbehavior.…
Jan 20, 2021
Why Demanding Respect From Kids Doesn’t Work | Ep. 48
23:52
Recently, we introduced you to Juan and Nita from South Africa. Today, we are excited to bring you a more in-depth interview where they share their heart for their two daughters as well as the 196 children who live in LIV village.  They are learning that demanding respect from children often doesn’t work in the long run. Married for almost 12 years, Juan and Nita are the parents of two children and cross-cultural missionaries in their native South Africa. Listen in as they tell of the exciting work God is doing through the Connected Families’ Discipline That Connect With Your…
Dec 16, 2020
How to Connect with Your Kids in Any Circumstance | Ep. 47
56:50
As you’re heading into some potentially stressful situations over the next few weeks (changing schedules, relatives who might judge your parenting, or not feeling connected to your kiddos) take some time and listen to this encouraging podcast we pulled out of the archives. (This podcast originally aired in 2015.) Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, were interviewed by Heather MacFadyen of the Don’t Mom Alone podcast (formally God Centered Mom). While some of the scenarios may not be relevant to today (car rides to see relatives, eating in restaurants), they give some really practical tips and scripts that…
Dec 09, 2020
What Causes Anger Issues in a Child? | Ep. 46
30:54
What do you do when your child gets angry? What causes anger issues in a child? When kids respond with angry, aggressive behavior, stress and fear are often the underlying emotions. Children who have experienced trauma often react with heightened fear responses. In this podcast episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, continue their conversation with Lisa Qualls about parenting kids from hard places. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. In today’s episode, they talk about the importance of nurture to connect,…
Nov 11, 2020
Parenting Kids from Hard Places with Unique Needs | Ep. 45
29:58
Are you parenting a child through adoption or foster care? Are you struggling with bonding to your child or their attachment to you? Your feelings of isolation and discouragement can be very real and overwhelming.  As an adoptive parent, maybe you’ve experienced a heightened sense of grief as you search for answers in unfamiliar parenting territory. If you are looking for practical hope, you will find both solidarity and strategies here for your parenting journey. NOTE: even if you are not parenting a child through adoption or foster care, we encourage you to take the time to listen. You will…
Nov 04, 2020
Enjoy Your Children the Way You Always Wanted To | Ep. 44
28:59
Are you scrambling to find clarity and help in your parenting? Are you struggling to find practical tools that bring lasting change? Do you wish you enjoyed your children more? Discover the power of connection and the hope of restoring a more peaceful relationship with your child! How one mom learned to enjoy her children Today’s guest is Emily, an alum of the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course. Emily and her husband have three boys. They experienced many of the typical challenges parents often face, as well as a rough transition in the adoption of their…
Sep 23, 2020
Parents: Feeling Burned Out? Try This. | Ep. 43
25:13
Feeling burned out at the end of the day? Does parenting (and discipline) leave you feeling overwhelmed and discouraged?  If you are feeling “parenting burnout” there is help and hope. Perhaps you will identify with our guests today, Nate and Amanda. This couple joins us to discuss the burnout parents often face in the discipline process with their kids. What does parenting burnout look like? Like so many couples, Nate and Amanda were enthusiastic and confident before their children were born. They were ready with ideas about how they would parent and connect with their children. Yet, like many of us,…
Sep 16, 2020
Parenting from a Place of Fear
26:10
“My kids will never grow up to be responsible!” “I am a terrible parent, and my child and I will never get along!” Are you parenting from a place of fear? Even catastrophizing a situation? Do you find yourself replaying negative thoughts in your mind about yourself and your child? You are absolutely not alone! It’s easy to let fears about our parenting and our kids grip us and cause anxiety. Toxic beliefs can affect our own hearts, and the hearts of our children. These beliefs are like a recording that plays over and over in our head. We hear…
Sep 09, 2020
What to Do When Kids Are Scared of the World Around Them | Ep. 41
41:23
Are your kids scared of the world around them?  How are you talking about anxiety with your kids these days?  In current times coping is harder, and there seems to be more reasons to worry than usual. You may experience tension when your family gathers because everyone views what’s happening in our world through different lenses, and with different opinions. Relationships with some of the most important people in your lives seem at risk. It can be hard to talk about things that concern or upset us.  When we are anxious, our kids are the first to know. Kids have…
Jul 29, 2020
What to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40
