Parenting Our Future

By Robbin McManne

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Description

Up to this point in history, children have been seen as less than and parented in a way that uses power over a child. Most of us were parented in this way but there is a shift in thinking about the way we raise our kids. Parents don’t feel good about using shame, blame, criticism, punishments, and even rewards, to get their kids to listen. Parents are wanting a different way because they know from their own childhoods this type of parenting hurts and leaves us with scars we take with us through our adulthood. Each one of my episodes is designed to help you navigate the difficult journey of parenting but in a way that is more peaceful and intentional. I’ll show you how to get your kids to listen and cooperate without yelling, punishments and rewards. I’ll show you how to understand your own feelings and those of your kids. My intention is to bring you to a place where you feel connected with your kids and yourself (we often get lost when we become parents!). Tune in weekly for all the inside tips, tools and tricks I teach my private clients to help you build the family you always wanted, and to become the parent you always envisioned you would be. I promise to provide you with fun and entertaining content that will leave you seeing your kids and your reactions in a whole new light! Please make sure to share the episodes that give you goosebumps, and leave you feeling inspired! I am always grateful for every person who subscribes, leaves a review and rates my podcast 5 stars.

Episode Date
POF10: When Is It Ok To Push Your Kids?
19:18

Did you know that allowing your kids to be dependent actually allows them to be Independent?  we get stressed and worried about where kids are, in terms of what they can and can't do, that we lose our objectivity.  This means we can't see that our kids need to take the time they need to learn developmental skills.  We are often impatient and get caught up in the busyness of life and trying to get them to do things, often too early, that we are actually getting in the way of letting natural development to unfold.

I’ll share with you when you should push your child and when you should provide a cushion for them. 

Learn about the most important three letter word to add to your kids’ vocabulary (and yours!).

You may feel totally justified in pushing your child do something, but they’re really resistant.  What do you do then?  I ask you to consider what you are demanding of your kids and why.  Could it be that what the issue isn’t that your child is resistant but rather, the problem is what you are demanding of them in the first place? 

Listen on to find out all these answers and more!

 

About Robbin McManne

Robbin is a Certified Parent Coach, author and speaker.  She works with parents from all over the world to help them build more connection and find more joy and cooperation to their parenting.

Robbin is a former ‘Angry Mom’ and for over 12 years, Robbin juggled a full-time corporate career while being a mom and wife, prior to becoming a Parenting Coach.  In her corporate career, Robbin has a background in marketing and public relations, training, and event planning. She understands firsthand how many moms struggle to balance work and family. 

It’s because of her struggles as a parent that she found the world of peaceful parenting and has dedicated her life to teaching parents how to build a strong family, so their kids thrive. 

Robbin’s work focuses on building and strengthening the parent child relationship so that children grow up with resilience, confidence and strong emotional intelligence.  She works with parents to help them understand their own emotions and frustrations in parenting, so they can help build their children’s sense of self without losing themselves in the process!

In October of 2018 Robbin released her first book, “The Yelling Cure – How stress less and get your kids to cooperate without threats & punishments.” Her book is being read by parents all over the world 1000,000 copies sold to date. www.yellingcurebook.com

Robbin divides her time working with her clients, speaking at events and spending time with her two boys and husband.  You can usually find her at a hockey rink or sports field cheering on her boys. Most importantly, Robbin has changed the way she parents and connects with her sons and is dedicated to helping parents find the same joy, connection and cooperation in their families.

www.yellingcurebook.com

Robbin@parentingforconnection.com

www.parentingforconnection.com

www.facebook.com/parenting4connection

www.instagram.com/robbinmcmanne_parentcoach

 

From the Podcast:

When should we push and when do we provide a cushion? Use these considerations.  Adapted from “The Yes Brain” by Dr. Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

When should we push?

At times our kids need us to challenge them to go beyond themselves and remove their self-imposed bubble wrap and ask them to risk facing challenges they’re not used to.  You can challenge your kids and allow them to develop resilience and strength and toughness and grit. Here you are pushing the envelope…not physically pushing them into danger!

When we step in and rescue a child from a problem they can handle on their own, we short-circuit their opportunity to learn how to address a difficult issue or understand their capacity to handle hard stuff

When do we provide a cushion?

If you pushing your child causes stress which then floods their nervous systems into distress because they aren’t ready and it’s just too uncomfortable for them, it can backfire and make them more dependent, fearful and less willing to try new things.  You can also provide a cushion when they are facing an obstacle too big or a challenge they simply can’t address by themselves. Something they truly can’t handle themselves.  

