The Richard Nicholls Podcast - Motivate Yourself

By Richard Nicholls

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The UK's most popular personal development podcast series. Brought to you by Richard Nicholls. To motivate, inspire and help you to be the best you can be.

Episode Date
Episode 164: Wooden Legs & Excuses
16:26
<p>Have you ever met someone with a wooden leg? Not a real wooden leg, but a metaphorical one? <br />In the 60’s, a psychiatrist called Eric Berne, turned some common problematic psychological processes into what he called “Games People Play” One of which he called the wooden leg game.</p> <p>Imagine a man with a wooden leg who has used it as an explanation for why his life is unfulfilled all of his life, he would often say “If it wasn’t for this wooden leg, I could have been an athlete.” Or when he complains that he’s unemployed he says “What do you expect from a guy with one leg?”</p> <p>The wooden leg game can hold us back from enjoying life and feeling fulfilled, and there are many things that can be your wooden leg. People will say...</p> <p>Subscribe to the newsletter for free extra episodes and hypnosis downloads. <br /> <a href="https://www.motivateyourself.co.uk/newsletter>"> https://www.motivateyourself.co.uk/newsletter</a></p> <p>Social Media Links <br />Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/richardnicholls">https://twitter.com/richardnicholls</a> <br />Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal/">https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal</a> <br />Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast/">https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast</a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/Kjr8VVNcFpM" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Dec 01, 2018
Episode 163: Dealing With Depression
24:50
<p>Depression is a huge topic. It’s a big problem in the 21st Century and to try and understand it by listening to a single podcast episode probably isn’t going to be enough. <br />Even 4 years at medical school wouldn’t do that. <br />But I hope that with today’s episode I can help you to gain a bit of extra insight into it and I encourage you to read up on it if it’s something that you feel you need to understand more about.</p> <p>Subscribe to the newsletter for free extra episodes and hypnosis downloads. <br /> <a href="https://www.motivateyourself.co.uk/newsletter>"> https://www.motivateyourself.co.uk/newsletter</a></p> <p>Social Media Links <br />Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/richardnicholls">https://twitter.com/richardnicholls</a> <br />Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal/">https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal</a> <br />Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast/">https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast</a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/CXSkTxViFw8" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Nov 01, 2018
Episode 162: Don’t Let Your Career Define You
14:01
<p>Imagine you're invited to a friend’s house for a party and you find yourself chatting to a total stranger. If they were to say to you "So, what do you do?" What's the first thing that pops into your mind? <br />Go on, what do you do? Do you swim? do you play cricket? Do you party? <br />Of course, we all know that what they really mean is "What do you do for a living?" It may well be simply small talk just to get a conversation going but what someone does for a living is the usually the first place people tend to go when learning about someone else. And I think it's worth questioning whether that’s appropriate, because there's more to us than our job.</p> <p>Nominate the podcast in the 13th Annual Podcast Awards <a href="https://www.podcastawards.com/">https://www.podcastawards.com</a></p> <p>Social Media Links <br />Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/richardnicholls">https://twitter.com/richardnicholls</a> <br />Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal/">https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal</a> <br />Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast/">https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast</a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/exX-4Nx60ec" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Oct 01, 2018
Episode 161: The Need To Belong
16:14
<p>Many people feel a need to be unique, to be different from everyone else but that shouldn’t be at the expense of our sense of belonging. If we’re missing belongingness in our life then we can often feel as if we’re insignificant, unimportant and may as well crawl under a rock to die. Sure, be different, you’re life is your own, and any self esteem boost you get from your uniqueness can be used to help you recognise that actually, we’re all different, we’re all unique.</p> <p>Nominate the podcast in the 13th Annual Podcast Awards <a href="https://www.podcastawards.com/">https://www.podcastawards.com</a></p> <p>Social Media Links <br />Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/richardnicholls">https://twitter.com/richardnicholls</a> <br />Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal/">https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal</a> <br />Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast/">https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast</a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/5Y6rWAuqpWc" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Sep 01, 2018
Episode 160: Anything Is Better Than Nothing
14:27
<p>Is there something you want to achieve that you know is going to take a while? Maybe something that has many steps, such as getting fitter or writing a dissertation? <br />If so then you need to be aware that doing anything that brings you closer to the end result is better than doing nothing at all. That might seem obvious, but it’s not uncommon for people to be really hard on ourselves for not putting in maximum effort.</p> <p>Nominate the podcast in the 13th Annual Podcast Awards <a href="https://www.podcastawards.com/">https://www.podcastawards.com</a></p> <p>Social Media Links <br />Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/richardnicholls">https://twitter.com/richardnicholls</a> <br />Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal/">https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal</a> <br />Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast/">https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast</a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/ZRvmBzpKYQc" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Aug 01, 2018
