This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast special episode for 7/10/2020.

Editor-in-Chief Kyle Mann and Creative Director Ethan Nicolle are joined by The Babylon Bee Senior Writer Frank J. Fleming to talk about the week’s big stories.  Frank has a new book Superego: Fathom which is a sequel to Superego.  They talk about the week’s big stories like Kanye West declaring a run for the Presidency, how modern Americans are definitely morally superior to slaveowners from 200 years ago, and why a Russian grandmother was caught smearing poo on playground swings.  They also talk about how the rich and the powerful can say whatever they want and then in the subscriber portion talk about all of Frank’s problematic writings.

Show Outline

Introduction

Kyle and Ethan come down from their high of celebrating freedom by almost blowing themselves up and letting their kids play with fire.

Weird News

Driver fights off snake with just a knife and seatbelt while speeding at 76mph

Germany goes nuts over sausage vending machines

Alligator with missing limbs shows up on Florida family's porch

Escaped pigs cause traffic chaos on Virginia highway

Cat falls asleep in washing machine and miraculously survives 12-minute cycle

Woman, 90, caught smearing 'poo' on children's swings in bizarre protest

• Stomach-churning footage shows an elderly woman smearing what appears to human faeces on a children's swing she wants removed.
• Gavin Newsom could do this. Layering the skateparks with excrement.

Married woman, 32, used doctored baby scans bought on eBay to fool her 18-year-old lover into thinking he was the father of her child and let his family bring the boy up as one of their own

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes Robot Jox.

Ethan likes The Napoleon of Notting Hill by Chesterton.

Frank likes Hamilton.

Stories of the Week

Story 1 - Kanye West Seizes Opportunity To Be Most Rational, Coherent Presidential Candidate

Summary: Noticing a lack of rational, coherent, sane presidential candidates, Kanye West announced this weekend that he will be running for president. The move surprised everyone who hasn't been paying attention to 2020 at all so far.

The real story: Kanye West actually announced his presidential run -- though it’s not clear if he can actually still run.

• The Forbes interview

Story 2 - Nation That Kills 3,000 Babies A Day Feels Morally Superior To Slaveowners From 200 Years Ago

Summary: Leftists who support killing 3,000 babies a day were trying to virtue-signal but quickly ran into a problem: there's no one alive to whom they can feel morally superior. So, the movement was forced to look to people from 200 years ago to find someone they could somewhat credibly criticize for moral failings: slave owners

• What is it about humanity that makes us think the sins of other ages are so much worse than the sins of our age?
• Most people go with the crowd, how do you know you would not?
• It is like Chesteron’s picture of the cad who climbs up to the top of a castle turret then kicks down all ladders that got him there. 
• Real abolitionists who paid the price at the time 

Story 3 - New App Reminds You To Look Up From Your Phone To Check If Your Kids Are Still Alive

Summary: The tech world is abuzz after the announcement of a new smartphone app that could save millions of lives. The new app, called Kid-Alyve, will remind parents to look up from their phones every so often to confirm that their children are still breathing.

-Parenting is crazy

Topic of the Week

Cancel Culture / Harper’s Letter

Hate Mail

LOVE MAIL

Subscriber Portion

Bonus Frank Stories And The Ten Questions

Story 1

Innovative New Process Turns Vegetables into Meat by Feeding Them to Cows

Story 2

Superman Criticized for Unrealistic Portrayal of Journalist as Heroic

Story 3

Retraction: Those Kids We Accused Of Holding A KKK Rally Were Actually Just Playing Duck, Duck, Goose

This is the Babylon Bee Interview Show.

Editor-in-chief Kyle Man and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Drew Dyck about whether criminals are real, being saved from a life of stealing deodorant, and invading Canada. Drew is an acquisitions editor at Moody Publishers and a contributing editor at CTPastors.com, a Christianity Today publication for church leaders. He’s the author of Your Future Self Will Thank You: Secrets to Self-Control from the Bible and Brain Science, Yawning at Tigers: You Can’t Tame God, So Stop Trying, and Generation Ex-Christian: Why Young Adults Are Leaving the Church…and how to Bring Them Back.

Topics Discussed

• Sending your book ideas to Drew
• Arguing with people on Twitter about abolishing the police and whether criminals are a thing
• Spicing up your testimony by stealing deodorant
• Milk in a bag
• The weirdest thing about Canada
• Portland is stuck in the 90s/Portlandia
• On the difference between a beat poet and a slam poet
• When bookstores were a thing
• Christian stores bestselling “Jesus junk”
• Where ANTIFA will set up their gulags
• God isn’t safe but he’s good, like Aslan
• Self-control in everything but buying Drew’s books
• Mental illness in the church
• Remembering the Emerging Church movement
• What’s better: fur babies or actual babies
• Writers retreats never help
• On not psychologizing your opponents
• The Ten Questions

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast special episode for 7/3/2020.

This episode is brought to you by Faithful Counseling. Bee listeners get 10% off!

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the week’s big stories like a man being fined £450 for provocative intestinal wind, the fallen world we live in where The Princess Bride is possibly being remade, and how doctors are recommending we keep opening up and closing the economy until we all go insane. In the main topic, they read G.K. Chesterton's ideas on the suicide of thought.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan dive in into the mail bag, talk about their years in ministry, and bring in producer Dan so that they all can answer the ten questions.

Show Outline

Introduction

Kyle and Ethan return from the warm, sunny beaches of Florida to churn out another podcast. We have an update on the 'Best of the Bee' book.

Weird News

• Broody mother goose has taken 47 babies under her wing - and they're so cute

  • “This phenomenon is known as a gang brood"

• Man falls through floor of home, plunges down 30-foot well
• Pair hired for man's broom sexual fantasy turn up in bedroom at wrong address with machetes
• In fart news: Man fined £450 for 'provocative' fart in front of police officers
• Newton's recipe for 'toad vomit lozenges' up for auction

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes Dead Cells the video game.

Ethan likes WACO on Netflix.

Stories of the Week

Story 1

Equality At Last: Disney Confirms Winnie The Pooh Will Now Be Voiced By An Actual Bear

Summary: In order to ensure that voice actors only portray characters they actually look like, Disney announced this week that Winnie the Pooh will now be voiced by an actual bear.

The real story: Several voice actors have stopped voicing characters that are not the same race they are. The Simpsons, Big Mouth, American Dad, Cleveland Show.

Story 2

Doctors Recommend Locking Down And Reopening Repeatedly Until Everyone Has Nervous Breakdown

Summary: A survey of leading physicians unanimously agreed that the best response to COVID-19 is for the government to lock everything down, then reopen, then lock down again, then reopen again and to just keep doing that until everyone completely loses their minds.

Story 3

Merciful God Vows To End Humanity Before 'The Princess Bride' Can Be Remade

Summary: Upon rumors of a remake of The Princess Bride, a spokesperson for the Almighty God confirmed that He will end the world in fire before He would ever allow that to happen.

Topic of the Week

Kyle and Ethan read a portion of G.K. Chesterton's Orthodoxy on the suicide of thought and discuss its relevance in our times of constant revolutionary agitation. 

Hate Mail

Someone went to home depot and bought a whole bunch of flowerbeds.

Subscriber Portion

Kyle and Ethan dive into the mail bag, talk about their years in ministry, and have producer Dan join them to answer the ten questions. Subscribers, get to know the Bee boys.

Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Costi Hinn, nephew of notorious faith healer Benny Hinn. After leaving that ministry behind, Costi Hinn is now a pastor at Redeemer Bible Church in Gilbert, Arizona. He is the author of God, Greed, and the (Prosperity) Gospel. They talk about Costi’s childhood living large like a Kardashian, learning about a different gospel from a pink study bible, and what goes on behind the scenes of a prominent prosperity gospel ministry.

Topics Discussed

• Going straight into the deep end of Calvinism because of a pink MacArthur study bible
• A day in the life of Benny Hinn- what’s it like to have a personal duster?
• On growing up as a Hinn was a Kardashian lifestyle
• The prosperity gospel vs the Biblical gospel
• On batting 0.068 slaying people in the spirit and only “healing” one guy
• What went on behind the scenes at these healing events?
• Not raising a hand against the Lord’s Anointed, even if they happen to be creeps just claiming to have the anointing
•  On whether prosperity health-and-wealth healers sincerely believe their own message or if they just cashing in
• On Benny Hinn’s occasional “repentance” on the prosperity gospel
• New wave prosperity preachers and the old generals
• The Ten Questions

See also: Benny Hinn is my uncle, but Prosperity Gospel is not for me

A few Babylon Bee articles on Benny Hinn:

Benny Hinn Holds Healing Service In Full Hazmat Suit

Benny Hinn Loses Control Of Powers, Sends Audience Member Soaring Hundreds Of Feet Into Air

Benny Hinn Spends Another Long Day At Children's Hospital Healing Kids

Benny Hinn Attempts Jedi Mind Trick On IRS Agents Investigating His Ministry

Benny Hinn Miraculously Removes Lump From Woman's Purse

Benny Hinn Added To 'Smash Bros.' Roster

Benny Hinn Masterfully Knocks Down Audience Members Arranged In Notoriously Difficult 7–10 Split

I Honestly Can Not Believe I'm Still Getting Away With This

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome guest host Kira Davis who is editor-at-large at RedState. They talk about the difference between protesting and rioting, some problems Kira sees with the approach of Candace Owens, and how we need to have a reality show where everyone gets stuck in an elevator with someone they hate until we achieve world peace.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle, Ethan, and Kira talk about Black Lives Matter (as an organization and as a movement), where peace is found in this world, how Kanye is buying up Wyoming, serial killers, sending kids off to college, and that Trump photo-op with the Bible.

Kira can be regularly heard on her podcast Just Listen To Yourself.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Show Outline

Introduction

Kyle, Ethan, and Kira talk about the weird “pacman” masks that allow the coronavirus conscious person to eat out at their favorite restaurant and how Kyle has never seen a Tarantino movie.  

Main Topics

• Kira Davis has some disagreements with Candace Owens.
• Kira Davis responds to Ethan’s 13 year old daughter on issues of social justice, race, and protests.

Paid-subscriber portion

• Black Lives Matter
• Trump Photo Op 

Also mentioned on the podcast: Just Listen To Yourself With Kira Davis- Episode 37- Black Lives Matter

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Kyle and Ethan talk to Dinesh D’Souza. He has been called a far right provocateur and is a filmmaker and the author of several books, most recently United States of Socialism. They talk about socialism, identity politics, and whether or not it’s okay to laugh at Apu.

Watch or listen to this episode on our podcast page, where subscribers can find full length episodes, or over on our YouTube channel. Subscribe using your favorite podcast platform here.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• Dinesh gives a rundown on the new socialists

• What’s the difference between identity socialism and classic socialism?

• Socialists abandoning the working class

• The decline of Christianity in the culture and the rise of a new religion in the Left

• Virtue signalling versus actual virtue

• Debating libs vs debating atheists

• Dinesh’s new book and what it’s all about

• Is it okay to laugh at Apu?

• Defending morphing Abraham Lincoln’s face into Donald Trump’s

• Dating Ann Coulter

Paid-subscriber portion

• The Ten Questions

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee Podcast, Kyle and Ethan celebrate the one year anniversary of the show and welcome Kyle’s dad, Brent, for Father’s Day. They talk shop about duck tape, flashlights, initialisms, rocket science, and dad hacks. They also dive into the week's news stories. Kyle and Ethan enlighten Brent on what CHAZ or CHOP is, and then discuss Elon Musk's quest to occupy Mars, and an aerospace engineer’s perspective on seeing God in creation.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Show Outline

Introduction

Today on The Babylon Bee Podcast, we welcome Brent Mann, Kyle’s dad. It’s Father’s Day and we celebrate the Babylon Bee Podcast’s one year anniversary!

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes Avatar: The Last Airbender.

Ethan likes Rifftrax.

Brent likes Columbo. Remember Columbo?

Weird News

• Mum renovating home finds 'clever' tip from previous owner under old wallpaper 

  Florida man fist-fights alligator to save dog

• Deer runs into Black Lives Matter protest in New Jersey, seriously injuring woman

  Teen fell into coma after having bubble tea twice a day for a month

• South Carolina police seek couple accused of holding Pizza Hut manager at gunpoint, stealing Pepsi

• German police: Petty thief fled supermarket, forgot his son 

Story 1

Trump Enacts Tariffs, Travel Ban On CHAZ

Summary: Trump has announced a new set of tariffs and a travel ban on CHAZ, escalating the trade war between the United States and the fledgling nation-state.

The real story:  An "autonomous zone" or Occupy Protest and sprung up in Seattle complete with warlords, speech codes, segregated gardens, calls for foreign aid from its capitalist neighbors, and brutal community policing tactics.

Story 2

Study: Average Father Spends 97% Of Time Running Around House Turning Lights Off

Summary: A new study of fatherhood in America found that the average dad spends up to 97% of his time running around the house turning off lights that the rest of the family left on.

The real story: Kyle's dad has an ingenious solution to teach your kids to not leave the lights on.

Topic of the Week

It's Father's Day! Kyle, Ethan, and aerospace engineer Brent (Kyle's Dad) talk about all sorts of stuff like dad jokes, initialisms and acronyms, Brent's work on the Space Shuttle program, Elon Musk's amazing space feats, and a few of Brent's fatherly quirks like how he carries a really old cell phone in a ziplock bag.

Hate Mail

A recent article made some very overworked and stressed booksellers very angry.

Subscriber Portion

Ethan and Brent talk bladder blabber when Kyle leaves the room, and then they continue going through Brent's box of stuff he brought in, and finish by talking about more dad hacks and stories, including the time when Brent acted out a scene from The Bourne Identity to chase down a bicycle thief.

Also mentioned on the podcast: Fingerprint of God: Recent Scientific Discoveries Reveal the Unmistakable Identity of the Creator by Hugh Ross

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Things get downright puritanical when Kyle and Ethan talk to Nate Pickowicz and Dustin Benge about their new book The American Puritans. Dustin is Provost and lecturer and Union School of Theology and Nate is pastor of Harvest Bible Church. Dustin and Nate talk about the inspiration that they draw today from the lives of these men and women and their religious movement in church history while Kyle and Ethan try to figure out why someone would name their kid ‘If-Christ-had-not-died-for-thee-thou-hadst-been-damned’ and whether it’s true that Puritans invented tablecloths to cover up scandalous table legs.  

Topics Discussed

• The difference between Puritans and Pilgrims

• Puritan theology: Are sinners in the hands of an angry God?

• Myth or fact: Puritan edition

• Puritans’ favorite alcoholic beverage

• Some church history of the Puritans in England and in America

• Strange Puritan names like ‘Praise-God’ and ‘Fly Fornication’

• People walking stark naked through church and cutting off Quaker ears

• Some of the Puritans highlighted in their new book The American Puritans

• Kyle and Ethan provoke some baptist answers to The Ten Questions in the Subscriber Portion!

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like how religious gathers and pretending to be protests so they can meet, our recent feud over putting Trump in an AWANA vest, and how all of a sudden defunding the police became a national talking point. Detective Dan from Small Town Dicks joins Kyle and Ethan to talk all about it.

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to listen to Kyle and Ethan continue their conversation with Detective Dan!

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Show Outline

Introduction

Kyle's dad burns podcasts onto CDs and Ethan diagnoses depression in dads stemming from how children handle blu ray discs.

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes O.C. Supertones album For the Glory

Ethan likes Mac Smith’s Scurry.

This News Is Weird

Man charged with assault after thrown pickle hits Vermont highway worker

Peruvian mayor poses as corpse to avoid arrest for flouting coronavirus lockdown, reports say

Ocean Just as Gross as You Thought: Filled with Mucus

Doctors remove mobile phone charger from man's bladde

Crayola launches skin tone crayons so 'all kids can colour themselves

Seagull flies into woman's house and vomits on her kitchen counter

Stories of the Week

Story 1 

Clever Churchgoers Avoid Arrest By Disguising Themselves As Rioters
Summary: Many churches still aren’t gathering in person but several congregations came up with a clever way to avoid arrest for gathering against government orders: disguising themselves as rioters.

The real story: Governments seemed to be going hard after churches and other things deemed non-essential, but anything related to protesting was fine.

• Originally a satire of how apparently COVID wasn’t a concern for anything related to the protest.

• A thousand medical experts signed an open letter supporting public gathering for protests stating that “white supremacy contributes to COVID and is a lethal public health issue”

• Churches were/are still fighting to open and trying to comply with lots of extra rules they needed to follow such as limited capacity, masks, no physical contact, some were saying no communion elements, no singing.

• A prophecy fulfilled. A group of Hasidic youth in NYC put up a George Floyd sign so that they could not be shut down by the cops for their religious gathering. 

Story 2

Trump Shows Off Completed Awana Vest

Summary: President Trump and Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi are firing Bible photo ops back and forth, as you would expect politicians to be doing at a time like this. But Trump won the contest of Bible knowledge by showing off his completed Awana Sparks vest.

The real story: Trump decided to walk across the street from the White House to the Episcopalian church St. John’s (“The church of the Presidents”) which rioters had set on fire the night before. He did this as a show of resolve against the lawlessness which would lead to the burning of churches.  He drew criticism for supposedly using police to drive away protestors with “teargas” for the photo op and for the way he stood in front of the church and held up the Bible like it was a political prop. 

• We decided to poke fun of the pandering-ness and the Bible being used as a prop by Trump and then Pelosi and then Cuomo all suddenly being experts on the Bible in all these weird public events quoting verses and making the Bible agree with their side

• We put an AWANA vest on Trump, which prompted an email from AWANA communications chief asking us to immediately pull it down as it was “beyond satire” and how they didn’t want their vest to be on Donald Trump. They threatened to sue us if we didn’t comply.

• Seth put AWANA on blast on Twitter

• We learned Monday that they would NOT be pursuing a lawsuit

• Kyle's Awana stories!

• Ethan just hated Awana  

Story 3 

Los Angeles Police To Undergo Intensive Socially Conscious Slam Poetry Training 

Summary: As public demand for comprehensive police reform grows, the LAPD is leading the way by training its officers in socially conscious slam poetry.

The Real Story: BLM protests are demanding #DefundThePolice… the details are vague but it sounds like they want to get rid of the police altogether in some instances.

• Marriane Williamson has a great tweet about the ex-cops starting ISIS.

• Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey was publicly mocked and shamed at a protest when he refused to say he would abolish the police..

  • Here is his walk of shame. “Go Home Jacob!” “Shame! Shame!”

  • The Minneapolis city council just voted 9-3 vowing to DISBAND their city police department and council president Lisa Bender told crowds that these 9 members were “committed to ending the city’s relationship with the police force and “to end policing as we know it and recreate systems that actually keep us safe.”

    • Has this been done anywhere before?  Camden, NJ

    • “ the city's police department was disbanded and replaced with a new one covering Camden County that had more officers, but on lower pay, according to a City Lab report.”

• A CNN anchor, Aislyn Camerota asked city council President Lisa Bender “who do I call when someone breaks into my house?” and she  said that that question comes from a place of privilege 

• She later went on Chris Cuomo’s Prime time and said a "police free future" is "the goal."

• We also did a CFA joke, but Ethan hates them. 

Topic of the Week

Detective Dan of Small Town Dicks joins Kyle and Ethan to talk about all the police issues facing the nation. Dan was formerly a K9 handler and Violent Crimes detective at the same Small Town police department as his twin brother Dave, who also hosts the podcast with Yeardlley Smith of the Simpsons. Dan regards his years as a K9 handler to be the most rewarding of his career. He is now retired. They discuss misconceptions about the police and discuss changes we need to make to serve and protect everyone.

Hate Mail

We get an email filled with flowerbeds.

Paid-subscriber portion

Kyle and Ethan continue their conversation with Detective Dan.

