Don't Mom Alone Podcast

By Heather MacFadyen

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Description

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, connects you the listener with people and resources to help you feel less alone. Consider it an invitation to "withness".

Episode Date
Choosing Connecting Over Critique :: Rachel Macy Stafford [Ep 280]
51:25

Rachel’s 'Hands Free Mama' mentality is all about finding balance in a media-saturated, perfection-obsessed world. And it’s about seizing the little moments that life offers us to engage in real and meaningful interaction.

In this episode, Rachel shares realizing she 'd lost connection with her people. How she believed a lie that in order to be loved and accepted she needed to hide certain parts of herself, the messy parts, the imperfect parts. A pivotal moment happened when she vulnerably shared these thoughts with her daughter and found acceptance.

“Opening that door to being human actually brings us closer together. Then we can connect from that place of 'I'm struggling' and that doesn't mean there's something wrong with me. That doesn't mean I need to hide it. It means I need to reach out and talk to someone about this so we can work together to see how we might go forward.”

We dive into what Rachel’s learned in her parenting journey as a mom of teens and preteens. She talks about how choosing true connection with our kids can bring them closer to us and keep the lines of communication open as they grow up. 

“This is all about redefining what our role is as a parent. It is not the authoritarian model anymore. It is the guide, the truth teller and the encourager. Not the enforcer, not the half listener, not the critic. That those roles are only going to get us further and further from each other when the idea is right now we need to come closer.”

Connect with Rachel: 

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Links Mentioned:  

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Apr 06, 2020
Listening to the Lord :: Kelsey Phillips [Ep 279]
47:58

A few years ago, my friend Kelsey Philips hit a crisis in her life. She felt physically unwell, depressed and desperate for healing. She connected with a missionary couple from her church who prayed with her and over her for two hours. It was in that prayer time that Kelsey recognized God’s voice for the first time.

He had been speaking to me for a long time. I just didn't know it was him. When you have an encounter like that, he speaks to these places that are so deep. He is healing wounds that are so far back and he is breaking you free of chains that are so heavy and hard and real. You don't ever want to go back to a place where you don't have that.

As we are in a worldwide crisis with the COVID-19 pandemic, I’m asking you to listen to Kelsey’s story with an open heart and mind. I believe we can hear God’s voice and that he is still speaking today. As Kelsey reminds us, there’s no better time than now to practice listening to the Lord. 

“It does require solitude and quiet and that is not our nature. But here we are in a season where we are in worldwide rest. We are forced into this place of quiet. We've all had to come off of the hamster wheel and this has been an incredible time to allow space to listen to him about what he's doing on so many levels.”

Links Mentioned:  

Additional Resources:

Mar 30, 2020
Faith in the Unexpected :: Christine Caine [Re-Run]
41:32

In light of an unexpected time in history, our team thought we all need to be reminded of the Truth of who God is and to have our faith emboldened. This episode stood out as the perfect one to re-release. This conversation originally aired Spring of 2018.

Powerhouse Christine Caine shares how she let go of fear and found faith for when the unexpected happened. Lots of truth and encouragement here for anyone who has encountered fear in parenting, a medical diagnosis and rejection in friendships… so all of us!

"Jesus never said we’re not going to have trials. He said, 'When trials come', not if, but when. I think sometimes as believers we forget that, but we have a grace within it. I think part of our testimony to a lost and broken world is the way we go through it."

What we chat about:

  • Christine Caine’s new book, Unexpected
  • Emboldening our faith and letting go of fear in motherhood
  • Trusting that God will fill in the gaps of what we’re able to do as parents
  • Basic spiritual practices can be some of the most powerful things in our lives
  • Facing painful actualites in a fallen world
  • Christine’s reaction to her cancer diagnosis
  • Jesus is the name above all other names, including cancer
  • Having a “faith cocoon” of friends to encourage you in the face of fear
  • Enduring suffering as Christians
  • Giving in to the pain and fear and suffering is not the answer
  • We serve a God who is bigger!
  • Godly motherhood in this generation is harder than it’s ever been
  • Leaning in with a spirit of faith and not pulling back with a spirit of fear
  • We’re called to train our children up and not restrain their giftings
  • Dealing with rejection in friendship and moving forward

Connect with Chris:

Links Mentioned: 

Mar 23, 2020
Giving Kids a Firm Foundation :: Troy Simons [Ep 278]
44:45

So much of parenting can feel like constantly disciplining our kids for their behaviors. This sets up a system of praise for good behavior, but doesn’t address the heart of our kids. 

As the Bible says in Isaiah 29:13, “The Lord says: "These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is based on merely human rules they have been taught.”

As followers of Jesus, I know that we want more for our kids than to just acknowledge God with their lips. My talk today with Troy Simons has some practical advice and encouragement for us on how to have heart-level conversations about the Gospel with our kids.

You'll find that your understanding of who God is and what he's done with the Gospel will be there. And you'll find that coming out in your conversation with your kid. Be humble enough to be transparent about when you've been rebuked. You know, it may be some deep-seated, long struggling issue in your life. That kind of candor and response with our kids and conversation is just gold for them. It wins their hearts and shows them the influence of God’s word.

Learn more about Troy and Ruth’s new easy-to-read family devotion book that includes Scripture, devotional thoughts, and discussion questions for leading your family through 12 Biblical Truths.

Connect with the Troy: 

 Links Mentioned:  

** Amazon affiliate link

Mar 16, 2020
Postpartum Depression :: Brittany Turner [Ep 277]
45:37

As difficult as pregnancy and birth tend to be, the postpartum period can be the hardest of all. After all the anticipation you finally have your baby! But many women don’t feel like themselves. They feel sad or hopeless and struggle to connect with their babies. 

My guest Brittany J. Turner takes us into her story of postpartum depression and what it took for her to start a journey towards wholeness.

For me it was years of pain that I had never dealt with. They were feeding this lie that I was alone, that I was unworthy of being loved, not just in my marital and parenting relationships, but I was unworthy of being loved as a daughter, as a friend and that I deserve to be alone. And so therapy was my escape.

While postpartum depression can’t totally be prevented or even predicted, we also talk about what went differently after she had her next child and the big part friendships and deeper community played.

Connect with the Brittany: 

 Links Mentioned:  

Featured Sponsor: Seek and Find Bible

Go to crossway.org/DMA3 to save 40% off ESV children's Bibles now until March 16th. 

Mar 09, 2020
Answering Your Questions :: Heather MacFadyen [Ep 276]
38:57

This week Don’t Mom Alone’s host Heather MacFadyen answers your questions! She shares everything from a favorite weeknight recipe to her personal testimony of faith and what worship song she has on repeat.

“That song to me just takes you to a place of setting aside all distraction and anything that's trying to pull you from his presence and his get you to a place of listening. I think sitting and listening to the Lord is probably where are we all struggle the most these days. We want to study, we want to check off something off a list, but to still ourselves and listen is really hard.”


If you have questions on helping your kids bond, how to find time to read the Bible while you’re raising little kids or want to know some of Heather’s favorite podcast guests, listen in!

(Big thanks to my virtual assistant Sarah-Jane Menefee for playing the role of host in this episode! She did a fantastic job!)

Connect with the Heather: 

 Episodes Mentioned:  

Links Mentioned:  

Featured Sponsor: ESV Seek and Find Bible crossway.org/DMA2 to save 40% off by March 9th. 

Mar 02, 2020
Coping Mechanisms, Recovery and Codependency :: Taylor Bashta [Ep 275]
50:42

Twelve years into her marriage, Taylor Bashta knew that something was wrong. Her husband who had always been a casual drinker had become more and more dependent on alcohol. She started Googling, “What is an alcoholic?” and wondered what she should do to intervene. 

Taylor bravely takes us into her story to share what she did next and how setting firm boundaries and seeking help took both her and her husband on a journey of healing. Now, one year later, she shares what’s made the biggest impact and what they are doing to continue their healing.

“He is the only person in charge of his recovery. And I am the only person in charge of mine. We can not let each other effect that. I still live wondering what we’d do if he relapses. I think that's one of the scariest parts of recovery. AA’s big slogan is 'One Day at a Time.' So that’s what we’re focused on. Just one day at a time.”

Taylor talks about how we can support friends who may be going through this type of situation and how sharing openly can make all the difference.  

“Hiding is what kills us inside. And our hiding is what invites that shame, guilt, and condemnation. When you put it out there, it's gone. You're putting away gossip, you're putting away just the pressure. When you name it, it takes the power out of it.” 

Connect with the Bashtas: 

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 More Episodes:  

FEATURED SPONSORS:

Seek and Find Bible -- www.Crossway.org/DMA4 to save 40% off children's ESV Bibles

FabFitFun -- www.fabfitfun.com use DMA10 to save $10 off your first box 

 

Feb 24, 2020
Training an Oppositional Child (Bonus Episode) Dr. Scott Turansky
13:04

During the last 10 minutes of my conversation with Dr. Turansky I asked him about how to train a child with oppositional behavior. He mentioned 7 different tools. With each tool there are several resources available through his website (https://www.biblicalparenting.org/). 

Please listen to Ep 274 for the rest of the conversation. 

Feb 21, 2020
Training a Child's Heart :: Dr. Scott Turansky [Ep 274]
42:39

When a child disobeys, our knee-jerk reaction is typically to discipline with consequences. It’s probably how we were parented and seems like the best choice at the moment. But what if we took a different approach? 

My guest Scott Turansky has some exciting, hope-filled news for us. We can look at our child’s behavior and identify a heart attitude that needs training. Changing their attitudes or internal motivations is what will drive external or behavioral change. 

“I would suggest that parents move to consequences too quickly and that another approach is needed to make a lasting change in a child's heart. If we strategically focus on the heart of a child and use techniques that are more internally-focused, we can see some really significant things take place.”

Scott is an expert in parenting. He literally teaches college courses on it. He’s the director at the National Center for Biblical Parenting, the author of several books and a father of five. Scott shares a lot of wisdom and practical advice for moving our kids from a place of defiance and disobedience to an attitude of honor and selflessness. 

It’s a lot to take in, but so good and full of hope. We can do this and Scott is here with resources and ideas to help us train our kids’ hearts. 

Connect with Scott: 

Links Mentioned:  

Featured Sponsor : ESV Seek and Find Bible Until 2/24/20 save 40% off at crossway.org/DMA1

Featured Sponsor : FabFitFun Use DMA10 at www.FabFitFun.com to save $10 off your first box

Feb 17, 2020
Navigating Friendships :: Melanie Shankle [Ep 273]
40:12

Finding friends as an adult, keeping up with friends when you become a mom, transitioning friendships as your children grow up… No one tells you what to expect. But, friendships are worth investing in and they are a key part of what helps us not mom alone.

Author, speaker and mentor mom Melanie Shankle joins me to share how she’s navigated friendships as an adult. She opens up about what worked, what didn’t and a few things she wishes she’d done differently.

“I think it was some of it was my own insecurities of getting out there and making new friends. I don't find women to be any less intimidating in my forties than I found them to be when I was 16 years old. I think there's also a thing as women that we tend to get in a circle and be inward-focused and we aren't good about looking out to see who might need a friend or who may want to be included.”

Melanie talks candidly about her friendships, being an introvert and about how friendship doesn’t mean we have to agree on everything. Looking back, she wishes she’d been more open to meeting people and making friends instead of being more inwardly-focused. 

“I think you would be better off going with the assumption that everybody would like to make a new friend. You know, just that everybody's open to friendship and to get to know a new person.”

Connect with Melanie: 

Links Mentioned:  

Episodes on Friendship:

Feb 10, 2020
Fighting Toxic Thoughts :: Jennie Allen Ep 272
44:28

It starts subtly the same way it did with Eve in the garden. “Did God really say?” These small lies from the enemy pass through our minds as one of the 60,000 thoughts we have each day. But lies don’t stay small.

Some take root and build highways and cities in our brain that cause us to question God, question who we are and live in fear that the lies are actually the truth. 

My guest Jennie Allen talks about how to fight back against the lies that are constantly thrown at us. She opens up about her doubts and how she’s learned to fight back in the war for her mind. We talk about everything from mom guilt to questioning God’s existence to fighting for the minds of our kids. 

Jennie shares that we have to recognize there’s a battle and we have to fight it with the right kind of weapons.

“This is a spiritual war and we have to throw spiritual weapons at it. And then it says in 2 Corinthians 10 that we are given divine weapons that can destroy strongholds. So those of you out there that are like, you know what? This isn't passive, that thought of doubt or this isn't passive, this is a stronghold that has captivated me most of my life. Scripture says that we have divine weapons to destroy it. Now those divine weapons, we've got to choose to employ them and it's not easy.”

Listen as we learn how to fight back in the war for our minds.

Connect with Jennie: 

Links Mentioned:  

Feb 03, 2020
Finding God Faithful :: Kelly Minter [Ep 271]
46:07

Kelly Minter followed her dreams to Nashville to pursue a career in music. After years of highs and lows as an artist (mostly lows), Kelly had the opportunity to switch fields and write her first Bible study with LifeWay Publishers. 

Kelly shares with us about how in the midst of disappointment and unfulfilled dreams, she has found God faithful to continue writing her story. One of her first studies centered on the life of Joseph, a man who also had dreams that weren’t fulfilled the way he expected.

“Suffering made Joseph fit for the dreams that God had for him. Those dreams were birthed and they were going to happen. But it was the hard, difficult process that made Joseph ready and able for those dreams. Because a lot of humbling had to happen, a lot of faith had to be forged, a lot of obedience had to be built and a lot had to happen for Joseph to be ready for that.”

Now an established author and speaker, Kelly has a gorgeous new cookbook out focused on accessible recipes to inspire your cooking and stories about building community around the table.

Links Mentioned:  

Jan 27, 2020
Grace According to Our Needs :: Beth Moore [Ep 270]
52:55

It’s not an exaggeration to say that Beth Moore is a spiritual mother and inspiration to many women. Her numerous Bible studies and books are a staple in women’s ministries at countless churches. 

Instead of just an interview promoting her new book, she took the time to chat with me about her own hard experiences in motherhood and marriage. Get ready for some real talk about real life and real problems. Beth doesn’t want to be seen on a pedestal. 

Whether it was the difficulties of the busy schedule ministry and speaking or the dynamic of spiritual leadership in her home, Beth shares that she’s always found God to be faithful in her places of need. 

“There is grace for every day. I always think of the mercies of God when he says in Lamentations, that his mercies are new every morning. I think about the manna and how each person gathered exactly what they needed. That’s how God’s grace is for us. It is always given according to our needs.”

Beth is a powerful communicator and our interview only gets better as we keep talking. Hang in there to the end for a holy ground moment when she prays over all of us.

“Father, I ask you for supernatural trust in these mothers. I ask you that right now you would settle and establish their hearts that they are intimately known by you. I pray, father, that they will rest in the assurance that there is nothing they can do to shake your love or even shake away your presence with them.”

Connect with Beth: 

Links Mentioned:  

 

Jan 20, 2020
Intimacy with God is the Main Thing :: Kim Cash Tate [Ep 269]
36:50

As a lawyer who felt pressure to provide for her family and make a career for herself, Kim Cash Tate was surprised to feel God calling her to a ministry of staying home with her kids and later homeschooling them. 

She could have ignored the prompting and pursued her career, but Kim chose to “cling” to God and step out in faith. That decision took her to a lot of places that a law career never would. She became a fiction writer and led Bible studies and now writes and stars in a web series and in music videos.

But her focus isn’t about making a name for herself or reaching a goal. It’s always been about intimacy with God and following his leading in her life. 

If you feel stuck in your current season of motherhood or discouraged that you have dreams you haven’t seen fulfilled, Kim’s story can give you hope and expectancy that God is still writing your story. 

And as we choose to draw near to him, he is faithful to lead us to things that are better than we could’ve planned on our own.

Connect with Kim: 

Links Mentioned:  

Verses Mentioned:

You must follow the LORD your God, fear him, observe his commandments, listen to his voice, serve him, and cling to him. Deuteronomy 13:4 

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10

Featured Sponsor : PrepDish

Prep Dish meal plans were created by chef and dietician Allison Schaaf to help save you time and put home-cooked meals on the table. No meal time stress. No more answering the dreaded question, “What’s for Dinner?!”. Developed by chef and dietician Allison Schaaf, Prep Dish is a healthy, whole food based meal plan subscription service. Allison does all the planning for you- including easy-to-follow shopping lists and prep-ahead instructions so you know what to prepare and when. NOW offering KETO MEAL PLANS!

Imagine…all of your meals prepped and ready to go for the entire week. We like to call this meal time bliss! Get 2 weeks FREE go to Prepdish.com/dma.

Featured Sponsor: Connected Families

Your kids will mess up. So will you. Connected Families believes that the perfect time to build wisdom and GROW your relationship with your kids is during the messy times. They’ve developed an 8-session online course called Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart. It is only offered twice a year, so register today! https://connectedfamilies.org/dtc/online-course/ Use coupon code DMA15 for 15% off!

Jan 13, 2020
Declutter Like a Mother Allie Casazza Ep 268
40:36

Mountains of laundry, piles of toys and all the other “stuff” of life that comes into our homes can feel overwhelming, even to the neatest of moms with the best of intentions. We all love our families, but living with the messes and the clutter that comes along with them is a challenge.

My guest Allie Casazza knows what it feels like to be overwhelmed by constantly cleaning and picking up her house at the expense of enjoying time with her kids. A few years ago with four kids under the age of five, Allie had a moment of clarity with God as she sat crying in her bathroom.

If all I'm doing is cleaning up and it's just a bunch of stuff we don't really need, then what if we just didn't have stuff anymore?

That moment changed the course of her family. It also changed how she viewed motherhood and all the “stuff” that comes along with it. Now, she shares the practical ideas and the mental shifts that helped keep the clutter away to free up her life for what matters most. 

Connect with Allie: 

Links Mentioned:  

Featured Sponsor: PrepDish

Prep Dish meal plans were created by chef and dietician Allison Schaaf to help save you time and put home-cooked meals on the table. No meal time stress. No more answering the dreaded question, “What’s for Dinner?!”. Developed by chef and dietician Allison Schaaf, Prep Dish is a healthy, whole food based meal plan subscription service. Allison does all the planning for you- including easy-to-follow shopping lists and prep-ahead instructions so you know what to prepare and when. NOW offering KETO MEAL PLANS!

Imagine…all of your meals prepped and ready to go for the entire week. We like to call this meal time bliss! Get 2 weeks FREE go to Prepdish.com/dma.

Featured Sponsor: Connected Families

Your kids will mess up. So will you. Connected Families believes that the perfect time to build wisdom and GROW your relationship with your kids is during the messy times. They’ve developed an 8-session online course called Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart. It is only offered twice a year, so register today! https://connectedfamilies.org/dtc/online-course/ Use coupon code DMA15 for 15% off!

Jan 06, 2020
Broken Crayons Still Color Toni Collier Ep 267
45:54

Toni Collier’s short childhood ended in third grade when her mother had a stroke and she was practically left alone to care for her. Toni carried many heavy emotional burdens in her childhood and felt deeply that she had to protect herself because the world was not a safe place. 

Fast forward several years and Toni’s strength of will to avoid the emotional trauma she experienced as a child finally ran out. Now a mom and reeling from an emotionally abusive first marriage, Toni sought counseling and therapy for the healing she so desperately needed. 

“I was so blind to how unhealthy my life actually was, and the unveiling, the unwrapping of this emotional onion made me worse. But there was a healed Toni that I had to get to. Not just for me, but for my daughter and my new marriage. The only thing that brought me through was the hope that there is a God who said he could trade my weakness for his power.”

Toni opens up about the “treacherous” process of facing intense emotional trauma, the shame and stigma that surrounds therapy and what it’s like to parent in the midst of facing your own brokenness.

Now as a powerful communicator and host with North Point Ministries, Toni has learned that God can take our broken, painful pasts and use them to minister to others. 

“I hopped on stage at North Point and my entire life changed in weeks. It was the first time in a long time that I had been in a ministry that's celebrated my gifts, wasn't intimidated by them, and also welcomed my brokenness. It is as if I had experienced a new Jesus.”

Nov 25, 2019
Gratitude With Every Bite Melissa D'Arabian Ep 266
46:57

Melissa d’Arabian is a winner of “The Next Food Network Star,” a celebrity chef, author, and mom of four. She’s is an expert on affordable and healthy family home cooking who has inspired people with her shows on Food Network. 