Episode 159: Resilience
19:23
<p>Despite their setbacks and failures some people seem to have the ability to brush things off and bounce back almost stronger than before, they seem to have a grit and determination not to let bad experiences affect them. Is this something than can be learned?</p> <p>Nominate the podcast in the 13th Annual Podcast Awards <a href="https://www.podcastawards.com/">https://www.podcastawards.com</a></p> <p>Social Media Links <br />Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/richardnicholls">https://twitter.com/richardnicholls</a> <br />Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal/">https://www.instagram.com/richardnichollsreal</a> <br />Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast/">https://www.facebook.com/MotivateYourselfPodcast</a></p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/OvY3PZC7Hi0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jul 01, 2018
Episode 158: Guilt And Shame
15:11
<p>If we’ve hurt someone then I think it’s probably healthy to feel bad about it, to wish that we’d behaved differently and to want to make amends. <br />But what isn’t healthy is continually beating yourself up over it or to think of yourself as a bad person because of what happened. Feeling bad because you hurt someone is guilt. But feeling as if you’re a bad person is shame, and they’re a bit different. <br />Guilt you can do something with, you can learn from it. You can apologise, make amends and move on. But shame? There’s not really anywhere to go with that, and I think it’s important that we recognise that good people can do bad things, just like bad people can do good things.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/GE2RQRCG_2k" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jun 01, 2018
Episode 157: Self-Worth and Anxiety
14:28
Did you know that if you're physically tired then you will estimate hills as steeper than they actually are? And that a place in the distance is further away? But did you also know that it's not just our physical resources that influence our perception of the world?<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/hv-gNKXU9hM" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
May 01, 2018
Episode 156: What We Fight, We Invite
14:42
There’s an annoying quirk to our psychology that means we can easily be drawn towards the exact thing that we’re trying to avoid, as the old saying goes 'be careful what you look for, because you just might find it.' Because the alternative means that you might have made yourself part of the problem, rather than the solution.<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/pFOHK9VfMi8" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Apr 01, 2018
Episode 155: Options & Decisions
14:38
<p>Making decisions can be hard, and not just with the big things in life. <br />Sometimes even things that should be insignificant in the grand scheme of things can paralyse us. So how do we get around it? <br />Todays episode is about just that. Getting a better perspective on these things and even the bigger ones too.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/kMb__-zX7W0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Mar 01, 2018
Episode 154: What Makes A Good Relationship?
15:11
<p>Although I’m not a relationship coach or a couple therapist a lot of clients will come to one to one therapy and discuss their relationships, with many of them saying things such as “I don’t know what a real relationship is supposed to feel like!” <br />I think that in a society that looks at so many things in life as disposable it can be very hard to think of something in your life as permanent, and may even be a bit scary for a lot of people. Which is why so many clients say to me that they feel trapped when they’re in a relationship yet they feel lonely and insignificant when they’re not.</p> <p>Now, there is a problem with putting too much importance on a relationship when you’re single, because there are and always will be happy single people. You don't NEED a permanent romantic partner to be happy in life, all the research has shown that there isn’t enough of an association between happiness levels and relationship status for it to be a significant correlation. <br />A relationship may well be very nice, but if you think that settling down and getting married is the ONLY way to be happy then you could get quite disappointed. <br />If a relationship is your only expected source of happiness then it could get quite unhealthy. I think that a strong relationship is built not on 2 people who CAN’T live without each other, but 2 people who don’t want to HAVE to live without each other. As with so many things it all comes down to a proper balance of the 2. <br />The issue with being human though, is that we are primed to think about the things we fear the most, it’s kept us safe for many millions of years, and isn’t easy to ignore. So if one of your biggest fears is that your partner doesn’t love you then that’s what you’ll look for. As the famous phrase goes “Be careful what you look for, because you just might find it.” <br />This isn’t necessarily because evidence that your partner doesn’t love you is actually there, but because whilst looking for it you find evidence of something else. Evidence that your partner is sleepy, evidence that they’ve had a bad day, evidence that they have a weird attitude towards affection because they were never hugged as a child.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/2pUVEG5d8_c" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Feb 01, 2018
Episode 153: The Gratitude Attitude
15:31
<p>I was asked in an interview recently that if I had to choose one thing, what would I say is the most effective way of boosting happiness? <br />In order to answer it I needed to think about all the concepts and exercises that I wrote about in my book to see if there was a common ingredient or theme. What I found is that pretty much everything I wrote about needed a foundation of appreciation, of gratitude in order for them to be of any help.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/MkKeM8YkD-E" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jan 15, 2018