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Kyle and Ethan talk to Connor Boyack!  Connor Boyack is president and founder of the Libertas Institute. He is best known for writing the Tuttle Twins series of books, which focus on introducing kids to the ideas of liberty and the free market. Kyle and Ethan talk about weed-smoking Mormons, how many wives a man can have in an anarchist utopia, and pouring libertarian fertilizer on the saplings rather than trying to save the old, diseased statist trees. 

Topics Discussed

• What are the Tuttle Twins series of books about

• What is Libertarianism all about and what on earth is the deal with the Libertarian Party

• Does a libertarian Mormon smoke weed?

• Indoctrinating children with foreign ideas like "liberty" and introducing them to books by dead white guys

• Isn’t it a bad idea to teach children about liberty since as parents we want to tell them what to do?

• How many wives would each man be allowed to have in a libertarian utopia?

• The polygamy case, where children were taken from their parents, that Connor worked on

• The ten questions!

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like our cities burning down, the most righteous heroes of the riots, SpaceX scrubbing a launch because of a nosy Karen, and all our politicians suddenly became Bible experts overnight.  Be sure to stick around for the main topic where two white guys decide to talk about critical race theory in the church and society, because why not? 

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to listen to Kyle and Ethan dive headfirst into the mailbag and talk about even more stories!

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Show Outline

Introduction

We are out of quarantine and into curfew, but at least we have new swag for the office.

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes Brave Ollie Possum: the audio book.

Ethan likes his own Spotify playlist: Every Song Is Perfect.

This News Is Weird

'The bird is free': India 'releases Pakistani pigeon held on spying charges'

Knocking on Florida couple's door were two alligators fighting 

Monkeys attack lab worker, steal COVID-19 blood test samples 

Turtle crashes through windshield on Georgia highway

Scientists say they went 'cuckoo' due to laughing gas from penguin poo

Five-year-old pulled over by cops on his way to buy a Lamborghini

Stories of the Week

Story 1 

Powerful: Protesters Spell Out 'Love' With Burning Homes And Businesses

Summary: In a powerful display of love and tolerance, peaceful protesters in Minneapolis burned several city blocks so the fire would read “LOVE” from the air. Wow. Such love. Much peace.

The real story: Riots have engulfed the country. It seems like overnight COVID-19 disappeared and were replaced with absolute mayhem everywhere. The riots are over the wrongful death of George Floyd, who was killed by a police officer who had his knee on his neck for nine minutes. (We’ll discuss more in the main topic.)

• Top 10 heroes of the riots

• Somehow Chris Matthews and Chris Hanson both make an appearance

Story 2

SpaceX Launch Scrubbed After Local Karen Calls The Cops

Summary: SpaceX had tried to launch a rocket but was forced to scrub the launch after a local Karen called the cops, reporting that people were outside doing things and she did not like it.

The real story: If ever there were a good time to leave Earth…

SpaceX did have a scrubbed launch but then launched for real later in the week. Its module successfully docked with the ISS. 

Story 3 

Trump, Pelosi Face Off In Intense Game Of Bible Jeopardy 

Topic of the Week

Critical Race Theory in the church / racial divides in church culture

There have been some strange reactions in the Evangelical world to this whole situation. 

• Some funny/interesting reactions from inside and outside the church: 

  • Matt Walsh posted a video of white people kneeling to black people: https://twitter.com/mattwalshblog/status/1267507181689192448?

  • Dean of Union Seminary: “What has alienated America from its very soul, thereby virtually normalizing violence against Black lives? Answer: whiteness itself.”  (slink and soundbyte)

  • NBA Announcer fired for tweeting “All lives matter” (slink) 

  • CRU (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ) is holding segregated prayer meetings  (slink) 

  • NBA reporter cheers on burning down of low income housing but then calls rioters "animals" when they come around his neighborhood.

  • There is a blueprint for racial reconciliation being adopted by many in the evangelical Christian world that seems to come from something called Critical Theory, or Critical Race Theory. So what is it?

  • Yearning for justice points us to objective reality in Jesus Christ

Hate Mail

A man is concerned our story on the Constitution dying from coronavirus may cause confusion.

Paid-subscriber portion

Mailbag!

Kyle and Ethan answer some fair criticism about The Babylon Bee's coverage of Joe Biden.

Story 1

Oh No! The Scientist Gavin Newsom Has Been Listening To Is Actually A Bunch Of Raccoons Stuffed In A Lab Coat

Summary: Gavin Newsom has been listening to scientists throughout the pandemic, but it turns out the main scientist he was listening to is actually a bunch of raccoons in a lab coat. Sad!

• Are we not listening to SCIENCE! Anymore now that there are progressive crowds out and about?

Story 2

Archaeologists Unearth Galilean Coffee Shop Where Jesus Held Small Group

Summary: Archaeologists have found one of the coolest Bible landmarks: the coffee shop in Galilee where Jesus and His disciples would hold their weekly small groups.

• How would Jesus’s small group have been?

• Small groups: yay or nay? What’s wrong with a good old-fashioned Bible study? Where’s the coolest place for a small group to hang out?

• Small group horror stories

• Subscribers, send us small group stories!

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Kyle and Ethan talk to pro-life activist Lila Rose from Live Action about opposition to her organization, politicians gaslighting, and fostering a culture of life. Watch Kyle and Ethan get owned by facts and logic and be told their jokes are bad.

You can listen to Lila Rose on her new podcast: The Lila Rose Show! 

The Lila Rose Show explores questions about relationships, work, health, identity, purpose, and faith, with political and cultural commentary.

Also follow Live Action on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube.

Topics Discussed

• Lila has a new podcast to promote

• How did Live Action get started

• Taking on Anti-Abortion “Lies”

• Parenting challenges like when one child makes themself vomit all over the kitchen from scarfing down hot chocolate packets while you are attempting to have the smaller toddler have their nap time.

• Pranking Planned Parenthood

• Deciding on what is the funniest dog

• When they lit up WTC One Pink to celebrate the new abortion bill in New York state that allows late third trimester abortions

• Politicians gaslighting about how sacred life is despite their policies

• Kyle and Ethan get jabbed at for their Protestantism in the subscriber portion when they ask Lila The Ten Questions.

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like how we now have an awesome worship song generator on the website now. Subscribers sent us their unsolicited recordings and they were so good we had to share. Kyle and Ethan bring in a guitar and try their hand at randomly generated worship songs. Also, Biden can now decide people's race and gender, Florida violates the laws of SCIENCE by not killing more of their citizens, and social media is cracking down on misleading avatars.

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to listen to Kyle and Ethan go to the mailbag and answer some great questions from you, the subscribers.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Show Outline

Introduction

There's been an issue with the subscriber length podcast on downloader apps. If you are having trouble getting the full episode try deleting the URL and re-adding it.

Frank Fleming has a new book Superego: Fathom. Buy it!

Kyle reached the end of YouTube and Ethan got locked in a park.

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes American Gospel: Christ Alone which is a sobering, layman’s-level look at the prosperity gospel and how it has spread through the American church and beyond. Now available on Netflix.

Ethan likes Parry Gripp if you want your small kids to get good songs stuck in your head instead of bad songs.

This News Is Weird

Woman refuses to go on family walks after they invent disgusting 'poop tag' game

•  There is nothing more humiliating than carrying warm dog poop around

Boy, 9, cries after mum surprises him with first McDonald's since lockdown 

‘Hitler’s Alligator’ Dies In Moscow Zoo At The Age Of 84

Boy, 6, Cracks Open Robbery Case By Reeling In Sunken Safe From Lake

Robot dog herds sheep in New Zealand

• We finally get robots and this is what we do with them? Who wanted to replace dogs?

Kitten with two faces born in Oregon barn

• A dog’s dream or nightmare?

Grizzly bear with white fur caught on camera in Canada 

• It’s called a polar bear duh

Stories of the Week

Story 1

Biden: 'If You Don't Let Me Sniff Your Hair, You Ain't A Woman'

Summary: In a recent interview with a female reporter, Joe Biden suddenly lashed out, shouting, “Listen, if you don’t let me sniff your hair, you ain’t a woman!”

The real story: Speaking to Charlamagne tha God last Friday, Joe Biden said, “If you have a problem figuring out whether you’re for me or Trump, then you ain’t black.”

Biden is not alone among our political class in making wacky statements. 

Also mentioned: Ancestry.com Revokes Genealogies Of African Americans Who Don't Support Biden

Also also mentioned: To Save Time, The Babylon Bee Will Now Just Republish Everything Biden Says Verbatim

Story 2

Florida Ruled To Be In Violation Of Science For Not Having More People Die

Summary: Science says Florida should have seen skyrocketing deaths from COVID-19, but instead Florida has not seen anywhere near the number of problems faced by states like New York and New Jersey. Because of this a judge has ruled the state to be in violation of Science.

The real story: Governor Ron DeSantis was getting slammed in the media for a cautious, “lax” approach to the crisis, with people predicting a huge number of deaths in Florida. This disaster never happened. DeSantis focused his approach on the most vulnerable, like nursing homes, while other states like New York locked the elderly in with COVID-19 patients and restricted low-risk populations severely. People criticized him for opening beaches saying doom was sure to follow a few weeks later -- but this did not happen.

Florida: 2,200 deaths / 21,000,000 people

New York: 23,000 deaths / 19,500,000 people

• How does Andrew Cuomo do such a bad job managing this thing and get away with it while Florida gets slammed while doing a great job?

• The politicization of this virus is unfortunate. It doesn’t feel like other national crises we’ve faced where we all band together against the big, bad threat -- it feels like we’re hoping our political foes lose big time no matter the cost in human lives.

Story 3

Facebook To Begin Fact-Checking Misleading Avatars

Summary: Facebook announced today the social network will now be displaying a fact-check notice atop avatars that are an inaccurate portrayal of the user.

The real story: Facebook recently launched customizable avatars similar to Bitmojis and Apple’s Memojis. They tend to look nothing like the people creating them, whether intentionally or not.

• Ethan is offended that they do not have truly obese options

• The avatars are very trans-friendly in that you can mix male/female body types, whatever you want.

• Kyle feels his avatar is fairly accurate though they didn’t have his misaligned tooth or his quarantine neck beard.

• What’s the deal with avatars anyway? I guess it’s fun to see what you’d look like as some kind of generic mass-produced cartoon.

Topic of the Week

The Babylon Bee unveiled a new feature: the Worship Song Generator. A few of you actually recorded your songs!

• Kyle and Ethan generate songs on the spot!

• Fan submissions:

  • “Ten Bazillion Reasons To Sing” by Jaycie and Charis Chambers

  • “Insane, Scandalous, Reckless, Unstoppable” by Lacey and Raina Cornelsen

  • “Thundering Heaven Deluge” by Jeremiah Webster

  • “Eternal Body Ember” by Kevin Grant and Daniel Flores

• What lyrics were pitched by the writers but didn't make it in?

Hate Mail

It is short and sweet this week, but we don't think these people used their real names.

Paid-subscriber portion

Mailbag: We pull back the curtain on what it’s like getting pseudo-famous on the internet in response to a question from Bee fan Calvin Haynes.

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to apologist Dr. Frank Turek. Dr. Turek is an author, public speaker and radio host. He is the author of two books (Correct, Not Politically Correct and Stealing from God) and co-author of two more with Norman Geisler (I Don't Have Enough Faith to Be an Atheist and Legislating Morality).He hosts a call-in talk show called CrossExamined on American Family Radio. His television show, I Don't Have Enough Faith to be an Atheist, airs on the NRB Network. Kyle and Ethan talk to Turek about bad atheist arguments, evidences for Christianity, and Ethan sings a special song inspired by the CrossExamined website logo.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• Is Turek of any relation to Turok the dinosaur hunter?
• Ethan asks Frank if he wants to hear a song he wrote for him. It gets intense.
• Bad atheist arguments
• Who would win in a fight?
• If God is good and all-powerful, how could he allow the Star Wars Prequels to exist?
• Are murder hornets ontologically bad?
• What the evidences for the New Testament?

Subscriber Portion

Kyle and Ethan ask Frank Turek questions submitted by our subscribers and then give him The Ten Questions

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like teenage expert Greta Thunberg teaching everything now, Elon Musk being the real-life Tony Stark, and Biden hiring a translator to render his speech into plain English. Ravi Zacharias went on to glory so our topic of the week is recalling Ravi's impact as an apologist and ambassador of the Gospel. This episode gets emotional.

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to listen to Kyle and Ethan continue their tribute to Ravi and talk about civility, humility, and forgiveness.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Show Outline

Introduction 

Ethan helps out a family. You can help out too at https://www.ethannicolle.com/post/helping-a-struggling-family

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes Seinfeld 23 Hours To Kill and Ethan likes Kerry Callen’s Super Antics and Halo & Sprocket

This News Is Weird

Alleged thieves wore watermelons over heads at grocery store

'Virtual Pub Quiz' sets Guinness record for YouTube streaming

French serial-killer 'expert' admits he made up his experience — even the murder of his nonexistent wife

Pentagon officially releases UFO videos

Massive asteroid flying past Earth next week looks like it's wearing a face mask

Stories of the Week

Story 1 

MasterClass Replaces All Instructors With Greta Thunberg

• CNN added Greta to their panel of COVID-19 experts

• Check out the new ad from MasterClass!

Story 2 

California Police Attempt To Arrest Elon Musk's Holographic Decoy As Real Musk Escapes On Rocket To Mars

• Musk threatened he was leaving CA to another state

• Musk threatened they were reopening their factory and to come and arrest him if they county insisted on trying to keep them closed

• CA or the county of Merced backed off

• Tweeted “Take the red pill”/but red rose is democratic socialism

• Elon Musk speaks in parables and riddles, like Jesus

Story 3

Biden Campaign Hires Interpreter To Translate His Speeches Into English

• Biden’s interpreter reached out and provided a handy key to help us understand Biden’s unique and endearing speech patterns. Here are a few of the examples that should help you next time you see a Biden speech.

Topic of the Week

Kyle and Ethan recall great teaching moments from Ravi Zacharias. 

Clips referenced:

Meaninglessness  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03qR8b4P8Uk

Islam/forgiveness: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmRCsXRassg&feature=youtu.be

Testimony: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yO8HWH7aq-s

Civility: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MYQhFB_f4I

Humility: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f78Nr4P5KaE

Short tribute: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UP5NybBs0Ak

Another short tribute: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSy4YtExaJg&t

Meaninglessness is self-defeating: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4i68mc1lMkc

Subjective moral reasoning: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0218GkAGbnU

Hate Mail

Going to video means we are beginning to get comments on our appearances and some conspiracy theories about Kyle.

Paid-subscriber portion

Ravi Zacharias still teaches Kyle and Ethan about forgiveness, subjective moral reasoning, humility, and civility.

To watch or listen to the full length podcast, become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to professor Tim Milosch about China and international politics. Tim Milosch is an adjunct professor of communication studies, teaching world politics at Biola University, and is currently pursuing a doctoral degree in political science studies at Claremont Graduate University. Did the virus start from someone eating some bad bat soup? Is the Great Wall really that great?  Are the Chinese a bunch of filthy commies? Who is General Tso? Find out by watching this new episode!

You can hear more from Tim on his podcast Tim Talks Politics.

Topics Discussed

• Which jokes are not racist?
• Who is General Tso?
• The origins of the coronavirus
• Who are the Chinese Communist Party?
• China’s handling of its neighbors in the South Sea and refusal to recognize independence for Taiwan or Hong Kong
• China making fake islands
• Chinese propaganda
• China cracking down on churches, demolishing buildings, arresting Christians

Subscriber Portion

Kyle and Ethan subject Tim Milosch to the ten questions and we find out if there is a Roman Catholic Carman!

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Lyn Ulbricht, the mother of Ross Ulbricht who is currently serving two life sentences without the possibility of parole for creating Silk Road, which was essentially the libertarian Craigslist. Lyn Ulbricht heads up Free Ross, which is an organization that seeks criminal justice reform as well as Ross's freedom. They talk about Ross's case, excessive sentencing practices, and how Ross and Lyn have reconnected with Jesus during this whole series of events.

Topics Discussed

• Who is Ross? What was he like before all this happened?

• Silk Road

• Ross's prosecution and sentencing

• Ross's testimony about Christ giving hope in the midst of hard circumstances

Subscriber Portion

Kyle and Ethan try to break Lyn's brain with the ten questions.

Become a subscriber at babylonbee.com/plans

This episode is brought to you by Faithful Counseling. Click that link and get 10% off!

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like the invasion of murder hornets, how a 30 second clip is dividing people, and the “if-it-just-saves-one-life” crowd supporting perpetual lockdown. Kira Davis, editor-at-large of RedState joins Kyle and Ethan for a bit and then Dr. Robert P. Murphy arrives to explain what in the world is going on with the economy under lockdown and how Christians should think more like an economist.  

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to listen to Kyle and Ethan wax poetic on all the wonders of cheese with a G.K. Chesterton reading!

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction 

Kyle’s vacation out of California rapidly descends into chaos as his car explodes and Ethan tries to one-up Kyle’s story.  

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes the In-N-Out Animal Style Fries & secret menu and Ethan likes The Steeldrivers (Chris Stapleton years).

This News Is Weird

Florida lizard breaks world poop record, dies constipated

Man walks into Dunkin Donuts with no mask — or pants

'Darth Vader' enforces lockdown in Philippine village

World’s biggest 5G tower installed on Mount Everest using yaks to lug ‘controversial’ equipment up tracks

French encouraged to eat more cheese as act of patriotism

Stories of the Week

Story 1 

Trump Retaliates Against Asian Murder Hornets With American Kamikaze Bears

• Washington state is noticing a worrying new invasive species of Asian Giant Hornets called “Murder Hornets”

• Are bears the deterrent we need to stop this unchecked aggression from the Far East lately?
• What other options did Trump consider?

Story 2 

Asking For Context Of Thirty Second Video Revealed To Be Racist Dog Whistle

• Ahmaud Aubrey was followed in a truck in an alleged citizen’s arrest by two whites, a father and son.

• When one of the men tried to use a shotgun to force the man to comply, an altercation occurred, in which Ahmaud was killed.

• Everyone is forming an opinion based on 30 seconds of footage- which looks really bad- but does it provide all the relevant data we need to decide guilt? Is it okay to ask questions?

• The struggle of even talking about this civilly and the frustration felt by all people

Story 3

 'It's Worth It If It Saves Just One Life,' Says Woman Who Supports Abortion On Demand

• Hypocrisy of the left on saving lives… trying to keep abortion clinics open and shutting everything else down

• Obviously would have to shut down cities, get rid of cars, planes, subways… 

• As if a permanent lockdown on the economy won’t cost lives in the long run.  Even now the UN is warning about 260 million marching to starvation worldwide as a result of the economy being shut down. What about those lives?

• If we don’t get back to work and produce things, pretty soon we won’t be just watching netflix and ordering in pizza every night. Things will get bad for everyone.

• Planned Parenthood’s bizarre tweet on Mother’s Day

Interview of the Week

Dr. Robert P Murphy joins Kyle and Ethan to help explain what in the world is going on with the economy. He breaks things down like Ethan is five and uses numerous lemonade stand analogies.  We had some issues on the skype video quality.

Love Mail/Hate Mail

We talk about how we are a racist trash fire.

Paid-subscriber portion 

Looking at Chesterton’s essay on cheese. Poets need to write more about cheese.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle go on a roller coaster ride of an interview with outspoken Christian and duck hunter Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty fame. He was quarantining before it was cool and he gives life lessons and gospel witness in this whirlwind episode.  They discuss free toilet paper you find in the woods, what the apostle Paul says about killing millions of ducks, and how sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll don't satisfy. 