Considerations for Pushin’ and Cushion

  •   What is your child’s temperament and developmental stage? – what can seem like a baby step might feel like jumping off a cliff for your child so they might need to take baby steps and offer a bit more of a cushion.  Or maybe your child could withstand some discomfort and might need more pushing. 
  •       What does your child need right now? Pay attention to how your child responds and what that exposes about their needs in this moment.  Attune to the actual internal experience and not what you think they should be feeling.
  •       Are you clear on what the real issue is? Do you know why your child is resisting facing this obstacle or dealing with this particular challenge?  This requires you to talk to your child and understand what the real issue is. Then you can help them problem solve – make sure this isn’t about you and your own insecurities.
  •       What messages do you send about risk-taking and failure?  What we want to be passing along here is a life lesson.  Sometimes you have to face your fears and be willing to try and fail.  Is failure ever acceptable to you? Do you send messages about doing everything just right or perfectly?  Is mistake ever embraced as a learning opportunity in your family? Mistakes are a part of life and a shared human experience so they should be as normal as successes.
  •   Does your child need skills to handle potential (and inevitable) failure?  The goal isn’t to protect your child from failure but to build skills that lead to overcoming adversity.  Like something being difficult doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. Introduce the concept of yet when you child says I can’t do it or I’m not ready.  Invite them to add the word yet. This promotes an attitude of possibility that offers tremendous power that plants the seed for your child that they will be able to succeed and achieve as long as they’re willing to prepare themselves to persist and to work toward that success

 

One of the most powerful words you can add to both your and your child’s vocabulary is the word YET. 

Check out Sesame Street’s video “The Power of Yet”  https://youtu.be/XLeUvZvuvAs

Here are some great examples of how to use it. 

I can’t do this …YET

This doesn’t work …YET

I don’t know …YET

It doesn’t make sense …YET

I don’t get it …YET

I’m not good at this …YET

 

There is a difference between not knowing and not knowing YET

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to

www.facebook.com/parenting4connection

 

With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism.  We have too much of that! I honor each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

 Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

 

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

 

Sep 17, 2019
POF09: Peaceful Discipline
20:40

I’m asked all the time what punishments parents should use and when should kids be punished.    Well…In short, I don’t believe in punishments.  I don't believe in them because I think it distracts from the important reasons WHY your child is acting the way they are.   

When I talk about peaceful parenting, it’s parenting without punishment and it doesn't mean that sometimes there isn’t a need for what you would call natural consequences.   What I talk about in this episode is about how to peacefully connect with your child by putting the relationship first.  BUT, this doesn’t mean that it's a free-for-all for your child.  Your kids do not run the show!  Parent need to be the ones in charge, the ones that sets the boundaries the expectations. This issue becomes muddied and difficult for parents because when their child is behaving in a way they don't want does, something rude or destructive, talks back or just us something bad, parents usually go to punish because they don’t have any other tools.  In this podcast, I give you the tools to not punish, to seek to understand your child’s behaviour and if absolutely necessary, create a natural consequence. 

About Robbin McManne

 

Robbin is a Certified Parent Coach, author and speaker.  She works with parents from all over the world to help them build more connection and find more joy and cooperation to their parenting.

Robbin is a former ‘Angry Mom’ and for over 12 years, Robbin juggled a full-time corporate career while being a mom and wife, prior to becoming a Parenting Coach.  In her corporate career, Robbin has a background in marketing and public relations, training, and event planning. She understands firsthand how many moms struggle to balance work and family.

 

It’s because of her struggles as a parent that she found the world of peaceful parenting and has dedicated her life to teaching parents how to build a strong family, so their kids thrive. 

Robbin’s work focuses on building and strengthening the parent child relationship so that children grow up with resilience, confidence and strong emotional intelligence.  She works with parents to help them understand their own emotions and frustrations in parenting, so they can help build their children’s sense of self without losing themselves in the process!

 

In October of 2018 Robbin released her first book, “The Yelling Cure – How stress less and get your kids to cooperate without threats & punishments.” Her book is being read by parents all over the world 1000,000 copies sold to date.

 

Robbin divides her time working with her clients, speaking at events and spending time with her two boys and husband.  You can usually find her at a hockey rink or sports field cheering on her boys.  Most importantly, Robbin has changed the way she parents and connects with her sons and is dedicated to helping parents find the same joy, connection and cooperation in their families.

 

www.yellingcurebook.com

Robbin@parentingforconnection.com

www.parentingforconnection.com

www.facebook.com/parenting4connection

www.instagram.com/robbinmcmanne_parentcoach

 

From the Podcast:

Look at your child’s behaviour as secondary.  Focus on what’s driving the behaviour first. 