27:17
Mealtime battles, bedtime drama, homework struggles… Can you relate to these anxiety triggers in your home? Often there are deeper emotions under the surface, for both parents and children, that contribute to these conflicts. When we acknowledge and validate the emotions that drive our children’s anxiety, we can better equip them to self-regulate. Validating emotions also helps us avoid anxiety-producing power struggles. This equips us to approach these struggles in a way that empowers our children to feel safe, loved, and capable. We are excited to bring you episode three in our four-part Anxiety Series. Today Jim and Lynne Jackson,…
Jul 22, 2020
How to Teach Your Child Not to Be Scared | Ep. 39
35:41
How do you teach your child not to be scared? Bedtime, meals, learning at home, performance anxiety, and separation anxiety can all be sources of anxiety for kids. This is especially true for kids who may be highly sensitive. Kids who struggle with anxiety are often more “on alert” than other children, and don’t always assess danger well.  Kids who are anxious can also get their cues from parents. The more we try to create an environment that keeps kids out of a highly-alert state, the more sense of peace and calm the child can feel. In our previous podcast…
Jul 15, 2020
My Child is Afraid of Everything | Ep. 38
27:41
Do you feel like your child is afraid of everything? Where does anxiety come from in our kids? This is a huge struggle parents often face, especially when tensions are high in the world around us.  A survey Connected Families conducted in spring of 2020 revealed that 70% of families in the CF community have reported elevated levels of anxiety in recent months. If you are experiencing this, you are not alone! Kids’ struggles and misbehavior can increase everyone’s anxiety and the tension in the home. Our own anxious thoughts about children’s misbehavior can cause us to try harder to control kids, which…
Jul 08, 2020
What to Say When Your Child Makes Outrageous Statements | Ep. 37
18:55
Have you ever heard an outrageous statement from your child? Outrageous statements come in all shapes and sizes and can often trigger disbelief or even outrage in parents. Perhaps that’s why they’re called outrageous statements!  It’s tempting for us, as parents, to respond to these situations with immediate correction or a lecture. However, this may result in unhelpful arguments. Hard emotions are often underneath our kid’s outrageous statements. How can we respond with love, connection, and safety to effectively help them grow in wisdom and responsibility?  Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected…
Jul 01, 2020
How to Have a Great Summer Without Pestering Your Kids | Ep. 36
23:21
Are you feeling anxious about this summer? Summer can be a fantastic opportunity to connect with your kids, but it can also present new challenges. You want to have a great summer, but aren’t quite sure how to get there. Uncertainty and disappointment add an extra level of stress, especially with the new reality of cancelled activities and plans. In this podcast we will explore how to create a sense of teamwork in your family so summer is enjoyable for everyone. We, as parents, may also have our own fears about navigating difficult battles, such as screen time and boredom.…
Jun 24, 2020
Are You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35
22:13
Does it seem like all you do is nag your kids? Are you frustrated because this is the sixth time you have asked your child to take out the garbage? Nagging and arguing can become the frustrating norm in many of families. Parents have good intentions. We want our kids to grow up to be responsible, right? Our fear and anxiety that our children will not grow up to be responsible adults can cause us to become controlling. This kind of projected negativity has the potential to affect our child’s identity. In fact, brain science reveals that these power struggles…
Jun 17, 2020
How to Put Screens Back in Their Place | Ep. 34
25:10
You want to be intentional about screen time with your kids, but you’ve got an uphill battle! The pandemic isn’t making it any easier either. If you’re struggling with how to be intentional about screens, especially when your kids require them more than ever, this is the podcast episode for you. Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they dive into the challenges of our kids and their screen time. They discuss how best to approach screen time from a place of connection and guidance, not just enforcing rules. These ideas will equip you to lead your…
May 28, 2020
What To Do When Kids Interrupt Important Conference Calls | Ep. 33
7:15
Working at home can be challenging! And exasperating. In this difficult season where many parents are juggling kids and working from home, our “new normal” is anything but normal. Parents are asking, “How do I stop kids interrupting conference calls?” It’s hard to know how to respond to the challenges of interrupted conference calls. But this can be a great opportunity to help kids feel both loved and successful. Applying the Connected Families Framework for parenting can equip you to Connect, Coach, and Correct from a foundation of Safety. (This article is also available as an audio or video download.)…
May 19, 2020