Episode 152: 15 Minutes To Happiness
15:11
<p>Have a think about the following question for a moment. </p> <p>“Please imagine a ladder with steps numbered from zero at the bottom to 10 at the top. Suppose we say that the top of the ladder represents the best possible life for you, and the bottom of the ladder represents the worst possible life for you. On which step of the ladder would you say you personally feel you stand at this time, assuming that the higher the step the better you feel about your life, and the lower the step the worse you feel about it? Which step comes closest to the way you feel?”</p> <p>This question is asked once per year by Gallup, the famous poll company. They ask a thousand people in each of around 150 countries from around the world to work out how happy each country is on average. <br />Gallup don’t just ask this one question though, there are many more. They ask about their relationship status, how many children they have, how many friends they have. They find out how much time people spend driving to work and whether or not they mow their own lawn or get the kid down the road to do it for a fiver. <br />There are many other organisations that undertake similar research and if you take all of the data from all of these different sources and stick them into a computer you can look for correlations, so we can see what influences us for the better and what influences us for the worse. It makes some very interesting reading and some of it genuinely surprising.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/Xe66j5lw6-w" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jan 01, 2018
Episode 151: The Dangers Of Manning Up
13:32
<p>When someone says Be a man, what do you think of? <br />Act tough? <br />Don’t cry? <br />Or do you think manning up means to take responsibility for your emotions or accept mistakes and move on? <br />The idea of “Manning Up” seems to mean something different to everyone. YouTube channel Cut created some word association videos once and one of the phrases they asked a group of men to respond to was Be A Man, and it was really quite interesting to see the variances. They edited it together so that the youngest were at the beginning of the video and the eldest at the end, starting with 5 year olds and ended at aged 50. <br />The reason this was so interesting to me is because the younger someone was the more similar their responses were. Most of the under 30’s associated being a man with being tough and strong, especially the youngsters. <br />It wasn’t until they were in their 30’s that they seemed to find their own voice and the closer they got to 50 the more they saw Be A Man as a cliche that shouldn't have any relevance and instead associated manliness with honesty, embracing emotions or trusting themselves and walking their own path. <br />It reminded me of something that Piers Morgan said during mental health awareness week. It was in response to an article that said that 2 thirds of British adults have experienced mental health problems, which is true but that doesn’t mean that 34 million people are suffering with mental illness all at the same time which the headlines often exaggerate it to, so as to get your attention. But the thing is, rather than acknowledge it as click bait and start a sensible discussion, Piers Morgan made the mistake of saying “What utter nonsense, Man Up Britain” and it started a flurry of almost 2000 replies that gave quite an insight into what people think about mental health.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/nN_gHuF07u8" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Dec 01, 2017
Episode 150: Beating The Winter Blues
13:41
<p>It might sound daft to some people but gloomy weather does have an impact on our mental health. If its grey on the outside we can easily slip into a grey on the inside feeling, which leads to behaviour that might makes things worse, hiding away from everyone and refusing to leave the so called comforts of home. <br />Here are my top 5 tips for combatting the winter blues!</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/JB2h7rRRN60" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Nov 01, 2017
Episode 149: Grief & Loss
12:40
<p>The one thing everyone has in common is that we will all in some way be touched by death, whether it’s thoughts about our own demise, or having to deal with someone else’s. <br />And what’s really important to understand, whether you’re trying to be a supporting friend or you’re a grieving widow, it’s important to understand the rules of grieving, of which there is only one…</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/9PX_y0-sI6s" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Oct 01, 2017
Episode 148: Fear of Missing Out
17:11
Last week I noticed that my Sky TV hard drive box was getting full. There were a lot of satirical news programmes that I hadn’t watched and they were probably out of date. There were documentaries about topics that if I was really that interested in I’d have watched them by now. And it made me question why I’d set them to record in the first place. The conclusion I came to was that it was FOMO<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/lR22qkjEB3I" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Sep 01, 2017
Episode 147: The Psychology Of Stuff
14:30
Clients will often tell me that they feel overwhelmed with even the simple things in life, their house is a mess and they just don’t know where to start putting it right. Guess what their homework is?<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/HTPSQeDrqWk" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Aug 01, 2017
Episode 146: The Stigma Of Needing Help
15:58
Last week Ant McPartlin spoke out about his struggles with Depression and Anxiety. Making it public because he thinks that it’s important that people going through a rough time ask for help so as to get proper treatment. Great! But he followed it by also saying 'I feel like I have let a lot of people down and for that I am truly sorry.' That’s the part I didn’t like, because...<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/E08KZHZfpjM" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jul 01, 2017
Episode 145: Manchester
12:26
Presenting a Podcast about how to be positive and enthusiastic when so many people are sad and angry is difficult at the best of times, and last week felt like the worst of times. What good can possibly come from the murder of innocent people?<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/c9U_PhTOivA" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jun 01, 2017
Episode 144: The Happiness Paradox
14:32
Spring has arrived! And with it some sunshine to make us all happier. But will it actually make us any happier?<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/zY4mAyAcQw0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
May 01, 2017
Episode 143: Old Age & The Brain
17:30
<p>It’s almost Easter already and even though we’ve put the clocks forward it seems like only yesterday when we put them back an hour in the Autumn. <br />Time flies! I’ve mentioned before that 12 months to a 60 year old will obviously feel 6 times quicker than it does to a 10 year old but there’s also another reason.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/UYJhEX9kMeM" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Apr 01, 2017
Episode 142: DON’T Be The Best!
12:51
<p>Are you following the FA Cup at all? <br />I’m not a huge fan of football myself, but I know enough that when I see that lower league Sutton United are playing Premiership side Arsenal it’s worth looking up from whatever I’m reading and go “Huh? how did that happen?”. <br />Now, we all love an underdog story and so it would be amazing to see Sutton United beat Arsenal, it’s the stuff that films are made of! <br />But the underdog lost. Arsenal beat them 2-0, but the difference in the 2 teams are like George Forman fighting George Formby! It could easily have been 10-0 but Sutton kept their energy levels up and surprised Arsenal with how well they could play. <br />They walked off the pitch at the end of the day with their heads held high knowing that they did their best.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/g_shz5Jf_Tg" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Mar 01, 2017
Episode 141: Creating a Positive Mental Attitude
15:42
<p>Political divisiveness often gives rise to a tirade of reasons on social media why the other side is wrong. <br />With the rise of right wing extremism throughout Europe and the USA there seems to be a lot of people wanting Brexit to fail and Donald Trump to fail as President simply to prove themselves right. <br />But it’s worth looking at these things with a more positive stance. Whether you think these are good ideas or not we should still want things to work out well. <br />Deliberately wanting things to fail just so you can be proved right is like cutting off your nose to spite your face. A phrase with a nasty origin that goes back to the year 870 when St. Aebbe the Younger, the Mother Superior of a Scottish monastery, talked her fellow Nuns into disfiguring their faces order to render themselves unattractive to the incoming Viking invaders, so as to protect their chastity. <br />It worked, the Viking pirates saw the noseless Nuns and were so disgusted by their faces they turned their backs on them. But the Nuns never got much of a chance to high five as the Viking Pirates burnt their Monastery to the ground with them still inside to teach them a lesson. Hey ho.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/4Hy3ARPC9C4" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Feb 01, 2017
Episode 140: How To Make Habits Stick
13:21
<p>It’s a new year! <br />Time to join in with the tradition that every January we draw a line in the sand and decide to do something different with our lives. <br />Because doing it in November or December just feels wrong!</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/W6gtMlMdQ_c" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jan 01, 2017
Episode 139: Achieving The Impossible
14:51
<p>Look around you. <br />What inspires you? <br />Who inspires you? <br />Are you the stupidest person in the room? <br />If not, then you should be. And here’s why.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/3FyyQtNBN8g" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Dec 01, 2016
Episode 138: Keeping Up With The Joneses
15:19
<p>I have a question for you. <br />How much of your real life do you reveal to the external world around you? </p> <p>If someone asks you how you are, do you bombard them with your frustrations about your selfish spouse? Or about how you feel that your life is going by too quickly and there’s a sense of impending doom everywhere you go? </p> <p>Or do you say “Fine thanks, you?”.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/pe5Thzn4Lrk" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Nov 01, 2016
Episode 137: The Likeable You
15:11
<p>Many people fall for the mistaken belief that being likeable is linked to something innate and unlearned, something you must be born with. <br />As if it’s linked to how attractive or talented you are. <br />Yet in reality being likeable is simply a matter of understanding other people, empathy. A skill that can easily be learned.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/QW-_cqLuf5A" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Oct 01, 2016
Episode 136: Why It's OK To Be A Loser
18:36
<p>It sucks being a loser. <br />Everyone wants to win and it seems to have become built into our culture that failure is not an option. <br />But it is! <br />As a 9 month old child how many times would we have fallen over when learning to walk? <br />How many mistakes did we make when learning to speak? <br />How many answers did we get wrong in our tests at school? <br />And how many job applications do we have to send out before even getting an interview, let alone offered a job? <br />As the old Chinese proverb says “Fall down seven times and get up eight”.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/S1xDXbSRv1w" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Sep 01, 2016
Episode 135: The Psychology Of Extremism
10:46
<p>How do we develop extreme opinions? <br />And why do some people need enemies in order to be happy? <br />All will be revealed!</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/yIdKLkwfNO0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Aug 01, 2016
Episode 134: Are You A Lobster?
11:11
<p>Almost 2000 years ago the man who was to become St Paul wrote that “Suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character” Nietzsche put it quite well with his phrase “That which does not kill us makes us stronger”. <br />This process is often referred to as Post Traumatic Growth, the idea that we can grow stronger because of adversity.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/H6Po0MHGcVc" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jul 01, 2016
Episode 133: Critical Thinking
12:49
<p>Critical Thinking has allowed us to learn that the earth isn’t flat after all, and that it’s definitely older than 4000 years. <br />It’s meant that Doctors no longer use chicken poo to try and cure baldness or blow tobacco smoke up someones bum in an attempt to cure a hernia. <br />In today's episode we look at the importance of Critical Thinking, especially in the run up to the EU Referendum.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/G7F2-XgVcGs" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jun 01, 2016
Episode 132: There Is Nothing Either Good Or Bad
12:33
<p>As Old Bill Shakespeare once said "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so" <br />In this episode I talk about the importance of distinguishing the meaning from an event that causes emotion and finding a better way of looking at it.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/_1nVjg90Z-4" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
May 01, 2016
Episode 131: The For And Against Of Imagination
10:01
<p>Almost every self help book you read will say something along the lines of "If you can see it, you can be it!" <br />They tell you about the importance of imagining the end result of your hard work to motivate you to make it happen. <br />But what if they're all wrong!</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/j0z6UFKQVN4" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Apr 01, 2016
Episode 130: Loneliness & Social Networks
13:21
<p>You’d think that the digital age would bring everyone closer together. <br />On the surface, Facebook looks as if it’s a great idea. It provides a great resource for fulfilling a basic human need. <br />The need for social connection. <br />But, rather than enhancing our well-being, research findings suggest that Facebook may actually makes us feel worse.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/tcUP3Mh7Jb4" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Mar 15, 2016
Episode 129: Letting Go Of The Past
12:30
<p>How many times do you need to hear a joke before it’s no longer funny? <br />3? <br />4? <br />5? <br />What if you replayed that joke every day for a few years, would you find it anywhere near as funny as you did when you first heard it? <br />I doubt it.</p> <p>So why do we find that we can hold onto bad experiences for years and still feel upset about it?</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/jFbAq9XKnrM" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Mar 01, 2016
Episode 128: What Is Love?
10:00
<p>As a wise man once said </p> <p>“I’m in love, I’m in love and I don't care who knows it"</p> <p>Granted, it was Will Ferrell in the Christmas film Elf, but the message still stands. But how do I know that I’m actually in love?</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/lFjPjwDDTbs" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Feb 15, 2016
Ep. 127: Procrastination
14:42
<p>Today is all about procrastination. <br />Why we put things off and how we can overcome it and get going.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/zJky7p2TEA0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Feb 01, 2016
Ep. 126: Who Were You Before The World Changed You?
13:22
<p>As I salute David Bowie and Alan Rickman and wave them off onto "A New Career in a New Town" I raise the question of how labels influence our personality. <br />Does labelling yourself change the way we act and feel? <br />Does other people labelling us do the same? <br />Come with me on a "Fantastic Voyage" and we'll see what we can figure out.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/vpbfueUvnos" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jan 15, 2016
Motivate Yourself 125: Stop Saying “Sorry”
12:06
<p>If someone bumps into you do YOU say sorry or do they say sorry? <br />Common sense says being bumped into is nothing to apologise for, but if your self-esteem is low then your default thinking might be, “If I didn’t exist they wouldn’t have bumped into me, so it’s my fault.” <br />It sounds like an exaggeration, but I know for a fact that some of you do go through that process. <br />Today we look at the habit people often develop of apologising unnecessarily.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/yjQFlwffAIc" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jan 04, 2016
Motivate Yourself 124: Emotional Contagion
16:03
<p>Have you ever walked into a room to find that everyone’s laughing about something and so you begin to smile and maybe even laugh yourself as you enquire what’s funny? <br />It happens all the time, but what was it that made YOU smile and laugh? After all you didn’t know what they were laughing at! <br />But in that moment your mood had genuinely lifted, even if for a second or so. <br />You were smiling and laughing simply because someone else was smiling and laughing all because of the phenomenon of what’s called Emotional Contagion.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/jcMqx_Fkvb0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Dec 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 123: Patience
13:50
<p>A lack of patience has probably always been an issue in society and it does seem to be getting worse. <br />But why?</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/weVhjF0mw8s" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Nov 14, 2015
Motivate Yourself 122: Building On Your Foundations
11:29
<p>As the Royal Navy Engineers say: If you can fix a skateboard, then you can ultimately fix anything. <br />But we need the steps in-between. <br />What happens though when a species becomes impatient and lazy?</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/V9rIeAoHaSY" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Nov 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 121: Dealing With The Critics.
10:56
<p>One thing that you can pretty much guarantee in life is that you will come under fire at some point, you WILL be criticised by someone. <br />How do we deal with it? <br />Well, let's find out.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/IRMTsTMzdvc" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Oct 15, 2015
Motivate Yourself 120: Being Assertive. Just Say No!
11:20
<p>Have you ever said “Yes” to something, when in your head you’re screaming “Nooooo!”? <br />Maybe you fit in with the attitude that “If you want to get something done, ask a busy person” <br />After all, that’s what people say isn’t it? <br />But, why is that?</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/CVhmWtEPxMQ" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Oct 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 119: Inactivity
11:23
<p>Ever heard of neuroplasticity? <br />It means the brain’s ability to change and a lot of research has been undertaken to show just how flexible our brain really is, and coming back from a holiday last month made me think.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/_hZQwUOhe3k" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Sep 15, 2015
Motivate Yourself 118: Social Functioning & Evolution
12:36
Why did a couple of drinks with a friend of mine whilst on holiday become the best thing about the whole trip?<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/gVsuo8FjR30" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Sep 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 117: Unleash Your Inner Superhero
11:53
<p>Have you ever pretended to be someone you’re not? <br />Maybe it’s not a bad thing.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/euoVL1R-NiI" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Aug 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 116: Goals, Values and Priorities
12:18
<p>Today's episode looks at the importance of valuing your goals. <br />Is the end result really that much of a priority?</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/tUF3fMgpagE" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jul 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 115: 10 Tips To A Happier Life
16:55
This month I want to give you a quick Top 10 of the hints and tips that I talk about as a therapist when helping people to become happier.<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/XyaDbCXsJBQ" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jun 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 114: Lies And Confabulation
18:45
<p>How many times in a day do you think you lie to yourself? <br />Believe me, it's more than you think. <br />In fact you lie so much, that you believe your own lies. You even have constant hallucinations that create a whole new reality around you. <br />A version of your own personal world that is different to the reality that anyone else may experience.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/Kz57I0EImyc" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
May 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 113: Confirmation Bias
12:59
<p>As the old saying goes “Be careful what you look for, incase you find it.” <br />This month is all about a psychological tendency we all have, to search for or interpret information in such a way that our reality confirms our existing preconceptions. <br />Even if our existing preconceptions are incorrect.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/-YzeBCgVrX0" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Apr 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 112: Are You An Imposter?
12:37
<p>If you've ever thought to yourself, "One of these days everyone will find out that I'm not as clever as they think I am," then you're in good company. <br />In today's episode Richard talks about Imposter Syndrome.</p><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/D4fVyw9poso" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Mar 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 111: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
13:29
How do you think you'd feel if you encountered severe psychological trauma? Would witnessing 26 people being shot damage you or strengthen you? You may be surprised.<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/V02e22uPzq4" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Feb 01, 2015
Motivate Yourself 110: Are New Years Resolutions a good idea or not?
16:25
I regularly talk about new years resolutions being a bad idea for permanent success, but what if that's not always the case.<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/richardnicholls/~4/g3vWXAeGpb8" height="1" width="1" alt=""/>
Jan 06, 2015