A few years ago, God inspired Melissa to do a deep dive into scripture and prayer to evaluate the meaning of food in her life. What she discovered is our relationship with food reflects our understanding of God and his creation. 

In her new book, Tasting Grace, she invites readers to appreciate food as not only a gift from God but also as a deeper invitation into his love.

“Every meal we have can be an invitation into creativity, community, and patience. The fact that I could sit there and even for a moment and marvel and at least to honor everything that's gone into my food connected me more to God and it made me enjoy the food more.”

We talk about how meals can bring us closer to God and how he created a food system to nourish us and delight our palates. Melissa is passionate about separating food and body image and saying no to the negative perspective often put on food. 

“I want my children when they are young women going out there in the world to have the joy of a great relationship with food. And so if I talk about myself in a way that is unkind, not only are my kids hearing it, but God is hearing it. Speaking in terms of body image and all of that, I think it must make God feel sad when I reject the body he has given me. ”

Nov 18, 2019
6th Podcast-iversary Heather MacFadyen Ep 265
26:12

 

Wow! Six years into podcasting and the 265 episodes of this show have been downloaded 8.7 million times across 204 different countries. Today we are celebrating our podcast-iversary with a “best-of” show featuring clips from your favorite episodes. 

We’re also featuring testimonials from listeners who share how the podcast has helped them not mom alone. Like these quotes from moms:

“This podcast has really become my one-stop show for all things parenting. I love how you cover such a wide range of topics and how all of your guests are filled with grace and grounded in God’s word and his truth.”

“It has totally changed my perspective on motherhood. I’ve gone from feeling quite frustrated and alone to knowing that other moms are dealing with the same things. I don’t feel quite so lonely. All the encouragement is really changing my life.”

Thanks so much for listening to the Don’t Mom Alone podcast. I’m thankful it’s made an impact in your lives. When I started this six years ago, I couldn’t imagine where it would take me. As for the future? Well, we’ll just have to see where God takes us!

Special Production Help from Airr:

Ever wanted to share a specific quote or clip from your favorite podcast with a friend, but didn’t know how? This week’s sponsor, Airr, solves that problem by making it simple to share clips from specific episodes. 

I’m going to start featuring listeners “airr quotes” in my Monday email. Make sure you go to https://www.airr.io/dontmomalone to sign up and start listening and quoting. 

Nov 11, 2019
Compassion Changes Everything :: Jonathan Almonte [Ep 264]
47:17

Jonathan Almonte’s story shows how sponsoring a child through Compassion International (or other similar programs) can change the course of a child’s life. 

However, it is the compassion of the people in his story who loved him when he fought back and wrote him letters calling out his identity and inherent worth as a child of God that may have made the biggest difference.

“That letter changed my life. I was believing that I was a mistake. I was believing that God was not good for me. This letter helped me to understand that God provided a woman called Jamie thousands of kilometers away in a place called Michigan celebrating Thanksgiving. This woman wrote a letter to say, I am thankful for you. You are special, you're not a mistake.”

As a child of a single mom in the Dominican Republic, Jonathan’s prospects were greatly limited. From a young age, he worked to earn enough money for each day’s food. The cost of getting into a school, a uniform as supplies, was nowhere near his grasp. 

His mother applied for him to join the Compassion program and (after a wait) he was accepted. For the first time in his life, all of his educational, nutritional, medical, and physical needs were taken care of, and Jonathan felt believed in like he never had before. 

“I was selling juice on the streets. I was diving in a garbage area without hope. So this ministry for me meant my life. My life is before and after the ministry of Compassion in partnership with the local church in my community. ”

I hope this episode leads you to text "Heather" to 83393 and sponsor a child like Jonathan. 

Nov 04, 2019
Foster Care Story of Hope Victoria Petersen Ep 263
45:54

On the surface, Victoria (Tori) Petersen’s story doesn’t sound full of hope. Her growing up years were filled with abuse, a mom who struggled with drugs, and more than 10 foster homes with no hope of adoption.

But God’s heart for Tori wasn’t death; it was life. Through a series of relationships and her own study, Tori learned about God. She experienced sacrificial love and community in the church and through her foster parents. It changed her whole future.

“The encouragement, the support, and the ability to see that through their words, through God's speaking through these people and acting through these people in love showed me that I did have a future, that God did have a plan for me and that if I trusted in him, that plan would blossom into something.”

After emancipating from the foster care system, Tori’s life has had more ups and downs. But, she is confident in her identity in Christ and learning more every day. Now as a mom and wife, God is redeeming her story and using it to encourage others who are a part of the foster system.

“I think foster parents remembering that they are image-bearers and in those hard times to be able to humble themselves and say,’ I am weak and I'm going to call on God's strength to love this child.’ Also communicating to the child that they're made in God's image. They are loved despite any kind of behavior or any saddening event that they have been through. Identity in Christ is crucial to the relationship between foster youth and foster parents.”

Oct 28, 2019
You Deserve a Mentor Susie Davis Ep 262
45:23

Susie Davis is a mentor of mentors. She’s the author of several books and host of the Dear Daughters podcast. I’m so excited to share our conversation with you as she answers your questions about mentorship, marriage and meeting with God. 

“I think you deserve a mentor. I think it's God's will for your life to have an older woman that you can talk to who has wisdom for you and your specific situation.”

In her book and podcast, Dear Daughters, Susie seeks to bring together younger women and spiritual moms. Each of us has valuable insight for one other, but getting started with mentoring can be a hurdle. Whether you have a mentor, are a mentor or want to start, Susie shares encouragement and insight into establishing and maintaining a healthy mentor relationship. (including what not to say!)

We also talk about marriage and how to love your man without losing your mind about the little things that can drive us crazy. 

“I think marriage is the greatest opportunity for sanctification, which is just becoming more like God. It is the one relationship that is never supposed to end. You're ‘trapped’ in it and you have to work it out with them.”

Talking with Susie is such a gift. She shares a wealth of wisdom from the perspective of someone who has experienced a lot of growth in her own life and marriage over the years. Grab a cup of coffee and listen in as Susie mentors us all!

Oct 21, 2019
Racial Reconciliation Starts with You Latasha Morrison Ep 261
41:46

Racial tensions in America are as high within the church as outside of it. My guest Latasha Morrison believes Jesus followers must become the leaders in the conversation on racial reconciliation. That we must, “build a bridge” to bring justice, healing and transformation.

“It starts with awareness and then acknowledging the pain and brokenness. We didn't create it, but it is all of our responsibility to be a part of the solution. And no one gets an ‘out’ here.”

Latasha founded the organization Be the Bridge in 2016 to encourage racial reconciliation among all ethnicities, to promote racial unity in America, and to equip others to do the same. Now she’s written a book of the same name that comes out this week. 

We talk in depth about racial reconciliation, biblical justice and the diversity of God’s kingdom. It’s not an easy conversation, but it’s a necessary one. I pray you will listen with an open mind and heart for all God wants to do to bring unity to the body of Christ. 

“Every culture is an expression of who God is and not one ethnicity can represent the totality of who God is. We serve a diverse God. If you’re thinking that God looks just like you and talks just like you, remember, Jesus didn't speak English. Sometimes we need a reality check on that. Just because something is different doesn't make it wrong.”

Oct 14, 2019
The Window of Tolerance Charissa Fry Ep 260
39:43

As parents, we are keenly aware of the peaks and valleys of our kids’ emotions. Anger, sadness, excitement, and all the other feelings can make us feel like our child is on a roller coaster we’re just trying to slow down. 

It’s true that we all feel highs and lows throughout our day, but we rarely talk about what it feel like when we’re “in the zone” and feeling calm and ready to go. My guest today is sharing about the window of tolerance and how to regulate ourselves and our kids to help stay in that window. 

“If I am dysregulated, I cannot regulate my child. So if I'm in fight or flight and I'm yelling. There's no amount of yelling that brings my child back into the window. And sometimes parents think the yelling is working, but what you're doing isn’t getting your child in the window. They're going into collapse and into a place of fear.”

Charissa Fry is a Licensed Professional Counselor and believer. Her passion is to come alongside those who are hurting and struggling to help them find truth, hope, healing, connection, and growth. She shares some eye-opening information and statistics to get us on the path to helping our kids build resilience and stay in that window of tolerance. 

Charissa shares from a faith-perspective that we as believers are not alone. She reminds us that we can lean on God to regulate our emotions as we love on our kids and go through the hardships of life. 

“God himself through Jesus is the ultimate attachment figure. He is always reaching for us. He never fails to respond to our needs. He always loves us. He's never judging us and never shaming us. So to know that when we need to be co-regulated, that when I am feeling like I'm going to leave the window, I can remember the truth of who God is and I can reach out to him in prayer.”

Oct 07, 2019
The Enneagram, Marriage and the Gospel Beth McCord Ep 259
46:49

It’s a popular (and sometimes controversial) typology system that can help you understand yourself and others better, but how can we use the Enneagram in light of the gospel to help our marriages thrive? 

Beth McCord of Your Enneagram Coach is here to walk us how to look at our marriages and close relationships through the lens of the Enneagram and the Gospel. 

“With the Enneagram, you can see that we all struggle. We all need Jesus. It's just we need it in different ways. And he makes us more like him in different ways as well. It's called the body of Christ and we reflect Christ differently. We all need to bring our uniqueness to glorify him and bless each other.”

We talk about how using the Enneagram can improve communication and compassion in our marriages and what to do if your spouse has no interest in learning his type. (hint: the answer isn’t to bug him about it) 

Beth shares that no one pairing out of the 45 possible Enneagram matches in marriage is better than any other, but it’s our surrender to Christ that makes all the difference. 

“I can guarantee you there is not a combination that is better or worse. Any two types that are surrendering and depending on the grace of God through Christ’s work on the cross on our behalf will be a blessing to one another.”

Sep 30, 2019
Helping Your Child with Sensory Processing Issues Lynne Jackson Ep 258
44:18

When a child processes sensory information just a little differently than his or her peers it can mean BIG emotions, meltdowns and a huge struggle for us as parents. 

Often these kids are labeled as “sensitive” or “intense” and they might cause us to avoid playdates and public places because we’re never sure what seemingly small issue will cause the next explosion. 

Lynne Jackson of Connected Families joins me to uncover the mysteries behind our kids with sensory struggles and how we can help them thrive. We talk about Sensory Processing Disorder and the wide range of sensory processing symptoms.  

As a mom who had two kids with sensory processing needs and as a licensed occupational therapist, Lynne encourages us to become a student of our kids and try to understand their point of view.

“Imagine if the volume on all your sounds and the sensations in your body was turned up and you were to trying to fall asleep, that would be really hard. Car rides and meals are often torturous. So then what are the kids doing? They're trying to cope. They're jumping down. They're complaining about the food and squirming in their seats. They're trying to do something so they feel in control.”

We talk about what to do if you suspect a sensory processing problem in one of your kids and where to seek help. I share my story of working through this with one of my boys and why I wish we’d gone to see a therapist sooner.

Sep 23, 2019
Forgiving My Alcoholic Mother Sarah Mae Ep 257
47:02

Author, blogger and podcast host Sarah Mae joins me to share her story of working through the generational bondage of alcoholism and the verbal and emotional abuse she suffered from her mother. 

“I remember yelling out, 'I'm going to kill myself,' and her saying, 'Go ahead, I dare you.' And that was it for me. I just bawled because I felt so unloved and so confused.”

In her new book The Complicated Heart, Sarah takes us into her painful past and all she experienced with her mom. She also shares the hope and victory of how God wooed her heart and changed the direction of her family forever. 

“Dysfunction does not have to be your legacy. It does not have to be your identity. And you do not have to pass it on to your kids. It doesn't matter if you were born into it, married into it or you created it yourself. There is always victory on the table. We just have to be willing to pick it up.”

Throughout our chat, Sarah is candid and encouraging. She shares openly about the abortion she had at 16 and the healing she’s experienced from bravely speaking out against the shame of past sin and accepting God’s grace as all-sufficient. 

Sep 16, 2019
Porn-Proofing Our Kids Kristen Jenson Ep 256
47:45

Access to the internet is everywhere in our modern world. And that means access to pornography and sexual imagery is everywhere too. Rather than bury our heads in the sand or cross our fingers that our kids won’t see porn, we can choose to be proactive and to give them a plan for how to react. 

Kristen Jenson, the best-selling author or Good Picture Bad Pictures, joins me to share some simple ways to talk with our kids about porn and protect their minds. 

“Pornography makes a child more vulnerable to sexual abuse. So if you porn-proof your child by starting these conversations early, you are actually helping your child to be more protected from child sexual abuse. When you start these discussions it's not as hard as you think. And once you do, you've begun this journey with your child to trust you for answers. You tell them, ‘Don't go on Google to ask these questions. Come and talk to me.’”

This may feel like a super heavy topic, but I promise it’s worth taking the proactive approach now vs waiting till you have teenagers. Kristen shares a lot of resources and makes it easy to get started. 

Sep 09, 2019
Become What You Behold Ruth Simons Ep 255
37:31

My guest today is Ruth Chou Simons. She’s a mom of six boys and an author and entrepreneur. You may know her best from the beautiful watercolor prints and products she creates for her business on Gracelaced.com. 

In her newest book, Beholding and Becoming: The Art of Everyday Worship, Grace shares about how every day is an opportunity to be shaped and formed by what moves our hearts and captures our gaze. 

We dive into what that looks like in Ruth’s life and how choosing to focus on Christ changes everything from our perspective on our parenting and work to how we look to others. 

The most unhappy I get is if I get preoccupied with somebody else's story. And I don't give thanks and I don't jot down reminders of how he's provided for the ultimate story of redemption in my life. And also how he's working that out day by day and writing my story anew.

We talk about how our fast-paced, hustle culture steals the joy and the beauty away from the everyday faithfulness of growing in God. My favorite reminder she shared is, “You don’t have to be blooming to be growing.”

So true. How often do we start something and expect instant gratification and quick wins? We want easy-to-share glossy images of success. But God looks at our hearts. At the slow growing happening under the surface. We are all in process with God until we see him in heaven. 

Let’s celebrate the small wins and focus on turning our eyes toward God and away from the distractions and hollow gratification of social media. As Ruth reminds us, we become what we behold. Those small, unseen decisions really add up to who we are. 

Because at the end of the day, every action we have is really stemming out of our belief in our worship. And so how you think, and how you believe, and what you believe is the most beautiful and worthy of gazing at in your life will actually translate into what you do next. What your little moments every day are accumulating to be for a lifetime.

What we chat about:

  • Focusing on the beauty of what God has created vs comparing our lives to someone else’s on social media
  • At the root of dissatisfaction in our lives is an underlying struggle with identity. Is our identity found in Christ or is it found in everything going our way?
  • Growing our appetite for the things of God by choosing to fill our time with his Word.
  • The struggles women have with wanting to do something perfectly or not at all 
  • Celebrating the process of growing vs seeing immediate fruit in our lives
  • What you believe is the most beautiful and worthy of gazing at in your life will actually translate into what you do next
  • The goal isn’t just to experience God’s provision, but to trust that his presence in our lives is enough
  • “Nearness to God brings likeness to God. The more you see God, the more of God will be seen in you.” - C.H Spurgeon

Sep 02, 2019
Raising Worry-Free Girls :: Sissy Goff [Bonus]
24:05

For a variety of reasons, childhood anxiety rates are soaring, especially among girls. My guest Sissy Goff is here to share some of her insights on how to recognize worry and anxiety in your daughter and empower her to overcome.

We talk about tools we can use to help us understand why our brains are often working against us in times of anxiety and grounding techniques to slow and stop the emotional spiral that often ensues. 

“We always want her to know she's stronger than her worries and that she has a voice to talk back to the worry. A lot of people who work with kids call it the worry monster because that separates it out from her voice. We don't want her to think it's the truth, which is what kids are going to think when they have voices in their heads telling them things.”

This is a short, hope-filled bonus episode that just scratches the surface on all that we can learn about equipping our kids to work through anxiety. For more encouragement, follow Sissy and her team at https://www.raisingboysandgirls.com and watch for her book Raising Worry-Free Girls coming out September 17. 

 

What we chat about:

  • 1 in 4 kids are dealing with anxiety of some kind and girls are twice as likely to feel it
  • Anxiety is hard to recognize in kids. Sometimes it comes out as anger or meltdowns and other times it’s deeply buried
  • People whose personalities lean toward Type A tend to have baseline anxiety at all times. If your child’s personality leans that direction, it’s important to give them tools to deal with it
  • Anxiety is always an overestimation of the problem and an underestimation of ourselves
  • Techniques to help a child with anxiety calm down and redirect blood flow to their prefrontal cortex
  • Integrating our faith as we teach our kids to fight back against fear and worry
Aug 30, 2019
Adventures of a Boy Mom Monica Swanson Ep 254
52:34

Fellow boy moms, this episode is for you! This chat with Monica Swanson another mom of four boys and author of the new book Boy Mom dives into a lot of your questions about how to raise your boys to be godly men. 

We talk about encouraging strong friendships between brothers, teaching boys to be strong AND gentle, and about the importance of giving our sons ways to experience excitement and adventure while getting some of their natural aggression out in safe physical activities.

“I am a big believer that boys were made for adventure that they need to have some excitement in their lives I think is just how God wired them. They're little warriors who need to experience some thrills. A lot of the trouble boys can get into is related to when they're lacking authentic adventure, when they're not facing challenges and overcoming obstacles.”

Monica has two boys out of high school and two still in the nest, so she offers a lot of hope for those of us in the trenches of parenting to keep pressing into relationship with our sons and to make the practicals of faith an anchor in all that we do. 

“God is so big and so powerful and he can move mountains on behalf of your son. He wants your son's heart more than you even know. We get our boys plugged in everywhere we can. We want them to have so many positive spiritual models in their life that there's no denying that God is the best way to go. It about coming alongside them and saying, ‘This is for your best. God is for you. Let's walk this life with him.’”

 

What we chat about:

  • Monica’s four boys and working with very different personalities 
  • Building healthy brother relationships and dealing with kids who hit
  • Boys need to let out their energy with exercise and physical activity
  • Setting healthy boundaries for your kids with manners and learning to laugh with them about it too
  • Teaching boys how to balance strength and kindness by pointing them to the stories of godly men
  • The power of shoulder to shoulder conversations with boys and why to keep pressing into conversation with them
  • Motivating boys to get excited about school and finding hobbies and interests
  • Ideas for how to foster adventure for your boys and learning not to parent from a place of fear
  • Fostering faith in your sons through time in the Word, prayer and modeling
Aug 26, 2019
Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week Six Shontell Brewer
59:11

With the ability to connect with anyone, anywhere in the world, feels like we’re more isolated and ineffective than ever. But what if we worried less about making a big impact.  And focused more on doing the things in front of us with quality and depth?

I’m a big fan of this week's mentor, Shontell Brewer. She’s a wise mom to five kiddos. And she has an excellent sense of humor. More than that, she has discipled her children well to love and serve others around them.

Discipleship can be organic. Keeping your ministry small enough. To be present wherever God has placed you.

In this episode, which originally aired as Episode 140 (Oct 2016), Shontell and I talk about discipleship during dinner conversations. She shares her method of asking really specific questions. And giving her kiddos a challenge for the day to love others in tangible ways (e.g., encouraging a 4 year old to compliment his preschool teacher).

My most favorite thing we talk about is Taco Tuesday. The last Tuesday of the month, the Brewer family serves up meat & tortillas. They invite coaches, teachers, friends, neighbors (any one who interacts regularly with their kids) into their home.

 We love on our community one taco at a time.

I shared the idea with my boys and they wanted to do it the next night (“Taco Tuesday, but on a Monday”). I’ll let you know how that goes. We may go the Pizza Friday route (love our community one slice at a time).

Shontell also inspired me to help open my boys’ spiritual eyes. And to encourage them to fight over who is going to put the other one first.

What we chat about:

  • How women apologize for their carpet
  • Keeping your ministry small
  • Specific questions to ask during dinner time conversations
  • How Shontell helped her daughter minister to her Starbucks’ manager
  • Sending your kids to school with a basic challenge to bless someone
  • Setting the habit of conversation and other family “norms”
  • Learning to not be offended when our kids aren’t performing
  • Parenting small with intimate corrective conversations
  • The BEST idea to invite people into your home monthly–> Taco Tuesdays!

Aug 19, 2019
Summer of the Mentorship 2019 Week Five Lynn Hoffman
39:01

Being a mom reveals your most broken places.