Is Your Child Refusing to Do Schoolwork? | Ep. 32
8:47
Is your child refusing to do schoolwork? What can you do? Many parents are feeling the pressure of “crisis schooling,” and children are struggling to find motivation for their schoolwork. Though doing school at home may have initially been appealing, the novelty (for most) is wearing off.  Kids have been cooped up at home. Whatever novelty there was to doing school at home has now worn off. In this article (also available in video or audio download), learn practical ideas to empathize, encourage, and empower (problem-solve). You can bring more joy into your child’s educational experience.  Check what’s going on…
May 13, 2020
Help Your Struggling Child Grieve His Pre-Coronavirus Life | Ep. 31
8:35
Like many of us, your child might be grieving his pre-coronavirus life. This challenging time can bring strong emotions to the surface in our kids (and in us as parents). These emotions can be signs of a child’s underlying grief. And difficulty in expressing that grief.  Read on to learn why it’s important to allow your children to grieve, and healthy ways to help them process their grief. This article is also available as a video or audio download. Why is it important for our children to grieve? We’re hearing from a lot of parents whose kids still aren’t adjusting…
May 06, 2020
How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids | Ep. 30
6:50
Are you “walking on eggshells” with restless, homebound kids? Do your kids have a case of “Grumpy Child Syndrome”? Your family may need an extra dose of a healthy sensory diet. What is a sensory diet? Why is it important? And how can you incorporate it in practical ways with your kids? Read on. (This article is also available in video or audio download.) In the midst of current uncertainties, we may find ourselves encountering grumpy kids. (We may even admit to experiencing some grumpy feelings of our own!) There is nothing wrong with you or your kids.  Just like…
Apr 28, 2020
What You Misunderstand About Your Misbehaving Child | Ep. 29
9:20
If you’ve got a child that seems to be misbehaving more than usual, you’re not alone. These are trying times. If your child seems to be acting out all of a sudden, you might have a Stressed, Anxious, or Discouraged (SAD) child. You can be a person of peace in the midst of chaos. You can understand your misbehaving child. The current challenges of staying at home can cause even more distress for a child who is already intense and sensitive. A struggling child can increase tension in an already stressful situation. In this article, also available as a video…
Apr 21, 2020
Am I a Bad Parent?
8:19
You are not a bad parent. Start learning how to stop parenting out of guilt or anxiety. This content is also available in an audio version.  When we’re in crisis, the voices built most deeply in us come out. Sometimes that can be positive. Other times it turns self-critical.  Instead of blaming ourselves, we can remind our hearts that we are created in God’s image to do good works. We can be vessels of God’s grace and presence to our families during this difficult time.  Look for the bright spots in your parenting As hard as it may be to…
Apr 14, 2020
“God is Always Up to Something!” | Ep. 27
8:22
NOTE: This content is available as a video,  a blog post (below), or a 7-minute podcast. We trust this will serve every situation and learning style well. Here at Connected Families we realize this is a tough time for many in our community and in the world as a whole. In response to the current pandemic, we sent out a survey last week to hear, “What is it like to be you?” The response was overwhelming, with a thousand parents responding in just a little over a day. People shared a wide range of responses: About 15% of you said…
Apr 08, 2020
Guiding Kids to Right Their Wrongs | Ep. 26
23:04
When your kids misbehave, and you need to discipline them, have you considered what they are learning? Are they learning to submit to angry power? Or, perhaps, are they learning how to get better at hiding their misbehavior and sin? Guiding kids to right their wrongs is no easy task. Most families have one child that demands more of our parenting energy. Is that child hearing an unspoken (or spoken!) message that he/she is a “problem child”? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into the “Correct” level of our framework – teaching the message,…
Apr 01, 2020
Mentoring Our Kids in Skills, Wisdom and Faith | Ep. 25
22:09
What skills would you like your kids to have when they go out into the world? Should you drop what you’re doing to bring them something they forgot? How can you prepare your kids for conflicts they will certainly encounter in their relationships, family, and work environments later in life? What does it look like to mentor our kids? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, explore what it means to have a vision for your family and give practical ideas for ways to mentor your kids in skills, wisdom, and faith. In this podcast you’ll…
Mar 25, 2020
Connecting With Your Kids…Especially When They Struggle | Ep. 24
23:57