You can watch Phil's new show In The Woods With Phil on Blaze TV.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• Having a camera crew living with your family

• Being explicitly Christian in a public sphere

• Living off in the woods all by yourself- quarantining before it was cool

• Free toilet paper in the woods

• Coming to Jesus and living by the good book

• Phil's mouth is Noah's ark filled with two of every animal

• Why we kill ducks and not geese

• Putting down the pudding and picking up popcorn

This episode is available to watch in full for everyone as a celebration of the launch of our video podcasts.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this special mother's day episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by their moms, Diane and Diane, to talk about the biggest stories of the week like celebrities being just like you, believe-all-women hypocrisy, and how expert predictions always go well.  Then, the biggest topic of the week, your mom.  We find out about what it was like having to raise Kyle and Ethan and whether or not it was worth it.

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to keep listening to the two Dianes spill on all the really embarassing stories that they have on Kyle and Ethan. Kyle's mom brings in a treasure trove of old stuff Kyle made.

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction -  Kyle and Ethan are joined by Kyle's mom Diane and introduce viewers to the new videocast.

Stuff That’s Good - 

Kyle - Disc golf

Ethan - Crooked Still

Weird news- 

Police in India reveal device to detain coronavirus lockdown violators without contact

Kentucky governor apologizes to Tupac Shakur for unemployment mix-up

Sign warns 'mystery human poo-er' to stop defecating on garage

Man takes 43 wet sponge hits to the face for Guinness record

Stories of the Week

Story 1 - Inspiring: Celebrities Spell Out 'We're All In This Together' With Their Yachts

With Americans feeling the financial pressure of millions of jobs lost, Celebrities joined together to bring hope to the nation by spelling “We’re all in this together” with their yachts

• Patton Tweet

• People who thought it was real

• Hope police cars - PROPHECY REPORT cops got together to spell out HOPE with their cars and they really did that

Story 2 - Judge Dismisses Sexual Assault Allegations Against Biden On Grounds That He Is Not A Republican

At a prelimary hearing to establish evidence in the sexual assault allegations against Joe Biden, a federal judge dismissed all charges after the revelation that he was not a Republican.

• This is the new normal since Kavanaugh

• Get screenshots of tweets from Kavanaugh era

• Adam Ford updated old Pelosi tweets: https://disrn.com/news/opinion-updated-some-of-pelosis-tweets-in-light-of-accusations-against-biden

• Feminist attorney Lisa Bloom said she believes Tara Reade was assaulted by Biden but still supports him: I believe you, Tara Reade.

Story 3 - Scientists Who Didn't Predict A Single Thing Accurately For Last Two Months Confident They Know What The Weather Is Going To Be Like In 100 Years

Authorities in the scientific community who touted faulty COVID-19 models confirmed today that they are "pretty confident" they know what the weather is going to be like in 100 years.

Kyle and Ethan play Name That Failed Prophecy!

Topic of the Week - Your Mom

• Was it worth it? 

• Weird/embarrassing stories from the kids’ youth (subscriber?)

• What’s your favorite yo momma joke?

• Parenting advice: you’re obviously great parents since you raised the minds behind The Babylon Bee. What is some advice you have for all the young mothers out there?

• What was the worst part about raising (Ethan/Kyle)

• What hopes and dreams were crushed the moment you became a parent

• What do you do with all your free time now 

• Kyle talks about his Christian upbringing. You didn’t let him watch movies like The Terminator or Friday the 13th, scarring him for life. What do you have to say for yourself?

• Are there any interesting home remedies you found as a mother?

• Tips for moms -- agree or disagree

Love Mail/Hate Mail-   We got some hate regarding this gem.

Paid-subscriber portion

Exclusive moms stuff

Subscribers, please send you emails to our mailbag at podcast@babylonbee.com so Kyle and Ethan can answer your questions or talk about the things you want to hear about.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is The Babylon Bee Interview Show.

Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Larry the Cucumber voice and VeggieTales co-creator and Mike Nawrocki! Mike is a director, producer, writer, voice actor, animator, musician, puppeteer, and assistant professor of Film and Animation at Lipscomb University in Nashville, TN. Kyle, Ethan, and Mike give you the Babylon Bee exclusive behind-the-scenes look into the world of VeggieTales!

Mike is also the author of a series of children’s books called The Dead Sea Squirrels—out now!

You can find more from Mike Nawrocki at Facebook and Instagram.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

If you are hurting financially right now, check out our $100,000 COVID relief fund set up by Seth Dillon which you can find out more about by contacting us at our website. If you need financial help contact us! Also donate if you are able to chip in to help!

Topics Discussed

• How the original VeggieTales became a huge sensation

• How Ethan ruined VeggieTales with In The House

• Kyle and Ethan give Mike free creative advise and character ideas

• Mike's new books The Dead Sea Squirrels

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:42:37)

• Does he have any thoughts on Phil Vischer’s comments where he regrets aspects of VeggieTales?

• Bacon Bill and MeatyTales

• We get Larry the Cucumber to read some Bible verses you've never heard him read before!

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 4/29/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like Kim Jong Un being Un-dead, doctor Trump talking about disinfectant being used to clean the body, and the oppression of the American people under this lockdown being so bad that Trump has to tell the governors to “let my people go!” This episode is a must listen for the ‘Go Down Donald’ music track alone which we spent way too much time on. They also talk about why staring at a TV isn’t church.

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to listen to Kyle and Ethan dig into the mail bag where they find an audio file sent to us by a subscriber! They talk about worship songs or worship leader habits that really bug them and answer other deep questions from subscribers. 

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

If you are hurting financially right now, check out our $100,000 COVID relief fund set up by Seth Dillon which you can find out more about by contacting us at our website. If you need financial help contact us! Also donate if you are able to chip in to help!

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about waterslides and hotdogs and shampoo.

Stuff That’s Good - 

Kyle: H.P. Lovecraft - At the Mountains of Madness, The Festival, Rats in the Walls, The Hound

Ethan:  Like Trees Walking Podcast

These Things Are Weird - 

Ontario woman’s life saved by breast implant that deflected bullet

Dirt bikers make use of sand-covered skate park in California

Oregon man drove to 11 different Wendy's restaurants twice in 1 day to stock up on free nuggets, report says

Woman ‘wakes up in a body bag after mistakenly being declared dead’

Stories of the Week

Story 1 - North Korea Reports Kim Jong Un Is 'Most Alive Person In Universe'

• NBC’s Katy Tur tweeted then quickly deleted a tweet saying he was brain dead

• Conflicting rumors were circulating that the North Korean dictator had to have heart surgery to put a stent put in and that he was either dead or in a vegitative state

•  Liberals started thirsting for a woman dictator in his sister Kim Yo Jong

• North Korea is going to get a woman leader before the US? LET THAT SINK IN PEOPLE

•  Other countries that beat the US to a woman leader

• Kyle reads a very real and not fake at all statement from the People's Republic Of North Korea

Story 2 - Trump Threatens More Plagues Unless State Governors Let His People Go

• Trump wants to start recommending phases of opening up the economy. But California, Oregon & Washington Announce Western States Pact in which they will only open up their states when SCIENCE says to.

Kyle and Ethan hit the guitar and banjo for a new version of an old classic, Let My People Go. 

(Begins at 00:29:11)

Go down Donald, way down in Michigan

Tell old Whitmer to let my people go

When buyin’ guns and seeds was banned

(Let my people go)

Oppressed so hard they could not stand

(Let My people go)

“Go down ,  Donald  

way down in Cali Land

Tell old Gavin to let the skaters go” (LET THE SKATERS GO)

So Trump spoke to the press and there decreed

(Let My people go)

But CNN -wouldn’t air the feed

(Let My people go)

Yes the protesters said, “come down (COME DOWN), Donald, (DONALD) 

way (WAY)  down (DOWN) at the Bass Pro” BASS PRO

Tell those governors to let them buy ammo (LET THEM BUY AMMO)

Trump said, “If you want to end the quarantine,

(Why not give bleach a go?)

Hit em with hydroxychloroquine

(Let the Clorox flow!”)

God, The Lord said, “Go down, (GO DOWN)  Donald,(DONALD) way (WAY) down (DOWN) to America”

Tell Dem TELL DEM governors GOVERNORS  to let My people go

Tell Dem TELL DEM governors GOVERNORS let My people go 

Story 3 - Trump Says To Drink Lots Of Water, Media Reports He Told Everyone To Drown Themselves

• Trump seemed to be pontificating before the press about things he was discussing with his experts about in coming up with possible treatments to defeat coronavirus.

• The corporate press immediately reported that Trump was advising the public to drink bleach and disinfectants and blue checks and Democrats jumped over it.

Topic of the Week - Why go to church?

• With most people streaming church services, is there a reason to go back? Why should Christians have fellowship in person?

• Broader cultural effects of religion and church attendance

• Hebrews 10:25 - And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

• “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer” (Acts 2:42) - Most of these things are not very zoom-friendly

• Church as performance versus church as participation in the body

  • If you’re just there to see a cool concert and speech, then really there is no difference between attending and streaming.

  • The consumerism mindset, church as a product

  • Communion, baptism, church discipline

• Also need to consider that you go to church to serve others not just to receive a message or receive service yourself

• Plus, pastors who preach on a live stream are really flat and two-dimensional. They aren’t very responsive. It’s like talking to a wall.

Hate Mail- Get rid of that Mullet guy!!

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:08:22)

Mailbag! - We get a audio clip from a fan and an email.

Subscribers, please send you emails and short audio files to our mailbag at podcast@babylonbee.com so Kyle and Ethan can answer your questions or talk about the things you want to hear about.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is the Babylon Bee Interview Show.

Kyle and Ethan talk to pastor Michael G. Brown, a reformed church planting missionary currently serving in an area hard hit by the virus: Milan, Italy. He is a co-author of the book Sacred Bond: Covenant Theology Explored. They talk about what it’s like being a missionary in a part of the world that got slammed hard by the pandemic and how the Gospel meets the greatest need of everyone living through these times. You can find out more about the mission efforts in Milan at ReformationItaly.org

Topics Discussed

• Serving in an area that was hit very hard by coronavirus

• Planting a reformed church in Italy and the history of the Reformation there 

• Moralistic therapeutic deism and post-modernism

• The Reformed Gospel and the Council of Trent

• The pros and cons of nationalized healthcare

• Metal music

• Pizza, Mario Brothers, and Papist Ninjas

• The Ten Questions

The full interview is for Babylon Bee subscribers, so...

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the biggest stories of the week like New York City Mayor de Blasio calling on everyone to be a KAREN, a woman is wanting everyone to affirm her relationship with a chandelier, and the certain future of chain-smoking monkeys taking over the world. Kyle and Ethan then get Hans Fiene of Lutheran Satire wound up about various things in Christian culture.

In the subscriber portion, subscribers get to hear the rest of the Hans Fiene interview and Kyle and Ethan go to the mailbag.

Send your emails to podcast@babylonbee.com and maybe we will answer you in our next Mailbag segment!

If you are hurting financially right now, check out our $100,000 COVID relief fund set up by Seth Dillon which you can find out more about by contacting us at our website. If you need financial help contact us! Also donate if you are able to chip in to help!

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about the latest Babylon Bee podcast which happened to have been the latest Audio Mullet episode.

Stuff That’s Good - 

Kyle: W.A Criswell’s sermon Whether We Live Or Die

Ethan: Garlic Reaper Hot Sauce

Weird news

California woman dreamed about eating engagement ring — woke up to find she really did 

Rusty knife embedded in man’s head for 26 years after being mugged

Woman dating a chandelier has discrimination case thrown out

According to DISRN: A British woman who claims to be in a long-term relationship with a 92-year-old chandelier was told that her attraction to the light fixture is not a protected sexual orientation.

Novelty toilet roll cakes keep Finnish baker in business

Man opens up corroded can of Spider-Man pasta from 1995 after getting 1995 retweets.

Monkeys and Apes chain smoking cigaretts as coronavirus panic grips planet

Monkey caught on camera flying kite on rooftop

Woman dating a chandelier has discrimination case thrown out

Pensioner thrown from fighter jet after accidentally pulling ejector lever mid-flight

Missouri Sues Televangelist Jim Bakker For Selling Fake Coronavirus Cure

Coronavirus: Police raid closed Liverpool comedy club after live-stream mix-up

Stories of the Week

Story 1 - De Blasio Announces System For Reporting Social Distancing Violations: Knowledgeable Actors Reporting Edict Noncompliance (KAREN)

At a press conference this morning, New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio unveiled a new way that individual citizens can help enforce social distancing: a.new enforcement program called the Knowledgeable Actors Reporting Edict Noncompliance, or KAREN for short.”

• According to DISRN: De Blasio encourages New Yorkers to snap photos of people not social distancing and text to authorities: "Enforcement will come right away"

Story 2 - Trump Announces America's Grand Reopening Sale

President Trump has announced that America will be reopening soon, and the occasion will be celebrated with an "insane" "once-in-a-lifetime" Grand Reopening Sale.

The grand reopening extravaganza will include 50% off all landmarks and monuments, in a bid to make back some of the trillions lost during the recession. 

Story 3 - Dems Rush To Defend Kavanaugh After He Puts On Joe Biden Mask

Democrats are scrambling to defend Brett Kavanaugh against his accusers after he put on a Joe Biden mask. 

• According to DISRN: Just last Thursday we pointed out that more than three weeks after Reade's serious public accusation, CNN still had ZERO articles on their website mentioning her name. Not one. Despite 700 articles mentioning Brett Kavanaugh's debunked accuser, Christine Blasey Ford.

• CNN finally ran this headline: Democrats grapple with questions about Tara Reade's sexual assault allegation against Joe Biden

Interview of the Week - Hans Fiene of Lutheran Satire.

Love Mail/Hate Mail-  We get two this week.  Rich hates the character limit on our contact form. He had so much more to say about us and our $100,000 COVID relief fund set up by Seth Dillon which you can find out more about by contacting us at our website. If you need financial help contact us! Also donate if you are able to chip in to help! We aren’t sure what we did to anger the second person.

Paid-subscriber portion 

The rest of the Hans Fiene interview!

Mailbag!

Subscribers, please send you emails to our mailbag at podcast@babylonbee.com so Kyle and Ethan can answer your questions or talk about the things you want to hear about.

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After some Skype trouble and a rant about the ongoing lockdown, what Doug wants to do to Gavin Newsom, and civil disobedience, Doug and Ethan talk about Christian music, worship, and bands they like. 

Kyle and Ethan talk to former congressman Dr. Ron Paul. Dr. Paul advocated for non-interventionism, sound money, and individual liberty throughout his career and became the figurehead of a libertarian movement through his presidential campaigns. He is the author of several books including End The Fed and Swords Into Plowshares.  Kyle and Ethan ask Dr. Paul about his faith, attempt to get libertarian answers on various modern problems, and try to get him to spill on how much gold he has under his mattress. We find out if Ethan accepts Ron Paul into his heart to become a full-blown libertarian in the subscriber portion. 

You can see more Ron Paul on his Liberty Report.

Topics Discussed

• How Ron’s faith and politics intersect and on setting an example

• Non-interventionism; blaming America, blowback, & war

• Ron Paul’s foundations for his pro-life views

• On refusing to endorse McCain or Romney

• What is sound money and what is wrong with the dollar? The gold standard

• The Boom-Bust cycle. Ron Paul thinks the virus is being blamed instead of where the real problem lies at the Federal Reserve

Subscriber Portion (Begins At 00:43:45)

• Coronavirus- is the government cure worse than the disease? Is it a HOAX? 

• Is there hope for the future?

• Dan tries to explain inflation

• Kyle and Ethan discuss non-interventionism

• Does Ethan accept Ron Paul into his heart?

The full interview is for Babylon Bee subscribers, so...

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 This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 4/15/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the great void in humor we sense as Bernie drops out of the race, how Biden is making the face mask regulations work for him when he wants to smell everyone, and how Trump finally solved his press briefing woes. Kyle and Ethan also talk about weird news like screaming goats taking over a Welsh town and also chat with comedian boomer Jeff Allen.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan talk about the latest open thread premium post about Good Friday for Babylon Bee subscribers, circumcision, Mediterranean food. and some unused headlines.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about milk production, goose racism, and word associations. Ethan also gives combat tips against geese. Kyle and Ethan talk about their Easter celebrations in quarantine.

Stuff That’s Good - 

Kyle: 90s CCM Albums

Ethan: Best Worst Movie

Weird news-  Ethan inspires a soundbyte and a new segment.

Coronavirus lockdown spurs police in England to dye 'Blue Lagoon' black to deter Instagrammers

Mountain goats use coronavirus lockdown to take over Welsh town, video shows

Mum who gave birth during coronavirus lockdown calls child 'Covid Bryant'

Story 1 - Bernie Tests Negative For President : Presidential Hopeful and Socialist Bernie Sanders had his entire campaign derailed after getting back the results from a routine medical exam. Overall he had a clean bill of health but he did test negative for President.

• Bernie Sanders dropped out finally and endorsed Joe Biden!

• Since we may not see Bernie again, here are some Bernie Sanders greatest hits…

  • Bernie Sanders Drops Out Of Race To Spend More Time With His Many, Many Houses

  • Bernie Sanders Drops Out As Campaign Goals Of Locking Everyone Up, Destroying Economy Already Achieved

  • Bernie Vows To Rebuild Berlin Wall

  • '80s Movie Night Gets Awkward As Bernie Sanders Keeps Rooting For All The Villains 

  • Bernie Sanders Hastily Adds Right To An Abortion At Any Time To Copy Of The Constitution

  • Bernie Sanders Unveils New Plan To Levy Special Tax On Anyone Who Makes More Money Than Bernie Sanders

  • Nike Releases Bernie Sanders Signature Shoe That Helps You Survive Under Socialism

  • Bernie Sanders Arrives In Hong Kong To Lecture Protesters On How Good They Have It Under Communism

  • Bernie Sanders Praises China For Eradicating Poverty By Killing All The Poor People

  • Bernie Sanders Leaps Into Wood Chipper To Reduce Carbon Footprint

  • Bernie Sanders's Acme Rocket Explodes In His Face In Yet Another Failed Attempt To Catch A Billionaire

  • Sanders Clarifies His Gulags Will Be Democratic Gulags

  • Bernie Sanders Supporters Defend How He Always Wears A Top Hat And Monocle And Carries Around Bags With Dollar Signs On Them

  • Bernie Sanders Praises Slave Owners For Free Housing Program

  • Disheveled And Covered In $100 Bills, Bernie Sanders Claims He Was Attacked By A Group Of Billionaires

  • Dems Combine Into Giant Mech To Annihilate Bernie Sanders

  • Bernie Sanders Yelling At Kids To Get Off His Many, Many Lawns

  • Bernie Sanders Banned From Fortnite For Throwing All The Other Players Into Gulags

  • Bernie Sanders Takes Quiet Moment To Seek Advice From Portraits Of His Favorite Dictators

Story 2 - Biden Cuts Hole In Mask So He Can Still Sniff People's Hair : Democratic presidential front-runner Joe Biden has agreed to wear a CDC-approved N95 ventilator mask. However his staff was troubled when he cut a nose-shaped hole out of his mask so that he could still sniff people’s hair.

• This one went nuts.  Burned Bernie Bros have been taking to social media to complain about Joe Biden too.

• We need to make a mask that looks like you have a bat hanging out of your mouth

• Is everyone complying with wearing masks out in public?

• Jesus not obeying the shelter in place order

Story 3 - Trump Installs Ejection Seats Throughout Press Briefing Room : After several tumultuous press briefings with a combative media, President Donald Trump has sought to solve the ongoing conflict by reaching out a hand ... and pressing a red button on his podium that ejects journalists into space on rocket-powered chairs. 

• Usual characters trade jabs with president at his press briefings with coronavirus task force. 

• Yamiche from PBS has been sparring with him about ventilators.

• Mike Lindell the MyPillow guy retooled his 75% of his factory to make masks and gave some off the cuff remarks about reading the Bible and looking to God during this time, the media went apoplectic.