 

Follow these steps:

  1. go to your child and call out the behaviour. Say:

“wow you must be really angry right now”

“I know you're feeling really disappointed right now” 

“I can see that my answer makes you very angry”

“it looks like you have lots of energy!”

  1. Validate what they are feeling and reiterate why you are holding this boundary. Say:

“I know you're angry/upset/disappointed, but this is something that just isn't allowed”

“it looks like you really want to bounce the ball but we can’t do that in the house”

“I know you're upset I know you're disappointed and I bet that feels really hard. Right?  - for more suggestions on Empathy, see episode 5 of my podcast “Level up your parenting using empathy.”

Pro tip:  you know I want you to really make sure that this is a battle that you're willing to pick.  If you are holding a boundary, make sure this is a hard no that won’t change to a yes just because they wore you down!  

  1. Find solutions together. Say:

“I know this doesn’t feel fair, how can we work this out?”

“it looks like you really want to bounce that ball, lets go outside together to do it!”

“I bet we can find some really fun things to do outside instead!”

 

  1. Child beyond solutions = natural consequences. maybe your child is beyond solutions and maybe they continue to dig into the behaviour or go back to it after you have sorted it out (or thought you did).  

Son:  “I want some hot chocolate!”

Mom:  “Was that a question?”

Son:  “Get it for me!”

Mom:  “would you like to ask me nicely?”

Son: “NO!”

Mom: “well I know you really want hot chocolate, but I won't be able to give it to you unless you can speak to me in a polite way.  In our family we don't talk to each other that way; we use manners.  Can you ask me again?”

Son: “NO!  I want it now!!”

Mom:  “Ok, well, it looks like you don’t want to talk to me in a polite way so when you are ready, I’ll make you the hot chocolate.  Come get me when you are ready.”

 

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection  With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism.  We have too much of that!  I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be.  My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

 

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

 

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

 

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve, but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

Sep 10, 2019
POF 08: 8 Digital Life Skills For Youth
50:03

I’m so happy to have my friend and fellow mom, Angela Crocker.   On this episode, Angela and I talk about her newest book, Digital Life Skills for Youth.  Kids age 11-18 have more access to technology than any other generation. We talk about what parents can do to build healthy boundaries and habits around technology.  She shares what danger signs to look out for and when kids should have access.

What about the more ‘diabolical’ world of social media and apps?  Angela gives us a look inside some “Tricky Tactics” where kids can hide content from their parents.

You will learn how to begin navigating the digital world for your kids, even if you don’t know where to start!

About Angela Crocker

Angela Crocker has been called the Ann Landers of digital living, making sense of the online life for thousands of digital citizens. Her expertise includes education technology, digital parenting, online communities, digital decluttering, content planning, and more. Angela works as an author, speaker and educator to help individuals, schools, and businesses navigate the digital life. She is the author of six books including Digital Life Skills for Youth, Declutter Your Data and The Content Planner. To learn more about the book featured on this episode, go to https://angelacrocker.com/digital_life_skills_for_youth/

 

From the Podcast:

As discussed in the podcast, here is an excerpt from Angela’s book, Digital Life Skills for Youth

“To help parents figure out a healthy amount of screen time, I recommend looking at each youth’s life overall.  Think about one specific youth and consider these questions:

  • Is the youth getting an adequate amount (approximately nine hours) of uninterrupted sleep most nights?
  • Does the youth have social connections to peers including some close relationships (best friends)?
  • Does the youth get an hour or more of exercise each day?
  • Is the youth meeting their responsibilities around the home and at school?  Are chores done and homework completed?
  • Is the youth attending school on time and prepared for class regularly?
  • Is the youth participating in family meals and social occasions?
  • Is the youth completing daily hygiene routines? Showers? Flossing?

If the answer is yes to most of these questions, then whatever time the youth has time left over could, in my opinion, be spent on activities they choose whether online or offline.”

Overall, Angela recommends keeping the lines of communication open with your child(ren). Make sure you talk to them about security, appropriate pictures, privacy, their digital footprint and more.

Lastly, give yourself a break!  This topic is new and complicated and sometimes we get it wrong. It’s ok to make mistakes; this is an ever-evolving world and it new to so many of us! 

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection  With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism.  We have too much of that! I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. 

If you want to get my book, The Yelling Cure, and other resources I offer, Please go to www.yellingcurebook.com

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast app on your mobile device.

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve, but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

 

Sep 03, 2019
POF07: Parenting Right From The Start With Dr. Vanessa Lapointe
43:40

Dr. Vanessa and I discuss her newest book, “Parenting Right From the Start; Laying a Healthy Foundation in the Baby and Toddler years.”  In the podcast, we talk about what it means to grow yourself up before you can grow your kids up, what it means to have “swagger” and how being “large and in charge” helps your kids be more independent.  With the new school year upon us, Dr. Vanessa talks about how to orchestrate an “artful introduction” to your child’s new teacher or caregiver. Dr. Vanessa is fun, funny and full of meaningful, common sense knowledge and leaves you hanging on her every word!

About Dr. Vanessa Lapointe

Dr. Vanessa Lapointe is an author, parenting expert, and registered psychologist (British Columbia #1856) who has been supporting families and children for more than fifteen years. Author of Discipline without Damage: How to get your kids to behave without messing them up and Parenting Right From The Start: Laying a Healthy Foundation in the Baby and Toddler years, regularly invited media guest and contributor, educator and speaker, a Huffington Post Parent blogger, and a consultant to research projects and various organizations promoting emotional health and development,

Dr. Vanessa is known for bringing a sense of nurturing understanding and humanity to all of her work. She presently works in private practice and has previous experience in a variety of settings, including the British Columbia Ministry of Children and Family Development and the school system.

Dr. Vanessa’s passion is in walking alongside parents, teachers, care providers, and other big people to really see the world through the child’s eyes. She believes that if we can do this, we are beautifully positioned to grow up our children in the best possible way. As a mother to 2 growing children, Dr. Vanessa strives not only professionally, but also personally, to view the world through the child’s eyes.

If you are interested in pre-ordering Dr. Vanessa’s book, Parenting Right From The Start: Laying a Healthy Foundation in the Baby and Toddler years, you can order HERE

Web: www.drvanessalapointe.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drvanessalapointe

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.vanessalapointe/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/drvlapointe

Email: team@drvanessalapointe.com

Six Parenting Principles from Dr Vanessa Lapointe

  1.   No challenge, no growth. Embrace the mess.

Nobody ever said that growing up was meant to be an easy peasy walk in the park with no difficulty. In fact, it is in the mess of it that growth blossoms. It has to be difficult; it has to erupt; it has to feel immovable … and then, magic happens. The human mind and heart come alive in the face of challenge. It is here that adaptation is fostered and resilience is championed. Furthermore, you cannot truly know the up of it if you have not fully lived the down of it. Celebrate the peaks and the valleys. Take heart in the perceived struggle for that is where the path to greatness begins. No challenge, no growth.

  1.     Grow you, grow them.

There is nothing quite like loving and growing a child to absolutely bring you to your knees as a parent. Often it is in the act of raising our young that a light is definitively shone on the ungrown parts of ourselves. It seems that nobody can set us off or trigger us like our own children can. And yet, when the origins of these triggers are honestly explored, it becomes quickly apparent that it isn’t actually our children that are the cause of our upset. It is the ungrown parts of ourselves that we have brought forward with us from our own pasts, our own childhoods. In becoming a parent perhaps the greatest gift you will receive is the invitation of growing yourself. Grow you so that you can grow them.

  1.   Find your village.

For as long as we have existed, humans have been tribal in nature. We are meant to live and grow and thrive in villages. Within community, there exists structures and relationships to support all of the members in their continued growth and development. Compared to the rich communal existence of our ancestors, parents today raise their children in relative isolation. And this makes things so much more challenging. With the erosion of our naturally existing villages, it is upon us to back-door the creation of a community within which to raise our young. You were never meant to go this alone. Find your village.

4. Know where to set the bar.

To really be full of compassionate guidance for your child, it is essential that you know where to set the bar. The goal always is to set the bar where the child can jump. Too high and the child is constantly faced with failure, conflict, and shame. Too low and the child never gets to experience their own capacity for conquering life. They are disabled by being enabled. In both cases, the child has to reject your guidance as a big person who doesn’t really get him. And because you don’t get him, you are no longer trusted to be decisively in the lead. Rather than just let himself blow about in the wind, your child will be forced to be in the lead of himself. And that is a devastating place from which a child will never be able to fully emerge into his true potential. So know where to set the bar.

Educate yourself about development, temperament, and attachment. Advocate for your unique, individual child at home and in community from this knowing place.

  1.   Slow down.

Growth is a spectacular thing. It is ordained by the natural order of things to occur provided the appropriate conditions are created to foster it. One of those conditions is time. Development occurs on its own timeline and it cannot be rushed. Often times parents are misled into believing that rushing development leads to earlier and thus better outcomes and opportunities. But that is simply not the case. Rushed development can occasionally take on the early façade of a desired outcome. But it will be realized over time that this façade had no depth or staying power because it did not honor the inherent trajectory of growth set forth for your unique little child. So pave the way, remove impediments, and champion your child’s needs. But never rush childhood. Surrender to the natural power of growth.

  1.     Know that you are enough.

Growing up a little human can feel utterly overwhelming at times. And the parenting industry hasn’t actually served us well in this respect. Perhaps never more than now have parents painstakingly questioned their own capacity for being exactly what their child needs. The incredible amount of highly accessible information available to modern parents seems to have thrust them into self-doubt rather than promoting empowerment. Too often I see parents who give their innate know-how and power to raise their children brilliantly away to so-called experts. It is my view that nobody is the expert on a child in the way that the parent is. Your gut, your intuition, your sense of your child’s being are unlike anything anybody else can lay claim to. Your child needs you to own this. You are enough. You were born for this. You have it in you to give.

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection  With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism. We have too much of that!  I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

Aug 26, 2019
POF06: Women’s work and How Dropping the Ball is OK!
31:32

I’m so happy to have my friend, fellow mom, and one of the newest experts on Cityline, Lindsay Whisen, on this episode. Lindsay and I share a passion for helping people in difficult areas of their lives. Her company serves people by freeing them from energetically draining clutter and inefficiency. In our conversation we talk about the parallels of what we do, in that, both organizing and parenting have always been considered ‘women’s work’. In this day and age, many moms work and still have all the responsibilities at home. The problem? This is work that is expected of women, work that women ‘should’ know how to do (without any training, I might add), and is consistently undervalued. Join us for our discussion into this area and find some help and support for your ‘cluttered life’. 

About Lindsay Whisen

Lindsay is the founder and CEO of Ease Up - The Organizing Experts - a 5-year-old, award-winning company that provides teams of hands-on organizers for people suffering from clutter or disorganization - ultimately their work saves people from wasting time, energy and sanity.

Her passion for Ease Up runs deep as she considers it a feminist endeavor and because she knows first-hand the positive and powerful connection that being organized has with mental health.

Lindsay is passionate about the power of education, social justice, mental health awareness and the energy that is unleashed through being organized. 

Lindsay has a "fortune 500 family". She is grateful to be a parent of 2 good kids (ages 7 and 4) and she is tremendously proud of her marriage with Graham

Web: easeup.ca

Facebook: www.facebook.com/easeuporganizing/

Instagram: @easeuporganizing @lindsaywhisen

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lindsaywhisen/

Twitter:

Email: lindsay@easeup.ca

Text: 1-833-EaseUp1

Office: 1-833-EaseUp1

 

From the Podcast:

Check out Lindsay’s book recommendation: “Drop The Ball” by Tiffany Dufu

How many “French Onion Soup Bowls” do you have in your home?

Look at your space; go from room to room and look at all the ‘stuff’ you are storing. How much of it do you use and really need?

Action steps:

1) Have a bag or box in each closet, and as you notice clothes you/your kids don’t wear, clothes that don’t fit anymore and are worn out, put them in the box. You are doing a little each day so the task isn’t overwhelming. Once the box is full, you can review and give the things you really want to part with away.

2) set yourself up with a plan to do one room a week and remove those things you don’t use or need. Ask yourself, “Am I just storing this, or can I let it go?”

Guilt about giving things away?

Some people feel bad because of the money they have spent but reframing the way you look at it will help. Giving something away gives it a new life, blesses someone with something they need, and stops it from going to the landfill.

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism. We have too much of that! I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way!

Thank You!!

Aug 19, 2019
POF05: Level Up Your Parenting Using Empathy
16:46

In this episode, I talk about what empathy really is and how to use it in your parenting.  Use empathy when you have to say “no”, how to use it when your child is too young to name their emotions and how to use empathy for yourself!

Robbin is a Certified Parent Coach, author and speaker.  She works with parents from all over the world to help them build more connection and find more joy and cooperation to their parenting.

Robbin is a former ‘Angry Mom’ and for over 12 years, Robbin juggled a full-time corporate career while being a mom and wife, prior to becoming a Parenting Coach.  In her corporate career, Robbin has a background in marketing and public relations, training, and event planning. She understands firsthand how many moms struggle to balance work and family.

It’s because of her struggles as a parent that she found the world of peaceful parenting and has dedicated her life to teaching parents how to build a strong family, so their kids thrive. 

Robbin’s work focuses on building and strengthening the parent-child relationship so that children grow up with resilience, confidence and strong emotional intelligence.  She works with parents to help them understand their own emotions and frustrations in parenting, so they can help build their children’s sense of self without losing themselves in the process!

In October of 2018, Robbin released her first book, “The Yelling Cure – How to stress less and get your kids to cooperate without threats & punishments.” Her book is being read by parents all over the world 1000,000 copies sold to date.

Robbin divides her time working with her clients, speaking at events and spending time with her two boys and husband.  You can usually find her at a hockey rink or sports field cheering on her boys.  Most importantly, Robbin has changed the way she parents and connects with her sons and is dedicated to helping parents find the same joy, connection and cooperation in their families.

Robbin@parentingforconnection.com

www.parentingforconnection.com

www.facebook.com/parenting4connection

www.instagram.com/robbinmcmanne_parentcoach

 

Formula for Empathy:

Acknowledge/validate what they are feeling

  • BECAUSE = 2-3 reasons why they might feel that way


Say this:

I get why you are feeling disappointed because

  1. you wanted to stay longer,
  2. you don’t want to go home and
  3. you don’t want the fun to end.

Right?

If got it right, your child will say “yeah!”


Words of Empathy

It’s ok to be sad – I know you are sad and it’s ok to cry

I’ll stay with you until you feel better

This is really hard for you – I can see how hard this is for you

I’m here with you – I’ll stay with you

Tell me about it – tell me more

I hear you

That was really scary, sad, etc.

I will help you work it out

It doesn't feel fair


Emotion words from www.groktheworld.com:

http://www.groktheworld.com/sites/default/files/product-upload-files/Feelings%20Inventory_0.pdf


Don’t forget that empathy is also for YOU!!!


Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to

continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection

With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism.  We have too much of that! I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.


Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!


Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day.

Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others

find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes

a long way! Thank You!!

Aug 12, 2019
POF04: Jedi Mind Tricks For Parents
31:25

Want to add some new superpowers into your parenting?  My conversation with Adele Anderson, Certified Natural Medical Practitioner and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) Coach and Trainer will help you to understand how our emotions are attached to our physiology and how we can use that knowledge to get more cooperation from our kids! 

About Adele Anderson DCH MNLP Coach

Graduate: Vancouver Academy Homeopathy

Anatomy & Physiology for Alternative Practitioners

Trainer: Neuro-Linguistics & New Code practitioner

Coach

At 27 I found myself trapped upside-down, drowning in water in a crashed plane. As my life flashed before my eyes, I knew without a doubt, I was out of breath and out of time. That life experience forever changed my perception and beliefs; about the power of the mind; and that choice exists even in life’s most dire circumstances.

Since that fateful day, I have made it my life mission. To understand the mind, conscious choice and empowerment.

For 20+ years I have practiced Natural Medicine, Neuroscience: Neuro-Linguistics programming and now New Code. I work with ages 4-80; 1:1 and with groups. Or study online: communication as a Superpower

Web: https://www.lifecoachadele.com 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Iamyourdestinycoach  Instagram: @adelemanderson 

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adeleandersondch

Podcast: Mind Your Freedom 

Twitter: https://twitter.com/NlpAdele 

Email: yes@lifecoachadele.com 

Text: 604-885-8236 

Office: 604-885-0562

 

From the Podcast:

 

Personal trance words 

Ask your child to describe three things they love to do and listen/write down the words they use to describe them.  You will hear some of the same words being used.  These words bypass the conscious thinking words.  If you want to make something seem fun that they don't normally enjoy; use those words because this is how they describe fun activities.

Magic words

Stimulate a person’s imagination.  “I don’t have to tell you because you already know” which bypasses the resistant critical thinking part of brain.  Use words that activate their senses; (think of a lemon) or move their mind through time: before, beyond, during & after.

  • “You would be surprised if…”
  • “I know you want to bee seen as a kid who is (responsible, athletic, liked) 
  • “You probably already know what time I want you home tonight”

 

Command words are task or operational words describe, explain, compare

  • Now, (Stop)
  • Use the child’s first and middle name
  • “I really don’t know what you want me to do when you say (shut up).  Imagine how things would change/what would happen if you didn’t say that to your mom?  OR “imagine what life would be like if we didn’t have these kinds of conversations”
  • “I don’t know” – drops your child’s resistance
  • Adding “Really” is even stronger than “I don’t know” – “I really don’t know”
  • Add because, also a power word, and link it to something important to them.  
    • “Imagine what it would be like to have harmony in our home because I know how much you love it when we are all happy and getting along”
  • I don’t want to do my homework.  When talking to your child, try not to use “Don’t.”  Instead, use
    • “imagine what school would be like if you studied for the exam and how easy it would be.  I know you want to be seen as a kid who excels.”

 

Power words and phrases 

Raise your words, not your voice ~ RUMI

  • Strength comes in building patterns (combinations) of all categories. 
  • And think, 3 little words phrases
  • The formula for this pattern is to use:  adverbs and adjectives, + space and time+  cause and effect
  • Do it now!
  • Not before dinner
  • Because I asked 
  • Examples of words to use are: naturally easily, unlimited, aware, realize, experience, before, after, expand, beyond, and, because  - example: most easily, naturally unlimited, extremely natural, always easy, 

 

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection  With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism.  We have too much of that! I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

 

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

 

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

 

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

 

Aug 05, 2019
POF03: How Setting Intentions For Yourself And Your Child Can Have A Positive Effect On Both Your Actions And Your Child’s
29:41

In this episode, I talk about how to set intentions and how setting intentions can change your thoughts, mindset and actions. Setting intentions holds power because your mindset holds incredible power over your thoughts and actions. 

Robbin is a Certified Parent Coach, author and speaker. She works with parents from all over the world to help them build more connection and find more joy and cooperation to their parenting. Robbin is a former ‘Angry Mom’ and for over 12 years, Robbin juggled a full-time corporate career while being a mom and wife, prior to becoming a Parenting Coach. In her corporate career, Robbin has a background in marketing and public relations, training, and event planning. She understands firsthand how many moms struggle to balance work and family. 

It’s because of her struggles as a parent that she found the world of peaceful parenting and has dedicated her life to teaching parents how to build a strong family, so their kids thrive. Robbin’s work focuses on building and strengthening the parent-child relationship so that children grow up with resilience, confidence and strong emotional intelligence. She works with parents to help them understand their own emotions and frustrations in parenting, so they can help build their children’s sense of self without losing themselves in the process! 

In October of 2018, Robbin released her first book, “The Yelling Cure – How to stress less and get your kids to cooperate without threats & punishments.” Her book is being read by parents all over the world 1000,000 copies sold to date. 

Robbin divides her time working with her clients, speaking at events and spending time with her two boys and husband. You can usually find her at a hockey rink or sports field cheering on her boys. Most importantly, Robbin has changed the way she parents and connects with her sons and is dedicated to helping parents find the same joy, connection and cooperation in their families. 

Robbin@parentingforconnection.com www.parentingforconnection.com www.facebook.com/parenting4connection www.instagram.com/robbinmcmanne_parentcoach 

From the Podcast: 

  1. What intentions would you like to embody in your way of parenting? 
  2. What would your family look like if you had a magic wand and could transform the relationships in your family? Paint yourself a vivid and detailed description. One that you can come back to when things are stressful. 
  1. Set a clear and attainable intention every day 
  2. Today I will:__________ 
  3. Accept my child’s struggle to wake up in the morning ii. Talk less and listen more iii. choose to listen intently to my child 
  4. Implementation Intentions by Peter Gollwitzer = When X happens, I will engage in Y 
  5. Use these for yourself and your kids. 
  6. Example for you: When my son doesn’t nap, I’ll take him for a walk and not let it ruin my day ii. Example for your child: When I feel overwhelmed, I’ll ask for help 

Thanks for listening! It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism. We have too much of that! I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. 

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below! 

Subscribe to the podcast If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device. 

Leave a review I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!! 

Jul 29, 2019
POF02: Top 3 Parenting Questions ANSWERED
25:27

I’ll walk you through how you can tackle the three most common questions I get asked so you can have more cooperation and peace in your home! First, I talk about meltdowns and how to understand them and find out what’s going on with your child even if they are too young to express themselves. I talk about the secret to getting your kids to listen to you the FIRST time!! The final question I answer is how to get more respect from your kids.

Robbin is a Certified Parent Coach, author, and speaker. She works with parents from all over the world to help them build more connection and find more joy and cooperation to their parenting.

Robbin is a former ‘Angry Mom’ and for over 12 years, Robbin juggled a full-time corporate career while being a mom and wife, prior to becoming a Parenting Coach. In her corporate career, Robbin has a background in marketing and public relations, training, and event planning. She understands firsthand how many moms struggle to balance work and family.

It’s because of her struggles as a parent that she found the world of peaceful parenting and has dedicated her life to teaching parents how to build a strong family, so their kids thrive.

Robbin’s work focuses on building and strengthening the parent-child relationship so that children grow up with resilience, confidence and strong emotional intelligence. She works with parents to help them understand their own emotions and frustrations in parenting, so they can help build their children’s sense of self without losing themselves in the process!

In October of 2018 Robbin released her first book, “The Yelling Cure – How stress less and get your kids to cooperate without threats & punishments.” Her book is being read by parents all over the world 1000,000 copies sold to date.