You may have heard, “Move TOWARD the struggling child.” This phrase might seem counter-intuitive. Often, when our child is struggling, the last thing we want to do is connect with them.  When we show love unconditionally, especially when our kids misbehave, they will then genuinely understand that our love cannot be earned. And that our love is not reserved exclusively for when they are obedient, helpful, or behaving in the way we want. Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they discuss what it looks like to make sure our kids know we not only love them…
Mar 18, 2020
Walking in Peace and Joy with Your Kids | Ep. 23
23:12
We all want a peaceful home where kids feel safe. But sometimes safety is hard to attain, especially when life is stressful. How do we respond during hard parenting moments? How can we do better at walking in peace and joy with our kids? In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into creating a culture of safety at home. Applying what you learn as you listen can impact your family for generations to come. In this podcast you’ll learn to: look inward and ask the question, “What’s going on in ME?”. build a strong foundation…
Mar 11, 2020
Find Your Parenting Balance | Ep. 22
22:59
How do you define yourself as a parent? Do you feel stuck in your parenting and want to explore a new way?  In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, are excited to introduce you to a structured framework for parenting that can help bring balance to your parenting. You CAN find balance between grace and consequences while teaching your kids wisdom, values, and faith. This podcast can bring balance to your parenting: learn the origins of the Connected Families Framework and how Jim and Lynne came up with the idea. be introduced to a structure you…
Mar 04, 2020
Families on Purpose | Ep. 21
23:52
The most successful companies usually have clear cut goals and strategies to accomplish those goals. However, most families float through life haphazardly. When families get dangerously off track, parents often say, “I just don’t know how we got here.” A lack of intentionality is often implicated when families’ find themselves sinking or even shipwrecked.  In this podcast, Jim Jackson and Chad Hayenga will challenge you to have a plan to move your family forward with purpose. In this podcast about family purpose you will:   Discover practical ways to keep this from happening to your family Be inspired to instill a…
Feb 05, 2020
Your kids? They’re watching. ALL the time. | Ep. 20
23:55
In this podcast, Chad Hayenga and Jim Jackson will challenge you to think through what you’re modeling as you parent. They’ll equip you with natural, effective ways to “live your life out loud” in a manner that builds faith and wisdom in your kids.  You’ll come away with: practical tips on how to make prayer natural with your kids. ideas on how to guide great dinner table conversations. simple ways to keep kids engaged when you read the Bible.  You may be intimidated by the idea of leading your kids to Jesus. The staff at church seems so much better…
Jan 29, 2020
Honoring Our Imperfect Dads | Ep. 19
24:49
If you’ve struggled in your relationship with one (or both!) of your parents, this podcast can give life-changing insight. Hurt and resentment left to brew under the surface can often perpetuate the effects of sin passing from one generation to another.  In this podcast, Jim shares his process of working through very difficult feelings and dynamics in his relationship with his dad. This enabled him to get to a place of an affectionate, grace-filled, restored relationship. As mentioned in this fall 2019 blog post, he learned to apply the Connected Families Framework with his own parents. In this podcast: You’ll…
Jan 22, 2020
When Doing My Best Isn’t Good Enough | Ep. 18
21:47
In this podcast episode, Jim and Chad take a deeper dive into the dynamics of dads’ good intentions with their kids. If you sometimes feel like you’re doing your best and it’s just not good enough, be encouraged and equipped by the ideas in this practical podcast. In this podcast you’ll: listen as Jim shares some helpful insights from his own relationship with his dad.  hear a roleplay illustrating typical default parenting and the messages kids may actually be receiving. be given examples demonstrating how to communicate messages of grace and truth to your kids in clear and practical ways.…
Jan 15, 2020
Leading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17
23:45
Join Jim Jackson, Connected Families co-founder, and Chad Hayenga, LMFT, Certified Life Coach and parent coach, for this first episode in a 5-part series for dads. Moms, of course you’re welcome to listen! But Jim and Chad will be addressing specific issues unique to dads.   Often dads are working outside the home and that can bring unique challenges. It’s easy to carry stress from work into the pressure cooker of home. Dads frequently, not always, feel they need to use strong authority to manage conflict in the family. The messages dads want to convey are often not the ones that…
Jan 07, 2020
Family Gatherings | Ep. 16
22:26
You’ve just had a family event and might still be recovering from the overt or passive-aggressive comments from extended family about your kids’ behavior and your parenting choices. Family gatherings can be HARD…especially if we sense that external pressure is shifting our parenting style to avoid criticism.  On this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson tackle this tough and timely issue. In today’s episode you’ll learn: How to graciously talk to your parents (or other family members) about your parenting goals How to stay consistent and confident in your own parenting How to prep your kids for success at family gatherings…
Dec 04, 2019
Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15
15:54
In this podcast, Jim Jackson interviews Stacy Bellward, online course moderator, in a fun and heartfelt conversation. (Find out what even got Jim a little teary!)  You’ll get the real scoop on the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course, so you can know whether or not it’s a fit for you and your family. In this 15-minute podcast we explore: the history behind the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course. how Stacy went from being a student (2014), to moderating (2015), to project managing and producing the updated version (2018). what impact the DTC…
Sep 25, 2019
Teaching Kids to Be Responsible for Their Actions | Ep. 14
18:15
Today, Stacy Bellward interviews Jim and Lynne Jackson as they dive deep into ways to correct kids’ misbehavior with the message, “You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions”. Misbehavior is like the tip of the iceberg. If we make misbehavior our primary focus we miss guiding our children toward lasting change and growth. During this episode, all four parts of the Connected Families Framework are brought together.  “You are SAFE with me.”  What’s going on with me?  Can I exchange my inner angst for God’s grace and truth so my child feels safe?  “You are LOVED no matter what.” Express unconditional…
Sep 18, 2019
Communicating Love in the Midst of Misbehavior | Ep. 12
27:31
Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson to talk about a message that is essential for discipline situations: You are LOVED no matter what!  Why is this necessary? Don’t kids already know they are loved? During the frustration of misbehavior, kids can easily internalize a perception that their parents don’t like them. If we don’t intentionally communicate the message “You are LOVED no matter what” during challenges, kids will only become more discouraged. And if they believe they have to perform well to be loved, that can weave insecurity into the very fabric of their lives. In this…
Sep 04, 2019
What Does It Mean to Be an Emotionally Safe Parent? | Ep. 11
18:58
Being an emotionally safe parent is not about being soft or lenient. It’s also not suppressing our anxiety and frustration and trying to look calm when we discipline our kids. If we engage with a heart attitude of “What is wrong with you?!” our kids won’t feel safe with us.  The starting place for making your home a safe haven is to take an honest look at how you might be contributing to the conflict with your child.  When you engage with a heart of grace and a sense of purpose for the discipline situation, it’s much easier to help…
Aug 28, 2019
My Child Will Not Get Ready for School On Time | Ep. 10
23:30
We’re in back-to-school season, bringing all the joy and anxiety that comes with it. One question we hear when we talk with parents is, “What do I do when my child won’t get ready for school on time?” This week Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT and parent coach about how to respond in a kind, but firm, way to this high-stress time of day.  Short answer: The natural impact, without parental intervention, is what will be the greatest teacher.   Listen in as we explore a deeper dive into this frustrating issue:  Step 1 – IDENTIFY: Be…
Aug 21, 2019
My Child Hits Me | Ep. 9
21:57
Your child is escalating quickly and you have a pretty good idea where this is headed. You know the scenario…the anger turns to screaming, which then becomes a full-blown tantrum.  Pretty soon your child hits YOU. In today’s episode Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Lynne Jackson, OTR as she helps to answer the question: “What should I do when my child is so out of control they hit me?!” She draws on her occupational therapy knowledge to help us understand how brain function impacts this tough dilemma. The quick answer: Work to figure out and verbalize what your child’s…
Aug 14, 2019
My Tween Wants to Quit Music Lessons | Ep. 8
22:44
“I don’t WANT to practice my trumpet.” “My piano teacher is mean!” “I don’t have time to practice with all this homework. I want to quit!”  Sound familiar? In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT and parent coach to explore how our parenting framework gives insight into the question: ”What should I do when my tween wants to quit music lessons?” Quick answer: In most cases, help your child understand that it’s important to stick to their commitments (for the duration of that commitment), and provide the support your child needs.  Listen to our full…
Aug 06, 2019
My Child Lies to Me | Ep. 7
18:48
Your child has just told you something you are pretty sure is not truthful.  What should you do? Do you call them out on it? Should there a serious consequence?  In today’s podcast episode Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT, and parent coach. Together they tackle the challenging question: “What should I do when my child lies to me?”  The quick answer is:  Think of your big reactions like fertilizer. If you put big emotional intensity into calling out lying, you’re likely to get more of it. Take notice when your child tells the truth and give…
Jul 31, 2019
My Child Says, “I Hate You!” | Ep. 6
18:34
Words are powerful.  We can so easily take it personally when we hear hurtful words from our children like,  “I HATE YOU!” But instead of reacting in frustration and anger, we encourage you to look below the surface. There may be deep reasons why the child might feel anxious, discouraged or ashamed in a way that is coming out in those aggressive words.  Jim Jackson and Stacy Bellward welcome Lynne Jackson, OTR and parent coach to the show. Lynne is an occupational therapist and brings practical brain-based knowledge and years of experience to this topic.  Today’s episode covers: underlying causes including…
Jul 24, 2019
My Kids Won't Do Chores Without Nagging
22:42
Have you ever wondered, “My child can’t manage to even take the garbage out. How will she ever survive in adulthood?” Or, maybe it sounds more like, “I do so much for these kids. Why can’t they do a few simple things to help out?!” Today’s episode is loaded with tools and will give you a lot to think about as Jim Jackson and Stacy Bellward talk with Connected Families parent coach Chad Hayenga and pull apart the question, “What should I do when my kids won’t do their chores without my nagging?” In today’s episode you’ll learn: Effective use…
Jul 17, 2019
My Kids Fight All the Time! | Ep. 4
19:07
It’s summer and the kids are home from school. Is the constant fighting and bickering more than you can take?  This week we welcome Lynne Jackson, parent coach and co-founder of Connected Families. She brings stories and practical solutions you can apply (today!) to the sibling conflict in your home. Your big take-away from this podcast:  Enter with big, sincere empathy for both kids (conflict is hard!) and then, as they begin to settle down, guide them toward their own solution.  To help make this practical we’ll introduce you to The Peace Process. This will give you a simple and…
Jul 10, 2019
I Feel Overwhelmed and Hopeless
20:05
Parenting is hard. It takes everything we have…and then some. What happens when we get to the point of feeling totally overwhelmed and hopeless? On this Connected Families Podcast episode, we discuss these overwhelmed feelings, pull them apart, and ask what we can do about them.  Our guest today is parenting coach and Connected Families co-founder, Lynne Jackson. Lynne clearly remembers the times she felt overwhelmed and hopeless as she raised her three rambunctious kids. She will bring practical ideas to encourage you today.  In this podcast we discuss: how expectations can feed feelings of hopelessness. the idea behind toxic…
Jul 03, 2019
My Child Won’t Get Off Screens | Ep. 2
22:32
SCREEN TIME!!! It’s a persistent battle in almost every home. And it is one of the questions we receive most frequently. What should you do when your child constantly asks you for screen time?  And more screen time? We expand on the following three ideas in this podcast: Get yourself calm. Be clear about expectations, and what will happen if expectations aren’t met. Hold kids accountable to meet those expectations in a way that gains, not loses, kids’ respect. Your calm respectfulness gives weight to your authority so you can hold your kids accountable. Might sound simple, but what does…
Jun 26, 2019
My Child Won’t Calm Down | Ep. 1
23:39
“My child won’t calm down!” Have you ever said these words? Perhaps even this morning? 😉 On this Connected Families Podcast episode we discuss this relevant parenting concern and provide steps that you can take to move forward with grace and connection. Our guest today is parenting expert, and Connected Families co-founder, Lynne Jackson, OTR. Lynne brings practical tips that you can use and a deeper understanding around the brain science of meltdowns. She’ll help you explore the questions: What is going on with me?!? What is going on with my child? How should I respond when my child won’t…
Jun 19, 2019
Connected Families Podcast
37
Welcome to the Connected Families Podcast! We are committed to bringing you content that will challenge, encourage, and equip you to be the thoughtful and confident parent you long to be.  Beginning June 19th, the Connected Families podcast will be coming your way! Season 1 explores the question, “What should I do when…..?” . Subscribe on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts. Or share your name and email address below to ensure that each and every episode lands in your inbox. Season 1 asks the question: “What should I do when….?”  Episode 1 – June 19, 2019 – My child…
May 21, 2019
WHAT-EVER!! Ideas for Responding to Sass with Class
7:16
What-EVER! (with an eye roll) You’ve seen it a hundred, maybe even a thousand times. Your child doesn’t like what you’ve said and responds with a head tilt, and eye roll, and the grand pronouncement, “What-EVER!!!!” What do you do when this happens? The tendency is to shut it down, NOW!  But your angry response communicates to your child that she is in control of your emotions. This gives her the “powerjolt” she needs to pull this behavior out again the next time she’s frustrated with you. In this Q & A, Jim and Lynne take 7 minutes to respond…
Jul 11, 2018