• CNN’s Jim Acosta, another usual character, accused Trump of engaging in “happy talk” and painting a rosy picture despite personal protective equipment shortages. Trump slammed him.

Interview of the Week - Millennial Kyle and Gen X Ethan talk to boomer and comedian Jeff Allen about life in America changing, Jesus saving Jeff out of alcoholism, and keeping comedy clean.

Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback -  We get a neutral mail teasing us with knowledge of Carman.

People! If you have stories about Carman, send a short audio file or email to podcast@babylonbee.com !!!

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:24:54)

Open Discussion Thread; Good Friday

Some Unused Headlines and sneak peak at upcoming headlines in our drafts

Mediterranean food and circumcision

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This is the Babylon Bee Interview Show.

Kyle and Ethan talk to Kristen Day, the Executive Director of Democrats For Life of America. She caught the Bee’s eye after putting Pete Buttigieg on the spot about whether or not there is a place in the Democratic Party for pro-life voters. Kyle and Ethan chat with her about abortion, pro-life activism, and partisan divides. 

Topics Discussed

• There are 21 million pro-life democrats that aren’t being served by their party

• Kristen’s pro-life convictions based on religious worldview and science

• Having an opinion on abortion without a uterus

• Safe, Legal, and Rare becoming Legal… ‘Shout Your Abortion’

• Confronting Pete Buttigieg on whether there is room in the party for pro-life Dems

• The goals and activism of Democrats For Life of America

• How the pro-abortion lobby took control of the party

• The Democrats For Life are not officially endorsing Joe Biden

• “Pro-life for the whole life”

• Political strategies and strange alliances

• Adoption and pregnancy centers

 This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 4/8/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about how unemployment has skyrocketed, Jeremy Camp has created a camp for all kids named Jeremy, and how Bill Gates’ cure for coronavirus was taken out by a Windows virus. Kyle and Ethan then discuss the wonder, the mystery,  and the historicity of the Resurrection and how that sets Christianity apart from every other worldview.  

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan see what you subscribers out there are reading in our new premium open discussion thread.

This podcast is brought to you by the Classic Learning Test (CLT Exam). Check out an alternative to the SAT and ACT at cltexam.com

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle tortures Ethan with Star Trek talk.  

Kyle- Codenames A Party Game

Ethan- That Story Show Podcast

Story 1 - Groundbreaking New Study Suggests Shutting Down Economy Could Contribute To Unemployment

• This gif tells the story of the weekly unemployment claims. Unemployment skyrocketed over 10 million unemployment claims in just two weeks. 

• Some are projecting 15% unemployment rate in a few weeks and many small businesses are threatened with permanent closures and bankruptcies

Story 2 -  Jeremy Camp Opens Camp For Underprivileged Kids Named Jeremy: 'Jeremy Camp'

Story 3 - Tragic: Bill Gates Had A Cure For Coronavirus But It Was Erased By A Windows Virus

• Gates had stepped down from Microsoft board recently to focus on humanitarian efforts.

• He says the deaths from coronavirus are a “nightmare scenario” but could be less that what is being predicted if we all stay home.

• He said back in 2015 that we should be concerned about disease and not war causing millions of deaths.

Topic of the Week - The historicity of Christianity in the life, death, and resurrection of Christ. The full humanity of Christ and how modern Christians tend to de-emphasize the resurrection of the body.

• Modern Christians have deemphasized the resurrection of the body.

• Kyle’s college story

• Purpose-driven life gospel presentation:

  • “Believe God loves you and made you for his purposes. Believe you’re not an accident. Believe you were made to last forever. Believe God has chosen you to have a relationship with Jesus, who died on the cross for you. Believe that no matter what you’ve done, God wants to forgive you. Second, receive. Receive his forgiveness for your sins. Receive his Spirit, who will give you the power to fulfill your life purpose. ... Wherever you are reading this, I invite you to bow your head and quietly whisper the prayer that will change your eternity. ‘Jesus, I believe in you and I receive you.’ Go ahead. If you sincerely meant that prayer, congratulations! Welcome to the family of God!”” 

• Lord I Lift Your Name on High

Bible’s emphasis on resurrection --

...If Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is in vain and your faith is in vain. 

“By vindicating Christ in His resurrection, the Father declared His acceptance of Jesus’ work on our behalf... Had Christ not been raised, we would have a mediator whose redeeming work in our behalf was not acceptable to God.” -- RC Sproul

“The cross and the empty tomb stand at the center of the Christian faith. Without these, there is no good news — no salvation.” -- Albert Mohler

Emptiness of “religion” and the alternatives

A.) Pop culture -- “he’s in a better place”

B.) Atheist eulogy: And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.

And you'll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they'll be comforted to know your energy's still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you're just less orderly. Amen. 

Proofs of the Resurrection

1. Empty tomb -- why didn’t his enemies just produce his body?

2. Eyewitnesses -- Christianity began spreading rapidly as the eyewitness accounts began to spread.

3. Disciples’ boldness -- Seeing a resurrected Christ turned Peter from being afraid of a little girl to proclaiming Christ crucified to thousands in the book of Acts (Bible’s honesty).

4. Martyrs -- at some point, you would have thought some of the disciples would have given up the game if it were all a hoax. But all of them except possibly John were slaughtered for their faith and clung to Christ’s resurrection as their power and hope.

5. Ultimately we believe because of the Word of God and because of our changed lives by the resurrection power of God.

 Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback -  We got love mail. We think. This is an emoji filled message so we will take it as a compliment.

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:10:51)

Open Discussion Thread: Whatchyall Readin' Lately?

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Dr. Jeff Myers, President of Summit Ministries, and author of the new book Unquestioned Answers. They discuss cheesy church sign and bumper sticker theology, canned Christian clichés, easy answers, and the need to think deeply about the reasons for why we believe what we believe. Kyle and Ethan own Jeff with the ironclad "rabbit poop" proof for atheism and talk about the need for a more thoughtful faith.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• What does Summit Ministries do

• To what extent Is it okay to have doubts and questions in Christianity

• Bumper sticker clichés in Christian culture

• Church signs are mostly ‘dad jokes’

• Unquestioned Answers

• “Simplicism” - the desire to reduce deep truths into sound bytes?

• Being in dialogue while not shutting down conversation

• The ironclad ‘rabbit poop’ argument for atheism previously mentioned on our Greg Koukl interview

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:43:45)

Songs mentioned on the podcast: 

Heritage Singers / "God Said It, I Believe It"

Bobby Bare / “Drop Kick Me Jesus”

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 4/1/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by the editor-in-chief of Ricochet, Jon Gabriel, as they discuss the week’s big stories like using worthless dollar bills as toilet paper, China being so awesome and great at everything, and the government accidentally banning itself when it bans all non-essential business. They also discuss reading really old books by dead guys to gain perspective during hard times.

You can hear more Jon Gabriel on his podcast: The Conservatarians.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle, Ethan, and Jon Gabriel talk about our awesome subscriber portion intros that you’re missing out on if you are not a subscriber, pacing while talking on phone calls, ten questions on life for Jon, and also analyzing some list of the top 100 20th century novels.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan welcome Jon Gabriel to the podcast. 

Stuff That’s Good - 

Ethan- Rise of Jordan Peterson documentary

Kyle- Tuttle Twins Books

Jon - A Confederacy of Dunces

Story 1 - Toilet Paper Crisis Solved As Government Prints Trillions Of Fresh, Soft Dollar Bills

• According to Thomas Massie this isn’t a $2.2 Trillion stimulus; it is a $6 trillion stimulus when you factor in all the unaccountable actions by the Federal Reserve and US Treasury

• The Federal Reserve lowered interest rates to 0% and set reserve requirements at banks to zero.

• When Americans get a $1200 check, but the bill is $2 trillion, each American’s tax burden to pay it off will be $13,333. 

• Inflation is the increase of the money supply, not the immediate increase in consumer prices. Effects won’t be felt immediately and equally dispersed throughout the economy’s industries.  Austrian economics teaches that this is how bubbles form in certain industries and systematic malinvestments of resources take place in the first place. The higher forms of production get bid up first, they have the first crack at the “free money”. They go crazy building factories and end products that there are no real savings to buy at the end of the road. Boom and then bust.

Story 2 - China: 'We've Completely Cured Coronavirus And Everything Is Fine Here And No One Is Allowed In To Check'

• Their numbers are pretty low. They told World Health Org coronavirus wasn’t spreading from person to person and the WHO tweeted that out January 14!

• Why does WHO defend China as in this CNBC article?

•  China stopped their lockdown protocols but then suddenly closed movie theaters again?

• Orders for urns much greater than reported deaths?

Story 3 - Government Accidentally Shuts Itself Down With Ban On Non-Essential Businesses

• I really miss Adam Ford.  Now it’s just the libertarian bee.

• How are we deciding what is essential or not

• Is it dangerous to cede the idea that church is “non-essential”

Topic of the Week - Talking to Jon Gabriel about reading old books to gain a sense of perspective.

Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback -  Ethan almost doxxes Joe “Flowerbed”

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:02:47)

• Ten questions for Jon Gabriel
• Time’s Top Novels

 Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Dana Loesch. She is a talk radio host, author, TV commentator, and longtime Second Amendment advocate. She has a new book Grace Canceled: How Outrage is Destroying Lives, Ending Debate, and Endangering Democracy. Kyle, Ethan, and Dana talk about milkshake ducks, corporate media reporting on cultural divides by taking sides, believing all women except conservative clumps of cells, and searching for Bigfoot. 

You can also follow Dana on Twitter.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• Kyle and Ethan shine a spotlight on all of her evil

• Dana talks about that CNN “Townhall” on Gun Violence

• The second amendment, gun control, and cultural issues

• Cancel culture and milkshake ducks

• Gun violence being the fault of the National Rifle Association

• The Second Amendment covers battle tanks and armored combat vehicles.

• The left attacking her/receiving death threats

• Society is addicted to outrage and cancelling people

• Searching for Bigfoot

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:42:44)

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 3/25/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss the week’s big stories like quiverfull families running afoul of social distancing rules, Dems and Republicans debating how much imaginary money to spend stimulating the economy, and Trump taking advantage of Disneyland being empty by going on every ride. Kyle and Ethan talk about stuff that’s good and inform the listeners how to chase your hat with a life lesson from GK Chesterton.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan discuss the news media being so biased that it makes normal people defend Trump who otherwise wouldn’t and how Tulsi Gabbard has been absorbed into the Borg collective and forced to support Joe Biden.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Ethan is the Samwise to Kyle’s Frodo, the government is chasing us to enforce social distancing, and Kyle got to go to a mountain cabin in a winter wonderland.

We now have a premium section on the website with exclusive articles and behind-the-scenes takes. One of this week’s articles got covered there. You can also preview the Babylon Bee big coffee table book cover there!

Stuff That’s Good - Kyle and Ethan talk about stuff they are excited about in a new segment where they talk about stuff th at is good.

Story 1 -  Duggar Family Found In Violation Of Ban On Large Gatherings

Story 2 - Investigation Reveals Trump Caused Mass Hysteria So He Could Go On All The Rides At Disneyland With No Lines

Story 3 - Dems Worried Stimulus Bill Would Stimulate Economy

• Democrats under Nancy Pelosi’s leadership shut down a bipartisan Senate bill that would ostensibly go to helping the people and companies shut down by the virus and government mandates

• We discuss a list of all the things both sides are trying to cram into the bill no doubt.

Topic of the Week - G.K. Chesterton On Running After Your Hat- How to have a sense of humor amidst tough circumstances and annoyances. Viewing things rightly.

• The right way to view things -- to find objective truth and meaning in the chaos

• Having the right perspective amid annoyance and inconvenience

• This is far from the worst thing to ever happen to humanity

• Just say, “I’m just chasing my hat” in your daily life!

Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback -  We are told that we need a calvinist on staff again...

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:07:48)

Story 1 - 'Joe Biden Is The Best Choice For Our Nation,' Chants Tulsi Gabbard After DNC Completes Assimilation Process

• Tulsi Gabbard was anti-establishment until she wasn’t. She was anti-war anti-interventionism and now she’s telling people to vote for Iraq war supporting Joe Biden.

• We remember when Ron Paul told everyone to go vote for a third party candidate. Any of them. 

Story 2 - Trump Says, 'I Don't Want Any Americans To Die', NYT Quotes As 'I... Want... Americans To Die'

• The latest example of fake news. The New York Times changes its headline three times to make the Democrats look better in the relief bill obstruction. Went from “Democrats Block…” to “Partisan Divide…”

• Trump press conferences where reporters take him out of context to make the virus response super partisan and political and try to paint him in the worst light. “The virus is a hoax” “Trump is attacking the press.” “Trump didn’t plan ahead or order supplies in time.” “Trump’s response is delayed” “Trump disbanded the pandemic response team” “Trump cut funding to the CDC”, etc... Trump tweeted out this fact check.

• WaPo reporter apologized and deleted the tweet which made it sound like Trump was calling the virus a “hoax.”

• Trump was saying two medicines taken together might prove to be of help for those suffering from the virus, but they’re still looking into it.  NBC/Bloomberg ran a story about how if you take two grams of the substance, it will kill you. That would be like 4X the dosage though. A couple drank aquarium tank cleaner and reporters tried to blame Trump.

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to the man behind RefToons: Paul Cox! RefToons is a free-to-read webcomic, inspired by theology and church history. Paul is a freelance illustrator and cartoonist and has four chickens. 

Paul has previously co-authored and illustrated Pilgrims Progress: A Poetic Journey.

You can pre-order RefToons Collection I now which collects the first two years of RefToons!

RefToons is on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• Paul’s story- who is he? How did he become a Christian?

• Ethan discovers Martin Luther’s insults and he’s like a kid on an airplane for the first time

• Wisconsin stuff and raising chickens

• The master Bill Watterson 

• Calvin & Hobbes, The Far Side, Garfield

• Discovering Michael Horton’s book Christless Christianity

• Problems in the church, unanswered questions, finding answers in expositional preaching and reformed church history

• Reformation theology 

• Love for the imminently quotable G.K. Chesterton

• Cancelled Christian Artists

• The second commandment forbidding images of the persons of the Trinity

• Paul has a Carman story!

• Paul’s new book collection RefToons Collection I which collects all of 2017-2019 and his Pilgrims Progress: A Poetic Journey

Mentioned on the podcast: Greg Koukl’s Stand To Reason Podcast.

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:43:04)

• Hot takes on some of the Reformed/Puritans:

  • Calvin

  • Luther

  • Beth Moore

  • John MacArthur

  • Huldrych Zwingli

  • Jonathan Edwards

  • John Piper

• More Martin Luther potty talk

• Tapping maple trees and other Wisconsin things

• Butterburgers and other fine cuisine

• Loony Toons

• Also Mentioned: R.C. Sproul’s What Is Reformed Theology?

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 3/18/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss the week’s big stories like how our entire society has turned upside down and now the nerds rule, the rise of black markets in hand sanitizer, and how churches our delivering communion elements via drone. They then discuss how we shouldn’t be afraid of coronavirus and how the entire world is under God’s control.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan mull over rejected headlines from subscribers and some of the writers. It’s another exciting segment of ‘Almost A Headline!’.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about heroes as a recurring motif in rock songs, Ethan’s wife video chats Ethan from the furniture store, and the guys discuss how people seem to be doing home improvement projects during this coronavirus shutdown.

Story 1 - Nation's Nerds Wake Up In Utopia Where Everyone Stays Inside, Sports Are Canceled, Social Interaction Forbidden

• Italy Totally Fine Thanks To Universal Healthcare System

  • (From Snopes) The article references a document drawn up by health officials in Turin, a city in Northern Italy hit hard by the virus, with guidelines for if and when “It becomes impossible to provide all patients with intensive care service.” In such a case, the document says, “It will be necessary to apply criteria for access to intensive treatment, which depends on the limited resources available.”

  •  ‘The criteria for access to intensive therapy in cases of emergency must include age of less than 80 or a score on the Charlson comorbidity Index [which indicates how many other medical conditions the patient has] of less than 5.'

Story 2 -  Drug Cartels Switch To Producing Hand Sanitizer

• Ethan and Kyle act out an episode of 'Breaking Purell.'

Story 3 - Churches Switch To Remote Drone Delivery For Communion

Topic of the Week - Latest Numbers On Coronavirus: 100% Of World Still Under God's Control

Everything-- even church-- being shut down from Coronavirus. “Do not be afraid.”- Jesus

Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback - A dramatic slam poetry minute with Dave DeAndrea. You can not miss this beatnik slam poem sesh! 

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 00:53:25)

Kyle and Ethan laugh and mull over rejected headlines from subscribers and the writers.

We love our subscribers! They make what we do at The Babylon Bee possible! Please consider becoming a subscriber!

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans.

Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Jeff Durbin, a Pastor and Elder of Apologia Church in Tempe, a hospital chaplain, outreach minister, and a popular speaker. He’s a martial artist with 5 black belts, has played roles from Mortal Kombat and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and is known for sidewalk ministry and apologetics debates. The guys talk about martial arts, video games, ministry, and Jeff's crazy adoption story. Jeff co-hosts Apologia Radio and Apologia TV, both found at Apologia Studios, and you can find Apologia's outreach resources for pro-life ministry at End Abortion Now.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020! Get a Sneak Peak!

Topics Discussed

• Martial arts

• Sidwalk ministry outside places where abortion takes place

  •  We get Jeff’s thoughts on Abolitionism vs Pro-life activism

  • An abortion doctor in Phoenix pulled out a gun to threaten Jeff’s group

• The arcades being the hangout spots

• Jeff’s video game roles

• Mortal Kombat: The Live Tour

• Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

• MTV’s The Final Fu

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:53:17)

• Real life self-defence stories

• Carman’s music inspires Jeff’s friend

• Behind the scenes with apologist James White

  • What’s the deal with the coogi sweaters?

• Giving knives to children

• Jeff adopted a child who had a medical condition saved from abortion and then God totally healed him.

Also mentioned on the podcast: The King James Only Controversy by James White.

You need to check out this sweet promo reel of Jeff Durbin’s martial arts on display in MTV’s The Final Fu and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

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This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 3/11/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss the week’s big stories like all the democratic candidates joining their powers together into a giant mech to take down Bernie Sanders, Brian Williams’ math makes everything clear for us, and Elizabeth Warren heads back home. ‘Are You Smarter Than A Journalist?’ becomes a real game show and Kyle and Ethan talk about billionaires. 

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan talk about how women have tricked men into cooking and also discuss a Chick-Fil-A miracle. Ethan also pontificates on whether or not flies have souls.

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Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about how we’re not supposed to talk about cognitive decline and flubber-diddles. Ethan got to see comedian Norm MacDonald live. Coronavirus travel restrictions change some of Kyle’s family plans.

Story 1 - Dems Combine Into Giant Mech To Annihilate Bernie Sanders

• Right before Super Tuesday, Pete Buttigieg, Amy Klobuchar dropped out giving Biden a dominating election night.

• Biden got the Robert Francis O’Rourke to endorse him and promised Beto that he could head up his gun control efforts

• After a disappointed Super Tuesday, Bloomberg dropped out and endorsed Biden too.

• Kamala Harris endorsed Biden too.

Story 2 -  Brian Williams To Host New Game Show 'Are You Smarter Than A Journalist?'

• How many people didn’t catch this before airing this segment? Producer, scriptwriter, graphics guy, Brian, guest, etc.

• “Brian Williams” hosts an exciting episode of ‘Are You Smarter Than A Journalist?’ 

Story 3 -  Warren Returns To Tribe In Shame After Failing To Take Land Back From The Pale Faces

• It’s a sad story.

Topic of the Week - Income inequality and the idea that billionaires are just sitting in a vault of hoarded cash and could solve everyone else’s problems if they gave away all their cash. Looking at income inequality from Christian worldview.

Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback -  A reverend complains about having to keep explaining to people that the Babylon Bee is “SPOOF!”

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 00:56:05)

Story 1 - Miracle: Coronavirus Passes Over Houses With Chick-Fil-A Sauce Smeared On Door Posts

Story 2 - Historians: Women Invented Grilling To Trick Men Into Cooking

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome Mike Nelson, former star of Mystery Science Theater 3000, RiffTrax dude, and host of some podcasts. Mike talks to Kyle and Ethan about his story of becoming a Christian, working in an industry that’s not really down with that,  making comedy for all, and how he and Ethan helped ruin VeggieTales. 

You can hear more from Mike Nelson on his podcasts: Like Trees Walking (about Basic Christian Apologetics), 372 Pages We’ll Never Get Back (about bad books) and he semi-regularly joins in with Doug TenNapel and Ethan Nicolle on Audio Mullet! 

Check out the RiffTrax Live 2020 Kickstarter!

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Topics Discussed

• The guys plan out Mike’s tombstone listing his accomplishments

• Mike Nelson’s story and his work on MST3K

• How Ready Player One is terrible

• Coming to faith in Hollywood

• Facing doubts, finding ammunition in C.S. Lewis’ God in the Dock

• Working with people who disagree with you

• RiffTrax events and other podcasts

• Mike Nelson worked on the infamous Netflix run of Veggietales with Ethan

• Hollywood name-dropping and funny things that happened to Mike’s wife

• Seat-fillers at award shows 

Mentioned in this episode: MST3K: Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders (This episode may be a good gateway into MST3K according to Mike Nelson)

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:42:09)

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

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This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 3/4/2020. 

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss the week’s big stories like Mike Pence ordering all the nation’s women to wear special Coronavirus uniforms, Catholics giving up things for Lent which they shouldn’t have been doing anyway, and Joe Biden claiming to be the only person left alive due to America’s gun violence epidemic. We also talk to Annafi Wahed on her new startup TheFlipSide.io which is trying to make Americans listen to each other again.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan talk about a new California bill that seeks to ban all toys that don’t actively confuse your children’s sexuality and also Bernie Sanders’ attempts to draw inspiration from history’s strongest leaders to do what needs to be done.

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Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about Bill & Ted movies, CDC Coronavirus guidelines being implemented to quarantine Ethan, Kyle’s recent trip to a board game geek convention, and how Ethan and Dan had to run the Bee for a few days.

Story 1 - Mike Pence Orders All Women To Wear New Coronavirus-Resistant Uniforms

• Donald Trump announced Mike Pence was leading up the Coronavirus response team.

• 6 people have died in the U.S., Worldwide deaths are over 3000 and its spread to 60 countries so far, stock markets have been shedding trillions of dollars in value.   

• The NORMAL flu causes 12-61 thousand deaths annually

• Media types slammed Pence for praying with the response team for some reason? “We’re so screwed.”

Story 2 - Catholic Plans To Spend Lent Giving Up Something He Really Shouldn't Have Been Doing In The First Place

• Lent/ Ash Wednesday / Fish doesn’t count as meat for some reason. Anti-fish bigotry. 

• Stuff that’s not in the Bible

• Things they are giving up they shouldn’t be doing anyway: 

  • Stop murdering hitchhikers

  • Stop sleeping with girlfriend

  • Refrain from punching babies

  • Pushing old ladies into the street

  • Stop putting bike locks on 7-11s (Kellen Erskine)

  • Stop putting the shopping cart back in the corral (Also Kellen Erskine)

  • Arson

  • Eating tidepods

  • Watching Friends marathon

  • Sleeping with Prostitutes in Grand Theft Auto

  • Crack

  • Performing a ritual to summon Satan (at least not on Fridays)

  • Uttering casual blasphemies

  • Claiming ownership of GK Chesterton

Story 3 -  Joe Biden Claims He Is Only Human Left On Earth Not Killed By Gun Violence

• At a democratic debate, Joe Biden said 150 million Americans had been killed by gun violence since 2007. He was trying to slam Sanders who voted from some bill in 2005 that prevented frivolous lawsuits against gun manufacturers and distributors

• “150 million people have been killed since 2007 when Bernie voted to exempt the gun manufacturers from liability," Biden added. "More than all the wars including Vietnam from that point on."

Topic of the Week - Civil Discourse with Annafi Wahed introducing The Flip Side.io.

Love Mail/Hate Mail/ Feedback -  Dave DeAndrea reads a paranoid hate mail and the guys hire someone who thinks our jokes are lame.

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:09:52)

Story 1 - Bernie Sanders Takes Quiet Moment To Seek Advice From Portraits Of His Favorite Dictators

See Also: Sanders Tests Out New Mustache Styles In Preparation For Becoming Next Totalitarian Icon

Story 2 - California Bill Prohibits Stores From Selling Toys That Don’t Actively Confuse Children’s Sexuality

• ‘Gender neutral’ plan for toys would get rid of boys’ and girls’ aisles in California stores

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle get an exclusive interview with the world famous voice of the Babylon Bee: Dave DeAndrea. After realizing he was not going anywhere in the breakdancing world, Dave found his true calling by putting his golden vocal chords to work. Dave entered the world of Christian music radio and he has translated his talents into a successful, full-time, international career as a voice actor and producer. You know him from such great hits as “Flowerbed” and the intros and outros to the Babylon Bee Podcast which generate more praise than any other element of the show. Here is your chance to listen to an entire episode with that dreamy golden voice filling your ear canals like warm mashed potatoes dripping from a wooden spoon.

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Topics Discussed

• Dave DeAndrea’s story and how he got into Christian radio and voice acting

• Breakdancing with a mullet

• Christian music radio 

• How Ethan and Dave go way back

• Dave meets Cynthia

• Dave dramatically reads hate mail

• Dave’s Christian Testimony

• Adoption

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:47:07)

Bonus Audio - From David D’s 90s Christian radio days on The Cutting Edge

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

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This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 2/26/2020. 

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome Babylon Bee writers: Frank J. Fleming, Chris Cowan, and Nate McMillan. They run down the week’s top stories, take a stab at putting together a story on the spot for Trump’s recent trip to India, and Kyle sings karaoke of John Lennon’s re-released Imagine which gives more realistic descriptions of communism.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan and the writers tell the story of how they became Babylon Bee writers and talk about some of their favorite headlines.

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Show Outline

Intro - Kyle and Ethan welcome the writers: Chris Cowan, Frank Fleming, and Nate McMillan.

Stories Of The Week 

Story 1 - Pete Buttigieg Releases Study Bible With Notes That Explain Why Most Of The Verses Are Wrong / Hasbro Introduces New 'My Butti' Pete Buttigieg Doll

• Other dolls for the other candidates?

Story 2 - John Lennon’s ‘Imagine’  Re-released With More Realistic Description Of Communism

• Kyle sings a karaoke rendition.

Story 3 - Man Forced To Apologize For Whatever He Did In Wife's Dream Last Night

Topic of the Week - The Babylon Bee writers come up with a story on the spot. Join us in the writer’s room.

Hate Mail -  In this special edition of ‘I Really Miss Adam Ford,’ we have Frank J. Fleming read the hate mail we got for an article he wrote.

Subscriber portion (Starts at 01:00:26) 

Everyone tells their story/ how they joined the Bee.

The writers talk about some of their favorite Bee articles.

Bonus Audio

The Lars Larson Show sent us their professionally done version of the Re-Imagine and now we are singing it around the office. Enjoy!

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome Professor Nancy Pearcey. She is professor of apologetics and scholar in residence at Houston Baptist University and author of several books, most recently Love Thy Body: Answering Hard Questions about Life and Sexuality.  Prof. Pearcey's books also include Total Truth, Finding Truth, The Soul of Science, Saving Leonardo and How Now Shall We Live? (co-authored with Chuck Colson). They talk about sexuality, gender, abortion, and Christianity's high view of the human body.

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Topics Discussed

• Abortion... scientific human life vs modern Personhood Theory

• Biological Sex vs Gender

• The Christian’s high view of the material world and the human body due to belief in the incarnation of Christ, the resurrection of the dead, and the new heaven & earth.

• Trusting in a design vs individual revolt against nature and biological realities

• Language as a front in the culture war

• All of our actions endorse a worldview

• What about people who identify as “gay Christians” or some other adjective placed before the word Christian?

• Nudity in medieval Christian art

Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:48:21)

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

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This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 2/19/2020. 

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss the week’s big stories such as the collapse of the Yang campaign, the bipartisan aversion toward the ascendent Bloomberg, and how the 56k modem sound makes us salivate for the internet. The guys then discuss the books that made an impact upon them which means C.S. Lewis, G.K. Chesterton, and J.R.R. Tolkien all feature heavily.  Kyle also tells you which overrated books shouldn’t be considered literary classics. 

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan talk more books, feuding Star Wars clubs in high school, and how Paw Patrol is dismantling the State.

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Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about the origin of “This ain’t it, chief,” talk about all the great feedback we got from the Valentine’s episode featuring the Bee wives, and then dive into the week’s top stories.

Story 1 - Yang Campaign Collapses After It's Revealed $1,000/Mo Giveaway Would Be Paid For With $1,000/Mo Tax Increase

• Yang suspended Presidential campaign aspirations after poor showings in Iowa and New Hampshire

• NEWSWEEK: 72 percent of Democratic primary voters plan on voting for the party's nominee even if their first choice doesn't prevail in the primaries.

• But only about half of both Sanders and Yang's supporters agreed that they would support any second choice.

Story 2 - Bloomberg Stops By Daytona 500 To Hand Out Speeding Tickets

• Donald Trump did a flyover of the Daytona 500 in Air Force One

• Did a pace lap in “The Beast”- the presidential limo

• NASCAR fans seems to love it, blue checks and media types rushed out their hot takes labeling it as problematic

Story 3 - Struggling Biden Campaign Now Offering One Month Of Free AOL For Rally Attendance (Babylon Bee Subscriber Phil VanKlinken contributed to this report)

• Support for Joe Biden in Iowa and New Hampshire didn’t materialize and if he doesn’t pull out a win in South Carolina, he is basically done. His numbers there are under strain too.

Topic of the Week -  Novels or non-fiction books that made us the men we are now. In this special topic the guys are just talkin’ about books! 

• The Hobbit/ Lord of The Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien

• Moby Dick by Herman Melville

• Mere Christianity/ Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis

• Heretics/ Orthodoxy/ In Defense of Sanity/ The Ball and the Cross by G.K. Chesterton

• Pilgrim’s Progress by John Bunyan

• Misery/ Dark Tower/ The Shining and other Stephen King novels

• David Copperfield by Charles Dickens

• Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep

• Dune by Frank Herbert

• H.P Lovecraft books

• 1984/ Animal Farm by George Orwell

• The BFG and other books by Roald Dahl

Love Mail/Hate Mail - We received one of the most touching love mails ever and we got a short hate mail that we have Dave DeAndrea dramatically read.

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:08:27)

Kyle and Ethan talk even more books and Kyle tells a crazy story about the Star Wars clubs at school going all Westside Story. 

Story 1 - In New Paw Patrol Episode, Pups Round Up Commies Around Adventure Bay

• Leftist prof says Paw Patrol is propaganda for "capitalist system that (re)produces inequalities and causes environmental harms"

• "I'll start with the depiction of the state. Mayor Humdinger and Mayor Goodway — kind of the representatives of the state or the government — are portrayed negatively. Mayor Humdinger is portrayed as unethical or corrupt. Mayor Goodway as hysterical, bumbling, incompetent."

• "I would argue that the Paw Patrol, as a private corporation, is used to help provide basic social services in the Adventure Bay community. That's problematic in that the Paw Patrol creators are sending this message that we can't depend on the state to provide these services."

Story 2 - New Political Bible Adds (R) Or (D) After Each Character's Name

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome Samuel Lively, a Christian teacher and the author of Trojan Mouse: How Disney is Winning the Culture War.  He has a MFA in Screenwriting and worked briefly in Hollywood. Kyle and Ethan discuss with Samuel Lively how Disney is infiltrating our homes and revolting against historical cultural norms as they analyze a slew of Disney films.  

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Subscriber Portion (Begins at 00:52:58) 

Hidden Political Agenda in Disney films

-Sleeping Beauty claims women are lazy

-7 Dwarves: ableism, mocking disability

-Fox and the Hound - Clearly a Fox News reference

-Bambi - nuff said 

-Cinderella - anti-woman, lies to get women to wear glass slippers and cut their feet

-Peter Pan encourages kids to snort pixie dust and take an acid trip to never never land

-Alice in Wonderland - Do drugs.

-Brother Bear - Bear propaganda

-Little Mermaid - Men love women when they shut up 

-Jungle Book -  Fathers can be replaced by bears

- Finding Nemo - it is a sin to eat delicious salmon sashimi

- Cars - Buy a Prius

- Tangled - Women with long hair are problematic

- Aladdin - Stealing apples is OK if you sing a Broadway song while running away from the city guards

Topics Discussed

• Sam Lively’s story. Who is he? Where is he from? How did you start thinking about the topic of your book?

• The culture war and how Disney is winning it

• Cultural Commies

• Children’s movies being a vehicle for transmitting worldviews and narratives

• History of Disney (Golden, Silver, Dark Ages, Renaissance, Today)

• Expansion and acquisitions

1937-1942 The Golden Age - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Pinocchio, Fantasia, Dumbo, Bambi

1943-1949 The Wartime Era - Saludos Amigos, The Three Caballeros, Make Mine Music, Fun and Fancy Free, Melody Time, The Adventures of Icabod and Mr. Toad

1950-1959 The Silver Age - Cinderella, Alice in Wonderland, Peter Pan, Lady and the Tramp, Sleeping Beauty, One Hundred and One Dalmatians, The Sword in the Stone, The Jungle Book

1970-1988 The Bronze Age - The Aristocats, Robin Hood, The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, The Rescuers, The Fox and the Hound, The Black Cauldron, The Great Mouse Detective, Oliver and Company

The Disney Renaissance 1989-1999 - The Little Mermaid, The Rescuers Down Under, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, The Lion King, Pocahontas, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Hercules, Mulan, Tarzan

Post Renaissance Era 2000-2009 - Fantasia 2000, Dinosaur, The Emperor's New Groove, Atlantis: The Lost Empire, Lilo and Stitch, Treasure Planet, Brother Bear, Home on the Range, Chicken Little, Meet the Robinsons, Bolt

The Revival Era 2010-Present - Princess and the Frog, Tangled, Winnie the Pooh, Wreck it Ralph, Frozen, Big Hero 6

Pixar -- counterfeit revival?

Live action remakes

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

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This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 2/12/2020. 

In this special Valentine’s episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann, creative director Ethan Nicolle, and producer Dan welcome their wives onto the show: Destiny, Jessica, and Chandra.  This episode was recorded on Kyle and Destiny’s wedding anniversary, Ethan and Jessica’s first date anniversary, and Dan and Chandra’s awkward texting anniversary. Love is in the air on this special episode of the Babylon Bee podcast as they tackle the week's biggest stories.

In the subscriber portion, the couples face off in The Dating Game, where the rules are entirely too vague for Kyle’s finely tuned gaming palate, but everyone still has a fun time!

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Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle, Ethan, and Dan introduce their better halves and give them permission to speak. We then dive into the stories of the week.

Story 1 - AOC: 'You Cannot Literally Wrap Your Head Around Something, You Would Get Hurt'

• AOC immediately fulfilled our boomer meme with comments about bootstraps and shoelaces. 

• Other idioms AOC will attack?

• What do the ladies think about AOC? 

Story 2 - Garnier Fructis Introduces The Biden Collection

• Biden recently told a woman in New Hampshire that she was lying about being to a caucus and called her a “Lying Dog-Faced Pony Soldier”. 

• Destiny informs the men how to pronounce Garnier.

Story 3 - Woman Advertising 5 Different MLMs On Back Of Minivan Must Be Extremely Rich, Successful

• The women discuss their favorite MLM schemes and products and we question why there is a culture in the church that seems to replace fellowship with marketing

Story 4 - Man Shows Sacrificial, Christlike Love For Wife By Throwing Socks In General Direction Of Laundry Basket 

• We learn disgusting truths about the guys from the wives.

Story 5 -  'The Milk Is Nowhere To Be Found,' Reports Husband Staring Directly At Jug Of Milk

• The struggle is real.

Topic of the Week -  For Valentine’s Day, the gang discusses their stories, how God brought each couple together, funny things that happened on first dates, and how the romantic-at-heart Ethan is upstaging other men in the love department.

Hate Mail/ Feedback - We get an email from someone who can’t believe Christians would lie and deceive their elderly mother about something Bernie Sanders would say.

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:10:43)

Dating game

• If your spouse could go anywhere for a free vacation for a week, where would they go?

• What’s their favorite book of the Bible?

• What adjective best describes your spouse’s family?

• Your spouse wins the lottery. What is their first big purchase?

• Spouse’s most annoying habit?

• Who is the better driver?

Parting marriage and parenting advice.

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome a special guest: Twitter personality Titania McGrath (A.K.A. Andrew Doyle). Titania McGrath is a self-described activist, healer, and radical intersectionalist poet committed to feminism, social justice and armed peaceful protest. A regular on the live-slam poetry scene, Titania regularly performs at arts festivals, deconsecrated churches and genderqueer spiritual retreats. Her unique blend of art and activism has been variously described as 'inspiring', 'groundbreaking' and 'woke'. 

You can check out Titania’s new book Woke: A Guide to Social Justice

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Topics Discussed

• Who is Titania McGrath?

• How do her tweets work? 

• What are the targets of the satire?

• What is the nature of satire?

• Does Titania punch down?

• What is white privilege?

• Can comedy redeem culture and society?

• BREXIT

• Intersectionality/Wokeness

• Where’s the line we shouldn't cross in satire?

Subscriber Portion starts at 00:39:12

This is the Babylon Bee weekly news podcast for the week of 2/5/2020 with special guest host ADAM FORD. 

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome the creator… of the Babylon Bee: Adam Ford. They discuss the week’s top stories like CNN’s coverage of the problematic panel of experts doing something about the deadly coronavirus, now multiple Bernie staffers advocating violent revolution, and Trump’s State Of The Union address where the guys make predictions about media reactions (by the time this episode airs, you can see how prophetic they were).

In the subscriber portion, Kyle, Ethan, and Adam talk Superbowl half-time sex show, Brexit finally happening, and how our government’s legitimacy is forever gone now since Republican Senators didn’t just do whatever Democrats say.

Adam Ford is now in the real news business. 

Check out his new site DISRN. You can also sign up for the daily Adam Ford Newsletter.

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Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan welcome the Babylon Bee creator Adam Ford, discuss Kyle’s recent trip to a libertarian conference, and come up with a theme song for DISRN.

Story 1 - CNN Condemns D-Day Soldiers For Lack Of Diversity

• Trump tweeted out a photo of his task force. I guess it was all white males.

• "We will continue to monitor the ongoing developments," the President said in his post. "We have the best experts anywhere in the world, and they are on top of it 24/7!"

• CNN recently posted an Coronavirus task force another example of Trump administration's lack of diversity… 

  • “It's a statement that's as predictable as it is infuriating: President Donald Trump's administration lacks diversity… They communicate a "patronage network that everyone is operating under," as Eric Yellin, an associate professor of history and American studies at the University of Richmond, told The Washington Post last year, about a different set of photos. "Having that network be interracial is really important. But the visuals that have come to define the Trump administration say something else, too. They signal which people in a multi-racial, half-female country Trump values the opinions of: mostly white men who are mirror images of the President himself.