Robbin divides her time working with her clients, speaking at events and spending time with her two boys and husband. You can usually find her at a hockey rink or sports field cheering on her boys. Most importantly, Robbin has changed the way she parents and connects with her sons and is dedicated to helping parents find the same joy, connection and cooperation in their families.

Robbin@parentingforconnection.com www.parentingforconnection.com www.facebook.com/parenting4connection www.instagram.com/robbinmcmanne_parentcoach

From the Podcast:

Question #1 Understanding meltdown
When kids are too young to express themselves and name their emotions follow these steps:

1. Accept your child has big emotions

  1. Name what your child must be feeling

  2. Give them empathy – feeling things you can’t name is really hard and can feel scary for a child

  3. Accept again

  4. You need to know what your emotions are as well. Follow this link to get your list of feelings

    from groktheworld.com http://www.groktheworld.com/feelings-needs-body-sensations-lists

Question #2 steps to getting your kids to listen

  1. Notice where you are in relationship to your child when you ask them to do something

  2. Go to them and connect with them – touch them on the arm or back to take them into the here

    and now.

  3. Make your request once you have their attention

  4. Take them

  5. Give them any help they need

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to www.facebook.com/parenting4connection

With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgment or criticism. We have too much of that! I honor each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast

app on your mobile device.

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

Jul 22, 2019
POF01: Welcome to Parenting Our Future!
36:11

In my podcast, my intention is to create a safe place for anyone listening. This is for parents who are struggling, parents who are just looking for some new ways. This podcast is for you if you've had a good day, if you've had a bad day, if you’ve been struggling for a week or years! This is for you if you have one child or many, young children or adult children (grandparents welcome!!)

In this episode I share my journey into motherhood and how it shook me so hard I lost myself and the vision of the mother I thought I would be. In my deepest despair, I found a way out through peaceful parenting. Not only did I find a way to connect with my kids and get more cooperation and connection, I became much more confident mom and found my way back to myself.

Because I’m so passionate about the practice of Peaceful Parenting, I want to share with you what it’s all about and how it can make a difference for you as well!

Robbin is a Certified Parent Coach, author and speaker. She works with parents from all over the world to help them build more connection and find more joy and cooperation to their parenting.

Robbin is a former ‘Angry Mom’ and for over 12 years, Robbin juggled a full-time corporate career while being mom and wife, prior to becoming a Parenting Coach. In her corporate career, Robbin has a background in marketing and public relations, training, and event planning. She understands firsthand how many moms struggle to balance work and family.

It’s because of her struggles as a parent that she found the world of peaceful parenting and has dedicated her life to teaching parents how to build a strong family, so their kids thrive.

Robbin’s work focuses on building and strengthening the parent child relationship so that children grow up with resilience, confidence and strong emotional intelligence. She works with parents to help them understand their own emotions and frustrations in parenting, so they can help build their children’s sense of self without losing themselves in the process!

In October of 2018 Robbin released her first book, “The Yelling Cure – How stress less and get your kids to cooperate without threats & punishments.” Her book is being read by parents all over the world 1000,000 copies sold to date.

Robbin divides her time working with her clients, speaking at events and spending time with her two boys and husband. You can usually find her at a hockey rink or sports field cheering on her boys. Most importantly, Robbin has changed the way she parents and connects with her sons and is dedicated to helping parents find the same joy, connection and cooperation in their families.

www.instagram.com/robbinmcmanne_parentcoach

From the Podcast:

Active Compassionate Listening:

  1. Listen Intently: What is said in words and non-verbally – put your phone down, no distractions all attention on the person speaking

  2. Listen without judgement: We go through our days with judgement filters – so try to lift those filters so you can really hear the other person. Listen for understanding, not to judge or respond

  3. Listen without interruption: Most of the time when we interrupt, it can come from a good place of wanting to share. We have lots of thoughts when someone is talking but try to make a conscious effort to listen and keep quiet without interrupting.

  4. Listen without comparing: your mind wants to actively go to how you compare but it takes you out of listening

PROTIP- repeat back what you heard!

Thanks for listening!

It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you would like to continue the conversation with me, head on over to

With this podcast, my intention is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism. We have too much of that! I honour each parent and their path toward becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting. If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.

Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!

Subscribe to the podcast

If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe on the podcast app on your mobile device.

Leave a review

I appreciate every bit of feedback to make this a value-adding part of your day. Ratings and reviews from listeners not only help me improve but also help others find me in their podcast app. If you have a minute, an honest review on iTunes goes a long way! Thank You!!

Jul 15, 2019