I often think motherhood would be easy if my boys behaved better. Or maybe if I read one more parenting book. Or if I finally caught the magical contentment unicorn just beyond my grasp.

Of course, none of those options really pan out (especially the unicorn). It’s my own junk. Every day the yuck in my heart rises to the surface. But with the pace of life and needs of my people, it’s hard to stop and examine the “yuck” more closely.

Recently our small group has been attending a recovery program at our church. Through some honest self-examination and community, God’s been showing me where I’ve held wrong beliefs. And how they impact my relationships.

Today’s podcast guest, Lynn Hoffman, helped start our church’s recovery program 15 years ago. And God also led her to write “Steps into God’s Grace”, a bible study based on the 12 steps of recovery.

In this episode, Lynn shares her own struggle with performance, people pleasing and codependency. She gives insight into why recovery isn’t just for addicts. And she encourages us to identify our own emotions so we can teach our children to do the same.

Recovery became a safe place where I could go and be with other people who were willing to be honest. Stop pretending and start talking about the reality of the problems in their life. And lean on God to change and discover new realities in their life.

Aug 12, 2019
Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week Four Helen Smallbone
50:36

Ever want to hear from the woman behind rock star kids?

In this episode, Helen Smallbone, mother of 7 grown children including Christian music stars Joel and Luke Smallbone (For King & Country) and Rebecca St. James, shares stories of motherhood and practical advice she’s learned along the way. She and her husband moved their family from Australia to America more than 25 years ago. It was a faith-building journey that changed their family forever.   

“Sometimes when you face life crises what God’s doing is setting a new foundation. In this time, he took everything away from us,” Smallbone said. “We had no money, no resources, no family and no friends.  But in that refining process, he gave everything back to us, but with a new foundation where he was the provider. He showed himself to be faithful for providing all our needs.”

  • Stories of living by faith and God providing for the Smallbone family when they moved from Australia to America
  • Homeschooling a large family and fostering responsibility and work skills in your kids
  • Teaching family values while dealing with bad attitudes and behaviors in your kids
  • Taking a “time out” as a mom to pray for your children and waiting on the Lord for breakthrough for specific ways to resolve behavior problems
  • Focusing on the eternal value of building relationships with our kids versus the temporary focus on everyday tasks
  • Spending time with children who may be acting out because they need more attention
  • How quantity time often becomes quality time with our families
  • Taking a traditional naptime or quiet time after lunch with fill yourself up to finish the day strong as a mom
  • Keeping the communication line open with your children no matter their age.
Aug 05, 2019
Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week Three Kim Fredrickson
45:45

As a licensed marriage and family therapist and life coach, Kim Fredrickson counseled and taught others about self-compassion for years. When she received an unexpected terminal diagnosis of pulmonary fibrosis, a rare side-effect of the treatment she had received for breast cancer, she wrote a book to leave for her children on giving that same compassion to the grandchildren she will never meet.

On June 3rd, 2019, Kim passed on to be in the presence of her Savior. We are grateful for a way to honor her legacy by re-releasing her fantastic mentorship. (This episode originally aired in January 2018).

When people feel ashamed, they blame other people because they feel like if I really look at my shame then I’m going to collapse inside. That’s why self-compassion is desperately important because kids feel shame a lot. They fail at everything at the start.

What we chat about:

  • Kim’s story of receiving a devastating diagnosis after completing treatment for breast cancer
  • How she’s chosen to spend the years she has left with her family
  • The new book she wrote for when her children have kids called “Give Your Kids a Break: Parenting with Compassion for You and Your Children”
  • How it’s a process to develop a compassionate inner voice
  • Applying grace and truth to every situation in our lives
  • Variety of temperaments--some that are harder on themselves than others.
  • The difference between self-compassion and self-pity
  • Encouraging your children to practice self-compassion and reinforcing it by showing ourselves that same
  • Giving our kids the language to identify their failings and separate them from their self- worth
  • Moms have a really hard job. It’s ok to acknowledge that.
  • The importance of taking care of ourselves as moms
  • How to talk to your kids after you’ve been hard on yourself and reframing it with self compassion

Jul 29, 2019
Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week Two Lisa-Jo Baker
42:34

Oh friendship! A gift that can bring incredible joy and cause great pain. If female relationships weren't tricky enough, our wounded selves bump into each other causing even deeper hurts.

But what are we to do? How do we heal, move forward and develop lasting friendships?

Thankfully, my friend, Lisa-Jo Baker came on the show back in April of 2017 to help. With content from her book, "Never Unfriended", on episode 159 we talked about friendship wounds. And Lisa-Jo pointed us to Jesus, the only One who promises to heal and never leave us.

Jesus is never tired of me always needing Him. Instead, He is delighted by how desperately I need His validation and He never, ever withholds it from me. Or from you. - excerpt from "Never Unfriended" by Lisa-Jo

  • What do we fear most in friendship
  • How to include the new girl and ignore the "cool kid" lies
  • How to heal past friendship wounds.
  • Turning to Jesus for meat and potatoes soul filling.
  • Not blaming social media for our heart issues.
  • How do you survive a friendship break-up.
  • The hope of reconciliation and knowing when to let go.
Jul 22, 2019
Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week One :: Nancy Williams
40:20

The first guest in our mentorship series is Nancy Williams**. She is known by her 9 grandchildren & 4 great-grandchildren to label each family gathering as "the best ever". Her phrase perfectly summarizes this podcast.

The show first aired in February of 2014 (Episode 11) and was titled "Best Ever Life". Based on the title, you may be surprised to discover Nancy's motherhood journey includes many trials and heartache. But she views each challenge as an "opportunity" (her word) to see the power of God at work.

This interview is bursting with Truth and wisdom. Here's a brief summary of the topics we cover:

  • How to keep your thoughts and perspective in check when your husband works long hours.
  • Where to turn with your parenting questions.
  • How to respond when the consequences of sin enter your children's lives
  • How to share a simple family tradition of gratitude and love (fabulous idea!)
  • How to deal with mom guilt (a.k.a., the part of the podcast where I get emotional)
  • How to help your children turn to God when you can't meet all their needs.

SUCH good stuff.

I was most encouraged to hear this message from Nancy:

This can be the "best life ever", no matter the circumstances, if it includes eternal salvation for our children and unconditional love in our homes. 

Jul 15, 2019
Women Can Be All-In for Jesus Kat Armstrong Ep 253
52:20

Kat Armstrong, the guest from one of my most popular episodes is back on the podcast to share the message of her new book, No More Holding Back. The first question we talk about is, “Can a woman learn too much about Jesus?” A light topic, right?

“The greatest commandment says we have to love God with our heart, soul, mind and strength — all of it. And it's the priority. It's the priority over anyone's role in our home. We have to be all-in for Jesus. We can't let our fears, our insecurities, our roles, our titles, or anything to do with our spouses impede our progress to learn about Jesus.”

Kat shares powerfully about our role as an image bearer of God, the importance of elevating women’s voices in our communities of faith and living completely into the assignments God gives us.

We also talk about giving what we have to offer even if feels imperfect or broken in the same way that the widow in Mark 12 gave out of her need.

“If you have a broken heart, it counts. I have a broken heart right now about my dad. I still want to love God with it all and I don't have to have it all together or healed yet to apply it to the Great Commission. And if you have a weary soul and you're questioning your faith, you can give that to God and he counts it as worthy. If you have a confused mind. If you're struggling with anxiety, depression, decision making, and things don't make sense in your world, you can give that to God.”

Jun 24, 2019
The Ministry of Presence in a Broken World Tess Clarke Ep 252
57:22

After my recent trip to Oaxaca, Mexico, I’m so excited to introduce you to Tess Clarke. We process some of what we learned on the trip to visit refugees from Central and South America and hear about the work Tess and her husband are doing with their non-profit, Seek the Peace.

Tess feels called to a ministry of presence in the same way that Jesus enters into our lives. It doesn’t mean that the circumstances are changed, but He takes away our aloneness, our guilt, our shame and our fear by being present with us in those hard circumstances.

“The numbers are staggering and everyone knows that this is an overwhelming issue, which is why I think we can't become jaded and paralyzed, but we have to keep looking at it from a human point of view. When we were in Oaxaca, a lot of it was really about learning why people were fleeing and what their lives looked like and what they were hoping for when they came to the United States. Every person I had an opportunity to talk to said, I want to be safe.”

No matter where you may fall politically on the issues of immigration and the current refugee crisis, I think Tess’ perspective on entering into the broken places and loving the marginalized and lonely around us can bring us together as believers. It has made a big difference in my own parenting when I invite my kids into loving others.

“Something my kids and I talk a lot about is the line in the Lord's prayer, ‘Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.’ And we asked Jesus, show us where heaven is not. Show us where heaven is lacking. Lead us there because we want to join you in that space and we want to do what we can to bring heaven there.”

  • Tess, her family, their non-profit Seek the Peace and her role at We Welcome Refugees
  • The work Tess and her organization have done at the border.
  • Seeking to understand the plight of refugees and the work and role of U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE)
  • Family separation of refugees at the border and the humanitarian crises happening in Central and South America that are causing an increase in the number of refugees
  • Stories from refugee centers at the border of South Texas
  • Tess feels called to a ministry of presence in the same way that Jesus enters into our lives.
  • The trip Heather and Tess made to Oaxaca, Mexico to visit refugees there
  • A poem by Warsan Shire about why people leave their homes as refugees
  • The legal ways to enter America are being shut down by the current administration
  • Our experience visiting the unaccompanied minors shelter
  • Femicide, being killed because you are a woman, is a big cause of death in Mexico
  • Partnering with Jesus to love the marginalized and bring Heaven to Earth
  • The call of God to love the oppressed and care for the broken in Isaiah 58
Jun 17, 2019
Gospel-Focused Conversations Joel Fitzpatrick Ep 251
55:26

Just in time for Father’s Day we have a great conversation with Joel Fitzpatrick, a pastor and author, who encourages dads (and moms) to have gospel-focused conversations with their sons.

“There’s power in having conversations with your kids that opens up your relationship. It’s a freedom that gives your kids a safe place to talk to someone. But then it also gives you the ability to speak God's truth into their lives.”

We talk about the barriers that keep us from going deep with our kids and how to fight back against the fear and complacency that can become commonplace. Joel also shares how Jesus is the ultimate picture of biblical masculinity and how to be an emotionally safe parent for your son or daughter.

“We need to be very careful with our emotions when our kids come and they confess their sins to us. When your son comes to you and he's been angry, you need to be careful not to respond in anger, but to respond with love and with kindness and with using your strength to provide a place of safety.”

This is an episode that would be perfect to share with your spouse and the dads in your life. Joel shares a lot of truth for both moms and dads about how we can stay actively engaged with our kids and keep the gospel message at the forefront.

For more on this topic, Joel has a new book out called Between Us Guys. Also, my recent podcast with Vicki Courtney [Ep 239] has some more great information on having deep conversations.

As Joel shares, it comes down to setting aside intentional time to go deep with our kids. What step can you make this summer to have a gospel-centered conversation with your son or daughter?

 

What we chat about:

  • Joel’s background as a construction worker and as a minister
  • What are gospel conversations and how do we have them with our kids
  • How to fight against fear and complacency to continually engage with our kids
  • Biblical masculinity vs worldly masculinity
  • Working with a son who is displaying aggression and violence
  • Keeping our emotions in check when we’re having tough discipline conversations
  • Look at your kids’ lives as a timeline and not a snapshot
  • Learning to process emotions in a healthy way with our kids
  • Being aware of your sons’ emotions and actively engaged with how he is processing them
  • Teaching sons how to think about and interact with women in light of the gospel
Jun 10, 2019
Setting Healthy Boundaries with Family Dr. John Townsend Ep 250
49:33

As moms, we are like a life support system for our kids. To keep our families healthy, we need to be healthy. A key part of our overall well being is setting healthy boundaries.

But boundaries are hard. They require uncomfortable, direct conversations. We may need to put a limit on really good things or draw a line in the sand with our in-laws or parents.

My guest, Dr. John Townsend literally wrote the book on boundaries and he shares some deep wisdom on how to set healthy boundaries while honoring our family members and others.

You've got to take care of your energy, your heart and your emotions. You've got to take care of yourself and your health. If you don't guard that heart, then the wellsprings of life won't come out from it. Boundaries are basically about how to set healthy, loving limits in our life. So we have something to offer to our children.

Townsend answers your tough questions about set limits with in-laws, making healthy boundaries for the holidays and even models having a tough conversation with a parent about a boundary.

This is an episode packed with great information and Townsend has several books and resources available if you want to go deeper. Let’s make setting healthy boundaries a priority and guard our hearts and our time to bring life to our family!

What we chat about:

  • “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23
  • Setting boundaries is guarding our wellspring of life so we can love our kids
  • His book, Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life
  • Is setting boundaries biblical? YES!
  • The difference between hurting and harming someone when it comes to setting boundaries
  • Honoring vs obeying your parents as an adult
  • What it looks like to have a boundary setting conversation
  • Conveying love in hard conversations and not getting hijacked with emotions or blame
  • Giving three chances when you set new boundaries and how to have consequences when they aren’t respected
  • Turning to spiritual family when biological family isn’t what your kids need
  • Keeping the lines of communication open with grandparents and communicating boundaries in love
  • Looking for mild, moderate and severe reactions to suggestions and boundary setting
  • Suggestions for setting healthy boundaries for the holidays
  • The idea of people fuel and relational nutrients that help us fuel up

Jun 03, 2019
Summer Strategies Laura and Courtney Ep 249
51:58

Whether your kids are school age or not, summer typically brings a big shift to our family routine and to our mindset. Joining me today to talk through strategies to thrive this summer are Laura Hernandez and Courtney Cleveland.  

We talk about systems, tips and plans for making the most of the time you have with your kids this summer. Laura even shares an acronym for how to plan with the word ENJOY. That’s right! We can absolutely enjoy the summer and these ladies have some great ideas to get you started.

“It doesn't need to be a family bucket list and it doesn't need to be a hundred goals. It's just a simple focused looking at your summer and saying, what do I want it to feel like? What do I want it to look like for our family? And you will reap the benefits of it.”

If you’re like me and want to figure out a way to involve your kids in household jobs without the whining and complaining or make a plan for using screen time effectively, we cover it all in this chat. We also talk about summer road tips and ways to stop entitlement behavior when it rears its ugly head.

There is so much life in slowing down and spending time with our kids in the summer. Whether you are on summer number 2 or summer number 14 (like me) with your oldest, I pray that you embrace the time you have and ENJOY your summer!

 

May 27, 2019
You are Qualified in Christ
49:49

Jada Edwards is a Bible teacher and truth speaker. She brings the word with fire and conviction. Her words encourage and gently convict as she points others to God.

But, her story hasn’t always been pretty and her platform hasn’t always been large. She’s wrestled with shame and doubt and feeling unqualified.

“I try be like David when he says, ‘I keep my sin before me.’ Not because of shame, but because of that reminder that every time God uses me, every time someone is encouraged by something that comes out of my mouth, I think, God is good. He can use anybody. There's a fine line between feeling disqualified and just feeling grateful and humble. So I try not to let that send me into a place of immobility.”

I’m personally grateful that Jada is following after God’s call on her life. She has so much passion for teaching and preaching the word. She has a new Bible study series out with Zondervan on women in the Bible called Known by Name that focuses on the same three questions we all still ask today: How does everyone else see me? How do I see myself? How does God see me? Good stuff!

We talk about her journey to motherhood and how inviting others to be influences in our kids’ lives can bring a freedom for the places we are weakest. She has some great suggestions for how to not mom alone and why we don’t have to strive to be a mother that we’re not.

“I think I day-by-day I find my footing a little bit saying, ‘Okay, these are the kids God has given me to shape and I know there's going to be deficits. I know there's going to be gaps, but I'm going to trust the Lord for the gaps and I'm going to do what I can with who I am. I'm not going to try to be anybody else. I'm going to be a failure at trying to be like my mother, it's going to go badly. I can be the best mom that I can be. And then where I'm lacking, I can be honest about that.’”

May 20, 2019
Abuse Happens Every Nine Seconds Jan Langbein Ep 247
53:17

Every nine seconds a woman is assaulted in America. It’s the kind of staggering statistic that shocks you into silence. It can make you feel powerless to help.

When Jan Langbein first heard that statistic, it rocked her. She found an avenue to get involved with violence intervention and was eventually hired to run Genesis Women’s Shelter & Support in Dallas.

Now, she’s worked to end violence against women and children for more than 20 years. God’s plan for her was bigger than she ever dreamed. On the podcast, she shares from the wealth of what she’s learned about:

  • How to identify abuse in your own life and in others’
  • How to respond to a friend in an abusive relationship
  • What we can all do to work toward ending and preventing violence, especially in faith communities

“It's very hard being friends and family of someone who's being abused, because it's as if they are overcome by smoke. We see the house burning down, but they're tripping around in a house filled with smoke. So you say things like, you know what, when you are ready to talk about this, know that I'm going to be here for you. When you do feel like you ready for some resources, I'll have them for you.”

Warning: There are some very hard things to hear in this episode and some potentially triggering things if you’ve been in an abusive relationship of any kind.

I’m so thankful for Jan’s guidance and clarity on these hard topics. As believers, we’re called to press in to these uncomfortable places and be God’s hands and feet for women and children who are suffering. I pray you will listen with that in mind.

“I think God hates divorce. I know he hates abuse even worse. I think this makes God cry that women are not allowed to live the fullest life. We can serve others, but that doesn't mean at the risk of our own bodies and souls and our children's lives.”

 

What we chat about:

  • How Jan got involved with violence intervention and eventual hired to run Genesis Women's Shelter & Support
  • Every nine seconds, a woman is assaulted in this country and 1 in 3 women have experienced abuse
  • The ways abuse affects the children in a marriage/relationship
  • How to respond to a friend who may be in an abusive relationship
  • The services offered at a shelter like Genesis can provide for multiple needs from housing to legal help to counseling
  • Faith communities and other men can be a part of the solution calling out abuse and not sweeping it under the rug
  • Fear is an indication of abuse and verbal and emotional abuse precedes physical abuse
  • Helping a friend go through the stages of change in coming out of abuse
  • Abusers have the power and control in the relationship and the person being abused has the responsibility to serve their abuser
  • What to watch for in our kids for signs of abuse
May 13, 2019
Rebuilding from an Abusive Marriage Jeni B Ep 246
53:00

Jeni B is a single mom raising and homeschooling her four children. It was not the life she expected when she married as a young grad student and not the life she worked hard to create as she struggled for 10 years in an abusive marriage.

She shares her story of coming to a very painful place of seeking a divorce and fleeing with her children. We talk about the loss of community and friendships that followed and the guilt and shame that threatened to hold her captive.

“There can be so much shame and there's so much responsibility on the shoulders of the woman that it can feel like her job is to respect and to uphold and to encourage and that love covers a multitude of sins. And I'm sure that that works totally fine in a partnership where you've got two people under the headship of Jesus Christ who are wanting to please and obey him and serve each other. But when only one person is doing that, it just opens the gates wide for rampant abuse in a relationship.”

But her story did end there. Three years later, she is walking with God in a deeper way than she thought possible and finding freedom through healing. In her hardest places, God has been faithful and she shares what she’s learned about his character along the way.

“He didn't love my marriage more than he loved me. He loves me. So a huge part of my own growth and my own awakening is knowing God. It's a day-to-day walk and I feel the Lord shining on me. It is this beautiful experience of having been reduced to pretty much nothing and having all of my dreams destroyed to a place where God is building a city on top of that very same spot and he's using other people in the process of rebuilding.”

I’m thankful for Jeni’s openness in sharing her journey with God and how he is restoring and rebuilding her life. If you or a friend are going through anything similar, check out the online support group Jeni is in for more resources or visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline website www.thehotline.org.

May 06, 2019
Thriving as an Introverted Mom Erin Morgan Ep 245
33:03

I’m so excited to share my dear friend Erin Morgan with you in this episode! We go way back in friendship and in motherhood.

She is the introvert to my extrovert and in this chat we’re diving into how to thrive as an introvert mom. When she and I had younger kids, the constant togetherness of parenting was very draining for her.

“I was just completely overwhelmed, which causes me to withdraw and isolate big time. I just had no energy for other people. I wanted to pursue my friends and my relationships with other people, but there was just no margin for that in my mind.”