Story 2 - Uh-Oh: Sanders Campaign Texting 'Gulag For You' To People Who Aren't Voting For Bernie

• Project Veritas (James O’Keefe) continues to release candid camera clips of Bernie state campaign staffers (latest video highlights four of them)

• No Comment from the campaign

• No corporate media is covering it

• They’re all still employed.  

Adam Ford Recommendation:  Go read the Gulag Archipelago by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn.

Story 3 - Trump To Deliver State Of The Union In Scuba Gear To Avoid Drowning In Liberal Tears

• Official responses have already been released before the address:

• Snopes: FALSE

• New York Times: Detailed analysis of every person making an OK hand sign during the speech 

• Buzzfeed: Take this quiz to find out what emoji best represents your opinions

• Max Boot: Op ed - I was gonna become a Republican again until this speech

• Alex Jones: Not one word about water turning the frogs gay.

• Mike Pence: smiles, nods

• CNN: (laughs uncontrollably)

• Fox News: Flawless victory

• Marianne Williamson: To really know the State of the union we must consult with these Himalayan salt crystals I got on Etsy

• Greta Thunberg: (play audio)

• Vox: buy these special 3D racism glasses to see all the racism you missed last night 

• Jordan Peterson: (gnaws london broil)

Topic of the Week -  Is the news worth paying attention to? How much should it take up our lives? How political should we be? With Adam Ford.

Hate Mail/ Feedback - Apparently we are cowards.

Paid-subscriber portion (Starts at 01:03:12)

Story 1 - Halftime Show Reduces Risk Of Wardrobe Malfunction By Eliminating Most Of Wardrobe (Subscriber Brandon Gaster contributed to this report)

• Jennifer Lopez and Shakira performed at the Super Bowl Halftime show featuring stripper poles, kids in cages, and Puerto Rican flags.

Story 2 - Millions Drop Dead As Brexit Finalized

• See also Ethan’s lit photoshop on: Boris Johnson Blows Conch Shell, England Carried Away By Herd Of Manatees

Story 3 - Dems Who Ran Sham Impeachment Hearings Shocked As Republicans Run Sham Impeachment Trial

• Dan reads Adam Savage's insane tweet.

Kyle's kids make an appearance and shove a firetruck into Ethan's backside.

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome back popular podcaster and resident expert on anarchism, the “new” right, and North Korea: Michael Malice. He is the author of Dear Reader: The Unauthorized Autobiography of Kim Jon Il and The New Right: A Journey to the Fringe of American Politics. He is also the podcast host of  "YOUR WELCOME" and Night Shade. Kyle and Ethan continue their efforts to convert him into Michael Mercy and discuss strange sea creatures, visiting North Korea, and why anarchists hate Presidents so much.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Topics Discussed

Anarchy Hecktopia Owned

• Your house is burning down, do you put the fire out with liberal tears?

• What would the children pledge allegiance to?

• Who would indoctrinate the children?

• Who would deliver Amazon prime?

• What war criminals would we print on money?

• What would we do with the Hall of President?

• What would we call Lincoln Logs?

• What would they rename Washington State?

• Who would take my money and tell me what goods and services I need?

• Who would kill Jeffrey Epstein?

• Who would shoot the dogs?

• Who would you rather have run national parks? Costco or Sam’s Club?

• Who would be the best anarchist president?

North Korea

• You’ve been to North Korea. Tell us about that. What was it like getting off the plane? Isn’t there a travel ban to going there?

• Western journalists endangering North Korean citizens’ lives

• Thought crimes when you’re always being watched

• Kim Jong Un worship. Was it real? 

• What dystopian novel gets closest to the reality? 

• Black markets

• North Korea’s cult of the gun and military

• How is Trump’s handling of Iran and North Korea?

Anarchy and Political Theory

• Michael Malice tries to think of top 5 Presidents and ends up rating his 5 worst Presidents, and mentions something weird about Grover Cleveland

• Michael Malice delves into the heart anarchy

Miscellaneous

• The power of social media and the strange alliances against progressivism, strange sea creatures, and how sometimes it is a sin not to eat the ham.

The entire interview is available for Babylon Bee subscribers only…

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This is the Babylon Bee Weekly News Podcast for the week of 1/29/2020.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome guest host Michael Malice to discuss this week's stories like how Democrats sowed doubts about the legitimacy of the 2020 Presidential election, a CNN analyst claimed to provide “satire” to his Twitter audience, and how knee-jerk conservatives don’t always respond to AOC the right way. They then dive into the main topic of how corporate media tries to weave narratives going beyond the plain facts of current events.

In the subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan discuss more about the impeachment proceedings, Trump being the first President to speak at large March for Life crowd, and how Bernie Sanders is now alt-right adjacent for touting his Joe Rogan street cred.

You can find Michael Malice’s podcasts “YOUR WELCOME” and Night Shade here.

You can also buy Michael Malice’s book The New Right.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan welcome Michael Malice, talk about the recent and tragic death of Kobe Bryant among several others in a nearby helicopter crash, and Kyle threatens to call the cops on the anarchist.

Story 1 - Democrats Warn That American People May Tamper With Next Election

• Back in December House Impeachment proceedings Jerry Nadler Said We Can't 'Trust an Election' to Get Rid of President Trump

• Nadler is missing some of the proceedings because his wife has pancreatic cancer.

• The house case managers act as prosecutors in the Senate trial. Adam Schiff (CA congressman) opened Senate trial on Wednesday by saying “The president’s negligence cannot be assessed at the ballot box (in November), because we cannot guarantee that that vote will be fairly won,” and without foreign interference requested by Trump, Schiff said.

• Apparently they are mind readers about his intent behind the plain words of the call transcript. “If not remedied by his conviction in the Senate and removal from office, President Trump’s abuse of his office and obstruction of Congress will permanently alter the balance of power among the branches of government,” the 59-year-old congressman said.

• Schiff accused Trump of attempting to “use the powers of the presidency to cheat in an election.”

Story 2 - In Major Deal, The Babylon Bee Purchases Competing Satire Site CNN

• Joe Lockhart CNN political analyst (Comms for Clinton WH) sent out a dumb tweet recently: “Overheard convo between two Republican senators who only watch Fox News. “is this stuff real? I haven’t heard about any of this before. I thought it was all about a server. If half the stuff Schiff is saying is true, we’re up shit’s creek. Hope the White House has exculpatory evidence” 

• The Babylon Bee responded: “Leave the satire to us; we’ll leave the fake news to you.”

• Joe went on to tweet: “Ok maybe I made up the convo, but you know that’s exactly what they’re thinking.”

Story 3 - Dumb AOC Accidentally Strangles Herself Tying Her Shoes (Because She Is So Stupid)

• Conservatives don’t always intelligently handle the case against socialism from principle or history or economics. Too often often they resort to “She Dumb” memes

Topic of the Week - Michael Malice joins Ethan and Kyle to discuss how Malice’s conception of “The Cathedral” relates to current events like the Impeachment and election campaign season. 

• “The Cathedral” according to Malice, is the collective of political, media and cultural entities who frame the worldview or narrative in a way that becomes the contemporary consensus seeking to control the narrative of neoliberalism/progressivism for our society and lives and institutions

• Impeachment analysis in The Cathedral. What is going on?

• We always poke fun of CNN and others for being biased and lefty.  Is something more insidious going on? 

Hate Mail- welp, these happened so we do a rapid-fire hate mail segment.

Paid-subscriber portion

Story 1 - Nation Immediately Forgets All About Historic Impeachment Trial After Realizing It's Taco Tuesday

• No one is watching (4.7% of voting age adults)

• The Nielsen ratings for Wednesday and Thursday showed that ABC, CBS and NBC lost a combined 3 million viewers per day by airing the Senate impeachment trial instead of the daytime soaps

• No one cares (approval ratings seem to be same or slightly better since impeachment)

Story 2 - 'Absolutely Nothing Happening Today,' Says CNN Reporter Gesturing Toward Massive Crowd At March For Life

• Donald Trump made history Friday as the first-ever president to attend and address the major annual pro-life rally March for Life, telling attendees, "All of us here today understand an eternal truth: Every child is a precious and sacred gift from God."

• "Every human life, born and unborn, is made in the holy image of Almighty God."

• The theme for this year’s march is “Pro-Life is Pro-Science.” About 100,000 were expected to attend the event, but the number may have been a lot more than that. Ford Fischer, a journalist with News2Share, said on Twitter that the best estimate he was able to get was from an organizer who said 200,000 to 300,000 were there today.

Story 3 - Bernie Sanders Welcomed As Newest Member Of Alt-Right After Joe Rogan Endorsement

• Joe Rogan endorses Bernie

• Bernie shares the clip touting Rogan’s support

• Leftists on twitter and in corporate media upset 

• Supposedly Joe is “Transphobic, alt-right racist”

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome special guest McGill Alexander, a former South African Army officer, who was on assignment in Taiwan as South Africa’s military attaché when a notorious murderer and rapist broke into his home and held his family hostage at gunpoint for 26 hours. McGill and his daughter were both shot but survived. McGill and his wife forgave their captor, gave him a Bible, and led him to Christ. Kyle, Ethan, and McGill talk about what it means to love your enemies as Jesus taught us to do.

You can read McGill’s account in his book Hostage in Taipei : A True Story of Forgiveness and Hope.

A re-enactment of McGill’s story was broadcast by National Geographic Channel in their Locked Up Abroad series of docudramas (2008). You have to purchase the episode so make sure you are viewing Season 1, Ep. 10: "Taiwan".

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Topics Discussed

• McGill’s story

• How this hostage event happened and who the criminal was

• McGill's Christian faith

• How did McGill get through this horrible event?

• Forgiveness- what is it and what does it look like?

• How long did it take to forgive, was this a process, and what was going through his mind as all this was happening?

• Is forgiveness completely unconditional? 

• Does forgiveness condone the evil?

• The death penalty

• How should Christ's forgiveness shape our thinking about His command to forgive others?

• We live in a “show no mercy” culture nowadays, especially on social media. How does forgiveness shape how we approach this culture?

The full interview is for Babylon Bee subscribers only so...

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In this episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss this week's stories like the media hyping up a white nationalist rally which turned out to be a peaceful gun rights protest, a Bernie Sanders staffer getting caught preaching the benefits of gulags, and Nancy Pelosi catching flack for handing out commemorative pens to celebrate a somber day of impeachment. In the subscriber portion, Kyle, Ethan and producer Dan discuss the deaths of Christopher Tolkien, the death of Rush lyricist and master drummer Neil Peart, and talk about how much money a gang of known criminals is telling you they want to take from you.

Doug TenNapel, a friend of the Bee, has a new Earthworm Jim Kickstarter.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan talk about Ethan’s proficiency with a mandolin slicer, hilarious Amazon reviews, and how Disneyland is getting old for Kyle’s kids. Kyle tells Ethan he is as beautiful and perfect as a Trump phone call.

Story 1 - Media Offers Thoughts And Prayers That Someone Would Start Some Violence At Gun Rights Rally

• VA government is considering several gun control measures such as: a return to Virginia’s one-handgun-per-month purchase policy; red flag laws; and universal background checks for all gun sales except those among immediate family members, through inheritance or antiques.

• Big media and blue checkmarks hyped up the protest rally as a "white nationalist rally" and militias and insurrectionists who were going to be threatening. See Ben Collins' now-deleted tweet or this montage of CNN and MSNBC for example.

• "They're not coming to peacefully protest. They are coming to intimidate and cause harm," Gov Northam said declaring a state of emergency and banning all carrying of guns in the capital square.

• 22,000 gun rights activists showed up and finished peacefully. They even cleaned up after themselves.   People were openly and legally carrying firearms, including AR-style rifles, outside the gun-free Capitol Square.

Story 2 - Bernie Sanders Clarifies His Gulags Will Be Democratic Gulags

• Project Veritas (James O’Keefe, a conservative political activist) releases undercover video of one of Bernie Sanders’ “top tier Iowa organizer” Staffer Kyle Jurek saying cities [will] burn” if President Donald Trump is re-elected, “free education” policies to “teach you how to not be a "flowerbed"-ing nazi.”; 'There is a reason Stalin had Gulags'; 'Expect violent reaction' for speech. If Bernie doesn't get nomination "Milwaukee will burn"... Project Veritas says they have more clips of more people too.

• The video has millions of views, almost zero coverage in mainstream media, and zero comment from Sanders campaign.

Story 3 - Pelosi Releases Limited-Edition Replica Of Dentures Worn During Trump Impeachment

• 'They claim it's a somber, serious occasion they're heartbroken over...and then they pass out impeachment-signing pens with special cases.'

• The pens look like they are especially engraved, with gold, and were brought out on silver platters of some kind.

Hate Mail - We got a special flowerbed-filled hate mail this week that trashed us and our audience.

Topic of the Week - Martin Luther King, Jr. Day and Race

1. MLK Jr was the most visible spokesperson for civil rights through non-violent protest movements inspired by Mohatma Ghandi/India Independence. 

2. 1955 organized Montgomery bus protest after Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat.

3. Fought against desegregation and for voter’s rights

4. In 1963 March on Washington gave his 'I Have A Dream' speech

5. In 1964 won the nobel peace prize.

6. Was investigated and spied on by the government for his supposed communist sympathies

7. Assassinated in Memphis, TN in 1968.

8. Joe Carter of TGC has 9 things you need to know about him. 

9. Dr. Robert Gagnon points out some of the controvery in modern evangelical circles regarding whether we should we praise King while condemning Trump.

• Is MLK cancelled? 

• Conservatives and leftists both try to make MLK Jr supports their views on social justice, economics, or affirmative action.

• What does the Bible say about race?

• What did MLK’s speech actually say ( we read from lengethier sections)

  • "I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal."

  • "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

  • “Unearned suffering is redemptive.” Ethan also mentions Man’s Search For Meaning

• What are some principles we can apply to the race issue to cut through the noise

• Balancing caring for the oppressed and not pushing victim narrative

• Who gains from all the racial conflict? Who Ioses if the outrage stops.

Paid-subscriber portion

Story 1 - Peter Jackson To Honor Christopher Tolkien With 578-Film Adaptation Of 'The Silmarillion'

• Christopher Tolkien died at age 95 this past week. Anything Middle Earth that came out after JRRT published LOTR is because of his son Christopher’s editing and publishing them. 

• Peter Jackson made 3 whole movies out of the children’s book The Hobbit for some reason.

• Christopher didn’t like the LOTR movies (action movies for teenagers)

• He edited and posthumously published his father's work on The Silmarillion, Children of Húrin, Fall of Gondolin, Beren and Lúthien, and much more.

Story 2 - Warning: Gang Of Known Criminals Holds Meeting To Discuss How Much Of Your Money To Steal

• National Review has a list of all their spending plans in the context of national debt hitting $28 Trillion by end of decade before their ideas are put in place.

• Democrats try to say the costs are offset by savings elsewhere

• Taking all of these proposals together, Democrats would increase federal spending by around $40 trillion over the next ten years. To put that in perspective, the federal government will take in approximately $3.3 trillion in taxes this year and spend $4.1 trillion this year.

Story 3 - Church Drummers To Play 70-Minute Solos In Honor Of Neil Peart This Sunday

Rush lyricist and master drummer Neil Peart died at age 67 this past week. 

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Editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk with pastor and author Joe Thorn. Joe is the founding and Lead Pastor of Redeemer Fellowship in St, Charles, IL, the author of several books (such as the Life of the Church, The Heart of the Church, and The Character of the Church), and co-host of the podcast, Doctrine and Devotion. Kyle and Ethan ask Joe tough questions in a round of Sin Or Not Sin, discuss his former Satanism, and talk cigars. 

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Kyle and Ethan ask for pastoral advice in a round of Sin Or Not Sin:

• Vaping like a total cheesebag

• Throwing up the sign of the horns while listening to heavy metal

• Jazzercise

• Well-done steak

• Reading a Doug Wilson article

• Tattoo of John Piper’s face

• Sprinkling a baby with water for some reason

• Following Beth Moore on Twitter

• Following John MacArthur on Twitter

• Reading Relevant Magazine

• Reading Pulpit & Pen

• Drinking IPAs when there’s perfectly good bourbon nearby

Topics discussed

• Thoughts on Reformed Theology and what the benefits may be of finding a church which subscribes to a historical confessional document

• Satanism

• Joe's openness about smoking cigars since he has written on Christians smoking cigars

• Joe's latest hot take: “I want my kids to stay away from Christian Twitter almost as much as pornography.” 

Some of this interview is in our premium Babylon Bee Subscriber Lounge, so...

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In the thirty-second episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle discuss this week's stories like the outbreak of World War III, CNN settling a lawsuit for defaming a teenager, and the recent geriatric beef between Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders. Producer Dan Coats joins them to tell our stories about how we all became Christians. So, tune in to get to know the Bee boys. In the premium subscriber portion, Kyle and Ethan discuss Epstein conspiracy theories, Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes, and the internet not having it with Vince Vaughn shaking the President's hand.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan discuss how instagram is designed for the kids, the new format where going forward there will now be two separate podcast shows (one for the news stories and one for our exclusive interviews), and how Kyle wasn’t murdered by an internet stalker. We also take a moment to mark the death of Sir Roger Scruton.

Story 1 - As Part Of Settlement With Nick Sandmann, CNN Hosts Must Wear MAGA Hats During All Broadcasts

Story 2 - Everyone On The Internet Awarded Honorary Degree In International Affairs

Story 3 - Warren, Sanders Settle Campaign Dispute By Playing Chicken On Mobility Scooters

Topic of the Week - Kyle, Ethan, and Dan talk about their stories and how they became Christians.

LOVE MAIL - An email from a listener warmed all of our hearts and encouraged us to keep going.

Paid-subscriber portion

Story 1 - Tragic: Footage Of Epstein Suicide Found Hanging In Cell

Story 2 - Man Driving Alone In Carpool Lane Informs Officer His Preferred Pronoun Is 'They' (From Babylon Bee Subscriber Robert Johnson)

Story 3 - Hollywood Celebs Shocked To Learn Some People Do Not Adore Them

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In the thirty-first episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk with Dave Rubin about freedom of speech, his journey from being a left progressive to a classical liberal, and how Star Wars: The Last Jedi was a total cinematic failure. Dave is an American political commentator, YouTube personality, stand up comedian, talk show host and total Star Wars nerd. He is the creator and host of The Rubin Report, a political talk show on BlazeTV and YouTube.  

You can now pre-order Dave Rubin's book: Don't Burn This Book: Thinking for Yourself in an Age of Unreason.

Content creators, check out Dave's new Patreon-alternative Locals.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan discuss the stories of the week.

Story 1 - San Francisco Dogs Begin Bagging People Poop

Story 2 - Democrats Call For Flags To Be Flown At Half-Mast To Grieve Death Of Soleimani

Story 3 - Thousands Of Panicked Terrorists Surrender As Trump Deploys Jack Wilson To Middle East

Interview - Dave Rubin

Kyle and Ethan discuss with Dave Rubin the differences between the political left and right, his journey from left progressive to classical liberal. and how leftism is destroying comedy, journalism, and movies (like Star Wars).  They also discuss which private mega-corporation should run the government in a libertarian utopia where everything is privatized.

Hate Mail - an iTunes reviewer isn't a fan of our giggling.

Paid-subscriber portion

Story 1 - Woman Who Scoffs At Your Religion Still Checking Her Horoscope Every Day

Story 2 - Woman Slapped By Pope Sells Hand For 1.3 Billion Dollars

Story 3 - Castro’s Campaign Fails As Democrats Realize His First Name Isn’t Fidel

Dave Rubin Interview (continued)

We're putting some of this riveting interview with Dave Rubin in the Subscriber Lounge, so...

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In the thirtieth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle get ready to say goodbye to 2019 and ring in the new year with a rock-star apologist: Greg Koukl. He’s an accomplished author, speaker, radio host, founder and president of Stand To Reason, an adjunct professor at BIOLA, and he guarantees he can convince anyone to become a Christian in three minutes or less. Well maybe that last part was a bit of an exaggeration, but Greg believes that when Christianity and its values are clearly articulated they can “stand to reason” in the public square. They discuss apologetics fails, how to bring your faith into a conversation without being totally awkward, and what the goal of apologetics really should be.

Greg Koukl’s 10th anniversary edition of Tactics: A Game Plan For Discussing Your Christian Convictions is available now.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan open up some bubbly sparkling water to ring in the new year, discuss the Babylon Bee’s top ten stories of 2019, and make bold predictions for 2020.

Top 10 Bee Stories of the Year

10 - Bernie Sanders Arrives In Hong Kong To Lecture Protesters On How Good They Have It Under Communism

9 - In Genius Move, Trump Supports Impeachment, Forcing Democrats To Oppose

8 - Disney CEO: 'To Avoid Filming Among Depraved, Immoral People, We Are Moving All Our Georgia Operations Back To Hollywood'

7 - Portland Police: 'We Wish There Were Some Kind Of Organized, Armed Force That Could Fight Back Against Antifa'

6 - Ocasio-Cortez Appears On 'The Price Is Right,' Guesses Everything Is Free

5 - Walmart Discontinues Auto Part Sales To Prevent Car Accidents

4 - Georgia Lawmaker Claims Chick-Fil-A Employee Told Her To Go Back To Her Country, Later Clarifies He Actually Said 'My Pleasure'

3 - Husband Daycare Now Available At All Hobby Lobby Locations

2 - Ilhan Omar Withdraws Support From Bill To Save The Earth After Learning That’s Where Israel Is

1 - Motorcyclist Who Identifies As Bicyclist Sets Cycling World Record

Predictions for 2020

Interview - Greg Koukl

Kyle and Ethan discuss with Greg the Babylon Bee's 10 Arguments For Christianity That Are Guaranteed Mic Drops and get into some listener submitted questions for Greg.

Topics Discussed

How did Greg end up becoming an apologetics guy?

How do you start a conversation about God without coming off like a total tool?

What do you do when Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses come to your door?

At what point is it a sin not to share the gospel with a stranger?

What do you wish Christians would shut up about? What are the WORST arguments you hear from your own side?

Hate Mail - We get podcast reviews. Also, this story has been passed around as being real and the comments are interesting: Trump: 'I Have Done More For Christianity Than Jesus'

Paid-subscriber portion - The interview with Greg Koukl continues and he takes some questions submitted by Babylon Bee readers.

"Can people of other religions that don't know Christ or are so devout to their own way they never even allow themselves to hear and choose Him be saved by the grace of God?" -Jonathan

"Why doesn't God reveal himself in undeniable ways like he did in the Bible? Why does it seem that as mankind's ability to test and verify supernatural claims goes up, supernatural occurrences go down?" -Daniel

"I’ve always wondered if there was a rebellion in God’s pre-human heaven, what would prevent the possibility of another rebellion in eternity?" -Michael

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In the twenty-ninth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome back recurring guest and film expert Brian Godawa. They discuss the recurring existentialist theme in film of “just follow your heart” which always works out okay because our hearts are not idol factories or anything. In the subscriber portion, they go through the best all-time pro-life films (whether they intended to be or not).

Brian Godawa is an award-winning Hollywood screenwriter (To End All Wars), a movie and culture blogger specializing in God, Movies, and Worldviews, author of a textbook, Hollywood Worldviews: Watching Films with Wisdom and Discernment as well as an Amazon best-selling author of Biblical fiction (Chronicles of the Nephilim/Chronicles of the Apocalypse).

Movies/Shows Mentioned

Veggietales In The House episode: Laura At Bat

Joe Vs. The Volcano

Stranger Than Fiction

The Truman Show 

Groundhog Day

City Slickers

13 Conversations About 1 Thing

Titanic

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

I Heart Huckabees

Unstrung Heroes

Box of Moonlight

Forrest Gump 

Shopgirl

Synechdoche, New York

The Fault in Our Stars

Boyhood

Frozen

Also mentioned: 

Mike Rowe on Don’t Follow Your Passion

Ben Shapiro Interviewing Neil Degrasse Tyson

Paid-subscriber portion: 
Brian Godawa gives us his list of the most pro-life movies, whether it was intentional or not. 

Pro-life movies mentioned:

Juno

Bella

The Island

Knocked Up

Three Extremes

Waitress

17 Again

August Rush (adoption)

October Baby

Room 

Into the Forest 

Unplanned

Gosnell

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In the twenty-eighth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome you to the Babylon Bee Christmas Special which will be much much better than the Star Wars Holiday special. Well, at least better than The Last Jedi. Kyle and Ethan talk to Captain Andy Miller of the Salvation Army, bring in two scholars to debate the existence of Santa Claus, talk Christmas movies, and read listener submitted stories.

Pre-order the new Babylon Bee Best-Of Coffee Table Book coming in 2020!

And if you need a last-minute Christmas gift, get someone a Bee subscription!

Show Outline

Stories Of The Week: Christmas stories over the years

Story 1 (2018) - Mall Santa Arrested For Punching Man Who Denied Divinity Of Christ

Story 2 (2017)- New Museum Memorializes Fallen Heroes In The War On Christmas

Story 3 (2016)- Starbucks Unveils New Satanic Holiday Cups

Dramatic Poem: The War On Christmas

Interview: A conversation with Captain Andy Miller III of The Salvation Army. Andy Miller is a sixth-generation Salvation Army officer who loves Jesus, his family, and the opportunity to serve God through The Salvation Army. He and his wife, Captain Abby Miller, have been officers since 2007. Andy is Area Commander of The Salvation Army - Tampa.

Main Topic: Christmas

• The Great Debate for the Existence Of Santa with William Lane Kringle and Scrooge McDawkins

• Kyle and Ethan’s Top Five Christmas movies:

  • #5 Kyle: Die Hard, Ethan: Jingle All The Way

  • #4 Kyle: Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer, Ethan: Gremlins

  • #3 Kyle: Home Alone, Ethan: Die Hard

  • #2 Kyle: It's Christmas Time Again, Charlie Brown, Ethan: A Christmas Story

  • #1 Kyle: The Santa Clause, Ethan: Home Alone

• Listener submitted Christmas stories

Paid Subscriber Portion:

Should you tell your kids Santa is real? Kyle, Ethan, and Dan debate.

More listener stories

Ethan and Kyle share their own Christmas stories

Dave DeAndrea reads NOEL By JRR Tolkien

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In episode twenty-seven of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to James Breakwell, proprietor of Exploding Unicorn, whose social media reach is in the millions. James is a professional comedy writer and author of several books, most recently How to Save Your Child from Ostrich Attacks, Accidental Time Travel, and Anything Else that Might Happen on an Average Tuesday. They discuss parent shaming, dad fails, surviving insane animal attacks, and how getting famous writing comedy for a living is extremely repeatable.

Follow James Breakwell on Twitter (@XplodingUnicorn).

Show Outline 

Introduction -  Kyle tried out his improv routine on Ethan and Ethan makes it weird and uncomfortable.  They get into a discussion about weird names like Melvin.

Story 1 - Gardener In Background Of Kaepernick Video Receives Call From Washington Redskins

Story 2 - 'Rise Of Skywalker' To Introduce First Lesbian AT-AT

Story 3 - Bombshell Report Reveals Trump Has Been Mooching Off Pence's Netflix Account For Years

Interview - James Breakwell

Hate Mail And Love Mail 

Subscriber-Exclusive Content - 

Story 1 - House Hears Testimony From Renowned, Unbiased Legal Scholar Hillga Clintonheimer

Story 2 - 'Guardians 3' To Feature Most Sinister Villain Yet: Single-Use Plastic Bottles

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In episode twenty-six of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk to Mike Adams who is a professor at UNC-Wilmington, a TownHall.com columnist, and a speaker on college campuses on first amendment issues and abortion. They talk about how he won his federal case against the university on free speech grounds, why college campuses are even crazier than you think, and how the bill of rights was produced by Hitler. 

Follow Mike Adams on Twitter.

Show Outline 

Introduction - Kyle and Ethan welcome everybody into the Christmas season, unless you are a grumpy Presbyterian or something, with a discussion about Christmas traditions like seeing lights with the family, drinking hot cocoa, and watching sappy movies that make you cry.

Story 1 - Narwhal Tusk Surrender Bins Installed Throughout The UK

Story 2 - New Greta On The Shelf Doll Will Track Your Climate Sins

Story 3 - Judge Grants IPad Sole Custody Of Young Boy It Raised In Parents' Absence

Interview - Mike Adams

Hate Mail - A special hate mail reading by Dave DeAndrea.

Subscriber-Exclusive Content - The second part of the Mike Adams interview gets salty. Also Kyle and Ethan reveal unused headlines and give a behind-the -scenes peak of the creative process here at the Babylon Bee.

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In episode twenty-five of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome back Brian Godawa to talk about epic films where individuals are willing to live and die for transcendent values set in all-encompassing civilization-shaking settings, and a lot of people get stabbed. They also talk about the secular-sacred divide in films and the genre of "Christian" movies.

Brian Godawa is an award-winning Hollywood screenwriter (To End All Wars), a movie and culture blogger specializing in God, Movies, and Worldviews  (www.Godawa.com), author of a textbook, Hollywood Worldviews: Watching Films with Wisdom and Discernment as well as an Amazon best-selling author of Biblical fiction (Chronicles of the Nephilim/Chronicles of the Apocalypse).

Follow Brian on Twitter. 

This episode is sponsored by the Christian Standard Bible, specifically their CSB Study Bible.  This English translation strives to be faithful to the original languages without sacrificing clarity. To inspire you to grow in your understanding and love for God’s Word, the CSB Study Bible contains an award-winning array of study resources, including over 16,000 study notes, tools, and word studies. Now available in eight different cover options, including two new covers. Whether you are preparing for future Bible studies or daily readings, this study Bible is the ideal resource for lifelong discipleship. Learn more at CSBible.com or visit LifeWay.com to order your copy of the CSB Study Bible today.

Show Outline 

Thanksgiving Introduction - Kyle, Ethan, and producer Dan give thanks for our jobs, you, the Babylon Bee audience, and great food in this Thanksgiving special episode.  Of course, they also run down 7 Ways You Can OWN Your Liberal Relatives This Thanksgiving This Year. Then they welcome Brian Godawa to discuss whether an epic movie must include lots of people being killed by swords and dive into the idea of transcendence in which there are some things that are higher to live for than just yourself.  

Movies/Series Discussed -  

Braveheart

Troy

Gladiator

The Patriot

Star Wars

The Lord Of The Rings

Game Of Thrones

Exodus: Gods And Kings

Noah

Ben Hur

Rob Roy

Mad Max: Fury Road

30 Days Of Night

I Am Legend

Topic Of The Week: Kyle, Ethan, and Brian discuss the Secular/Sacred Divide In Film. Is this a false dichotomy? Does art need to be explicitly Christian to be profitable or valuable for Christians? 

Hate Mail - Jabba The Hutt makes an appearance and accusations of racism stream in.

Subscriber-Exclusive Content: Resident Movie Expert Brian Godawa reveals his top movies of all time including some pro-life films.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In episode twenty-four of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome back Kira Davis, political commentator, writer, filmmaker, and activist.  In this episode they discuss Chick-Fil-A's donation shift, Kanye and Osteen, Christians and the culture wars, and women in church leadership.

Kira Davis is editor-at-large at RedState and can be heard on her podcasts: Smart Girl Politics and Just Listen To Yourself.  She recently co-wrote and directed the short film Minty about the heroism of Harriet Tubman.

Follow her on Twitter @RealKiraDavis.

Show Outline

Introduction - Kyle, Ethan and Kira talk about Kira's first appearance on the Babylon Bee podcast, how Ethan's wife who happens to be a nurse sprang into action to save a pregnant woman recently, and how Kira's family was unimpressed by Santa.

Story 1 -  Joel Osteen Leads Kanye West To Top Of Lakewood Church To Tempt Him With All The Kingdoms Of The Earth In Their Splendor

Story 2 - Capitol Building To Be Decorated As Giant Circus Tent For Duration Of Impeachment Hearings

Story 3 - Chick-Fil-A Trades Adoring Christian Fans For Outraged Mob That Won't Be Appeased Until Their Every Demand Is Met

Topics Of The Week - Kyle, Ethan, and Kira talk about how Christians can be involved in the culture without being compromised, whether art needs to affirm our beliefs and worldview, whether or not Harriet Tubman would carry an AR-15, favorite horror films, representing Jesus by doing excellent work, and why we don't want to be Europe.

Hate Mail 

Subscriber Exclusive Content: Womyn Preachers

Kyle, Ethan, and Kira talk about the ‘Go Home’ Controversy between John MacArthur and Beth Moore, women in ministry, the differences between men and women in general, the "OK Boomer" meme, the tremendous blessing of having kids, and how the government seems to have replaced the home as the primary focus of society.

Become a paid subscriber here.

In episode twenty-three of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview Scott Adams, the world famous creator of the Dilbert comic strip, a modern-day Nostradamus, and the New York Times best-selling author of Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter.  He famously predicted Trump's election through a psychological analysis of persuasion.  He discusses with Kyle and Ethan his most recent book LOSERTHINK: How Untrained Brains Are Ruining America.  

Follow Scott Adams on Twitter.

This episode is sponsored by the Christian Standard Bible, specifically their CSB Study Bible.  This English translation strives to be faithful to the original languages without sacrificing clarity. To inspire you to grow in your understanding and love for God’s Word, the CSB Study Bible contains an award-winning array of study resources, including over 16,000 study notes, tools, and word studies. Now available in eight different cover options, including two new covers. Whether you are preparing for future Bible studies or daily readings, this study Bible is the ideal resource for lifelong discipleship. Learn more at CSBible.com or visit LifeWay.com to order your copy of the CSB Study Bible today.

Intro- Kyle and Ethan discuss seeing Kellen Erskine's show. Kyle went to a Switchfoot concert. Kyle got sick.

Story 1 -  Millennial Wishes There Were Some Historical Examples Of Socialism We Could Study To Have Some Idea How It Might Turn Out

Story 2 - ABC News Claims Story On Epstein Was Accidentally Thrown Out Then Shredded Into Tiny Pieces And Incinerated

Story 3- CNN Criticizes Pregnant Woman For Shooting Poor, Defenseless Man Who Was Simply Seeking Asylum In Her Home

Interview: Scott Adams

Hate Mail- Podcast Reviews

Paid-subscriber portion -

Story 1- The Babylon Bee has been coming up with handy infographics for use as media guides. Like The Babylon Bee Explains Assault Rifles  and A Style Guide For News Organizations

Story 2- Authorities Horrified At Woman Who Killed Baby With Meth Instead Of Traditional Brain-Sucking Device

Ethan and Kyle 

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In episode twenty-two of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview Dr. Strange director Scott Derrickson in reverse time. They discuss real cinema VS. not-real cinema, progressive Christianity, the horror genre, the spiritual themes of Dr. Strange, and much more.  

Scott Derrickson is an American film director, producer, and screenwriter. He co-wrote and directed The Exorcism of Emily Rose, directed The Day the Earth Stood Still starring Keanu Reeves, teamed up with producer Jason Blum to write and direct Sinister, Directed Deliver Us From Evil, Derrickson next co-wrote and directed the film Doctor Strange.  Derrickson will direct the Doctor Strange sequel entitled Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness with a planned May 2021 release.

Follow Scott Derrickson on Twitter, Instagram

This episode is brought to you by Dwell: the new audio Bible app recommended by Bible teachers like Matt Chandler, Ann Voskamp, and many others! Dwell's mission is to transform the way you experience Scripture. This beautiful audio Bible app comes with 4 unique narrators, peaceful background music, and loads of features to help you dive in to the Word. Dwell is giving all Babylon Bee readers 33% off an Annual Subscription to the app. You can visit dwellapp.io/babylonbee to get your discount...and start using your ears to renew your mind. 

Stories Of The Week

Story 1 - Progressive Utopia Of California Becomes First State To Eliminate Electricity Entirely

Story 2 - Always Appeals To Men With Pads Featuring Pictures Of Monster Trucks, Pro Wrestlers

Story 3 - Motorcyclist Who Identifies As Bicyclist Sets Cycling World Record

Interview: Scott Derrickson (Part one)

Hate Mail / Q&A

Paid-subscriber portion - Scott Derrickson (Part two)

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the twenty-first episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by Brian Godawa to talk about horror movies. Are they evil? Does God hate horror? Brian, often called “The Horror Apologist,” weighs in. While some may think the timing is a little strange—it being the Devil’s holiday and all—rest assured this is our fall harvest episode that only happens to fall on the same day as pagan-pumpkin-demon day.

Brian Godawa is an award-winning Hollywood screenwriter (To End All Wars), a movie and culture blogger specializing in God, Movies, and Worldviews  (www.Godawa.com), author of a textbook, Hollywood Worldviews: Watching Films with Wisdom and Discernment as well as an Amazon best-selling author of Biblical fiction (Chronicles of the Nephilim/Chronicles of the Apocalypse). Follow Brian on Twitter. 

Movies/Horror genres discussed

The Rules of Horror

Scream

The Wicker Man

Zombie

28 Days Later franchise

Shaun of the Dead

The Walking Dead

Vampires

The Addiction

I am Legend

Twilight 

Serial killers (the modern vampires)

Seven

Brian Godawa’s Short Film Cruel Logic 

Dexter

Subscriber-Only Portion

Midsommar

It

Deliver Us From Evil

The Exorcism Of Emily Rose

The Exorcist

The Blair Witch Project

Paranormal 

[Rec]

The Last Exorcism

Also Mentioned: Third Eagle Of The Apocalypse Doom And Gloom 

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In the twentieth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview Ben Howe about being a dirty #NeverTrumper, and convince him to render unto Trump. Ben is an author, columnist, podcaster, television writer, film­maker and award-winning political ad producer. His new book is Immoral Majority: Why Evangelicals Chose Political Power Over Christian Values. He can be heard weekly on his podcast The Fifth Estate.  

Ben Howe is on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

Get Ethan's new children's novel, Brave Ollie Possum. Order directly from the publisher or on Amazon.

Stories Of The Week

Story 1 -  Keith And Kristyn Getty Struggling To Come Up With Word That Rhymes With 'Substitutionary Atonement'

They actually made one.

Story 2 - RNC Raising Money To Help Democrats Televise Five Debates A Week

Story 3 -  Satan Endorses Paula White's New Book

Interview: Ben Howe (part 1)

Hate Mail 

Paid-subscriber portion: Ben Howe (part 2)

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the nineteenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview the Babylon Bee's creator, founder, and part-owner, the elusive Adam Ford. Adam is also known for his comics at Adam4D.com, and as the founder of the new news site Disrn.com and the Adam Ford Newsletter. Many readers have claimed the Babylon Bee changed after Adam sold the Babylon Bee. Adam absolutely destroys Kyle and Ethan, reads hate mail, talks about how he came to faith, as well as what he is up to these days. This is Adam's first podcast interview ever, so buckle up and get ready to be part of history.

Show outline with links...

Story 1 -  In Reboot Film, Bibleman Goes Back In Time To Stop Satan From Planting Dinosaur Fossils In The Earth

Story 2 - Ellen Outed As Conservative After She Treats Others With Respect

Story 3 - Survey Finds More People Would Support Impeachment If They Knew What Crime Trump Was Supposed To Have Committed

Adam Ford Interview 

Hate mail is included in the interview

Subscriber exclusive portion - Kyle and Ethan discuss some classic Babylon Bee stories

Story  4 - Holy Spirit Unable To Move Through Congregation As Fog Machine Breaks

The first article Kyle ever sent to Adam.

Story 5 - Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Listen to this episode on our podcast page or subscribe on your favorite podcast platform here.