We talk about how she learned more about herself as she learned about the gift that introversion can be. As she asked God where she should invest her life, he encouraged her that focusing on motherhood and a few deep friendships was his best for her.

“I had to get with the Lord and be reminded that what I'm doing in this season of life with my children and my family is a true ministry and is where God has me. And I really felt like he was impressing on me this kind of motto for my life, which is that a small and faithful life is pleasing to the Lord.”

I’m so thankful for Erin and her introvert “super powers” of listening and passionate, faithful prayers. She is a thoughtful friend who has a lot of wisdom and encouragement for other introvert moms out there. Extroverts can learn a lot about their introvert friends by hearing what she shares too!

Apr 29, 2019
Budget Isn't a Dirty Word Ericka Young Ep 244
48:56

When Ericka Young and her husband made the choice to get out of debt, they had two small kids and $90,000 to pay off.

In the midst of the expensive, hard season of raising their daughters they worked hard for five years to get debt-free and now Ericka teaches the budgeting principles they used to help others find freedom. She believes that while many of us see a budgeting as restriction it can actually bring a lot of freedom.

“You can be creative if you want, you can call it a spending plan, you can call it a cash flow plan, whatever want to call it is totally fine. But when I say the word budget, everybody has a response, good or bad. And many times it's bad. It is the straight jacket. It's restriction, it's lack of freedom, that kind of thing. But here's the deal. It's what you make of it. Your budget is your own, make it your own.”

We chat about teaching our kids about money and tithing and how we are ultimately stewards of the resources God has given us.

“I love numbers. And so how I get out of my head is to realize that God is my provider. I am not the fixer of all financial issues. God is the provider. He also leads the way. And so when things come up and I have to shift or do a detour or what have you, I still know that he's in control. And so the budget is the guide. It's the plan. But when life happens, I also know that God's got this.”

What we chat about:

  • Her and her husband’s history with debt and money
  • Finances while you are raising young kids
  • Parental peer pressure can cause us to spend money we don’t need to
  • Why having a budget and money goals can help you get a handle on your finances
  • Having shared financial goals with your husband
  • Track your spending for the past three months and see if it aligns with your priorities
  • Plan for out-to-eat meals in your budget and use wisdom on when to eat out
  • Teaching your children about the costs of items and how to spend within limits
  • Being committed to tithing and how to discuss it with our kids
  • Responsibilities, allowances and working with kids on money
  • Why we need cushion in your budget for emergencies. It helps takes stress off an already stressful situation.
  • Your budget can bring freedom from the stress of not knowing where your money is
Apr 22, 2019
Preparing Now for Future Puberty and Masturbation Questions Megan Michelson and Mary Flo Ridley Ep 243
58:02

Depending on your personal background with puberty, sex and the often avoided topic of masturbation, having open conversations with your kids on these topics may feel daunting.

You may want to avoid it or get “the talk” over and done with as quickly as possible. Or maybe your kids are really young and you don’t want to think about it right now. My guests Mary Flo Ridley and Megan Michelson walk us through why starting early talking with our kids about body awareness and establishing our family story about sex is so important.

“What we're trying to get rid of is this idea that this is a one-time conversation in parenting. The world that we are raising our kids in has changed so drastically that the way we as parents talk about sex has to change drastically as well. We can have multiple age appropriate conversations and a little-by-little approach where we establish a conversation pattern where we are the loving authority in our child's life on this topic.”

They have great book recommendations and advice on talking with your pediatrician so you know when puberty is imminent for each child. We cover ways to pursue conversations with your kids and how to talk to them calmly without overreacting.

Finally, we dive into the deeper waters of talking to your older children about masturbation, dealing with our emotional baggage when it comes to sex and how to strike the difficult balance of teaching what is normal and beneficial.

We're hearing from a lot of youth ministers and pastors that work with college kids that this is an epidemic of a great addiction. So there needs to be more of a warning of how this is normal, but not beneficial. That why it's such a difficult topic. You can say, yes, honey, this is absolutely normal. You're learning about your body and how it works, but it can become a habit of comfort. And if this is where you go when you're upset or when you're angry, if this is how you comfort yourself, then this is not beneficial to you in your future.”

Apr 14, 2019
20th Anniversary Q & A Bruce and Heather Ep 242
57:19

To celebrate our 20-year wedding anniversary, Bruce and I are answering your questions! We have a fun time reminiscing on our wedding, the early years of parenting and all the twists and turns our lives have taken since we joined them together.

We talk about parenting styles, balancing our roles and how I learned not to micromanage him when it came to caring for our boys.

As much as we enjoy looking back at our years before kids when we traveled a bunch, the fun concerts we went to, and friends we made, we wouldn’t change what we have now. Bruce makes a great point that if we stay focused on the past, we’ll miss the great things happening now.

Stick around to the end of the episode to find out which one of us said, “I love you” first and my personal philosophy on procrastination. We share our ideas for a perfect weekend (they aren’t the same) and how Bruce plans a typical date night.

Apr 08, 2019
Beating 50 Percent Audrey Roloff Ep 241
51:35

Though millions tuned in to TLC’s hit show Little People, Big World to watch their wedding, the entirety of Jeremy and Audrey Roloff’s love story is significantly less known. Audrey joins me to talk about her marriage, motherhood, and how she and her husband are on a mission to help married couples thrive.

The Roloffs have founded a ministry called Beating 50 Percent which is focused on reviving covenant marriages. They share resources and ideas for couples to inspire them to make their marriages more than average.

“One thing that has been our lifeline since before becoming parents is our marriage journal. It's essentially our communication tool in our marriage. When life is crazy, we know that every Sunday night we're going to have our time to do our marriage journal. We call it our navigator’s council time. But it's basically just a time for Jeremy and I to connect and communicate about things that have come up in the week that maybe there wasn't never that good time to talk about it.”

We chat about how she’s balancing marriage and motherhood since the birth of her daughter, why it’s important to share interests and activities with your spouse and how to balance strong personalities in marriage.

“It’s important to take humble perspective and ask God, what do our roles in this marriage look like and is this something that you are pleased with and how can we be a better reflection of the gospel through our marriage? I feel like God has really been impressing on my heart since the beginning of the year to let Jeremy be my forerunner and to view that as a helpful, beautiful thing that helps me and allows me to run the race better.”

 

What we chat about:

  • Audrey’s background and how she met her husband Jeremy Roloff
  • Jeremy and his family are featured in the reality TV show, Little People, Big World
  • What it was like for her to have her wedding televised for the show
  • Her life verse from Ephesians 3:20 and mantra “Always More”
  • Beating 50 Percent the marriage ministry she and her husband have
  • Their focus is inspiring couples to invest more than 50% effort into their marriage
  • How she’s balancing marriage and motherhood since the birth of her infant daughter
  • Their Sunday marriage journaling time and how they’ve turned it into a book, The Marriage Journal
  • The principle of sharing interests and activities with your spouse and how that can knit you closer together
  • Submitting in marriage when you have a strong personality or leadership gifting
  • What Audrey loves about being a mom
Apr 01, 2019
The School of Dependency on Christ Wendy Speake Ep 240
58:52
Mar 25, 2019
Must Have Conversations Vicki Courtney Ep 239
01:05:04
Mar 18, 2019
Panic Attacks and Growing Trust JJ Heller Ep 238
51:33
Mar 11, 2019
Grace Based Discipline for Kids with Unique Needs Karis Murray Ep 237
56:56
Mar 04, 2019
Preparing Our Hearts for Easter Erin Moon Ep 236
52:37
Feb 25, 2019
Supporting a Friend with Cancer Marissa Henley Ep 235
53:30
Feb 18, 2019
Habits of a Healthy Marriage Paul David Tripp Ep 234
53:07
Feb 11, 2019
Cultivating Friendships in a World of Isolation Sally Clarkson Ep 233
50:44
Feb 04, 2019
The Enneagram and Motherhood Suzanne Stabile Ep 232
01:00:49
Jan 27, 2019
Praising Through the Pain of Physical Limitations Karen Harmon Ep 231
50:18
Jan 20, 2019
Shepherding Healthy Sleep Jenn and Robin Sleepy Cues Ep 230
55:57
Jan 13, 2019
Victory in Ministry and Motherhood Priscilla Shirer Ep 229
38:21
Jan 07, 2019
Not Alone in Shame Sheila Walsh Bonus
22:03
Dec 17, 2018
Not Alone in Overwhelm Kay Wyma Bonus
19:20
Dec 10, 2018
Reconciled Reconcilers Andi Andrew ep 228
47:49
Dec 02, 2018
Family Transformation Starts with Personal Revival KJ Perdomo Ep 227
50:12
Nov 26, 2018
The Anxious or Depressed Spouse Tommy Nelson Ep 226
42:31
Nov 19, 2018
New Mom Q & A Janay Wilborn Ep 225
52:36
Nov 11, 2018
Finding Your Voice Sandi Patty Ep 224
46:41
Nov 02, 2018
How to be Calm and Kind Under Pressure :: Candace Cameron Bure [Ep 223]
46:02

Candace Cameron Bure is an actress, producer, New York Times bestselling author, beloved by millions worldwide from her role as D.J. Tanner on the iconic family sitcoms Full House and Fuller House and of course Hallmark Channel movies. (Christmas is coming and she has a new one coming out Nov. 25)

But, she’s also a mom of three children ages 16 to 20 and an outspoken Christian in the entertainment industry. She shares what it was like to grow up working in entertainment and the values her parents passed on to her. And about how she walks out her faith now as a busy working actress, a career she returned to after choosing to be a stay-at-home mom for 10 years.

We talk about her new children’s book “Candace Center Stage” and how it focuses on the values of hard work and courage, especially for our strong-willed children.

As she takes us into her world, she talks through how she stays calm and kind under pressure and lives for Jesus as she juggles the roles and the callings God has put on her life.

Oct 27, 2018
Connected Relationships Jim Lynne Jackson Ep 222
01:02:45

For day two of Don’t Mom Alone Live, Jim and Lynne Jackson are back to talk all about relationships and answer listener questions.

If you’ve ever felt like a bad parent because of your child’s disobedience or struggle to referee the sibling arguments and fights in your home, this episode is for you! The Jackson’s share their Peace process and how to be confident before God in how you are parenting.

It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon. So we need to have confidence in our ability to be peaceful and not let this child’s behavior define me or tell me that I’m a bad parent. And have the long-term view that God can do anything in a child’s life as I persevere in encouraging and teaching and training.

They share great practicals for blended families and for how to navigate parenting when you and your spouse or co-parent aren’t on the same page. We also dive into teaching your children empathy and social cues as a way to foster great friendships.

In the end, our goal can be to equip our kids to be conduits of God’s grace to the world both through their relationships with others, but it starts with their relationship with us.

When I thought about that the kind of relationships in life that Jesus bought for our kids on the cross, not just with each other but whatever relationships they’d have. I just had this image of “trickle down grace” starting from the cross and just trickling down through us to our kids and then out to the world and our kids. We can grow to become profound dispensers of grace in life to others.

What we chat about:

  • Getting feedback about our kids that makes you feel like a “bad parent”
  • Keeping the long-view when you are training your children
  • There is a dramatic increase in anxiety and depression in children, teens and young adults. It is five to eight times greater than it was 50 years ago.
  • What to do when you and your spouse aren’t on the same page with parenting
  • Ask penetrating questions when your spouse is struggling to parent in kindness.
  • “What are you hoping our kids will learn right now?”
  • Blended family dynamics and how to co-parent well
  • You are building trust with your kids and when you are confident before God in how you are parenting, you can be at peace with how someone else is parenting
  • Ask kids: What do you want to tell me about how you’re feeling and how your time went?
  • Sibling rivalry and how conflict is an opportunity to teach our children how to reconcile
  • The Peace Process the Jackson’s teach: Calm > Understand > Solve > Celebrate
  • Celebrating that your kids reconciled is an important step to future success
  • When your kids feel encouraged and successful when working through conflict, you can see the momentum begin to change
  • Learning empathy as a family and equipping your kids to be more successful in friendship
  • Quick connects with individually with your kids can be more effective than playing with them for longer periods. Find ways to show that you delight in who they are!
  • Use mission trips and giving back to the community as your vacation/connection time as a family

Links Mentioned:

Oct 22, 2018
Discipline 101 Live Event Friday Night Jim Lynne Jackson Ep 221
01:16:28

For the first part of our 2018 Don’t Mom Alone live event, Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, joined me & my husband Bruce to answer listener questions about discipline and how to use their framework for biblically-based parenting.

We share lots of stories of how we have failed as parents and learned along the way.

But then I started to realize maybe my humility was my greatest currency for influence to help her learn the lessons and the values and the things that mattered most… Our kids need to know we’re not perfect. They need to know that we’ll come back to them and say, ‘Hey I blew it. I’m sorry. Would you forgive me?’ And get back to reconciliation in those relationships. — Jim Jackson.

So good!

Jim and Lynne talk us through the parenting framework they’ve developed and redefining how we view discipline with our kids. Ultimately, it comes down to connecting with their hearts and leading them to Jesus instead of trying to control their behavior.

We can help kids embrace the wisdom of the righteous. And that really prepares the way for the Lord to come in our family in a strong way. Because in today’s day and age with all the craziness that’s going on, these kids need a form of discipline that’s not just about punitive correction but that’s about a whole way of life that teaches our kids how to be followers of Jesus. — Lynne Jackson

And it’s not just vision for how we want to parent, the Jacksons also share some super practical tips and give us some ways to respond to our defiant, strong-willed or sensitive kids.

What we chat about:

  • The basis for Jim and Lynn’s parenting framework
  • How do you parent proactively instead of reactively when you feel like you’re just surviving minute
  • What is our goal in parenting? Is it immediate obedience from our children or fostering their ability to make wise choices?
  • Bringing God’s grace into our messy moments
  • Why connecting with God is so essential to how we parent
  • Go into a situation asking, “Lord, what is the opportunity here?”
  • Helping our kids build wisdom instead of feeling the need to express our disappointment when they mess up
  • Trusting that our kids really want to do better
  • Separating behavior from identity in our kids
  • Humility and apologizing well may be our greatest currency as a parent
  • The idea of a parent do-over
  • Tips for parents of younger kids and encouragement for parenting kids who bite or hit
  • We tend to think of behavior as either all good or all bad
  • When our goal is to control their behavior, it doesn’t build trust
  • You don’t have to be mean to be strong as a parent
  • Big, loud, and loving energy can make a big difference in the middle of conflict
  • Luke 1:17- “And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous—to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.”
  • Strong-willed kids and the importance of calling out their giftings and how God made them
  • Sometimes it’s sensitive and intense children are labeled as strong-willed
  • Psalm 73:21-24 “When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you. Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.”

Links Mentioned:

Oct 14, 2018
Calming Angry Kids Tricia Goyer Ep 220
50:19

Tricia Goyer is an author, speaker and homeschooling mom of ten. She also knows what it’s like to parent children with chronic anger. If you’ve ever felt alone in how to calm your “angry kid(s),” Tricia has a lot of wisdom to share from parenting both biological and adopted children.

In true Don’t Mom Alone fashion, Tricia and I answer several listener questions about how to respond in love and help kids of all ages process their anger and emotions. We talk about how much harder it is for the current generation of moms who have to factor in busier schedules, social media and more as a part of their children’s environments

My oldest is 29 and my youngest is 8. It is so much harder now. I feel like I’m on the second generation of kids. Now there is social media. There is more television. There are more video games. The access that they have to all these things brings so much anxiety and tension. Not only do they have to go to school, but then they would come home and see on social media that people were talking about them. It’s just so much more involved now even than it was when I had my first generation of kids.

But it’s not impossible! Tricia shares so many great practical tips and suggestions for how to help our kids (and ourselves) work through anger in a healthy way. But beyond all the tips, it all comes down to leaning into God and praying for the Holy Spirit to fill them that will make the biggest difference.

It’s really the Holy Spirit in them and the fruit of the Spirit is God in them that’s going to change them. I could try all these activities. You know, we could do calming bags or coping skills. I mean we do all the things too. But really it is God in them. And the more they lean on God and the more they depend on him that they’ll truly change.

What we chat about:

  • Tricia’s family, career and unique calling as an adoptive parent
  • Her new book, Calming Angry Kids
  • Determining if your child is struggling with how to process anger in a healthy way
  • Giving our kids time, attention and praise is a powerful antidote to anger
  • Everyone gets mad, what we do with the anger makes the difference
  • When they are in the middle of the emotions, it’s not the time to discipline them
  • Kids learn to apologize when we model it for them
  • Anger is often a secondary emotion from a deeper wounding like shame or feeling unloved or anxiety
  • Family schedules are busier than ever before and it heightens anxiety in kids and parents
  • Take time to process emotions with your kids and say “No” to more activities or events if they need a break
  • Tricia shares both how we can process our own anger and how to help our angry kids
  • The idea of an anger log to help track anger over time
  • Calming bags and items you can include in them
  • Give your kids time and space to calm down
  • Specific tips for pre-teens and teens and helping them with anger and hormones

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link. A small portion of your purchase will help produce this podcast.

Oct 08, 2018
Idols of Motherhood Elyse Fitzpatrick Ep 219
49:46

We’ve all been there. Your kid throws a fit in public and you feel the sting of embarrassment and the subtle lie that you aren’t a good enough mom. You fear what others will say and feel like the entire day is ruined in this one encounter.

My guest Elyse Fitzpatrick has lived in this place of fear and presents another way to view your worth as a mother — resting in the righteousness of Jesus. She shares about the very common and subversive idols of motherhood to slip in when we try to control our children’s performance.

But see that’s absolutely soul destroying because you either end up in fear and despair or pride and despair. That’s where you always end up when you’re living for your own righteousness. So in the days that I can lay down and in bed at night and say, ‘Yeah nailed it,’ then I am in pride.

If you’ve struggled to feel “OK” in your own power or have found your personal joy tethered to your kids’ behavior, this episode is for you. Elyse gives us the simple reminder that we have the power through Jesus to topple the idols in our life.

I began to understand this is really idolatry and I’m driving my kids insane trying to prove that I’m really an OK person. That I’m OK when they’re good and I’m a complete train wreck and bad and a loser when they’re not. But, when Jesus becomes who he should be in our lives, then idols lose their power to entice us.

What we chat about:

  • Elyse’s blended family structure and her son’s adoption
  • The balance of the disciplinarian and the more fun parent
  • Insecurity about our own faith and the lie of trying to control our kids
  • The danger of looking for identity in the way our kids behave
  • Looking for the places in our lives where we feel afraid, angry or worried as a barometer for where we aren’t believing God
  • Identifying idols in our lives and what they can look like
  • How our children make us look or feel in front of others can bring up anger in us
  • Elyse’s relationship with her mother and the background of her perceived need for control
  • When Jesus becomes who he should be in our lives, our idols lose their power
  • Not letting our joy be tethered to our kids’ behavior, or even our behavior
  • Our self-centered struggle to feel “OK” in our own power
  • How living for our own self righteousness leads to a soul destroying cycle of pride and despair
  • Resting in the righteousness of Christ and remembering we are forgiven

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link. A small portion of your purchase will help produce this podcast.

Oct 01, 2018
Do You Want to Be Well Susie Larson Ep 218
58:02

It’s all too easy slip into believing lies over God’s truth. My guest today shares that healing is possible and opens up about her personal healing journey from both physical and emotional abuse and chronic illness.

An author, radio host, and national speaker, Susie Larson, talks about how intertwined our emotional, spiritual, and physical health are. We talk through stories that are in her new book, “Fully Alive”, and she shares about some powerful experiences she’s had with the Lord.

“The Lord whispered through the chaos in my bathroom. The storms reveal the lies we believe and the truth we need. The enemy’s railing and saying I’m going to get you. I’ve got you by the throat and I felt like my throat was starting I could swallow and my esophagus was spasming. It’s just horrifying to hear the whisper again. Storms reveal the lies we believe and the truth who need.

There’s so much hope and truth in this episode for all of us who are believing for healing this side of heaven. For more inspiration from Susie, I highly recommend her book, “Fully Alive”**, which is available for pre-order right now.

What we chat about:

  • Susie’s experiences with abuse both physical and emotional
  • How our bodies hold onto trauma and hindrances to the healing process
  • Storms reveal the lies we believe and the truth we need
  • The idea of blessing guilt and surrendering to God for healing
  • The lie of learned helplessness and the truth that we’re not helpless with Jesus
  • Rejecting the lies of the enemy and addressing unbeliefs in our soul
  • Confronting the scar tissue of our past and the life that’s on the other side of it
  • God absolutely heals and it isn’t specifically a lack of faith that keeps us from receiving healing
  • Jesus entered in to other’s pain and suffering, that’s our calling too
  • The dangers of over medication and distraction that can keep us from being healed
  • The integral role of rest in the healing process

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link to help support the production of this podcast.

Sep 24, 2018
The Gift of Celebrating Biblical Feasts Amber Lee Ep 217
50:32

So much of the Old Testament in the Bible is devoted to the traditions and celebrations of the Jewish faith. It is all a part of the rich heritage that Jesus was born into and the prophecies he fulfills. As Christians, we often skim over the Jewish feasts and traditions and focus on the New Testament.

My friend Amber Lee shares why we should all consider celebrating one or more of the traditional Jewish feasts and how the rhythm of pausing and celebrating the Lord’s provision can be a life-giving practice for you and your family.

For me it’s a gift that the Lord continues to unfold. It’s like a dad saying, ‘Hey, here’s a way to live life better. Here’s something that is better for your soul. If you would just pause the crazy rat race that you’re running for just a minute, for just two hours, and talk with people that you love about what’s going on.’

We talk about the various feasts and about the practice of keeping the Sabbath. But, more importantly, we acknowledge that participating in these traditions is not about being a better Christian or another thing to put on your to do list. It’s really about intentionally pausing life to celebrate God and inviting others into that celebration.

And in each of the feasts, there’s this foreshadowing of bringing in the Gentile or bringing in the outsider. I think it’s just beautiful and the Lord saying it was always my intent to include everyone.

What we chat about:

  • How and why Amber started celebrating feasts
  • The biblical background of Jewish feasts and how Jesus interacted with them
  • It’s about pausing and celebrating how the Lord has provided
  • The names and differences between the various feasts
  • The way the feasts were meant to include outsiders and Gentiles
  • Learnings about Jewish traditions and observing the Sabbath
  • The Sabbath is really about pausing with intention and processing life with the Lord
  • All about the feast of Pentecost and how the layers of prophecy fulfillment enrich the understanding of all that Jesus did
  • How to start with Jewish feasts and tips for starting in small ways

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link to help support the production of this podcast.

Sep 17, 2018
Help Your Children Embrace Differences Dorena Williamson Ep 216
50:17

Many of us avoid and struggle with conversations about race or disabilities because it’s uncomfortable. When our children ask innocent questions about someone who is different than they are, it can make us feel tongue tied or embarrassed.

Author Dorena Williamson has created some lovely children’s books to help parents respond and invite their children to join them on the journey of learning to love and speak worth over every person that God created.

And I kept feeling frustrated thinking that’s not the solution to teach your children to be colorblind because that’s minimizing the beauty of God’s handiwork. And as Christians we should be the biggest proponents of celebrating the beauty of our racial diversity and not minimizing it or sort of washing it away and this colorblind land.

She shares powerfully about how to engage with your children about racial and cultural differences and how we can model what it looks like to grow in the area of loving and accepting people who are different than us.

As our children get older, I think that these are valuable conversations to have with them because the beauty of it is that it tells your children you are teachable and that you don’t get it right all the time and that you’re continuing to learn and grow.

What we chat about:

  • All about Dorena’s family and their multiracial church, Strong Tower Bible Church
  • Her book ColorFull and the background behind why she wrote it
  • The creativity of God and how he uses color in all that he created
  • Looking for opportunities to share the beauty of racial differences with our children
  • Language for parents to use to help teach children and avoid shaming
  • Reinforcing the idea that “Different is not bad” and calling out the worth of people
  • Why equipping kids early is important
  • Modeling how we are all growing when it comes to loving and accepting people who are different than us
  • Encouraging our children to ask questions even when they are uncomfortable
  • Engaging with our kids about other cultures whether we can travel internationally or experience cultures in our own cities

Other books/sites that Dorena recommends: 

**Amazon affiliate link to help support the production of this podcast.

Sep 10, 2018
Love and the Outcome Jodi and Chris Ep 215
49:42

Contemporary Christian musicians Chris Rademaker and Jodi King followed God’s call to pursue a musical adventure as the husband-wife duo Love & The Outcome. They share their experiences of selling their home, walking through grief, newlywed life on the road as musicians and their transition into parenting.

Jodi especially talks through how she leans on the Holy Spirit in her parenting, managing expectations and other people’s reactions.

I’ve had to learn how to just know the Holy Spirit. So in the moments when we’re in public and I’m parenting, I focus on Him. It’s so easy to turn and see everyone else’s reaction to what I just did was or I can just try and do my best to really listen to the Holy Spirit in the moment so that I can feel confident in my decisions.

I love how Chris and Jodi open up about playing shows and bringing their two young sons Milo and Ziggy along for the ride. There’s so much encouragement for moms of littles in this episode, including letting our standards slip a little so we can still experience community even if it’s messy and involves take-out food instead of handcrafted meals.

Maybe it’s just a season. But maybe it’s forever. I don’t really know what the Lord has. But letting go of some of my ideals has been so good. I have to acknowledge that I have a 2.5-year-old and a 1-year-old. Life looks like this right now, and it is the dream if I choose to be present to it and enjoy it.

What we chat about:

  • When Jodi and Chris met and started a touring band
  • Their Enneagram types and how they work together as a couple
  • How the Lord directed their path through grief and loss
  • Parenting and challenges that come when touring with kids
  • Dwelling in the Holy Spirit to make decisions
  • Transitions in parenting and learning to lean into the Holy Spirit vs worrying what others think
  • The concessions you make to connect with community when you are in a busy season
  • Freeing yourself up from pre-conceived plans of what life “should” look like
  • A new way to look at living the dream and choosing to be present in what your life is like now

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link to help support the production of this podcast.

Sep 03, 2018
Gay Girl, Good God Jackie Hill Perry Ep 214
01:02:58

It’s an uncomfortable and often controversial subject, especially in the church, but homosexuality and same sex attraction is something we all need to understand from a Biblical perspective. This week’s guest Jackie Hill Perry shares how the power of the gospel in her life rescued her from the sin she was living in as a woman with same sex attractions.

She not only brings us into her amazing story, but absolutely preaches the word of God and brings a lot of clarity to what can feel like a gray area for many Christians.

My conscience would not allow me to shake the truth that Jesus died for sin and that he is not pleased with sin at all. So I tried my best to shake him and I couldn’t…And I felt God speak to my heart and say that my girlfriend or my sin would be the death of me. That the wages of sin equals death. Because I saw it wasn’t my girlfriend or my lesbianism alone. It was that my entire life would be the death of me.

Jackie shares stories and insights from her new book Gay Girl, Good God. She also answers listener questions about how to share God’s love with LGBTQ friends and family by treating them as a whole person and keeping the gospel centered on God’s truth and not culture’s.

 

Aug 27, 2018
Adopting Special Needs Alice Candace Ep 213
01:00:47

Often the hardest assignments in our lives bring us the greatest good. I’ve seen it to be true in my own life. And have walked this Truth with friends on their journeys. 

In this episode I’ve invited my friends Alice and Candace to share their stories of adoption. And the process of discovering their adopted children have special needs. We also discuss how God has led them each into new ministries because of the children He’s brought into their families. 

I love seeing God’s purpose for Alice & Candace unfold alongside their leaning on Him for strength and guidance. Not to mention how they follow Him obediently with humor and grace!

I don’t know if God made Millie have autism or if that is a result of living in a fallen world. That’s something that I question every day. But I do know that the struggles that she has had more than anything else have shaped our family in a way that I think brings glory to God, more than the easy and fun and good things.–Alice

Aug 20, 2018
Opportunity vs Disruption Paul David Tripp Ep 212
01:06:43

In the thick of parenting it is easy to get our perspective skewed or react to our children from a place of emotion or our own sin. My guest Dr. Paul David Tripp gives a course-correcting pep talk reminding parents of their deep calling from God and how to look at discipline as an opportunity to connect our kids with God’s goodness.

“You’re never just dealing with behavior. You’re always dealing with what controls the child’s behavior and that’s his heart. And if God consciousness doesn’t rule my heart, self orientation will. That’s what has to change. No I can’t create that change, but I can I can give God’s Spirit an opportunity again and again to work in the heart of my child”

Tripp  is a pastor, international event speaker, and best-selling author. As a father of four grown children, he shares candidly from his own experience. This encouraging episode is packed with a lot of truth! Share with your spouse and friends!

What we chat about:

  • The deeper calling of on our lives as parents
  • We cannot rely on our kids to give us hope for parenting them.
  • How opening our children’s eyes to see God everywhere pulls them away from a self centered existence.
  • God created the world so that it’s very physical nature reveals him.
  • Root the rules that you have for your children in God’s goodness and his love and His grace.
  • Every opportunity we have to discipline or correct is not an opportunity first to threaten  with punishment but to talk about how good God is.
  • Ask the question, “What is God wanting to do in the heart of this child?”
  • Behavior is really about a child’s heart orientation
  • God way of parenting isn’t efficient, but it is transformational  .
  • The values of the world push against our calling as parents. We have to consider where we are placing our treasure and hope.
  • A God perspective for how to respond when your children sin
  • God is exposing something in my child so I can be part of his help and rescue.
  • Parenting is about planting seeds. We aren’t going to see them bloom overnight.
  • Dealing with rebellion and authority issues with grace and consequences
  • Parenting adopted children and helping them with identity
Aug 13, 2018
Help To Read Truth Every Day Raechel Myers Ep 211
53:47

In a time when biblical truth is often narrowed down to a greeting card slogan or a small subset of feel-good encouragements, the She Reads Truth community takes a different approach. The bible studies and reading plans from She Reads Truth take a deep dive into scripture with the goal to understand the big picture of who God is throughout history and our need for his grace.

SRT co-founder and CEO Raechel Myers shares the community’s origin and her personal story of encountering God’s goodness amidst the loss of her daughter. Jump in to hear Raechel share her heart for studying scripture and relying on the Holy Spirit in the difficult places of parenting.

I can base my understanding of God on the 36 years that I’ve experienced with him, but that is a mistake. God’s story is so far back before I ever existed. And so one of the important reasons that we read the Bible is to understand the broader story of who God is and how I fit into his story, not how he fits into mine.

What we chat about:

  • Raechel’s writing background and the purpose behind her first blog
  • How God trained and equipped Raechel through various experiences before She Reads Truth began
  • The origin of the She Reads Truth community
  • Taking God’s word for what it is and not relying too heavily on devotionals or feel-good scriptures alone
  • She Reads Truth has options for everything from free reading plans to beautiful, bound books
  • A new children’s story book they’ve produced called This Is the Gospel
  • Addressing faith and trusting that God is who he says he is with your older kids
  • Why scripture plays such a key role in our understanding of who God is beyond our own experience with him
  • The importance of modeling Christian life for our children’s spiritual formation
Aug 06, 2018
Bonus Mentor Episode--Sibling Conflict :: Jim & Lynn Jackson
57:19

“They just keep fighting!”

Summer, for us, means lots of unstructured time together as a family. Which is great. . . until it’s not.

Perhaps you can identify. Maybe you see yourself in one of the following situations:

Situation #1 – The kids are fighting – again! The harder you try to make it stop, the worse it seems to get – and the kids seem more and more resentful.

Situation #2 – One minute they love each other and the next minute they’re arch enemies. The older they get the louder and angrier it gets. You hate the way this affects everyone’s mood, including your own.

Situation #3 – Time-outs, required apologies, and firmness temporarily curb the fighting, but it soon comes back with more intensity.

Situation #4 – Your young kids are beginning their rivalry and you worry where it’s heading if you don’t learn some better strategies.  (copied from Sibling Conflict Online Course description).

Jim & Lynne Jackson from ConnectedFamilies.org are back to equip us in training our children to solve conflict well. And instead of just wishing they would “just stop fighting”, to recognize the gospel work of guiding our family to reconciliation.

Jim & Lynne have been on the show before sharing their fabulous 4-layer framework for discipline that connects (Listen here to Episode 80 & 81). And again helping connect in any situation (Ep 98). And recently helping us work with our kids on all of our entitlement issues (Ep 200)

Today, they are talking us through The Peace Process. A simple but effective way to guide our kids to a lifetime of reconciled relationships. Here’s their great graphic with the four steps moving us from “crazy mountain” to peaceful reconciliation (Click here to print your own copy):

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Conflict is inevitable. Instead of just getting frustrated and annoyed, I’ve found having a plan to reconnect hearts and train empathy so helpful. I also loved all the phrases Jim & Lynne modeled to use as we guide our children through the process. Here are some of my favorites (I’ll be bookmarking this page and referring to often):

  • “Sounds like y’all are having a hard time. Do you need my help or are you able to work it out on your own?”
  • “Solving brains won’t work until we’re calm. Why don’t we each find a comfortable place. How long do you need? 5 min? 10 min? Then we’ll come back together to work this out.”
  • “Did you hear that? How does she feel? Do you like that what you did made her feel that way? You two are listening to each other. How does that feel?”
  • “Your big feelings are a gift. And they are an even greater gift with you can use them to help understand other’s big feelings.”
  • “What’s going on? What was important to each person? How have you solved this problem before? Would you like to think of ways to solve the problem or do you want me to help give you choices on how to solve it?”
  • “Are there four things you could say that are kind and true about that person?”

Lastly, if you need more help learning how to guide your kiddos through the peace process, check out Jim & Lynne’s new SIBLING CONFLICT ONLINE COURSE. I’ll be working through it this summer. Join me!  

What we chat about:

  • Considering your own baggage/sibling situation as you rush into your kids’ conflict.
  • Are we trying to get conflict to stop or teach reconciliation?
  • The four steps to “The Peace Process”. 
  • A real life example of applying peace process.
  • How training in reconciliation helps our kids in their future marriages and relationships.
  • Helping our kids learn how to solve the problem of the conflict (a 3-step process).
  • A scenario of a more empathetic child in conflict with a more strong-willed child–growing specific skills in kids.
  • Addressing the differences in your kids outside of conflict.
  • Help for the mom who has a child with special needs in the sibling mix.
  • Connecting with others based not on experience but emotion.
  • Tips for conflicts that happen right before you have to leave the house.
Jul 30, 2018
Summer of Mentorship 2018 Jen Wilkin Wk 6
47:19

You desire your children to walk with God. But how do you lead them to that place?

Is that only your husband’s job? What if you are a single mom or functionally single mom?

What about your role as a leader in your faith community? Should women leaders be gentle and quiet?

Today’s guest is Jen Wilkin, author of “None Like Him” and “Women of the Word”.  She debunks some myths we believe about spiritual leadership, inside and outside of the home.

Her desire is for women to be grounded in the truth of God’s Word. To study with both their hearts and their minds. To know God and who He is. Then from knowing Him and His character see how He crafted us uniquely and our high worth in His eyes.

In this episode Jen and I chat about spiritual leadership. How we can expand the definition of what we think that means. How leading our children changes over the years. How her own single mom prayed fervently for her and for God to grow big in her life.

We also discuss how to be a spiritual leader in your community. How to manage that responsibility with humility and boldness. And how women need to not just see cute Instagram posts but know who God is from His Word.

What we chat about:

  • Jen’s young mom journey with three kids in four years.
  • The need for accountability and structure in studying the Bible as a young mom.
  • How the Wilkins describe leading children spiritual–the differences over the years.
  • Tips for the woman who is spiritually leading her children.
  • Expanding the definition of “spiritual leader” in the home.
  • Jen’s journey of spiritual growth having a single mom.
  • Self-reflection asking “Am I stepping on people? Limiting the contribution of others?”
  • How to be a woman in spiritual leadership/ministry.
  • What do you do if women think you are more “spiritual” than them.
  • How to be grounded in theWord and not cute, Instagram posts.
  • What does it mean that God is transcendent.

Links Mentioned:

Jul 23, 2018
Summer of Mentorship 2018 Dr. Peggy Banks Wk 5
47:55

“In this world you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Pain is inevitable. In James we are told to “consider it all joy” when we encounter trials. James also wrote to ask God for wisdom and He will give it generously. Which I realized from a sermon this week has more to do with wisdom we gain from the challenging circumstances, not necessarily wisdom to get out of them.

But how many of us share our broken places with others? How often do we wait until the pain has passed and life is back to “normal” to share and minister to others? What if God longs for you to offer up the wisdom you are gaining in the midst of the challenge?

This week’s guest is Dr. Peggy Banks (Global Ministry Director for TWR Women of Hope). I’m a big Peggy fan. Years ago she discipled me in a deeper understanding of God and His Spirit in me. She modeled how to pray intimately with my heavenly Father. She taught me all the Spirit does in and through us. She inspired me with her passion for women around the world to know the healing available through Jesus Christ.

In this episode Peggy shares her own painful places. A past that includes abuse. A journey of learning to trust and stop striving in performance. She encourages us to meet with Jesus daily. And what that looks like for her. Peggy encourages us to gather with others in small groups to spur each other on in our spiritual journeys. Sharing what He is doing and lifting one another up in the process.

Peggy was a minister of Spiritual formation at my church for years. And now she leads a global ministry to women, TWR Women of Hope. God is using her pain for a purpose. Every day women around the world are hearing the gospel in their own language through the power of the airwaves. As a podcaster, I’m so inspired by the work of Women of Hope and Trans World Radio.

“As a small Army-surplus transmitter went on the air in Tangier, Morocco, in early 1954, the first step had been taken toward the development the world’s largest evangelical media organization” – Trans World Radio

Such a cool idea to realize the gospel has been traveling via airways since the 50s. What a joy to join Him in the work of spreading the good news!

What we chat about:

  • Peggy’s hidden pain while looking perfect on the outside and performing for approval.
  • The “spiritual mom” who helped Peggy get healing from the bondage and brokenness of abuse.
  • Learning to vulnerably share your struggles with those you are leading.
  • Advice for the listener who is in the middle of the painful place.
  • What does it mean “to be with Jesus”.
  • Gathering together with a group to be real and share your current pain.
  • How Peggy’s tattoos helped her minister to a specific group of women.
  • Peggy’s personal mission statement: “Helping hurting women around the world helping to find hope and healing in the person of Jesus Christ.”

Links Mentioned:

Jul 16, 2018
Summer of Mentorship 2018 Kristen Hatton Wk 4
48:53

Teens. Toddlers. Moms.

No matter the age. We all struggle to remember (or know) the truth about who God says we are. And our position in Christ.

When we forget, we let friends, circumstances, or lies feed our souls with identity. And that takes us down the path of uncertainty,  harmful activities and a broken path.

Thankfully, today’s guest, Kristen Hatton, helps “Get Your Story Straight”.

When her daughter was in 6th grade, Kristen started teaching her and a group of friends truth from the Bible. Unfortunately, there weren’t a lot of great resources available for preteens/teens. So she used notes from her husband’s sermons and wrote her own Bible study. (click here to check it out)**

In this episode, Kristen and I talk about the struggle for our kids to know how “justification” applies to daily life. (And define what ‘justification’ means).

We also chat about how to help teens navigate the challenges of social media. And Kristen vulnerably shares her daughter’s battle with an eating disorder (which began with internalizing social media posts).

Lastly, Kristen helps us start to keep communication open with our kids. So when they are teens they will keep talking. I’m in the stage with lots of little people all trying to be with me and talk to me (at the same time). But after three blinks I’ll have a home full of teen boys. The time I spend listening now will impact how much they talk to me in the future.

Very thankful for the help, perspective and wisdom from Kristen. Now I can see the teenage years as an age of opportunity not a season to be feared.

What we chat about:

  • How quickly our kiddos grow into teenagers.
  • How Kristen saw a need for good bible study materials for teens.
  • Helping our kids be anchored in who God says we are (not who their friends on social media says they are).
  • Importance of teaching our kids the concept of justification.
  • When the world is measuring perfection and performance but we know we are only perfect in Christ.
  • How to communicate worth and identity to our kids.
  • Why teens stop talking to their parents.
  • Listening and asking probing questions.
  • Responding with grace instead of condemnation.
  • How internalizing social media posts led to her daughter’s eating disorder.
  • How boys struggle with social media.
  • How Kristen talks to her kids about the impact of social media.
  • Talking to your sons & daughters about pornography. Keeping an open conversation.
  • Reorienting your kids to the message of the gospel, moment-to-moment

Links Mentioned:

Jul 09, 2018
Summer of Mentorship 2018 Jan Greenwood Wk 3
42:31

No matter the battleground . . . Marriage challenges. Child struggles. Health trials. Overwhelming circumstances. How do you maneuver the daily attacks that rob your joy and peace?

This week’s mentor is Jan Greenwood, author and pastor of equipping at Gateway Church in Southlake, TX. In 2009, Jan was diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer. After the first battle, she experienced years of healing. Then four days shy of her 6 year recovery anniversary, cancer resurged in her body.

In this episode, Jan shares what God’s taught her about waging war. And how the football term #squareup impacted her battle strategies differently from the first and second time she fought cancer. Jan shares what it means for her to rest and let God fight for her. And encourages each of us to get a word and direction from the Lord for our unique situations.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from this episode:

This time my mindset has had to become one of agreement and not one of opposition. And squaring up is not about being steadfast in the Word of God, but its really about can I square up in such a manner that I can look at Jesus and trust Him.

I’m not very brave and not very strong. When I’m weak there’s a strength that shines through. And when I’m afraid, He makes me courageous.

I know how to fight but I don’t know how to rest.

What we chat about:

  • How God spoke to Jan at the news of cancer’s resurgence.
  • How Jan found comfort in her son’s football word “square up”.
  • The difference between how Jan has fought cancer the first time and the second time.
  • What “square up” means for her in this season.
  • The story behind the hashtag Jan uses: #bravestronggirl.
  • How her battle with cancer impacts her mothering.
  • Jan’s desire to get women to war together instead against each other.
  • The revelation to choose life and not succumb to death.
  • What rest looks like in Jan’s every day.
  • How you need your own word and direction from God.

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon Affiliate Link

Jul 02, 2018
Summer of Mentorship Week Two Chrystal Hurst
43:54

Chrystal is a real life friend. And one wise woman. Since this episode went live three years ago, she’s become. . .a grandmother to two adorable kiddos! But I’ll give you a tip. . .before you call her Granny. . . Chrystal prefers the title “MMC” (aka, “Mother of the Mother of the Child” ;).

In twelve years of parenting I’ve learned a thing or two. I’ve gained confidence in my ability to handle high fevers, distinguish between a backhoe digger and a tractor, and (somewhat regularly) plan weekly meals.

But most days I feel just as clueless as my first day home from the hospital.  When I sat on the closet floor cried buckets while cradling a screaming newborn. And had no idea how to stop either of our tears.

These days it’s sibling arguments I fear may rival world wars. Or strong wills that no military force could conquer. Or the noise, chaos and never-ending mess that leave me feeling like a pair of dirty socks in the spin cycle.

But I have one strategy that always helps. . .

Asking moms who’ve gone before me for perspective. Showing me what matters and what doesn’t. Helping me navigate these days with faith and grace.

On today’s podcast I’ve invited Chrystal Evans Hurst, mom to five to fill our mom hearts with nuggets of truth and wisdom.

What we talked about:

  • The realization Chrystal had when she turned 40
  • What Chrystal wants to make sure every mom knows
  • The parenting advice Corrie Ten Boom gave Chuck Swindoll
  • How to handle the shame or blame from those around us
  • How to grow in confidence as a mother
  • How to help and give grace to new moms
  • How knowing the commonalities between ages 2, 12, 20 helps you parent better
  • How to be the compassionate counselor to your children
  • How to calmly set boundaries and appropriately direct emotions
  • What God can accomplish and inspire you through prayer
  • The impact of how your face communicates acceptance
  • Three final tips Chrystal wants moms to know

Links Mentioned:

Jun 25, 2018
Summer of Mentorship Wk 1 Sheila Walsh
40:26

Our first featured mentor is the fabulous Sheila Walsh!!

“God had no grandchildren. He only had sons and daughters. Faith is something you have to choose for yourself.”

Those words started Sheila Walsh on a journey to know God and His love for her. From the tragic death of her father to professional success as 700 club co-host to discover freedom and peace in a psychiatric ward, Sheila shares a bit of her beautiful broken story.

“Suffering can be a gift from God. Because it really draws you closer to His heart. And a greater understanding that it’s never about me getting it right its about Christ who came to make everything right.”

This may be a “top ten favorite” interview for me. I’ve been a fan of Sheila and her work for years. But her wisdom and God’s grace in this episode ministered to me in a way and time that I needed most. Resonating with my soul that “through the broken places Christ’s love is closest to us.”

We also talk about fun ways to share the good news of God’s Word with your kids. How to keep the conversation open and allow our kids to ask hard, unanswerable questions. To give them the freedom to speak truth and know it doesn’t change God’s love for them.

What we chat about:

  • Sheila’s incredible testimony
  • How brokenness is where God brings His love to us
  • The story behind “Gigi, God’s Little Princess” series
  • Fun ideas of how the Walsh family did “devotion time”
  • Allowing our kids to be free to speak truth and ask hard questions
  • Her latest book in “The Bible is My Best Friend” series to help lead your child to Jesus

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon Affiliate Link

Jun 18, 2018
The Legacy of a Calm Father Kirk Martin Ep 210
58:13

We’ve talked a lot about calm parenting techniques on GCM in the past. It’s something many of us moms have seen work. But this episode is one you may want to listen to and invite your hubby to as well!

Founder of Celebrate Calm, Kirk Martin, shares the powerful story of how he went from an angry, tough dad to a calm, coaching dad and why a dad’s role in parenting is so important.

I believe this to be true most of the time. If you do not change and if you do not forge that connection with your son, most of those boys will grow up and become angry young men… And I would tell the men too if you have a daughter and if she doesn’t know that you like her. And that you accept her as she is even if she is difficult. I guarantee when she gets to her teenage years she’s going to seek a man’s affection in some teenage boy.

What we chat about:

  • Getting dads onboard with Calm Parenting techniques.
  • Working with strong-willed children and how anger and tough punishments don’t work.
  • Fear of failure as a parent is a strong motivator for us in discipline.
  • Kids need to know that we can control ourselves as parents even when they are out control.
  • Discipline means to teach, not to punish.
  • It’s important to build trust with our kids so they know we have their best interests at heart.
  • The idea of first-time obedience and whether it’s Biblical.
  • Strong-willed children may never listen the first time and may do things their own way (but still obey).
  • How our struggle to obey God often mirrors our kids’ struggle to obey.
  • Leading our kids to contrition instead of demanding an apology.
  • Coaching and role playing with our kids to teach them how to respond better in emotional situations.
  • Think of calm techniques as a different tactic for problem solving. 
  • It’s ok to give in from time to time to keep from going crazy (not the same as being “soft”).
  • Try doing the opposite of what you are doing now and see what the response is.

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link

Jun 11, 2018
Which Type of Rest Do You Need Saundra Dalton-Smith Ep 209
57:16

As moms, we know we need rest. We usually equate rest with sleep or with a vacation, but this week’s guest shares a broader picture of our need for rest in multiple areas of our lives.

Saundra Dalton-Smith is a medical doctor, wife and mother to two boys. She had everything she’d dreamed of and worked hard to achieve, but wasn’t enjoying it.

I kept pushing and pushing myself till I got to the point where I literally burned out. I wasn’t happy with my job. I couldn’t see how my marriage would survive. I didn’t want my kids anymore. I was just at the end of myself. I didn’t want the life I created.

After reaching this breaking point, she went on a journey of restoration and healing where she learned to connect with God and with his plan for rest. Now she shares her research and methods with her patients and with all of us. If you’ve ever felt tired and at the end of yourself, this episode is for you.

We already have permission to rest, but the mommy guilt that sometimes comes tells us we don’t. That is really a lie. I look at it as the John 10:10. ‘The thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy.’ And he’s doing it to a lot of us through our inability to rest, our inability to trust God that when we lay things down that he is able to uphold them.

What we chat about:

  • When Saundra reached her breaking point from stress and lack of true rest
  • We have physical limits to what we can do as moms
  • How Saundra researched rest and looked at scripture for clarity on how God rested
  • The seven types of rest: physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, social, sensory and creative.
  • The difference between a vacation and resting
  • Paying attention to a place that feels painful in your body in the moment vs ignoring it
  • Finding emotional rest through connection with friends, even through video chat if getting together is impossible
  • The importance of authentic, open friendships with women who can relate to your life situation
  • Ideas on how to stay engaged with your husband and reignite your marriage
  • Putting limits on social media time so that your mind has down time
  • Tips for getting mental rest and release ideas that make your mind race
  • Sensory rest– what it is and ways to get it
  • It is not selfish to prioritize resting. It keeps you from having a toxic reaction to those around you.

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link

Jun 04, 2018
Time and Space for Flourishing in a Tech World Andy Crouch Ep 208
56:48

In a world where devices, video games and screen-based entertainment dominate our time and space, we can choose to make our family culture different. It isn’t easy and it isn’t always fun, but there are huge benefits for us and our kids when we take time away from devices.

This week’s guest Andy Crouch is the author of “The Tech-Wise Family: Everyday Steps for Putting Technology in Its Proper Place”. He shares about our calling to be image bearers of God and how his family has seen a lot of growth by putting limitations on time with technology and building in Sabbath rest from devices.

Have moments as a family where you talk about what have been your best moments. What’s been the flourishing moments in our family? It’s very unlikely people will say, ‘Oh that time we made it to level 16 in whatever video game.’ Kids and parents will remember moments that had this kind of real authority and real vulnerability.

As we head into summer, I hope this episode encourages you to embrace the power of your kids being bored so they can tap into their God-given creativity, abilities and interests. Just hang in there through the first third of the time! Listen to see what I mean.

What we chat about:

  • Image bearing as it relates to authority and vulnerability
  • Video games and screened-based entertainment simulate authority and vulnerability
  • Andy’s family’s Sabbath for screens and devices- one hour each day, one day each week and one week each year
  • How to work toward unity on device- and technology-free time with your spouse
  • Start small and do what’s stretching when it comes to taking time without devices
  • Talk as a family about the best times you’ve experienced together and plan to have more of those moments
  • The first third of the time is really hard, but in the second two-thirds you’ll see creativity and really good things for your family
  • Changing your physical space to make the main thing we do together different
  • Work and rest vs. Toil and leisure
  • Not looking at your phone first thing in the morning till you’ve been outside
  • Having a rhythm of disengagement with technology that reconnects us with real rest and with who we really are in God’s image.

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link

May 28, 2018
Parenting in the Digital Age Ashley Januszewski Ep 207
01:07:03

Our children are growing up in a digital age with unparalleled access to technology. With these wonderful advances, comes a heavy responsibility we cannot ignore as parents. The access to pornography and sexual images and videos is everywhere and the age of children viewing them is going down.

But there is hope. My guest Ashley Januszewski is all about empowering parents to protect their children by talking candidly with them about God’s plan for their bodies and sex from an early age. We talk about everything from sexting and pornography to device control and screen time limits. She shares great resources for how to start these conversations with your children at any age.

It’s our job as parents, though this is the reality. Not to throw our hands in the air. It is our responsibility just like it is to buckle our children when we get in the car. So it’s our responsibility to virtually buckle up our children…. It’s everywhere. So it starts and ends with training the heart and equipping our kids. What to do when (not if) they are faced with this avalanche of filth. What do we do? We’ve got to talk about it.

What we chat about:

  • The story behind Ashley’s pursuit of information on parenting children in the digital age
  • Eleven is the average age for exposure to pornography in America.
  • Fear and anxiety can be signs that a young child has been exposed to something sexually inappropriate.
  • The coming of age experience today in 2018 looks radically different than what we experienced as kids.
  • There aren’t the natural barriers that used to exist to pornography. Now it is anonymous, accessible and affordable to anyone.
  • Our responsibility as parents to minimize exposure to pornographic material
  • 40 percent of teenagers today in America say that sending sexual or naked photos or videos is part of everyday life for them.
  • Make a plan for when and how you will introduce digital technology to your children
  • A family mantra or mission statement can help you stay centered on the truth of God in a world that is dominated by opinions
  • How screen time is affecting kids’ brains and hours spent on screens by tweens and teens
  • Teaching young children about the dignity and value bodies which can lead to wider conversations
  • Humanizing explicit images and an example of how to talk to your kids when you encounter them
  • Avoiding shame or blame when it comes to sexual images to keep the lines of communication open
  • Solutions for an Internet safer home- control the location of devices, control at the router and control on the devices
  • Sexting and child pornography laws and the importance of reporting

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link

May 21, 2018
Overcoming Barriers to Sexual Intimacy Nancy Houston Ep 206
56:38

*Earbud warning…may want to listen without innocent ears hearing as well. 😉

This episode is about having great SEX with your husband. Whether that gets you excited or brings up fear in you, please stay and listen to my chat with Nancy Houston. She is a licensed professional counselor and sex therapist who shares candidly about how to overcome barriers to intimacy in marriage.

We talk about how to work through sexual pasts, sex after having kids, the impact of porn and sexual addiction on marriage. And how getting healing from your past experiences can draw you closer to your husband.

There’s a big learning curve to all of this. And you know too many times we treat sex as something that should be automatic and if we love each other this should just work. And that’s just not true. I mean statistically 60 percent of couples are having some sort of sexual problem right this minute. 

What we chat about:

  • Why the Christian community needs to open up more about sex and healthy intimacy
  • How sex drive changes for women after they’ve had kids
  • The importance of foreplay for women especially
  • God gave us sex as a way to bond us together with our husband
  • Statistically, 60 percent of couples are having some sort of sexual problems at any given minute
  • A woman’s largest sex organ is her brain
  • The need for healing when you’ve experienced sexual abuse
  • How Nancy processed and found healing from the sexual trauma she experienced
  • Porn vs sexual addiction and the need for therapy
  • God made us for intimacy
  • Letting go of the negative aspects you may have built up around the idea of sex
  • Raising our kids to have a healthy view of sexuality
  • 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 and how it references sex in marriage
  • Having your hormones checked, exercise and eating healthy can help your body be prepared for sex
  • Having healthy conversations about sex with your husband (not during sex!)
  • Sex isn’t meant to be a performance, it’s meant to be a way for you and your husband to connect
  • Invite God into the sexual part of your marriage

Links Mentioned:

Nancy’s recommended books:

**Amazon affiliate link

May 14, 2018
Corporate Working Moms Stacey Causha Ep 205
58:14

There is a lot of pressure placed on moms to nurture and care for our families. Add the responsibilities of a full-time job on top of that and it easy to see why being a mom is called the hardest job in the world.

My friends Causha Jolly and Stacey McCabe share about life as working moms and the difficult balance they maintain everyday. I love how they share their hearts about being obedient to God’s assignment for them to work outside the home even in the difficult season of mothering little ones.

As a community of God-centered moms, we’re called to cheer on our sisters. It’s my hope that this episode will encourage you to bless and support other moms as they obey God.

Remember who you are in Christ, remember that you are called, remember that you are a daughter of the most high and never doubt that. 

(STAY TUNED. . .later this week I’ll release a blog post with more practical ideas on work/life balance from Causha)

What we chat about:

  • Causha and Stacy’s motherhood stories and why they chose to work outside the home
  • Why it’s harder for moms to travel and not worry about your kids vs. husbands traveling
  • How to respond when we fear we aren’t enough and struggle under the weight of expectations placed on moms
  • The difficulty of finding care for your kids while you work
  • The false internal judgement of good mom to bad mom scale
  • Feeling a divine assignment from God to be in a certain job
  • How it’s necessary to say, “No” to a lot when you have limited family time
  • The need to show grace for yourself so that you can have grace with your kids
  • Moms can’t be there every moment of every day, but Jesus will always be there
  • Teaching our kids to turn to Jesus to meet every one of their needs
  • Dealing with moments of insecurity as a working mom
  • When we judge a mom for her choices then we miss out on the blessing of supporting her in her obedience

Links Mentioned:

May 07, 2018
Centering Truth Lisa Bevere Ep 204
54:15

In her new book, New York Times bestselling author Lisa Bevere tackles the question, “What is truth?”. It is a defining question in our current age which is ruled by a shifting sea of opinions and a constantly changing culture. But, truth is person, Jesus. And, he is a Rock for his people.

When I began to look at this, I thought, ‘Oh my gosh, they were looking for Christ’. The magnet that would draw, but not be drawn, the one who is light, this whole dynamic of being invincible, that’s what adamant means… invincible… it’s also immovable, constant, that rock who follows us in the wilderness… That word in Hebrew means, ‘an unassailable refuge’. That made me realize that Christ is our unassailable refuge.

Listen as Lisa shares wisdom and encouragement for moms, daughters and followers of Christ everywhere.

What we chat about:

  • Lisa’s background and testimony of meeting Jesus and her husband
  • Parenting, discipline and setting your children up to win
  • The power of positive affirmation in strong-willed children
  • Explaining the why behind the rules and connecting it to God’s word
  • Having grace for the season you are in as a mom
  • Prayers for your kids to go beyond where you are in your walk with Christ
  • Doing motherhood well is not the same as doing it perfectly
  • The meaning of adamant and the background on Lisa’s new book
  • Christ is our unassailable refuge, our rock, our adamant
  • We can’t love what God loves if we don’t hate what God hates
  • The danger of pride and how it separates us from God’s grace
  • Jesus is our pattern for how to love
  • You will never regret kindness and loving words
  • Bring in the word of God when you have disagreements

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link

Apr 30, 2018
Hope for Infertility and Infant Loss Shawna Beucler Ep 203
58:25

Losing a baby to miscarriage or later in pregnancy is heartbreaking, especially when you are struggling with infertility. Imagine experiencing that type of loss multiple times. My guest and friend, Shawna Beucler shares the story behind her two healthy sons and the many babies she can’t wait to see again in heaven.

If you’re walking through the journey of infertility or have a friend who is, Shawna shares so beautifully why you shouldn’t walk alone in these places of pain and the power of friends lifting you up in prayer every day.

We would not have gone through and survived that time in our life had we not had people praying for us around the clock. Because sometimes the anger and the heartbreak when your heart meets tragedy… there is no prayer you can form. I needed a break from the Lord and I had other people holding that connection for me.

What we chat about:

  • Struggling with infertility, medical interventions and trying to get pregnant
  • IUI, IVF and miscarriages
  • Feeling the door shutting on future pregnancies
  • The Lord wants us to desire to love and know him
  • Losing a final baby and the traumatic process of going through delivery
  • People praying for you made the difference
  • Why Shawna wants to share her story
  • The healing that can come from talking about the pain in your life
  • Keeping your marriage together in times of deep grief
  • 1 Timothy 1:7 – For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
  • Philippians 4:13 – I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
  • Psalm 27:14 – Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.
  • Luke 1:37 – For nothing will be impossible with God.
  • How to help a friend who is walking through infertility

Links Mentioned:

Apr 23, 2018
Faith for the Unexpected Christine Caine 202
43:54

Powerhouse Christine Caine shares how she let go of fear and found faith for when the unexpected happened. Lots of truth and encouragement here for anyone who has encountered fear in parenting, a medical diagnosis and rejection in friendships… so all of us!

Jesus never said we’re not going to have trials. He said when trials come, not if, but when. I think sometimes as believers we forget that, but we have a grace within it. I think part of our testimony to a lost and broken world is the way we go through it.

What we chat about:

  • Christine Caine’s new book, Unexpected
  • Emboldening our faith and letting go of fear in motherhood
  • Trusting that God will fill in the gaps of what we’re able to do as parents
  • Basic spiritual practices can be some of the most powerful things in our lives
  • Facing painful actualites in a fallen world
  • Christine’s reaction to her cancer diagnosis
  • Jesus is the name above all other names, including cancer
  • Having a “faith cocoon” of friends to encourage you in the face of fear
  • Enduring suffering as Christians
  • Giving in to the pain and fear and suffering is not the answer
  • We serve a God who is bigger!
  • Godly motherhood in this generation is harder than it’s ever been
  • Leaning in with a spirit of faith and not pulling back with a spirit of fear
  • We’re called to train our children up and not restrain their giftings
  • Dealing with rejection in friendship and moving forward

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate link

Apr 16, 2018
The Day Fear Died Courtney Smallbone Ep 201
01:03:14

The Bible tells of healings, miracles and the power of the Holy Spirit, but God’s power didn’t stop after the New Testament. Today’s guest Courtney Smallbone shares her personal story of God’s power in the hardest circumstances imaginable.

Supernatural healing is for today. Courtney’s story of finding freedom from anxiety and miraculous healing for her infant son is a powerful testimony of God’s faithfulness.

As moms we have a lot of fear and anxiety. We carry a lot. We have these little people that we’re in charge of and discipling. It gets exhausting and hard. I felt like the Lord just filled me with himself. He has given me not the spirit of fear, but love and power and a sound mind. I needed a sound mind when I was dealing with anxiety. He has given us power through his Holy Spirit and we can walk that out as moms in everyday life.

What we chat about:

  • Courtney’s testimony of seeing God move in her life and health
  • How Courtney met her husband Luke Smallbone of For King and Country
  • The impact of Luke’s autoimmune disease on Courtney and her family
  • Dealing with anxiety and prescription medicine dependence
  • Getting freedom from the shame and finding healing holistically
  • The importance of community in the healing process
  • Why the church needs to embrace a holistic approach to healing and helping people be open about sharing their struggles
  • Courtney’s physical issues with her most recent pregnancy
  • The miracle of her son’s healing
  • Teaching our kids that prayer is powerful and effective and that God is real
  • Worshipping with your children invites them into a lifestyle of worship
  • Hearing God for others and the gift of the praying in the spirit

Links Mentioned:

Apr 09, 2018
The Entitlement Fix Jim Lynne Jackson Ep 200
55:49

Does it seem possible to draw our kids away from entitlement and toward the bigger “Yes” of God’s blessing for them and other people in their lives? Well, get excited because Jim and Lynne Jackson of Connected Families are back with parenting wisdom to address entitlement in our kids AND in ourselves.

We as parents feel entitled to grateful, hard working kids, and when we don’t get them an we have ungrateful, resistant-to-chores kids we get pretty upset. That shows that we feel entitled to how things go my way in the home. Instead of saying, ‘Oh! Wow we have some challenges here that I can partner with Jesus and really dive into.’

What we chat about:

  • Jim and Lynne Jackson introduce Connected Families and their parenting framework
  • The root of entitled behavior in our kids and the beliefs that back it up
  • Entitlement is the belief that I deserve something because I’m more important than someone else
  • Entitlement is about our sin nature and we’re all born into that
  • As believers we need to call out entitlement in our lives and choose to put God first
  • We as parents feel entitled to grateful, hard-working kids
  • The attitude we bring into parenting and our beliefs are reflected onto our kids
  • Helping our kids learn to work hard and celebrate accomplishments give them a dopamine burst in their brains that helps “rewire” them to want to work hard again
  • Letting go of the places we are coddling our kids by not expecting them to serve and do hard things
  • The “Bigger Yes” of God’s blessing for your kids and other people
  • Take it slow and consider your kid’s perspective as you make changes toward growing our kids out of entitlement
  • Determining the rights, privileges and responsibilities of your family
  • When our kids see the beliefs we fight for and see the joy we experience as we follow God and it inclines them to want that too

Links Mentioned:

 

Apr 02, 2018
Discipline and Toddlers Hailey Bain Meredith Woodruff Ep 199
59:24

Discipline. It’s such an important part of parenting and so hard. But, we don’t have to be alone on the journey. Join me as I sit down with two moms of littles from my church, Meredith and Hailey. We chat about the common struggles and questions that come up in disciplining young kids.

Our kids) have the opportunity to be saved by grace through faith just like we were, not by works and not by good parenting. But, it’s the consistency of the love and the safety. And when you have that and they do confess faith then you have the Holy Spirit on your side to do the convicting.

What we chat about:

  • Discipline can be a struggle, but we’re not alone in this journey
  • Ask yourself, “Will it matter in 10 years?”
  • Focusing on making our children feel safe
  • The child that’s annoying you the most, you should hug the most even though it’s the opposite of your instinct
  • A lot of the anger that comes up in us as moms comes from unresolved issues in us, not just our kids’ behavior
  • Mommy Time, getting intentional focused time with each child
  • During the 0-5 ages, kids change so much it’s difficult to keep up with the huge developmental changes they are undergoing
  • Leaning into the Holy Spirit when we need to make a decision in parenting to avoid letting fear and insecurity win
  • It’s hard to know what the realistic expectations are for obedience at different ages
  • Don’t sabotage the good in pursuit of the great
  • Disciplining in public requires different tools, take steps to set your kids up to win
  • Your kids will be saved by grace through faith and not through perfect parenting
  • God’s kindness leads us to repentance, so we need to discipline with kindness as well
  • Grace for parenting changes when you add a new baby to your family

More Episodes on Discipline:

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon Affiliate link. At no extra cost to you a portion of your purchase will go back to support the God Centered Mom Podcast.

Mar 26, 2018
Social Media Heart Check Eryn Hall Ep 197
51:26

Staying up-to-date on social media can so easily turn into an hour of lost time scrolling on our phones that leaves us discontent and disconnected with the ones we love the most. It’s a struggle most of us deal with in this digital age we’re in, and I’ve brought in my friend Eryn Hall to give us practical tips and encouragement on how to do social media well.

My highlight reel is going to look different than someone else’s highlight reel and that’s how it should be. We need to accept that and rest in the Lord. The grace and goodness I have and my acceptance, my identity is found in him and not in someone else’s social media.

If limiting your own screen time is something you struggle with, check out the apps in the show notes below to start monitoring your time. Ask a friend or GCM podcast club member to check in with you for accountability. Let’s live our lives for God and for our families first, not just for the social media posts.

What we chat about:

  • How to do social media from a Godly worldview
  • Recognizing how social media makes us feel and doing a heart check
  • Learning to rest in God’s approval and not in the approval of social media
  • Stepping away and asking God, “Is this for me?” before responding to a place of potential jealousy
  • Paying attention to whether we are finding our identity in God or in social media
  • Boundaries we’ve put in place on social media
  • Not looking at social media first thing in the morning and starting our day off in prayer so we are secure in who God says we are
  • Healthy switches for spending your time on something other than social media
  • Staying present with your kids with boundaries on your device usage
  • Not immediately posting a picture of an event or activity and checking your “why” behind the photos and posts
  • Be sure of who you are and whose you are before you post
  • A cool story about how someone came to Jesus after reading God’s word on social media
  • Being digital evangelists and staying faithful to the message of who God is

Links Mentioned:

Mar 12, 2018
The Right to Change My Mind Bruce Heather Ep 196
45:36

Life is full of decisions. We do our best to choose wisely and follow God’s lead. Sometimes God leads us in a different direction. It doesn’t always make “sense” in the moment.  And it definitely isn’t easy to share those changes with others.

It’s been over a year since we’ve given you a glimpse behind the scenes. In that time A LOT has happened in our world: new job, school shifts, adopting & “re-homing” a puppy. So I’m bringing my hubby Bruce back on the show to share one concept he’s used at work for years and he has helped me process the last year of change.

In this episode Bruce and I let you in on the thought process behind our life choices. Hoping this conversation will allow you grace to change your mind without the fear of what others think.

I reserve the right to change my mind and not have to explain it to you, but every person who hears about it wants to know the whole story. What I’ve found is people want to know the should. Every time I talk to a mom, they are feeling this pressure to get it all right, so then when they hear a story that doesn’t work out or where you changed your mind they are trying to analyze the rightness of it.

What we chat about:

  • What’s happened in the MacFadyen family in the past year
  • Bruce’s current business, Door Real Estate Brokerage
  • The mantra, “I always reserve the right to change my mind”
  • Making the decision to send one of our sons back to school after a semester of homeschooling
  • What happened with our dog
  • Giving yourself freedom to change your mind
  • Being gracious to others who change their minds
  • Why we need to give our kids and ourselves permission to make mistakes
  • Working to create an environment at home where it’s okay to change your mind and make mistakes
  • In all of the decisions in life it’s about balance and listening to God’s voice

Links Mentioned:

Mar 05, 2018
Sinners Married to Sinners Cheryl Scruggs Jae Carpenter Ep 195
01:06:19

It’s not all sunshine and roses in marriage, even when both you and your husband follow Jesus. My guests today share about one of the most painful possibilities in a marriage —infidelity.

My friend Jae tells her story of learning her husband had an affair and the work God did in both of their lives to restore their marriage. Licensed professional counselor Cheryl Scruggs shares about her infidelity, divorce, and eventual re-marriage, along with a lot of practical advice and scriptures she learned in the seven years she was separated from her husband.

The main takeaway? HOPE. There is hope for your marriage. It’s not easy, because we’re all sinners, but God can heal and restore us when we surrender it all to him.

For all of us in marriage, I think it’s important that we are paying attention. In John 10:10 it says that the thief comes kill, steal and destroy, but I have come to give you life and life abundantly. God wants us to have a great marriage, not easy, not perfect. But it’s really understanding we’re both sinners and how are we going to walk this walk together in this relationship as a sinner married to a sinner. 

**If you are in a relationship where you or your children have been physically abused, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or http://www.thehotline.org.

What we chat about:

  • Cheryl Scruggs and Jae share their marriage stories.
  • Discovering God’s plans for marriage.
  • Hope for restoration in marriage even after an affair.
  • How do you know if God is asking you to stay in a marriage?
  • Trusting God with your spouse and being open to what he wants to teach you and show you.
  • Understanding our role as a wife God has called you to be.
  • Recognizing the situations where it’s necessary to leave a marriage (physical safety, lifestyle of infidelity).
  • It takes time for healing in marriage.
  • Physical intimacy throughout marriage conflicts.
  • Balancing advice from friends and family with what God wants for your marriage.
  • Biblical roles in marriage.

Scriptures Mentioned:

    • Eph. 3:20 – Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us
    • Matthew 19:26 – Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
    • Deuteronomy 8:1-10 – Be careful to follow every command I am giving you today, so that you may live and increase and may enter and possess the land the Lord promised on oath to your ancestors. Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands… For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land. [read full passage]
    • John 10:10 – The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

Links Mentioned:

Feb 26, 2018
Praying the Scriptures Jodie Berndt Ep 194
46:45

We know that God’s word is living and active. Today’s guest Jodie Berndt takes us through using Bible verses as prayers that can powerfully influence your children’s lives.

There is so much encouragement in this episode for standing on the truth of God’s word and relying on scripture to help shape your children, teens and adult children. Of course, we as moms can’t help but be changed when we hide his word in our hearts and pray them over our family.

We know that he is a loving God who knows our needs and our kids’ needs better than we know them. So when we lift our children to him and surrender them, he’s going to do for them what he knows they need. It might not be necessarily in the timing or the ways that he would’ve ordained, but in Isaiah 55 it says that his ways are higher and better than our ways. When we come to believe that, it can really bring peace to our lives.

What we chat about:

  • Using God’s word for prayers is powerful.
  • There isn’t a need we’ll face in parenting that God hasn’t provided for in his word.
  • Specific scriptures to pray for your child’s salvation
  • Asking God what we can nurture and pray for in each child’s unique giftings
  • God will accomplish the changes in your child’s character. Our job is to partner with him.
  • Praying against fear and for protection
  • Asking God to shape your children into good friends
  • Processing popular media with your kids and discussing how it aligns or doesn’t align with a Godly world view
  • The power of having others pray for your kids in community
  • When prayers aren’t answered the way we want, God is still writing their stories.
  • Free resources available at https://jodieberndt.com/resources

Scriptures Mentioned:

  • Ephesians 4:29 – Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
  • John 15:7 – If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.
  • Psalm 121:7-8 – The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
  • Acts 26:18 –  Open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.
  • 2 Corinthians 5:17 –  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:[a] The old has gone, the new is here!
  • Colossians 3:12 – Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
  • Philippians 2:13 – for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.
  • Psalm 91:11 – For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways;
  • Proverbs 17:17 – Shape my child into a friend who loves at all times
  • Proverbs 27:17 – As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.
  • Proverbs 16:28 – A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.

Links Mentioned:

Feb 19, 2018
How God Personally Pursues and Redeems Jenn Jett Ep 193
51:52

After 15 years of marriage, Jenn Jett experienced the pain of divorce. But in that place of brokenness, she felt peace that God would redeem and heal her as she said, “Yes” to him. 

Listen as she shares her story about how the Lord pursued her, fought for her and surprised her more than she expected with his redeeming love.

The Lord called me to himself and said, ‘Your hope does not need to be in the success of your marriage, it needs to be in me.’ We are so motivated by measures of success and we can look at our circumstances and either feel great or responsible and shameful.

What we chat about:

  • Jenn’s story of brokeness and pain in marriage and divorce
  • Redefining redemption from God’s perspective
  • Marriage and motherhood can become idols
  • Saying Yes to the things of God can take us on an adventure
  • The importance of community and friends as we process lies we’re believing
  • The power of prayer and learning not to hold back in prayer
  • Healing and restoration is possible even after what feels like a catastrophe
  • The Lord pursues and fights for us through multiple ways
  • Scripture: Isaiah 61 & 62
  • Finding our identity in Christ is so key before we have a hard life situation

31 Days for Prayer for the Dreamer and Doer“** 

Links Mentioned:

Feb 12, 2018
Manage Your Life with Guilt-Free Confidence Christy Wright Ep 192
49:48

Get ready for a huge pep talk from one of today’s biggest business personalities, Christy Wright. She shares some of her story and a whole lot of encouragement for women whether you own a business or not.

If you struggle with guilt for taking time for yourself or prioritizing your time and saying no, Christy gives wisdom and practical advice to help you reframe your situation and move forward with confidence and kindness.

What we chat about:

  • Christy’s story of growing up with a single working mom who owned a business.
  • Letting go of mom guilt and looking at time away from our kids as healthy and necessary.
  • One of the most powerful things you can show your kids is how you take care of yourself.
  • Never say anything about yourself that you don’t want your kids to say about themselves.
  • Getting on the same page with your spouse about taking time away.
  • Decision making paradigm shift and protecting your time.
  • How to say “no” with confidence and kindness.
  • Prioritizing your time around your goals, family and what you enjoy.
  • An honest ‘no’ is better than a dishonest ‘yes’.
  • The imposter syndrome and how it impacts women and high achievers.
  • Take the first step even when you are fearful and it will start momentum to do even bigger things.
  • Making baby steps to move out of a “stuck” place.

Questions to ask to help identify your strengths: 

  1. What do you enjoy?
  2. What is effortless for you?
  3. Where do you excel in relation to others?
  4. What do others encourage in you?
  5. What gives you energy?

“Business Boutique”**:

Links Mentioned:

Feb 05, 2018
A Safe Place to Share Messy Stories Jamie Ivey Ep 191
47:13

When she got married, Jamie Ivey became a pastor’s wife. Stepping into this role made her feel there was no one who she could be fully open with about her past. But, keeping these secrets kept her in shame and insecurity.

In her new book, If You Only Knew**, she shares how opening up about her past revealed the beauty of God’s grace in her life and about the freedom it has brought her and others.

(If you want to hear my “If You Only Knew” story about anxiety and anger, check it out over on Jamie’s “The Happy Hour” podcast.)

What we chat about:

  • Jamie Ivey’s story reconciling her past with her Christian walk.
  • How sharing your story can show the beauty of God’s grace and redemption.
  • Examining our underlying motivation for decisions.
  • We are not in control of our kids’ salvation and that is a good thing!
  • How to find a friend who is safe to share your full story with and how to be that type of friend.
  • We can have compassion for the broken when we realize that it’s only by the grace of God we haven’t made bigger mistakes.
  • Bringing discipline with your kids back around to the Gospel because that’s where the freedom lies.
  • The importance of community and allowing others to speak truth into our lives when we fall into places of shame and guilt.
  • God sees the righteousness of Jesus and not our shame when he looks at us.
  • When to tell our kids about our stories and how important it is to talk about sex and places of sin in our homes first.

“If You Only Knew” book **:

Links Mentioned:
Jan 29, 2018
Set Free From Shame Jeannie Cunnion Ep 190
43:05

So much of parenting is really about the work God is doing in our own hearts. Jeannie Cunnion shares her story of being set free from the shame of her past and learning to let go of performance-based parenting.

If you feel there IS something that separates you from the love of God, this is the episode for you. Jeannie shares encouraging truth and practical applications for giving ourselves and our kids grace.

What we chat about:

  • Why we need to be set free from shame of our pasts to live in the freedom of Christ.
  • Jeannie’s story of a painful, short-lived marriage and the shame she carried from it.
  • What performance-based parenting looks like.
  • Shame-driven messages vs. grace-driven messages.
  • We all have things that we believe will separate us from God, but he says nothing will separate us.
  • Research about children who grow up in Christian homes.
  • The importance of talking to our children about our failings and God’s grace.
  • Creating a home of confession instead of a home of perfection.
  • Acknowledge that we’re all going to make mistakes and that’s ok.
  • Jeannie’s Three R’s: Remember, Rely and Recognize
 

Links Mentioned:

Jan 22, 2018
Rest for the Exhausted mom September McCarthy Ep 189
47:29

As an author, event planner, teacher, wife, mom of 10 and grandmother to 2, September McCarthy has plenty to fill her days. She relates to the universal exhaustion on our mom souls–the beating ourselves up and the fighting for joy. 

September has so much wisdom to share from what God has taught her in seasons of busyness and motherhood in different stages.

Listen as we go through questions from GCM listeners on motherhood topics including finding joy in the hard times, the value of rest and bringing your children alongside you in your work as a mom.

As moms we are going to be tired. Might as well be tired over the things that bring you joy. And choose those things.

What we chat about:

  • September’s motherhood story including miscarriages & infant loss. 
  • Answers to questions from moms like you.
  • Focusing less on feeling the joy in your days and more on gratitude.
  • When you are in the busy seasons of life, be cautious what you take on. Ask yourself, do I need to do this?
  • Not letting our “fear of missing out” for children direct our decisions. 
  • The importance of guarding our thoughts and taking negative thoughts captive.
  • “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”  Romans 12:2
  • There is value and strength in rest and doing what God wants for your body.
  • Find one to two moms who can help you when you need it.
  • Let go of feeling like you need to everything well and enjoy it.
  • Bringing your kids into you work as a mom and encouraging them to work as a team.
  • Tips on teaching character to kids who want your attention all the time.

Links Mentioned:

Jan 15, 2018
Quiet Your Inner Critic and Practice Self-Compassion Kim Fredrickson Ep 188
49:49

If you’ve ever ended the day feeling like a failure and critiquing every misstep, then this episode on practicing self-compassion is for you.

As a licensed marriage and family therapist and life coach, Kim Fredrickson has counseled and taught others about self-compassion for years. When she received an unexpected terminal diagnosis of pulmonary fibrosis, a rare side-effect of the treatment she had received for breast cancer, she wrote a book to leave for her children on giving that same compassion to the grandchildren she may never meet.

When people feel ashamed, they blame other people because they feel like if I really look at my shame then I’m going to collapse inside. That’s why self-compassion is desperately important because kids feel shame a lot. They fail at everything at the start.

What we chat about:

  • Kim’s story of receiving a devastating diagnosis after completing treatment for breast cancer
  • How she’s chosen to spend the years she has left with her family
  • The new book she wrote for when her children have kids called “Give Your Kids a Break: Parenting with Compassion for You and Your Children”
  • How it’s a process to develop a compassionate inner voice
  • Applying grace and truth to every situation in our lives
  • Variety of temperaments–some that are harder on themselves than others.
  • The difference between self-compassion and self-pity
  • Encouraging your children to practice self-compassion and reinforcing it by showing ourselves that same
  • Giving our kids the language to identify their failings and separate them from their self- worth
  • Moms have a really hard job. It’s ok to acknowledge that.
  • The importance of taking care of ourselves as moms
  • How to talk to your kids after you’ve been hard on yourself and reframing it with self compassion

Links Mentioned:

Jan 08, 2018
Empowering Refugee Women Stephanie Giddens Ep 187
46:58

It’s painful when our dreams fall apart. Stephanie Giddens shares how although her family’s dream to move to Africa didn’t work out, God gave her an even bigger dream for the refugee community in her own city. The God assigned her the privilege of building Vickery Trading Company. A company that provides for families, empowers refugee women and bridges cultural divides. 

The GREAT news is you can be a part of empowering women by purchasing any of the sewn items! The BEST news is, they not only have adorable dresses for little girls, for a limited time they have holiday lounge pants for men, women and children!!! (Check them out here)

What we chat about:

  • The surprising twists and turns in Stephanie’s family’s story.
  • Grieving over the death a dream and not understanding the “why” behind bad circumstances.
  • We as believers get the privilege of being a part of God’s story.
  • How Stephanie is helping refugees in Dallas with her children’s clothing company, Vickery Trading Co.
  • The struggle that refugees face when they come to America.
  • Stories of hope God has orchestrated with the refugees Stephanie works with
  • Building community among people of different cultures by focusing on the commonalities we all have as people.
  • English is one of the biggest barriers for refugees.
  • How focusing on what is going well and on encouragement can make a big difference in your outlook on life.

Links Mentioned:

Nov 27, 2017
Don't Mom Alone GCM Live Event Kat Lee Wynter Pitts Ep 185
59:21

Jump into this special episode from the God Centered Mom “Live” event held November 3 to celebrate four years of the GCM podcast. Guests, Kat Lee & Wynter Pitts share about mentorship, friendship and dealing with fear and insecurity in motherhood.

What we chat about:

  • Kat Lee and Wynter Pitts’ motherhood stories
  • Dealing with insecurities in motherhood
  • The importance of having mentors and deep friends in the motherhood journey
  • Mentors don’t have to be older than you or available weekly. Find a way to make mentorship work for you.
  • Think of areas you are struggling with and look for someone who excels in that area to mentor you, no matter their age
  • Start or join a GCM podcast club as a way to connect with other women
  • You can be a mentor too! Look for younger moms who need encouragement.
  • We are never alone because God is with us, but it’s hard to remember that when life gets crazy. Kat and Wynter share what helps them remember God in the midst of life.
  • “Should is not a sustainable why.” Don’t just do things you SHOULD do if you don’t have a good reason for WHY.
  • Helping your kids develop healthy friendships and community
  • Not trying to over control your children’s lives and praying through how involved you should be in their friendships
  • Hope for dealing with irrational fears and grief
  • Giving yourself permission to be honest with God when you aren’t coping well and realizing that he is good despite your circumstances
Nov 13, 2017
Behind the Chewbacca Mask Candace Payne Ep 184
42:28

Remember THAT viral video? You know, the one where the mom wears the Chewbacca mask? Her contagious laugh was heard all over the interwebs. Today my friend and vodcast host, Kay Wyma, and I are thrilled to chat with the one and only Chewbacca Mom, Candace Payne.

Listen in as Candace gives us a glimpse into more of her story.  And talks about finding satisfying joy in all of life’s circumstances.

Happiness brings instant gratification based on things that happen to us… Joy’s that thing that satisfies and lasts beyond [circumstances].

What we chat about:

  • How joy informs who we are “behind the mask.”
  • Finding joy in the little things… like a Chewbacca mask in the clearance aisle of Kohl’s.
  • Overcoming adversity by choosing positivity.
  • The two types of joy and where we can find true satisfaction.
  • Changing a “never” list to an “always” list.
  • Choosing hope over fear, and thriving even when the worst-case happens.
  • What can happen when you stop living in anxiety.
  • Fighting comparison, the frenemy of joy.

Links Mentioned:

Nov 06, 2017
How the Gospel Pulls Us Travis Thisl Tyler Ep 183
59:48

Born four days apart in 1977, Travis (aka “Thi’sl”) and I didn’t choose where or to whom we were born. But God did. And He placed us in very different homes and stories. Yet the gospel intersected both of our lives, pulled us forward and continues to pull us.

Granted, Travis’ transformation is a lil more interesting and dramatic than mine. But we both were sinners in need of a Savior. And around our 40th birthdays, our paths crossed with an invitation for a trip to Israel.

After hearing bits & pieces of Travis’ story while on our trip and then hearing him perform and share his testimony at a concert. . .I knew I had to share “Thi’sl” with y’all.

In this episode you’ll gain hope for any loved one or situation you think is “too far gone” for God to redeem. You’ll be reminded that God is in the business of rescuing and making things right. And that God fights for you (which ironically my pastor reminded us of yesterday). You can drop your weapons of control. You can surrender your way and follow God’s way. And believe God is for you and He CAN free you (spoiler alert: just like how He actually freed Travis from prison!!).

(Here’s a little pic with some of my fam and me visiting Thi’sl before his concert)

At the end of the interview Travis shares 3 questions he answers in his book, “Against All Odds”:

What is my identity. What am I living for? Am I too far gone for God to use me?

Here are his answers:

You’re not too far gone. God created you for a purpose. God made you in His image.

Boom.

Connect with Thi’sl:

Links Mentioned:

 

Oct 30, 2017
When your child is on the autism spectrum part two Terri Conlin Ep 182
36:24

What we chat about:

  • How friends can support and love a family whose child has autism.
  • What to do when your child doesn’t get invited to birthday parties.
  • Facilitating friendships for your child with autism.
  • How to help them get through puberty.
  • How to talk to your child about their diagnosis.
  • How do you know the difference between a symptom of autism and behavior needing discipline.
  • What can your expectations be in teaching your child with autism about Jesus?

Biblical Counseling Resources:

Links Mentioned:

Oct 24, 2017
When Your Child is on the Autism Spectrum Part One Terri Conlin Ep 182
44:27

Don’t you wish you could chat with an older mom who’s been there? Who knows what its like to care for and deal with the needs of a child with autism? Well, today I’m bringing that person to you!

Terri Conlin is the mom to four grown children. One of her sons (now 23 years old) was diagnosed as a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder. She’s here to provide her story. The challenges and the triumphs. The places of help and of heartache.

Y’all shared wonderful questions with me via Instagram. Thank you for letting me know what’s been hard for you. Thank you for wanting to help your friends who have children on the spectrum. Once again, my hope is to learn you’re not alone.

(Stay tuned for part two of our conversation, which will go live on Wednesday, Oct 25th).

What we chat about:

  • Getting the diagnosis of autism.
  • How Terri meditated on the Psalms to put faith back in God when spit at/punched/kicked.
  • Recognizing the grief therapy she and her husband needed.
  • The impact of autism on the entire family.
  • Learning to slow their pace down.
  • Helping siblings cope.
  • How a mentor encouraged her and eased her loneliness.

Biblical Counseling Resources:

 

Oct 23, 2017
Thinking Differently About Sabbath :: Shelly Miller [Ep 181]
50:34

You may know you “should” keep the Sabbath. And perhaps you then get stuck on “how”. Hopefully this episode will remove the shameful burden of “should” and shift the question from “how” to “who”. Shelly Miller, author of Rhythms of Rest, joins me in helping you develop a rhythm to cease from work and celebrate true rest in Jesus.

But what does sabbath rest look like specifically for young moms and those in ministry? Listen in as Shelly talks through the difference between routines and rhythms, and Jesus’ call to embrace what is easy and light.

What we chat about:

  • What does it mean to practice sabbath in 2017?
  • Separating the sabbath from rules and regulations, and embracing what is “easy and light.”
  • The way we rest is unique to who we are, and may be different from how even our family members find rest.
  • Prioritizing rest as a family and coming up with a plan for how each family member can practice sabbath.
  • The main goal isn’t a set amount of time or even a day, but setting apart time time to rest
  • Discovering the difference between routines and rhythms.
  • How planning and preparation impact our ability to rest.
  • Advice for the mom whose family is uninterested in implementing the sabbath.
  • Finding like-minded community in Shelly’s Sabbath Society.

Links Mentioned:

Oct 16, 2017
Freedom from Anxiety Ashley Willis Ep 180
59:26

Scripture tells us to ‘cast our cares upon the Lord’. But how do we practically obey that command while gripped by the stronghold of anxiety? Today I’m talking with Ashley Willis about battling anxiety, a topic she’s experienced first hand.

Whether you’ve experienced anxiety personally or not, chances are someone in your life will. Listen as Ashley discusses practical ways to get to the root of anxiety, and how to fight fear with the truth of God’s Word.

We’re answering the questions you shared with me over on Instagram. Questions about whether anxiety is a sin, when/if medication should be used, how to help a spouse who is anxious and several other questions. Thank you for being brave in sharing your stories with me. You are not alone.

What we chat about:

  • Is a Christian’s struggle with anxiety a form of sin?
  • Coping with anxiety by understanding the lies the mind believes and replacing those lies with the truth of God’s Word.
  • When to address anxiety with Christian counseling and medication, if necessary.
  • How do we practically obey the command of casting our cares upon the Lord?
  • Wrestling with the decision to take medication for anxiety and depression.
  • The importance of addressing the root of anxiety and not just the symptoms.
  • Fighting anxiety by reciting Scripture and praying out loud.
  • How to come alongside family members battling anxiety.
  • The importance of talking openly about anxiety in safe contexts, especially as moms.
  • Keeping the fear of “what-if’s” from overrunning our lives.
  • Jesus’ example of spending time alone to commune with His Father.

Biblical Counseling Resources:

Links Mentioned:

Oct 09, 2017
How to Discern God's Will and Stick With It :: Tricia Goyer [Ep 179]
50:55

You clearly heard God’s call. But why is obeying Him sometimes so difficult? In today’s interview my longtime friend and renowned author, Tricia Goyer, discusses obeying the Lord even when it isn’t easy, and how He blesses the faithfulness of His children.

Listen as Tricia discusses the unique way the Lord grew her family through unplanned pregnancies, biological children, foster care, and adoption. You’ll love her honesty and transparency as she shares the hard moments that had her questioning decisions, and the way the Lord has blessed her family along the way.

What we chat about:

  • Obeying the Lord’s call to adopt (again and again and again) even after feeling “finished”
  • Taking a break from speaking and writing to shepherd her daughters as they healed from past trauma.
  • The sacrifice of stepping away from public ministry to focus on personal ministry at home.
  • Understanding God’s heart and direction for our lives by spending time in His Word and in prayer
  • Being called to multiple ministries and projects
  • Seeing a need that coincides with God’s commands from His Word
  • Trusting God while navigating His direction for our lives
  • Obeying God even when it’s hard and you find yourself asking, “why did I do this?”
  • Reaching out to our support systems when walking through hard providence
  • Finding beauty in the chaos and being thankful for the hard times
  • Moses communed with God face to face despite being called to a seemingly impossible
  • The importance of steadfast obedience even though we want a quick fix
  • The legacy we pass to our children when they see us obey the Lord despite difficulty

Links Mentioned:

 

Oct 02, 2017
Drop the Superwoman Myth and Run Your Race :: Jessica Honegger [Ep 178]
44:40

Mom and entrepreneur Jessica Honegger shares a bit of her story behind starting her business Noonday Collection and a whole lot of truth about partnering with God in both motherhood AND entrepreneurship.

This has definitely been a journey where God doesn’t call the qualified, he qualifies the called. I didn’t have a background in fashion or an MBA, but I have always been passionate about bringing justice for the poor and more opportunities to those in our midst who haven’t had as much opportunities.

Jump into her story with me and get ready for real-talk about letting go of cultural norms and superwoman myths and finding freedom in who God says you are.

It’s just the pep talk we need to do the things God has called us to do and not sit any longer in fear, insecurity and comparison. "Get up and go!!"

What we chat about:

  • The background story of Noonday Collection.
  • How Jessica started her business when her children were small and struggled with the definition of a “good mom”.
  • Finding freedom knowing there wasn’t a dichotomy between being a mom and a businesswoman.
  • Focusing on what helps your individual family flourish instead of following others’ paths
  • Getting clarity from God on who he says you are brings healing and gives us freedom to pursue the work he has for us.
  • God has not called us to just sit and pray, but to go and be out in the world doing his work.
  • Stopping the superwoman myth and admitting we need help in areas of life, especially in areas we aren’t gifted in or don’t enjoy.
  • Creating the spaces and community we need--focusing on what you have. 
  • How to support friends who run small businesses.
  • Stories of people whose lives have been impacted by Noonday Collection. 

 

Sep 24, 2017
Parenting Small Shontell Brewer Ep 140
56:51

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him.  

Oct 31, 2016
Wisdom from Grammie Doris Howard Ep 109
49:42

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him. /

Feb 26, 2016
Know God by studying His Word in 15 minutes a day Katie Orr Ep 101
47:44

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him. /

Dec 31, 2015
Connecting with Your Kids in Any Circumstance Jim & Lynne Jackson Ep 98
01:03:26

What we chat about:

  • The busyness of the holidays and how it inhibits connection with our kids.
  • Showing yourself self-compassion.
  • What phrases are you repeating in your mind that fuel anxiety.
  • How to apply the Connecting Families framework to a stressful situation Heather experienced.
  • Why kids can behave better at school/other places and fall apart at home.
  • Working with your kids in challenging scenarios.
  • How to connect with our kids when we don't even like them.
  • Dealing with your need to get parents' approval (the grandparents) when kids misbehave.
  • When the lies we believe about our kids impacts our ability to connect.
  • What to do when you are trying to connect with your child and they are not responding.
  • An easy way to connect with your kids on a regular basis (holidays included).
  • Working with your kids to prepare for the holidays.

Connect with Jim & Lynne:

Connected Families Site :: Facebook :: Twitter :: Pinterest

Links Mentioned:

Dec 02, 2015
I'm Happy for You (Sort Of...Not Really) :: Kay Wyma {Ep 85}
49:27

What if your son can't read as he enters first grade? What if your daughter prefers wrestling to ballet? What if your living room sofa has a couple rips and stains from a decade of use?

These things shouldn't be a big deal. But then you notice your friend's first grade boy is reading chapter books. . . and her daughter gracefully glides into class with a giant bow on her head . . . and their living room just got a make-over with coordinating floor-to-ceiling curtains.

Personally? My feelings of "less than" often start at a place of comparison. I know I shouldn't compare. I know it doesn't make me feel good. Yet day after day I glance around making sure I keep pace with the Joneses.

How do I move past comparison to contentment? And even more important, how do I get to a place where I can celebrate her athletic child or new couch or beach vacation?

Well, today's podcast guest, Kay Wyma, shines a light on the age old comparison problem and guides us to a better place of connection and true community.

In Kay's latest book, "I'm Happy for You (Sort Of . . .Not Really)", she helps readers find contentment in a culture of comparison.

"Looking at what we lack prevents us from noticing how sweet the world already is. But when we shift our focus from what could be to what actually is, we find extraordinary joy in our ordinary lives." 

I've been a big Kay fan since a dinner party over six years ago.  As I sat hugely pregnant with our 3rd son, she encouraged me in my role as young mom.

Kay is authentic, brilliant and refreshing.  My hope is her wisdom and practical tips in this episode help you stop comparing and draw you closer to the women you interact with daily.

What we chat about:

  • Encouraging one another by running alongside, instead of determined to "win"
  • Focusing on "being together" more than hosting the perfect dinner party
  • Being our best instead of being "the best", discovering our "you"-niqueness
  • How a "mental" computer reboot (cnt/alt/del) helps fight comparison
  • Whose light is revealing your reflection (& the Kylie Jenner Challenge)
  • How to help our kids navigate social media and speak life to their friends
  • How our friends can help us "reboot" the messages we believe.
  • How to enter back-to-school with fresh perspective, moving from comparison to compassion (repurposing school supplies).
  • Why I can never look at an Instagram pic of feet on the beach the same way.

Connect with Kay:

The MOAT Blog :: Facebook :: Twitter

Links Mentioned:

Aug 30, 2015
For the Love of God Jenny Supizio Ep 48
40:25

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him. /

Feb 08, 2015
Family Movie Moms-Annie & more Ep 53
0
Feb 08, 2015
Atlas Girl :: Emily Wierenga Ep 32
0
Jul 27, 2014
Hope for the Struggling Mom :: Interview with September McCarthy {GCM Podcast Ep. 15}
44:18
Mar 09, 2014
Temperament Guide: Help for all types of moms of all types of kids {Episode 14}
35:10
Mar 03, 2014
Parenting Joy {GCM Podcast Episode 13} with Rachel Anne Ridge
33:45

Heather interviews Rachel Anne Ridge. 

Feb 17, 2014
The Antelope in the Living Room {Episode 12} Melanie Shankle
46:06

Heather interviews NYTimes Best Selling Author, Melanie Shankle. They discuss Melanie's new book, "The Antelope in the Living Room". Melanie tells the story of one of her humbling marriage moments. At the end of the podcast, Melanie shares how she stays God-centered and how she chooses what to read from the Bible. 

Feb 10, 2014
The BEST Ever Life {GCM Episode 11} with Nancy Williams
35:18

Heather interviews her mentor's mentor, Nancy William. A grandma to 10 and great-grandma to 4, Nancy provides wisdom and great perspective. She also shares a family gratitude tradition dating back 40 years. Also discussed: mom guilt, best parenting resource, praying with your kids, and husbands who work a lot. 

Feb 03, 2014
First Time (God-Centered) Mom {Episode 10 with Crystal Stine}
36:46

Heather interviews Crystal Stine, mother to two-year old Maddie. Crystal shares her story of reluctantly walking into motherhood. The humbling process of experiencing a miscarriage. The joy of having her daughter. She also gives ideas for ways she makes time to spend in God's word throughout a busy day of juggling a full-time (outside the home) job and being a mom.  

Jan 25, 2014
Discipleship 101 {GCM Ep 9 with Cathy Price}
28:01

Heather interviews her mom, Cathy Price. They discuss the what, how, who, and why of discipleship. If you've ever been curious about what it means to be a discple or to disciple others, this episode is for you. 

Jan 18, 2014
GCM podcast-Ep. 8-Redeeming Love (Rebekah Greer)
46:54

Heather interviews a long time friend, Rebekah Greer. In this episode Rebekah shares her story of marriage at a young age, her husband's infidelity, multiple attempts at reconciliation and their eventual divorce. She also vulnerably shares the challenges of being a single mom with 5 kids and how the church supported her through that time. Make sure you listen to the whole episode to hear how without any plan to find another husband, the Lord graciously provided a wonderful man whom she married several years ago. Rebekah wonderfully communicates the hope in connecting with God over any other relationship and the beauty of redeeming love. 

Jan 13, 2014
GCM Podcast- Ep. 7 with Tricia Goyer
34:32

Heather interviews Tricia Goyer, an experienced author and mother of 6 children (ages 3 to 24). They discuss balancing working at home with family life. In addition, they encourage the listener to see where God is working and join Him. The conversation also includes ideas on how to select activities for your family and how to include children in your ministries. 

Dec 30, 2013
GCM-Ep 6-Donut Dates
23:01

Heather interviews her father discussing ideas to be intentional in teaching children God's Word and in spending quality time with them. Her dad, John Price, shares how he grew up in a "Christian" culture but never really grasped salvation until adulthood. Listen to how he decided to study the Bible with his kids and his method of doing so. Resources mentioned in the podcast can be found at GodCenteredMom.com. 

Dec 17, 2013
God Centered Mom Episode 5-Serving as a Family {Bruce MacFadyen}
29:17

Heather interviews her husband Bruce MacFadyen. He shares his experience taking short-term mission trips with his family. Through exposure to other cultures, children gain appreciation, perspective and gratitude for all they have been given. He also found the trips gave him opportunities to try out new skill sets and learn his giftedness. The biggest benefit being how his family bonded through a common purpose. 

Dec 09, 2013
God Centered Mom Podcast-Episode 4 with Francie Winslow
32:04

Heather interviews Francie Winslow, author of the blog, "Up, In and Out". They discuss the topic of spiritual health. Is there something blocking a deeper relationship with God? A brokenness or past hurt in need of healing? Francie guides the listener through the process of restoration and freedom. She also gives ideas on how to help our children process their own feelings and lies they believe, directing them to the truth in God's Word. 

Dec 02, 2013
God Centered Mom Podcast Episode 3 with Amanda White (OhAmanda)
32:59

Heather interviews Amanda White about ministering to families while staying home with kids. Finding God's big dream while serving those right in front of you. They also discuss Amanda's Christmas Advent curriculum, "Truth in the Tinsel"...daily devotional and ornament crafts for little hands leading up to Christmas. 

Nov 24, 2013
God Centered Mom-ep 2 with Hayley Morgan (from The Tiny Twig)
39:26

Heather MacFadyen interviews Hayley Morgan (from the Tiny Twig and author of "No Brainer Wardrobe"). These young moms share thoughts on the hardest part of motherhood. How having more than the social norm of children has made them both more introverted. What it means to "mother openhandedly". They each share personal stories of times they felt distant from God and how He brought them close. 

Nov 17, 2013
First Episode with Mom Mentor Leslie Johnson (Sursee Gal)
37:57

Heather MacFadyen interviews Leslie Johnson (from www.surseegal.com), fellow mother of 4 boys. Leslie offers wisdom, encouragement and pratical tips she has gained from growing boys into men. Through this interview the listener will be encouraged on how to replace "me" with "He".

Nov 09, 2013