In the eighteenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview stand-up comedian Kellen Erskine. Kellen has been featured on other lesser-known shows such as Conan, Jimmy Kimmel, and America’s Got Talent. He was also one of the comedians featured on the Amazon Prime docu-series Inside Jokes. They talk about the stigma of “clean comedy,” navigating a commonly profane profession as a Latter-Day-Saint, and Kellen shares some of his showbiz horror stories and moments of inspirational triumph.

Kellen’s appearance on Conan

Kellen's special Composed, on Amazon Prime

Kellen’s Website

Kellen On Twitter

Kellen on Instagram

Also check out the new audiobook from Babylon Bee writer Frank Fleming, Hellbender

Show outline with links...

Story 1 - Kanye West Joins The Newsboys

Story 2 - Media Horrified By Lack Of Violence At Joker Screenings

Story 3 - Media Warns Excessive Forgiveness Could Set Back Outrage Narrative Hundreds Of Years

Interview: Comedian Kellen Erskine

Hate Mail 

Paid-subscriber portion:

Kellen talks about bombing on Jimmy Kimmel and in front of Robin Williams. Ethan tells the story of his miserable attempt at an open-mic night. Ethan and Kyle answer a subscriber question about how satire is not always necessarily meant to be funny.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the seventeenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview lib-owner-in-chief Candace Owens. They talk about her recent run-in on C-Span, children being used as political props, marriage advice, and more. At one point in the interview, Owens is left literally speechless. Kyle and Ethan also go over recent news stories in front of their first live studio audience: A guy named Joe.

This episode is brought to you by InsideTheStreet.com
Enter the promotional code NOPETOSNOPES for your two-week free trial.

Stories of the week:

Story 1 - Evangelical Leaders Ask Trump Which One Of Them Will Betray Him During Impeachment Proceedings

Story 2 - Prodigal Son Kicked Back Out After Old Tweets Surface

• Also referenced: Homeless man reject charity after searching Twitter history 

Story 3 - Democrats Introduce Debate Strategy Of Holding Up Small Child Whenever Their Positions Are Challenged

Interview: Candace Owens

Referenced video of Candace at white supremacy hearing on C-Span

Love mail: podcast reviews! Please, leave us your own review on iTunes!

Paid-subscriber portion: Ethan tells his disgusting ear-drop story, then Kyle and Ethan read unused or yet-to-be-published headlines

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Listen to this episode on our podcast page or subscribe on your favorite podcast platform here.

In the sixteenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by graphic novelist Doug TenNapel, creator of the legendary videogame Earthworm Jim, the artist of the famous Five Iron Frenzy album covers, and writer/artist of several graphic novels. Doug is one of the most outspoken Christians in videogames and comics. He and his old team are bringing back Earthworm Jim in a new videogame and Doug has a new Earthworm Him comic book in the works. Check out his record-breaking Indiegogo Campaign before it ends on September 27th!

Follow Doug TenNapel on Twitter

Check out Doug's YouTube channel

Listen to Doug and Ethan's other podcast, Audio Mullet

(3:38) Disaster At Union Seminary As Giant, Angry Carnivorous Plant Does Not Accept Students' Apologies

(9:59) Saudi Arabia Closes Down New Chick-Fil-A Location For Disappointing Lack Of Homophobia

(13:42) Liberals Clarify Their Racism Is Actually Democratic Racist

(16:58) Interview: Doug TenNapel talks about Earthworm Jim, the Five Iron Frenzy covers and more...

(35:50) Hate Mail: People think Trump window at Liberty University is real. Referenced story: Liberty University Criticized After Unveiling Stained Glass Window Depicting Donald Trump

(45:05) Subscriber Exclusive Portion: Doug tells his Carman story and talks about experiences working in the PC climate of Hollywood animation industry.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Listen to this episode on our podcast page or subscribe on your favorite podcast platform here.

In the fifteenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay, of the famed "Grievance Studies Affair" who submitted hoax studies to academic journals and got three of them accepted. Peter and James are self-proclaimed atheists who are politically liberal, but their work exposing how certain areas of academia prioritize narrative above truth is not only important but hilarious. They also care a lot about having meaningful disagreements and are actively fighting "cancel culture." We talk to them about the Grievance Studies Affair as well as their new book, How To Have Impossible Conversations. They also have a new project for facilitating impossible conversations called New Discourses.

As usual, Kyle and Ethan also get into a few news stories including John Bolton the walrus, vaping AR-15's, and Monopoly for Christian women. They extend the conversation with Peter and James in the subscriber-exclusive portion of the episode.

Follow Peter Boghossian on Twitter

Follow James Linday on Twitter

(7:12) John Bolton Waves Goodbye, Returns To Sea To Be Walrus Again

(11:02)  New Version Of Monopoly For Christian Women Has You Recruit All The Other Players Into A Pyramid Scheme

(15:56) More E-Cigs Being Disguised As AR-15s To Avoid Ban

(19:43) Interview: The Grievance Studies Affair and How To Have Impossible Conversations with Peter Boghossian & James Lindsay

(56:57) Hate Mail

(1:00:51) Paid Subscriber-Exclusive: Continuing the conversation with Peter and James about the insanity of academia, the ridiculous things their papers endorsed, and how social justice is like a cult (and also Gremlins)

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the thirteenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by Red State's editor-at-large Kira Davis. Kira joins for the entire episode to discuss current news stories and then get into the main topic: race. How do we handle it as a society and as individuals? What should the conversation be like? What is the Christian response to the race issue? How does the concept of grace fit into an issue so weighed down by history? We dig into these heavy topics and more.

Follow Kira Davis on Twitter

Listen to Kira on Smart Girl Politics, and Just Listen To Yourself

Stories of the Week

(10:09) CNN's 7-Hour Climate Change Town Hall Loses In Ratings To 'Baby Shark' Being Played 185 Times In A Row

(15:48) White Girl Turned Into Pillar Of Pumpkin Spice After Looking Back At Starbucks

(24:18) Walmart Discontinues Auto Part Sales To Prevent Car Accidents

(33:02) Main Topic: Race and grace

(1:16:06) Hate Mail

(1:24:08) Paid Subscriber Portion: Kira talks about that time she was on Dr. Phil, the time she was kicked out of the 2010 Democratic National Convention, and her experience with drive-by shootings.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the thirteenth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by Bridget Phetasy. Bridget is a writer and comedian who became known across the Twitter-verse when she started challenging the woke narrative of other liberals and comedians and not towing the approved political line. Her recent article, The Battlecry Of The Politically Homeless, is the subject of discussion this week. Bridget joins us for the entire show.

You can follow Bridget on Twitter (Please be warned that her feed can be R-rated, both in words and pictures) and check out her podcast Walk-Ins Welcome. She also has a new show on YouTube called the Weekly Dumpster Fire.

The Babylon Bee podcast hosts a wide range of guests, both Christian and non-Christian. We believe it's important to hear from a variety of perspectives, even ones we may disagree with. Please note that we do not necessarily endorse every position or statement made by our guests. We encourage you to listen to and consider their viewpoints respectfully.

Stories of the Week

(3:49) Snopes Rates Biden's Claim That 2+2=5 As 'Mostly True'

The referenced Snopes story: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/joe-biden-war-hero-story/

(10:52) Lego Introduces New Sharper Bricks That Instantly Kill You When You Step On Them

(17:55) Liberals Clarify They Only Want Black Voices To Be Heard When They're Saying Liberal Things

(32:26) Main Topic: Being Politically Homeless

Bridget's article: The Battlecry For The Politically Homeless

(1:00:11) Hate Mail

(1:05:52) Paid Subscriber-Exclusive Portion: Bridget talks about her experience spending three weeks in an Australian offshoot of the Rajneesh cult.

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the twelfth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle talk about the strange world of church camp, both sharing their own experiences as well as stories that were sent in by readers. As usual, a few news stories are covered and hate mail is dramatically reenacted by Dave.

Stories of the Week and relevant timestamps:

7:47 Chick-Fil-A Installs Confessionals So You Can Repent From Eating At Popeyes

(Also includes Judas Isacriot Eats Popeyes and the Trumpets stories)

(13:46) CNN: 'Our Ratings Are Only Tanking Because Trump Is Killing Off Viewers By The Millions'

(17:25) Jesus Ratioed On Twitter For Saying 'Love Your Enemies'

(23:02) Main Topic: Church Camp Horror Stories

(1:00:23) Hate Mail!

(1:06:00) Paid Subscriber-Exclusive Portion: More church camp horror stories

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Kyle and Ethan are joined by Brian Godawa for their first all-movie episode. They dig into the worldviews of various films and talk about how story is used to convey messages, sometimes more Christian than expected, and sometimes blatantly anti-Christian. 

Guest Brian Godawa is a screenwriter and novelist. He has spent a lot of time dissecting the worldviews and themes of film. For more Brian Godawa:

Brian Godawa on Twitter

Brian Godawa’s website (where you can find everything)

Brian Godawa’s Blog "Thus Spake Godawa”

Dive into Brian’s novels:

Chronicles of the Nephilim

Chronicles of the Apocalypse

Brian’s book on worldviews in film

Hollywood Worldviews

Movies of the Week!

(4:08) Science Fiction & AI

Some of the movies/series discussed: 

Alita Battle Angel, Westworld, Better Than Us, Hunger Games

(20:37) The Walking Dead & Zombie Films

Some of the movies/series discussed: 

The Walking Dead, Shaun Of The Dead, 28 Days Later, 28 Weeks Later, The Exorcism Of Emily Rose

(38:10) Discussion of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood 

(46:31) Topic of the Week: Anti-Christian/Anti-Conservative bias in Hollywood

Some of the movies/series discussed:
The Boyz, Unplanned, Gosnell, Bohemian Rhapsody, Valkerie, Walk The Line, Tolkien, To End All Wars, Captain Marvel, Hidden Figures, Finest Hours, Unbroken, Room, Black Panther, Hacksaw Ridge, God’s Not Dead, Exodus, Noah, Paul, Madmen 

Brian’s The Boys Amazon Series analysis

(1:13:08) Hate Mail

(1:20:51) Paid Subscriber-exclusive portion: Marvel Universe discussion

Some of the movies/series discussed:
Captain America, Captain Marvel, Avengers, End Game, Daredevil, Antman, Spiderman, Hulk, Dr. Strange

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Referenced links with timestamp:

(5:02) CDC: People With Dirt On Clintons Have 843% Greater Risk Of Suicide

(10:28) Extremists On Left, Right Eliminate Each Other In Violent Clash, Nation's Problems Finally Over

(16:21) YouTube To Run All Potentially Offensive Content Past Easily Spooked Possum

(20:36) Topic of the Week: Civil Discourse

(40:51) Hate Mail: Android hate mail!

(49:59) Paid Subscriber Portion

(52:57) Husband Daycare Now Available At All Hobby Lobby Locations

(1:00:12) Hipster Church Introduces Vape Organ

(1:05:31) Do you ever feel despair over our current political and cultural situation? 

Become a paid subscriber! at https://babylonbee.com/plans

In the ninth episode of the Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle are joined by Kevin Max from DC Talk to discuss what people think when they find out you're a Jesus Freak, whether or not he still loves rap music, and who came up with the famous lyric "HAO HAO HAOOW!" They also discuss the Christian music industry, the odd world of Christian celebrity, and Kevin's prolific solo career.

Kyle and Ethan also discuss a few news stories and read some hate mail as usual.

Links we refer to in the show with relevant timestamp:

Stories of the Week

(5:16) Study Shows Leading Cause Of Gun Violence Is Those You Disagree With Politically

(15:57) Experts Warn We Have Only 12 Years Left Until They Change The Timeline On Global Warming Again

(21:25) Museum Of The Bible To Display Original Golden Tablets Containing 'Jesus Freak' Lyrics

(28:48) Interview: Kevin Max (part 1)

Ryan Tedder's Kevin Max Impersonation

Kevin's Website

Kevin Max on Twitter

Buy Kevin's Album Black Sheep Of The Fold

Kevin Max On Spotify

Kevin Max On Instagram

(51:36) Hate Mail

Paid Subscriber Portion

(56:05) Kevin Max Interview (Part 2)

(1:11:38) Democratic Socialist Convention Forced To Communicate Via Interpretive Dance To Avoid Offending Any Attendees

(1:18:16) White Privilege Card Now Good For 10% Off At Whole Foods

(1:21:53) Unused headlines!

Become a paid subscriber! at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Show Notes!

Kyle and Ethan are joined by Babylon Bee CEO, Seth Dillon to discuss the controversy surrounding Snopes and their recent and past coverage of the Babylon Bee. 

Relevant links:

Seth Dillon appears on Fox News! https://twitter.com/TheBabylonBee/status/1157352307408941056

Adam Ford’s Tweet-thread

(1:00) Introductory interview with Seth Dillon

Stories of the Week

(9:44) Georgia Lawmaker Claims Chick-Fil-A Employee Told Her To Go Back To Her Country, Later Clarifies He Actually Said 'My Pleasure'

(18:25) Democrats Demand Kavanaugh Submit To DNA Test To Prove He’s Not Actually Hitler 

(27:15) Thanks To New Laws, VeggieTales Finally Introduces New Cannabis Character 

(35:39) MAIN TOPIC: Snopes! (if you jump here, be warned that we cover this topic throughout the entire episode as well) 

(51:16) Hate Mail

(1:00:36) Subscriber Exclusive Segment

(1:01:24) Facebook Hires Drax The Destroyer To Distinguish Between Satire, Fake News

(1:06:13) Trump Spends Afternoon Shouting From White House Balcony During Twitter Outage

(1:12:15) Subscriber update and what we are working on

Become a paid subscriber! at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Guest: Michael Malice

Michael's book: The New Right  “The definitive firsthand account of the movement that permanently broke the American political consensus.”

Follow Michael Malice on Twitter (FYI Malice is not a Christian and does use salty language at times, though not on THIS podcast. Also he's a literal anarchist. You've been warned!) 

Warning: while there is no bad language in this episode we do get into more serious and sometimes uncomfortable topics. 

(1:42) Introductory interview with Michael Malice

(11:32) Biden Vows To Return Nation To Era When Press Didn't Bother Reporting On President's Scandals

(18:28)  Trump 2020 Campaign To Simply Air Unedited Footage Of Democrats Talking 

(29:29) All Looney Tunes Shorts To Receive Epic Live-Action Remakes 

(35:56) MAIN TOPIC: Comedy as a Weapon 

(52:27) Hate Mail

(56:59) Subscriber Exclusive Segment

(57:24) Progressive Immediately Shouts 'White Supremacy!' At Every Image In Rorschach Test

(1:11:14) Plan To Put Women On The Moon Canceled After They Find Out How Cold It Gets

Become a paid subscriber! at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Join editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle for the sixth-ever Babylon Bee podcast. This week's main topic is faith and politics. 

(8:22) Impressed Military Drops Portland Antifa In Hostile ISIS Territory To Continue Doling Out Justice

(14:10) Christians Should Be More Like Jesus, Who Was Loved By Everybody And Never Divisive

(20:10) Women's Soccer Team Sues To Overturn Unjust Law Of Supply And Demand

(25:50) Topic of the Week: Faith & Politics

(39:09) Hate Mail

(45:33) Subscriber Exclusive Segment

(46:23)  Genetically Engineered Dinosaurs Break Out Of Creation Museum, Live Peacefully With Humans

(51:15)  Food Possessed By Demons After Family Forgets To Pray

(55:40) Unpublished Headline reading

Become a paid subscriber! at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Join editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle for the fifth-ever Babylon Bee podcast. This week's main topic is youth groups.

(3:38) Trump Enraged As Immigrant Child Asks Him For More Gruel

(11:29) Story 2 Joe Biden Promises His Followers Eternal Life

(16:40) Churchgoer Takes A Knee In Protest As Newfangled Chorus Added To Classic Hymn

(24:46) Topic of the Week: Youth Group

(44:12) Hate Mail - With dramatic reading by Dave DeAndrea!

(49:12) Subscriber Exclusive Segment

(52:08)  'Why Doesn't Our Church Have More Programs?' Asks Family That Never Volunteers For Anything

(55:32) Crunched For Time, Pastor Pads Out Sermon With Random G.K. Chesterton Quotes

(1:02:15) Questions this week:

• How do you deal with the issue that some people will think your stories are real?
• Why so many bass player jokes?
• Do you do satire of other religions?
• Who are the most easily offended in your experience? Conservatives? Progressives? Reformed folks? Prosperity?

Become a paid subscriber! at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Join editor-in-chief Kyle Mann, creative director Ethan Nicolle, and special guest host Frank Fleming for the fourth ever Babylon Bee podcast. And yes, it's that Frank.

Get Frank Fleming's Book, Heckbender (warning, H-E-double hockey sticks is in the actual title). Also, Sidequest is amazing.

(5:26) Trump Enters Konami Code, Gains Infinite Terms

(10:21) Kool-Aid Man Protests Wall

(13:12) Modern-Day Good Samaritan Tweets About Republicans

(20:03) Main topic: Behind the Babylon Bee headline submission process

(42:49) Hate Mail

Bonus Content (Paid Subscribers Only)

(48:14) Punching Grammar Nazis

(56:45) AOC On The Price Is Right

(1:03:02) Q&A

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Join editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle for the third ever Babylon Bee podcast. Besides it being the historical number three episode, this is also the first ever interview, featuring conservative millennial Allie Beth Stuckey.

Here are the week's news stories with timestamp:

(7:06) Ocasio-Cortez Gets Head Stuck In Bucket

(14:00) Liberals Confused By New Medical Procedure

(22:48) Mother Seeks Emergency Surgery To Remove VBS Songs

(30:10) Interview w/ Allie Beth Stuckey

(55:53) Hate mail

(1:03:53) Bonus! (Subscribers Only)

(1:04:43) Church Employs Homeless Musician Thinking He Was New Youth Pastor

(1:12:00) Man Dies Of Old Age In Church Parking Lot

(1:16:26) Q&A 

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Join editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle for the second ever Babylon Bee podcast. 

NOTE: The day after this episode was recorded, Ethan's book Bears Want To Kill You was put back up on Amazon without explanation. He has no idea why they put it back up, or took it down in the first place, or if it will stay up. 

Here are the week's discussed news stories with timestamp:

Story 1 (5:10) -  Essential Oils For Men Now Available

Story 2 (11:40) - Elizabeth Warren Promises to Cure Smallpox

Story 3 (15:55) - Study: Hate Clicks Are A Major Source Of Web Traffic And Also 'The Princess Bride' Is A Trash Movie That Only Stupid People Like

Topic of the Week (24:10) - Fathers  

Bonus Content (paid subscribers only)

Bonus Story 1 (49:53) - New School Program Raises Awareness Of Things Kids Didn't Know They Were Supposed To Be Offended About

Bonus Story 2 (56:25) - Rookie Mistake: Sound Guy Accidentally Unmutes Background Worship Singers

-Subscriber Q&A (1:02:28)

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

Join editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle for the first ever Babylon Bee podcast. 

This week's new stories with links:

Sports Illustrated Burkini (5:29):
https://babylonbee.com/news/sports-illustrated-unveils-first-ever-baptist-swimsuit-model-in-floor-length-denim-skirt

That Crazy Copeland (12:11)
https://babylonbee.com/news/kenneth-copeland-unveils-new-luxury-jet-that-runs-on-the-souls-of-the-deceived

Trump's Lands Free Chips and Salsa Deal (17:30):
https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-secures-unlimited-chips-and-salsa-in-mexican-trade-deal

Main Topic: the Bee Origin Story (24:05)

Hate Mail Of The Week: (44:37)

Bonus Content (paid subscribers only)

-Gay Pride Week

-YouTube Radicalizing Left And Right To Have Actual Conversations

-Subscriber Q&A

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans